Only Chance
"Hey." Agent Doggett tilted his head up at his partner as she walked through the door of the cosy flat, watching as she approached him. "Where were you today? I couldn't get hold of you. Ten more minutes and I was going to come looking."
Finally, the tears she had been fighting welled up and made her eyes glisten. He leant forward, but before he could rise Monica had dropped into the seat beside him. Closing her eyes she tucked her right arm under her left and cradled her head in her palm. "What am I going to do, John?"
"Do about what?"
"That horrible, hideous old man with those cigarettes; he's alive."
Pausing, he blew out a heavy breath and reached across her for the hand over her face; coaxing her to look at him. "What happened? Did he threaten you?"
"No," Reyes frowned and shook her head, every feature noticeably downcast. "Not exactly, sort of. He's got some scheme, a plan already in place; he's going to kill everybody, John."
"So we stop him, right?" He flexed his hand in hers, seeking to provide a little extra comfort, though the half smile he offered her was equally unsuccessful, instead he was sure more moisture was pooling around her eyes. "Let me help you with this."
"I don't know that you can. I think this one's all on me."
"I'm your partner; there's no such thing as all on you anymore. I've got your back with this too."
"John..." She shook her head, her whole body beginning to quake, and as her grip on his hand became weak, he curled an arm around her to draw her into him.
"No, just breathe; tell me what he said."
"Everyone's going to be infected, with every disease, and no immunity. We're all going to die, all of humanity, except the chosen few, and there's nothing we can do to prevent it."
"If it's all in place then what does he want from you?"
"He wants me to work for him, and if I do I'll get immunity, and he says Agent Scully will have it and he'll offer it to Mulder..." Reyes' breath caught in her throat when she realised his expression was not going to change; it didn't faze him that he wasn't part of the man's plan, not even that he hadn't been used as leverage against her. "And you, I, I'm going to ask for your immunity, in fact I won't do it without that."
Thumb stroking her shoulder, he tentatively shook his head, just a fraction. "This is bigger than me, Monica."
"I don't care. If he's going to make me do this then..." She leant forward, out of his arms, fingers scrunching tightly in her hair as she peered round at him. "This is the only way we can get inside information on this, to maybe get a cure, and if... should I fail us all, I can't be alone. Please."
His head twitched, nodding, her tears mirrored in his eyes whilst words couldn't form on his lips. "Of course." He dabbed at the corner of her eye, his thumb brushing across her temple and leading his fingertips to drift along her jaw until the two met at the very tip of her chin. "I would never leave you."
Her expression changed, softened, though didn't exactly lift. "This is the only chance we've got to save everyone, and I'm scared; I'm really scared."
Doggett leant forward, downwards to close the distance between them. "And I'm really proud of you, so very proud. And I trust you, even with this."
"I'll have to leave the FBI, move-"
"And I will come with you; and when this is over, when you've helped save everyone, I will vouch for you and we'll get your job back and you'll be my partner again, officially anyway." He watched as she sat back, her gaze firm, staring into him, searching for something. "Let me bear this with you. Please let me take that pain away."
The frown didn't falter, no hint of a smile or the vibrant beacon of optimism that she was in his life. "Everyone will think I abandoned the Bureau, betrayed it for his evil cause."
He shook his head to dispel that fear. "No. I will know that you did it to save me, and hopefully everyone." Carefully stroking her face, John cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead.
Exhaling, Reyes leant into his touch, welcoming more of it as he coaxed her closer. Eventually he wrapped an arm back around shoulders, squeezing her as she leant into his side. "I know I don't have a choice, but I don't want to do this."
Tears broke forth, his partner buried her face in his chest, and all he could do was hold her, head cradled in his palm.
Whatever it took from him, C.G.B. Spender would not break Monica Reyes.
A/N: Since Season 10 aired I've seen lots of people angry or upset about Monica's appearance in it. I've seen people upset about her being 'out of character' to 'go along' with CSM's plans, seen her called selfish for doing it to get herself immunity, seen people calling for redemption for her in Season 11.
I was genuinely surprised by these; my understanding was that she'd been forced into a horrible situation to try and save the entire human race - after all it was her who contacted Scully to offer up the inside information! So I started writing, wanting to put my theory in writing.
Later I saw a tweet (retweeted by Annabeth Gish) asking what people wanted to see in Season 11, I tweeted back about a clarification so people would stop calling for redemption: /Abboz/status/884416461028118528 and I was pleased to find that Annabeth liked my tweet. I've taken that to mean she agrees it's clarification that's needed rather than redemption - or maybe she just wants to see Doggett/Reyes too!
Either way, I found it encouraging and got working on finishing and naming this. I hope people like it, and I hope that a few other people make this their headcanon like it is mine.