Our minds, our lips, and our souls are a perfect match. His breath, his body, his mind. The way he loses his temper, it drives me to that place. People tell me things, 'Maya you need to eat more' Maya you need to take a deep breath' Maya you need to sleep more' Maya cover yourself more' Maya take better care of yourself' Maya love yourself' Maya leave him or your killing yourself'
What they don't understand is I do eat, I eat him. I do breath, he is my air. I do sleep, just with him. I won't cover myself, I love showing myself to him. He does take care of me. He loves me enough. And I can't live without Lucas. I understand why they worry, Lucas has a temper, and I have one of my own. I still remember Mr. Matthews saying 'He can hit you Maya, be careful.' Oh Mr. Matthews he did hit me, he hit me so hard. But not that type of hit, not a punch or slap, he hit my heart hard. I fell darn fucking in love with my old huckleberry. With my ranger rick, bucky mcbiong boing, my Lucas. I won't ever give up, I won't give up on us. I know our love story will work out, I knew from the first day. Looking back, fuck I should have saw this coming.
September 7th 2010
"Hi I'm Maya, you're really cute. We should hang out sometime, you make me happy, you don't pay enough attention to me. This isn't working out, it's not me it's you. We can still be friends not really." After I broke up with my boyfriend I had for 5 seconds I smiled a glance at the boy in the blue shirts blue eyes. Gosh he is cute. I whipped around and went back to my best friend Riley. I looked into the goofy brown eyed brunette. Without even thinking I sent her into his lap, not knowing what an effect that would have in my life.
October 9th 4:52 pm 2012
We're in 9th grade now, I'm 15 and so is everyone else except Lucas he's 16. Riley's always found it weird that he's 'older than us' I tell her great now he can drive us places. I shook off my thought as I continued to move my brush across the canvas.
"It's just plain blue." I felt my heart jump.
"Fuckboy what the hell?" I snaped "You nearly scared me to death.
"Sorry shortstack." Lucas said as he placed his books down on one of the tables in the art room "But you still didn't tell me what your painting."
"It's emotion huckleberry, you wouldn't get it." I take my eyes off my painting and look at him. My checks start burning red, I just noticed he was staring at me in 'aww' and that's when I remembered I'm a mess, with a paint stained apron, and my hair lazily thrown into a ponytail. I kept gazing at him. He was always cute as much as I always hated to admit it. His beautiful blue eyes, light brown hair, bad boy smile.
"Lucas what are you doing here?" shit I called him by his name. I saw Lucas's face expression change from 'aww' to confused. "What did I do?" Lucas questioned.
"Nothing huckleberry;" I pressed my lips together feeling them go pale for a split moment "I've always known your name silly."
"'Okay. Well I was wondering if you would like to go get something to eat. My treat."
"Free food, awesome sure." I stood off my stool and start to pack my art supply. "Is Riley or Farkle coming?"
"No." Lucas replied .
"Zay?" I question. Lucas just shakes his head.
"Okay so just me and you?" I say slowly.
"Yeah, we barley do stuff alone together, and we're friends right Maya?"
"Yeah we're friends and all but I don't know. We've never been that close." I instantly regretted saying that. I saw Lucas's smile fade.
"I've always's thought we were close;" I saw Lucas pause and take a deep breath "But if you don't feel like we're that close then lets get closer to each other. I mean I like spending time with you Maya." I felt my heart skip when those last words left his perfect lips. "Okay Bucky Mcboing boing." I see him smile.
"Let's go now."
November 9th 2011 11:38 pm 2012
I slid the sharp blade across my wrist. I saw the blood run down my hand onto the wooden floor of my bedroom. I wanted this nightmare called life to be over with, I wanted to die. I've always been a cutter but this time I'm going to kill myself. I swear. I re-slice my wrist even deeper this time. I let out a small gasp in pain "Fuck." I sighed as I looked at the small hand gun I had on my bed. I read it was the least painful way to kill yourself if you just shoot yourself in the head, with shaking hands I picked up the gun. I pressed it to my head. "I'm sorry Riley, Mr. Matthews, Farkle. Lucas. I love you all." Just as I was about to pull the trigger when someone said "Maya put down the gun please." I turned my head only to see Lucas shaking as he slowly climbed threw my window.
"Please Maya" He begged with a shaky voice "Put down the gun"
"Lucas I'm sorry I said we aren't close we are and you're the best huckleberry ever."
"It's okay Maya, please do this for me, for Riley, for Farkle. Put down that gun." I kept the gun pressed firmly against my head with my hands shaking. I saw Lucas slowly walk towards me "Maya talk to me."
"I can't do this crap anymore Lucas, I'm broken."
"And I was just as broken as you." Those words that escaped his lips made me slowly move the gun away from my head "What?" I said so quietly it was almost a whisper. Before Lucas could reply he quickly reacted and grabbed the gun from me. My heart went 100 miles per hour when his hand connected with mine. I don't like Lucas, I don't. I watched him carefully unload the gun as he said "When I was in Texas before I moved here and met you and Riley, I had issues;" He halted for a moment. I saw pain in his eyes, for once his bright blue eyes looked drained of color, they looked grey. "I had mental issues Maya, I couldn't control my temper, my behavior was just awful. I got into fight after fight, my mom said if I didn't learn how to control my temper we would move to New York. At the time that was a bad thing." Lucas sat down on my bed before continuing "I found a way to coup with the anger. But it was a bad way, I started to cut myself. Cut after cut, depression, hate, just plain anger started to eat me alive. I was angry at my dad, my friends, and mostly myself." Lucas stopped and looked deep into my eyes, he even leaned closer to my face, I felt his hands gently cup my face "Maya, I'm about to tell you something I've never told anyone before. You're the only one. And if you don't think we're that close then I hope you think different after I tell you this." I looked at him a small tear leaving my eyes "You can trust me Lucas. I wont tell anyone. I promise." He looked at me for a few more seconds then he spoke "I tried to overdoes on heroine but failed. My mom found me in my room took me to the hospital. She kept a close eye on me. Then after that I tried to commit suicide again, this time with a gun. I only had one bullet and I shot myself in the wrong place. After that me and my mom moved to New York and things got better." My mouth dropped open. The moral compass tried to kill himself? Mr. Perfect tried to kill himself? "Maya, don't kill yourself. Your so talented, smart, funny, amazing, and beautiful. You have so much to live for. I'm all better now, I've learned to control this problem and be happy. I can help you. Please just let me."
At first I said nothing. I just looked at my wall. Lucas tried to kill himself? Wow. I looked at him and nodded my head. "Please help me."
"Of course my shortstack. Anything for you, all I want is for you to be happy." I smiled gently. I felt like 20 pounds were taken off my shoulders, he knew. It wasn't a secret. Then I suddenly felt something other than numbness. I felt sadness and joy. I felt feelings.
"Lucas" I mumbled .
"Yeah?"
'Can you do me a few favors?"
"Of course."
"Please don't tell anyone about what I tried to do. I promise I wont do it again but please don't tell."
'"Okay. I won't."
"Lucas?"
"Hmmm?"
"One more thing."
"Yeah Maya."
"Can you hold me?" I saw Lucas's serious face suddenly turn into a hearty smile.
"Of course. "
We both laid down, I felt his strong arms wrap around me and pull me close to his chest.
That's when I noticed I was in love with him.
November 15th 10:15 am 2012
After me and Lucas had our little run in we got super close. And when I mean close I 'mean' close. Ever since he's been picking me up from my apartment and driving me to school, walking me to class, holding y hands, hugging me, kissing my cheeks and forehead, waiting for me in the art room while I paint, and driving me home, and sometimes he even spent the night at my place. I've never felt more happy and alive. I smiled to myself as I opened my locker, now were was that stupid paper I actually did. "Maya, can I ask you something?" Riley asked.
"Sure peaches." I replied still looking for that history paper Lucas made me do. Before Riley could asked her question I felt a strong pair of hands over my eyes "Guess who?" I heard Lucas's deep voice ask.
"Hmmm let me think Lucas." I said turning around and playfully taking of his cap and putting it on me "How do I look?"
"Beautiful princess Maya." He teased. I giggled; he gently leaned and kissed my cheek.
"Lucas." I heard Riley suddenly say.
"Oh hey riley." Lucas said cheerfully. Crap I forgot Riley was right there. Over the past few years, Lucas got over his crush on Riley but Riley on the other hand is still in love with Lucas. Gosh I'm a horrible friend.
"Umm I didn't know you and Maya were dating." I saw her eyes jealously scan me. Which is something, Riley's never jealous. Lucas just smiled and stayed quite
"We're not dating riles." I say quickly.
"Okay."
And okay was the last thing my bubbly best friend said to me the rest of the day. Part of me hurts because I know Riley still loves him, she still haven't gave up on the cowboy. She's my best friend and all I want is for her to be happy, but for once I want to be happy too.
Thanksgiving 2011 5:56 pm 2012
"Your turn Lucas." Riley said as she moved her dog across the monopoly board. Lucas let go of my hand as he rolled the dice. He got a 8 but before he could even move his piece I heard the Matthew's apartment door open "Uncle josh" I heard Auggie scream as he shot off the coach and ran to Josh. I saw Lucas look at me "What?" I snapped suddenly feeling irritated by him..
"Nothing." Lucas mumbled then he gently held me and pressed his lips to my forehead.
"Maya?" I heard Josh say. I pulled away from Lucas and looked at Josh. He looked hurt, sad, even jealous. "Hi Uncle Josh I said standing up and giving him a hug. He returned the hug and squeezed me tightly. "I missed you Maya." He said not taking his eyes off Lucas "You look beautiful."
"Thank you." I said simply. Then I smiled, a year ago I would have had a heart attack if Josh just looked at me but now its Lucas I feel this way about.
"Oh no you don't." I heard a voice snap at Josh. I turned to see a angry Mr. Matthews "You will not flirt with my innocent Maya. She is not a toy Josh. She's a person, a girl to be specific, and I'm a man, I know what your thinking about her." I snorted a laugh as Josh's face turned red "Cory no I would never think of-
"Oh yeah you would, I know boys, especially young boys;" Then he turned around sharply "Same goes to you Lucas."
"Oh sir you know me, I would never touch Maya… at least that way." After Lucas said that Riley suddenly stood up and looked at me and Lucas "Maya I think you should leave."
"What? Why Riley?" I was shocked. Riley has never asked me to leave before.
"I'm tired of you, rubbing your relationship with Lucas in my face. You KNOW I like him, you've always known that. You both barely used to talk, then all of a sudden your all over each other. And it's gross. Suddenly he has pet names for you, and you giggle. Crap there are even rumors that your sleeping with him"
"Riley;" I said barely able to contain myself. Everyone was now watching me, Riley, and Lucas. Josh, Topanga, Mr. Matthews, Auggie, Riley's grandpa and grandma. "Riley I'm virgin, and you know that. Lucas is not my boyfriend. " Suddenly I felt angry with her "If I laugh your mad? Wait no it's who I'm laughing with. Riley I'm finally happy and your mad at me for being happy?" normally I'd feel ashamed of talking about my sex or really my feelings all together but now I have no shame, Riley's being the opposite of herself. "I'll leave now Riley, but you know what? As much as I love your family, your nothing like them." I looked deeply at her "Lets go Lucas."
"I thought you were over it." Lucas said to Riley.
"How can you think that? Lucas we had something so special."
"It was cute Riley but we were never good at holding hands and stuff." He gave her a small smile "but you and Farkle are."
"What?"
"Think about it Riley."
"Lucas let's go." I snapped. This time he followed me to the door.
"Maya don't go." I heard Mr. Matthew's say "I can't spend thanksgiving without my second daughter."
"Riley doesn't want me here."
"I do Maya, I just exploded. I'm sorry peaches." I saw her open her arms. I walked over to her and excepted the hug. "Let's not fight anymore pumpkin"
"Agreed." I pulled away and smiled at her before suddenly smiling.
"oh Lucas you owe me $50,00 for landing on my property."
"Dammit."
November 30th 10:58 pm.
I sighed as I rested my head on my pillow. Finally sleep time. I started to cuddle in my sheets when I heard my window open. Maybe if I just ignore Lucas he'll go away tonight. Not that I don't want to see him I'm just tired that's all. I felt a weight go on my bed, I felt his body gently lay next to be as he wrapped his arms around me. "Maya, I know your awake." He whispered.
"You caught me ranger rick." I said turned slightly to make eye contact with him.
"How does your mom never wonder where you are at night?"
"Zay covers for me."
"sheesh, look who I rubbed on."
"Are you implying what I think?"
"Pervert." Then we stopped our little chatter. I looked deeply into his eyes. Then it happened, he leaned in and kissed me. I felt his lips touch my lips. Nothing else mattered just his soft lips on mine. I moaned when I felt his hands trace my body gently, then without even thinking I kissed his even more passionately. Then I felt his hands trace my shirt and slowly start to pull it up. Then I pulled away "Lucas?'
"It's fine if your not ready." He said quickly.
"No I want to. I want to make love with you, it's just…"
"I have one." I felt my cheeks go red. I know what he meant.
"Naughty huckleberry, you planned to rack me up tonight?" I teased.
"Aww come on you know I love you shortstack." Then I felt my heart skip. He loves me. He said those three words I've always wanted to hear a boy say.
"You love me?"
"Since the first day I laid my eyes on you."
"I love you too."
I pressed my lips to his aggressively and felt him touch my body everywhere. My hands traced his muscles. Our clothes left our bodies, and my body became his.
December 7th 6:14 pm
Let's just say ever since I lost my virginity to Lucas everything changed from good to bad. He haven't spoken to me since. Whenever I try to talk to him or even look at him he ignores me. Walks away. Ever since I gave myself to him. I can't believe I was used by him. He got my body and my heart. I need to talk to him, at least fight with him, something to give me closure. That's why I'm just going to go in the boys locker room and corner him. Little old huckleberry cant ignore me if he'll want me to leave, I don't even care if it's embarrassing to him, after all I've seen him naked before, after all my mouth touched his 'part'. I don't care if his whole baseball team was in there, he's a jerk.
1, 2, 3, go me. I slowly walked through the locker room doors, I saw the whole baseball team just barely pacing up all their stuff. On the bright side of this I didn't have to see all of them naked.
"Lucas."
That caught the chattering team's attention.
"Lucas your girlfriend's mad at you." Zay said teasingly.
"Shut up Zay." Me and Lucas said at the same time.
"Maya what are you doing here?" Lucas asked angrily "This is a fucking boys locker room."
"Well before I answer your questions ranger rick, why did you act like you care about me, say the L word, fuck me, then ignore the hell out of me?" After those words left my lips, the whole team was now staring at Lucas with interest.
"You slept with Maya?" One of his teammates asked. Lucas said nothing, he just nodded his head. "fuck man how was it?" Zay asked.
"I'm right here Zay." I snapped. "So Lucas what the hell was your good reason? Remember Lucas I can spill it now if you don't answer me." I hated using his little dark suicidal past against him but I was pissed.
"Maya baby I-
"Don't baby me Frair, what the fuck is your problem?" I snapped.
"I was afraid okay?" He finally snapped at me.
"Afraid of what?" I snapped.
"Of love." When he said those words I felt my heart melt. All the anger leave my veins.
"Shit Lucas man that, now that is cheesy."
"Get out." I suddenly say to his teammates.
"What? Maya you can't tell us what to-
"Go." This time I guess they got what I meant because they left.
"Lucas, why would you be afraid of being in love with me?" I asked as I took a step closer to him, my hand touching his cheek.
"Maya, you're the best thing that ever happened to me, and if I lost you… I would go back in Texas state." Then I pressed my lips onto his. I forcefully kissed him. I felt his hands roam my body everywhere.
Let's just say, we had really amazing make up sex.
February 1st 2012
Ever since me and Lucas's 'meeting' in the locker room, me and him have been having the best relationship ever. I mean I always knew Lucas was a great guy but he's an amazing boyfriend. Everything was perfect, he spent almost every night in my room. Sometimes we made love quietly and sometimes we just cuddled and talked. Lucas has been staying at my house so much that his mom suggested that he goes to live with 'Zay'. Zay also haven't left me or Lucas alone about our locker talk. But the awesome thing is Lucas's baseball team never told anyone about what happened, the whole school is completely clueless we're dating. Gosh for once I feel like there's hope. The only problem is Riley, with Valentine's day coming up, there is also the dance. And Riley won't shut up about how she thinks Lucas is going to ask her. I feel bad, ever since her outburst she's been acting like nothing ever happened. Well Sort of. Every minute she's around Lucas she can't keep her hands to herself. She has to touch him, giggle, flutter her eye lashes. And let me tell you. It's fucking gross. But of course she's still my little ray of sunshine so I keep quiet. She can't know that me and Lucas are a 'thing'.
"Maya?"
"Yeah Riley?" I said turning my head to look at her.
"We're at the bay window and your not talking to me." She stated.
"I'm tired Riles."
"Are you sure this has nothing to do with Lucas?" My head jerked up and I looked at her in the eyes. Why is she bringing this up?
"What about Lucas?" I asked calmly.
"Well I know your his girlfriend and I know that you think the way I flirt with him is gross. I only flirted with him to make you jealous so you'd tell me. But you didn't. Why?"
I was stuck at words. This has never happened to me before. I love Riley, she's my everything. She's MY sister. But I can't believe she was saying these things. "I wanted to tell you but you like him and-
"I used to like him Maya. I'm over him. I have my eyes set on someone new. So just don't explain yourself, I forgive you just don't hide anything from me again."
"Who?" I questioned.
"Farkle." She giggled.
"Fuck what?"
"Maya language." Riley teased. I smiled at her.
"Ring power?"
"Ring power."
So guys this is going to be a two shot story. Ugg it took me days to write all this. The next chapter will show what happens next and goes back to the present Maya!:) This was my first story ever. Please review! The second chapter will be up faster if I get lots of reviews:P