Ok if you hate this, please understand that tonight I was stuck in an empty
house with a baby for an hour watching him. Because his mom was moving
there was no furniture or anything but little Corban and his truck... so I
went insane and thought of this fic, now I can't get it out of my head so I
have to write it.
It really has nothing to do with ANY of my personal beliefs and I don't think Erik would really do this, but anyways, here we go....
Takes place after book, Gaston Leroux.
Erik lay there thinking of what he should do. In his mind thousands of different voices told him that he was useless, worthless, nothing, ignorant, a monster, in human, and many other horrid things that he could only catch glimpses off.
At first he had tried to block out the voices that scratched away at the very fabric of his mind only to find he couldn't silence them, they were only getting louder.
The voices all sounded like Christine's.
It was then he decided he could no longer endure the pain he was in. It was if his heart and been made of crystal, a delicate glass that had been shattered by merely a flower. A flower named Christine.
Christine was gone, gone forever. He had lost the only wonderful thing in his life and now all he wanted was to curl up and die.
Die... that was the only answer, he had to die, if he died the pain would cease, and he could finally rest his weary soul. No longer would he feel, whether it be pain or love. He would give anything if he could just die right now.
Slowly he got up from his coffin and went into the kitchen.
He wanted his death to be elegant. He did not think someone finding his bloated carcase in the lake or corpse hanging by his own Punjab lasso would be the simplicity he was looking for.
The problem with suicide is eventually you will be found, and he never wanted to be on display again.
In death he would no longer be a living corpse, no longer be on display for the scornful and piercing eyes of the human race.
Therefore he had to end his life while in his coffin, that way, he was already buried, buried beneath the ultimate tombstone, the Paris Opera House.
Finding what he had been looking for, he slowly retreated back into his room. He dressed himself in his best carefully, making sure that no button was undone, no hair was out of place, and carefully climbed into his predestined tomb.
"Please, someone, anyone, just kill me...Death come for me..." he whispered through tears as he lay in his shallow grave.
"Excuse me?" said a rather soothing female voice.
Erik sat up abruptly and looked around, he could see no one in the darkness of his small room but he felt a presence anyways.
"Who's there?" He said in an intimidating voice, not showing his fear that he was being watched, he hated that feeling of being watched.
"Well, you ASKED for me, and now your wondering who I am..." The voice said to him.
"Show yourself!" Erik said angrily.
"Alright, but um... please don't be frightened?" The voice said sadly.
"Please mlle., I'm sure nothing can scare me anymore." Erik said watching in the direction he heard the voice come from.
Slowly a female, dressed in a simple black dress walked out of the corner.
She wore a smile on her pale face that was framed by black hair,
"You look like a raven who had just taken the form of a human..." He said softly under his breath.
She laughed a cold laugh and came closer to his coffin.
"Really? I was recently told that I was the scariest thing someone had ever seen. It is nice to have someone to appreciate me..." She spoke smoothly, like a soft, polished Onyx stone.
"Who are you Mlle? And why are you here in my home?" Erik asked regaining his composer.
"For the last time you invited me, and I? I am death..." She said smiling.
"You? Death? That is the most absurd thing I have ever heard!" Erik said looking at the young woman.
"Pardon? Oh what? Since I don't look like this?" She snapped her fingers, making herself a rather tall being cloaked in black.
One arm that was not draped by the cloak was holding a rather large scythe and Erik couldn't help be terrified by the fact it was a skeleton arm.
"Since I don't look like this I'm not death?" She said and snapped her fingers again to turn back to the ravishing young woman she had been previously.
"What the? And with? That is the most brilliant trickery I have ever seen!" Erik said gasping for breath; she had nearly given him a heart attack.
"Erik, shut UP! It wasn't trickery, it was me, I am death... god get it through that thick skull of yours!" She said twirling her finger through her straight black hair.
"What do you want with me?" He said realizing he was still sitting in his coffin.
"It isn't what I want to do with YOU, it's what you want to do with ME... you summoned me after all." She said trailing her hand along the edge of his coffin.
Erik gently reached out to touch it only to find her pull back suddenly.
"What's wrong?" He asked looking at her as she took a step away from him.
"If you touch me you die, and I don't know if you want that... just yet." She said hesitantly.
"Well, as a matter of fact, I do..." He said choking down a sob.
"I can't believe you! Normally I don't talk people out of this, but you! What a waste! Are you really going to throw your life away for a little tarte?" She said haughtily.
"Tarte? She was the love of my life! And as for life? What kind of life is this? I have not been living, I have been surviving, and I do not want to survive anymore. Life should be a balance of light and darkness... I have had nothing but darkness, nothing but the dark." Erik said trailing off.
"I know the feeling..." Death said bitterly and started to look around his little room.
"Then give me what I yearn for! Let me be free of this everyday hell I have been living!" Erik said suddenly, if she wasn't Death, she could still help him find the peace he yearned for.
"What? Trade this hell for another? Remember Erik, that hell is not one that can be changed... this hell has it's perks, you have your music, your beautiful music..." She said, for the first time trailing off.
"Music is no longer a solace, it is a wound that whenever I play, sing or listen to anyone else, reopens. Hell is not something I believe in, are you sure it exists?" He asked knowing if she were death, she could give him a better answer then anyone else, the only superior answer he could get would be from the devil himself.
The woman sighed. "No Erik, there is no hell, nor heaven nor anything. You have one chance, and that is to live this life to it's fullest." She looked up at him in the eyes for the first time. He was surprised that she did not have the black ones he had so often dreamt about hiding in the corner. No her eyes were a soft blue, those that could turn soft from cold rapidly.
"You had a chance to make this life all it was worth, and you still do, why do you insist on death?" She asked sadly.
"Because there is nothing left for me in this life, I do not agree with Monsieur Shakespeare any longer." He said watching her every move.
"It is better to of loved and lost, then never to have loved at all..." She said quoting what they both were thinking.
Little did Erik know that she had heard Shakespeare say that him very self, on his deathbed.
"Is there nothing I can do to change your mind?" Death asked in such a quiet tone that if it had been other then Erik himself, someone who was used to the deafening silence, would not of heard it.
"I am positive, life is not worth living anymore. For the longest time I woke in the morning and did not look forward to the day, but I managed to get by... When she came into my life, I breathed her; she became the object of waking. I understand that would not make much sense to you..."
"No, I understand, She was the reason why you didn't want to fall back into the oblivion of sleep, though even in sleep you are tortured by dreams of the past."
Erik didn't even ask her why she knew all of this, for she was Death and obviously had enough power to meddle in the affairs of any humans life if she wanted. "Don't you think you could ever fall in love again?" She said hopefully, trying to sound cheery.
"Never could I love someone the way I had Christine, I don't think I would ever want to anyways. Why would I put myself in the position to fall again? I fell and I fell hard, but I can't stop falling, I want this falling to end..." He said searching in Death's eyes.
Sighing she took a step closer to him. "I just wanted to make sure Erik, I just wanted to make sure this is what you wanted."
Silently he nodded and wondered what she was going to do about his simple request of release.
"Erik, close your eyes..." She said to him and he did obediently...
Slowly he felt the straps of his mask loosen, but he did not feel the touch of the soft-eyed raven he had just talked to.
Stiffening, he wondered what she was doing; he felt the cool breeze against his face and was too terrified to open his eyes.
In moments he forgot that she was Death herself and forgot that his horrible visage was nothing compared to those she had seen many times before. "Relax Erik," She commanded in her smooth voice, though he thought he recognized something new to it.
Was it pity? Sympathy? What ever it was, it had warmed the coolness to a soft nurturing sound.
"I will not have you die hiding..." She explained to him who was still cringing at the thought of his mask being off.
Suddenly, before he realized what was going on, he felt the softest pressure against his lips, at first he didn't understand the sensation until the pressure was increased and a hand was placed behind his head to bring him closer.
He was being kissed! Kissed by a woman who had seen his face and did not coil back in fear. How could this be happening he thought? The most affectionate thing he had ever received was to be allowed to kiss Christine, to be able to touch her heavenly forehead and her feet... but never had anyone ever willing touched his lips, let alone any part of him before.
It was not Christine of course, but to have a woman treated him tenderly made his heart soften, slowly he felt, as though he was intoxicated, drunk in pleasure as the voices of agony were silenced. No longer did he feel the harsh glares and scorn from humanity, but the peace... all he felt was peace. As Death lowered Erik down into his coffin she knew he was not breathing before she checked. Slowly a tear lowered down her cheek as she thought of how cruel humanity was.
"Goodnight Erik," She whispered before she returned into the shadows of his room.
"Rest in peace..."
It really has nothing to do with ANY of my personal beliefs and I don't think Erik would really do this, but anyways, here we go....
Takes place after book, Gaston Leroux.
Erik lay there thinking of what he should do. In his mind thousands of different voices told him that he was useless, worthless, nothing, ignorant, a monster, in human, and many other horrid things that he could only catch glimpses off.
At first he had tried to block out the voices that scratched away at the very fabric of his mind only to find he couldn't silence them, they were only getting louder.
The voices all sounded like Christine's.
It was then he decided he could no longer endure the pain he was in. It was if his heart and been made of crystal, a delicate glass that had been shattered by merely a flower. A flower named Christine.
Christine was gone, gone forever. He had lost the only wonderful thing in his life and now all he wanted was to curl up and die.
Die... that was the only answer, he had to die, if he died the pain would cease, and he could finally rest his weary soul. No longer would he feel, whether it be pain or love. He would give anything if he could just die right now.
Slowly he got up from his coffin and went into the kitchen.
He wanted his death to be elegant. He did not think someone finding his bloated carcase in the lake or corpse hanging by his own Punjab lasso would be the simplicity he was looking for.
The problem with suicide is eventually you will be found, and he never wanted to be on display again.
In death he would no longer be a living corpse, no longer be on display for the scornful and piercing eyes of the human race.
Therefore he had to end his life while in his coffin, that way, he was already buried, buried beneath the ultimate tombstone, the Paris Opera House.
Finding what he had been looking for, he slowly retreated back into his room. He dressed himself in his best carefully, making sure that no button was undone, no hair was out of place, and carefully climbed into his predestined tomb.
"Please, someone, anyone, just kill me...Death come for me..." he whispered through tears as he lay in his shallow grave.
"Excuse me?" said a rather soothing female voice.
Erik sat up abruptly and looked around, he could see no one in the darkness of his small room but he felt a presence anyways.
"Who's there?" He said in an intimidating voice, not showing his fear that he was being watched, he hated that feeling of being watched.
"Well, you ASKED for me, and now your wondering who I am..." The voice said to him.
"Show yourself!" Erik said angrily.
"Alright, but um... please don't be frightened?" The voice said sadly.
"Please mlle., I'm sure nothing can scare me anymore." Erik said watching in the direction he heard the voice come from.
Slowly a female, dressed in a simple black dress walked out of the corner.
She wore a smile on her pale face that was framed by black hair,
"You look like a raven who had just taken the form of a human..." He said softly under his breath.
She laughed a cold laugh and came closer to his coffin.
"Really? I was recently told that I was the scariest thing someone had ever seen. It is nice to have someone to appreciate me..." She spoke smoothly, like a soft, polished Onyx stone.
"Who are you Mlle? And why are you here in my home?" Erik asked regaining his composer.
"For the last time you invited me, and I? I am death..." She said smiling.
"You? Death? That is the most absurd thing I have ever heard!" Erik said looking at the young woman.
"Pardon? Oh what? Since I don't look like this?" She snapped her fingers, making herself a rather tall being cloaked in black.
One arm that was not draped by the cloak was holding a rather large scythe and Erik couldn't help be terrified by the fact it was a skeleton arm.
"Since I don't look like this I'm not death?" She said and snapped her fingers again to turn back to the ravishing young woman she had been previously.
"What the? And with? That is the most brilliant trickery I have ever seen!" Erik said gasping for breath; she had nearly given him a heart attack.
"Erik, shut UP! It wasn't trickery, it was me, I am death... god get it through that thick skull of yours!" She said twirling her finger through her straight black hair.
"What do you want with me?" He said realizing he was still sitting in his coffin.
"It isn't what I want to do with YOU, it's what you want to do with ME... you summoned me after all." She said trailing her hand along the edge of his coffin.
Erik gently reached out to touch it only to find her pull back suddenly.
"What's wrong?" He asked looking at her as she took a step away from him.
"If you touch me you die, and I don't know if you want that... just yet." She said hesitantly.
"Well, as a matter of fact, I do..." He said choking down a sob.
"I can't believe you! Normally I don't talk people out of this, but you! What a waste! Are you really going to throw your life away for a little tarte?" She said haughtily.
"Tarte? She was the love of my life! And as for life? What kind of life is this? I have not been living, I have been surviving, and I do not want to survive anymore. Life should be a balance of light and darkness... I have had nothing but darkness, nothing but the dark." Erik said trailing off.
"I know the feeling..." Death said bitterly and started to look around his little room.
"Then give me what I yearn for! Let me be free of this everyday hell I have been living!" Erik said suddenly, if she wasn't Death, she could still help him find the peace he yearned for.
"What? Trade this hell for another? Remember Erik, that hell is not one that can be changed... this hell has it's perks, you have your music, your beautiful music..." She said, for the first time trailing off.
"Music is no longer a solace, it is a wound that whenever I play, sing or listen to anyone else, reopens. Hell is not something I believe in, are you sure it exists?" He asked knowing if she were death, she could give him a better answer then anyone else, the only superior answer he could get would be from the devil himself.
The woman sighed. "No Erik, there is no hell, nor heaven nor anything. You have one chance, and that is to live this life to it's fullest." She looked up at him in the eyes for the first time. He was surprised that she did not have the black ones he had so often dreamt about hiding in the corner. No her eyes were a soft blue, those that could turn soft from cold rapidly.
"You had a chance to make this life all it was worth, and you still do, why do you insist on death?" She asked sadly.
"Because there is nothing left for me in this life, I do not agree with Monsieur Shakespeare any longer." He said watching her every move.
"It is better to of loved and lost, then never to have loved at all..." She said quoting what they both were thinking.
Little did Erik know that she had heard Shakespeare say that him very self, on his deathbed.
"Is there nothing I can do to change your mind?" Death asked in such a quiet tone that if it had been other then Erik himself, someone who was used to the deafening silence, would not of heard it.
"I am positive, life is not worth living anymore. For the longest time I woke in the morning and did not look forward to the day, but I managed to get by... When she came into my life, I breathed her; she became the object of waking. I understand that would not make much sense to you..."
"No, I understand, She was the reason why you didn't want to fall back into the oblivion of sleep, though even in sleep you are tortured by dreams of the past."
Erik didn't even ask her why she knew all of this, for she was Death and obviously had enough power to meddle in the affairs of any humans life if she wanted. "Don't you think you could ever fall in love again?" She said hopefully, trying to sound cheery.
"Never could I love someone the way I had Christine, I don't think I would ever want to anyways. Why would I put myself in the position to fall again? I fell and I fell hard, but I can't stop falling, I want this falling to end..." He said searching in Death's eyes.
Sighing she took a step closer to him. "I just wanted to make sure Erik, I just wanted to make sure this is what you wanted."
Silently he nodded and wondered what she was going to do about his simple request of release.
"Erik, close your eyes..." She said to him and he did obediently...
Slowly he felt the straps of his mask loosen, but he did not feel the touch of the soft-eyed raven he had just talked to.
Stiffening, he wondered what she was doing; he felt the cool breeze against his face and was too terrified to open his eyes.
In moments he forgot that she was Death herself and forgot that his horrible visage was nothing compared to those she had seen many times before. "Relax Erik," She commanded in her smooth voice, though he thought he recognized something new to it.
Was it pity? Sympathy? What ever it was, it had warmed the coolness to a soft nurturing sound.
"I will not have you die hiding..." She explained to him who was still cringing at the thought of his mask being off.
Suddenly, before he realized what was going on, he felt the softest pressure against his lips, at first he didn't understand the sensation until the pressure was increased and a hand was placed behind his head to bring him closer.
He was being kissed! Kissed by a woman who had seen his face and did not coil back in fear. How could this be happening he thought? The most affectionate thing he had ever received was to be allowed to kiss Christine, to be able to touch her heavenly forehead and her feet... but never had anyone ever willing touched his lips, let alone any part of him before.
It was not Christine of course, but to have a woman treated him tenderly made his heart soften, slowly he felt, as though he was intoxicated, drunk in pleasure as the voices of agony were silenced. No longer did he feel the harsh glares and scorn from humanity, but the peace... all he felt was peace. As Death lowered Erik down into his coffin she knew he was not breathing before she checked. Slowly a tear lowered down her cheek as she thought of how cruel humanity was.
"Goodnight Erik," She whispered before she returned into the shadows of his room.
"Rest in peace..."