Disclaimer: The song Tourniquet by Evanescence doesn't belong to me, nor
does ::sniff sniff:: Severus Snape.
Tourniquet
"No! Master, please, nooooo..." Severus Snape's cries trail off as he realizes that the more he begged for mercy, the less mercy would be handed
down from the Dark Lord. Snape cursed the day that he received his Dark
Mark. He had just wanted somewhere to belong; the people at school had
always been so cruel.
i tried to kill my pain
but only brought more
A wave of red-hot agony sweeps over him, and another and then another. 'It
has begun.' Severus thinks grimly, refusing to scream. One by one, the
Death Eaters step forward and take turns delivering punishment to the
traitor, the spy. The Dark Lord laughs maliciously as he watches Snape thrash in pain. "You think I will kill you, don't you? But no, death would be a gift. You will recieve no gifts of mercy from me, traitor! Instead,
you will be left here to die of your pain."
i lay dying
and i'm pouring crimson regret
Severus moaned in agony as the aftermath of the Cruciatus began. He could
no longer see his surrounding as waves of red covered his vision.
and betrayal
He should never have joined the Dark Lord, but he was desperate for
friendship, for love. He thought he could find them there, but he was
wrong.
i'm dying
As he felt his life very slowly fading, he thought briefly on his parents.
Being Muggles, they would probably never hear of his death but think
instead that he was avoiding them. He felt a tear fall. They had never understood why he would want to be a wizard. They were devout Catholics, therefore believing magic was wrong. Through his pain, he felt for a moment
that maybe they were right.
praying
'Our Father, who art in heaven...', he began in his mind
bleeding
'hallowed be thy name...', he could feel blood dripping down his face, his
arm and his legs, blood everywhere.
and screaming
'thy Kingdom come, thy will be done....' he screamed, a sharp pain sweeping
over him.
am i too lost to be saved
'On earth as it is in Heaven.'
am i too lost?
"Give us this day our daily bread..." For the first time in his life he
wanted there to be a God, to love and forgive him.
my God my tourniquet
"And forgive us our trespasses..." so much to forgive.
return to me salvation
"As we forgive those who trespass against us..." to forgive Voldemort would be the most self-sacrificial thing he had ever done. Could he do it now?
my God my tourniquet
"Lead us not into temptation..." If only there had been a God to keep him
from the Dark Lord to begin with...
return to me salvation
"But deliver us from evil..." he was too weak to go on and faltered at the
last word. His last bits of life were slipping...
do you remember me
He wondered briefly if his muggle parents would understand what he had
done, if they were told?
lost for so long
He had come tonight without Dumbledore's knowledge, because he thought that
maybe, since Voldemort had owled him and not used the Mark, perhaps he would be privelege to some private information, something that would help
the cause.
will you be on the other side
His thoughts suddenly switched to Lily, the one girl he had loved. He had been there the night that she died, crying behind his mask as he was forced
to hold her down so she wouldn't fight.
or will you forget me
'If I see her on the other side, will she know? Does she know that I had
no choice?' he managed to think coherently before the pain claimed him
again.
i'm dying
As the agony claimed him again, he knew it would be the last time.
praying
"OH GOD!!! Save me..." he screamed and then trailed off as he took one last
breath.
bleeding
Slowly, as the wounds clotted, the blood stopped flowing.
and screaming
He had no more strength left for screams, but tried anyway, and his breath
caught on the blood that had filled his mouth.
am i too lost to be saved
The pain faded and he felt nothing, floated in nothing for what seemed like
an eternity.
am i too lost?
And then there was a light, too bright to ignore. He blinked to shake it
out of his eyes, and when he could see, he saw her walking towards him,
smiling. She understood.
my wounds cry for the grave
my soul cries for deliverance
will i be denied Christ
tourniquet
my suicide
The whole school mourned the day he was found. Their Potions Master, while
strict and sometimes cruel, had died fighting. Fighting for them. A remembrance was carved on the Slytherin table in the Great Hall, and it was
willingly signed by all.
does ::sniff sniff:: Severus Snape.
Tourniquet
"No! Master, please, nooooo..." Severus Snape's cries trail off as he realizes that the more he begged for mercy, the less mercy would be handed
down from the Dark Lord. Snape cursed the day that he received his Dark
Mark. He had just wanted somewhere to belong; the people at school had
always been so cruel.
i tried to kill my pain
but only brought more
A wave of red-hot agony sweeps over him, and another and then another. 'It
has begun.' Severus thinks grimly, refusing to scream. One by one, the
Death Eaters step forward and take turns delivering punishment to the
traitor, the spy. The Dark Lord laughs maliciously as he watches Snape thrash in pain. "You think I will kill you, don't you? But no, death would be a gift. You will recieve no gifts of mercy from me, traitor! Instead,
you will be left here to die of your pain."
i lay dying
and i'm pouring crimson regret
Severus moaned in agony as the aftermath of the Cruciatus began. He could
no longer see his surrounding as waves of red covered his vision.
and betrayal
He should never have joined the Dark Lord, but he was desperate for
friendship, for love. He thought he could find them there, but he was
wrong.
i'm dying
As he felt his life very slowly fading, he thought briefly on his parents.
Being Muggles, they would probably never hear of his death but think
instead that he was avoiding them. He felt a tear fall. They had never understood why he would want to be a wizard. They were devout Catholics, therefore believing magic was wrong. Through his pain, he felt for a moment
that maybe they were right.
praying
'Our Father, who art in heaven...', he began in his mind
bleeding
'hallowed be thy name...', he could feel blood dripping down his face, his
arm and his legs, blood everywhere.
and screaming
'thy Kingdom come, thy will be done....' he screamed, a sharp pain sweeping
over him.
am i too lost to be saved
'On earth as it is in Heaven.'
am i too lost?
"Give us this day our daily bread..." For the first time in his life he
wanted there to be a God, to love and forgive him.
my God my tourniquet
"And forgive us our trespasses..." so much to forgive.
return to me salvation
"As we forgive those who trespass against us..." to forgive Voldemort would be the most self-sacrificial thing he had ever done. Could he do it now?
my God my tourniquet
"Lead us not into temptation..." If only there had been a God to keep him
from the Dark Lord to begin with...
return to me salvation
"But deliver us from evil..." he was too weak to go on and faltered at the
last word. His last bits of life were slipping...
do you remember me
He wondered briefly if his muggle parents would understand what he had
done, if they were told?
lost for so long
He had come tonight without Dumbledore's knowledge, because he thought that
maybe, since Voldemort had owled him and not used the Mark, perhaps he would be privelege to some private information, something that would help
the cause.
will you be on the other side
His thoughts suddenly switched to Lily, the one girl he had loved. He had been there the night that she died, crying behind his mask as he was forced
to hold her down so she wouldn't fight.
or will you forget me
'If I see her on the other side, will she know? Does she know that I had
no choice?' he managed to think coherently before the pain claimed him
again.
i'm dying
As the agony claimed him again, he knew it would be the last time.
praying
"OH GOD!!! Save me..." he screamed and then trailed off as he took one last
breath.
bleeding
Slowly, as the wounds clotted, the blood stopped flowing.
and screaming
He had no more strength left for screams, but tried anyway, and his breath
caught on the blood that had filled his mouth.
am i too lost to be saved
The pain faded and he felt nothing, floated in nothing for what seemed like
an eternity.
am i too lost?
And then there was a light, too bright to ignore. He blinked to shake it
out of his eyes, and when he could see, he saw her walking towards him,
smiling. She understood.
my wounds cry for the grave
my soul cries for deliverance
will i be denied Christ
tourniquet
my suicide
The whole school mourned the day he was found. Their Potions Master, while
strict and sometimes cruel, had died fighting. Fighting for them. A remembrance was carved on the Slytherin table in the Great Hall, and it was
willingly signed by all.