Seamus Finnigan was sitting in the Great Dining Hall, doing his homework while eating a lizard leg, as usual. This Potions assignment was super difficult. He had to use the quadratic formula to come up with the right about of Ruhbabrb oil to put in his mixture. He sat there munching on the crispy lizard leg and sighed. It was at times like this when he felt lonely. He wished, from the bottom of his half-muggle heart that he had somebody….to love. But of course, no one EVER pays any attention to him because everyone is in love with Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived. More like The Boy Who Sucks thought Seamus. Suddenly, someone sat down next to him. It was Ron Wesly. He was wearing a maroon sweater, which as we all knew (due to his incesaant bickering of his bitch of a mother, Lisa Wesly) was his least favorite color. That bitch, Lisa, that fucking cunt. She always knit him maroon sweaters. I mean come on? This was one terrible mother. Always mixing up Frod and Jorge's names, not cleaning up the garden gnomes, and most shittily knitting Roon maroon sweaters. HE HATED FUCKING MAROON, LISA.
Anywayyyy, Ron also had glistening red hair. He threw his head back as he sat down next to Seamus, and it make a rainbow in the air. (I Love Lucy theme plays) Wow Seamus thought He is one Sexy Dude. He began to feel a wetness in his pants, Seamus that is. It was warm, sticky. He hadn't pissed himself, he had done that plenty iof times, and he knew what the felt like. This was something completely different. A whole new sensation of its own. Hot, white, sticky liquid dripped from the hem of his robes. The stain would remain, unnoticed by Ron and the others at the table… for know….
"Hey Seamus" Said ron in a extra hot and spicy way. like buffalo wings that are so hot that they make your nose feel spicy.
"hey" said seamus, stuttering. he hoped Ron didnt notice the stain of man-love on his pants. I mean, it wa qute the stain. Not just any, old stain. Not like the kind of stain one gets when they spill jam on themselves, no. It was a huge, wet, white, smelly stain. It smelled of the sea, of sweat… yet, sweet. Ron didnt. but someone else did. Someone not easily noticed by everyone else...someone like Seamus. They would have so much to talk about. Seamus didnt know it but they were already in l-o-v-e. He told himself, "No, it can't be true." He wanted to make sure that this love was truly pure, not like the kind he had had with that dirty professor… $Quirrell…. That name would forever ring in his ears, but that was a story for another time…. For now, he focused on the piping, hot red flamy mess of hair. Ron… oh, Ron Won.
However, his true love was staring at him from ron's shoulder. Little did he know that his anus would soon be aflame, not only of the red shcok of hair that was Roonil Waslib's… It would also flame of the monstrous raty cock of Sir. Scabbers.
I miss your boobs…. No! He couldn't think of $Quirrll. He musn't.
It was! Ron's Pet Rat! Scaffus!
Scabbers eyed Seamus so, so sexily. It made him want to undress and lay on a table and put sushi on his body and have scabbers eatthe sushi of off his naked, oily bod. Harry walked in, wearing his retarded, fucking owl costume. He just couldn't get over the death of his beloved owl, Hedgewick. He woire her corpse on his body. Everyone turned towards harry and the angels began to sing "somebody that i used to know". As much as he hated Harry for taking all the attention away from him, he had to admit! HARRY WAS SO FUK ING HAWT. His ass looked like it could take a cannon. Just the other night, he had a dream. He and Harry were walking down the corroridor and suddenly Harry pushed him against the wall and bit him on the kneck. then harry put his hand down Seamus's pants…...but now was not the time for fantisizing! he hated harry! he was taking away all the attention he rightly deserved.
However….while evryone was staring and harry, Ron's rat was looking right at Seamus the whole time. Finlaly, Seamus noticed the rodent making sexyeyes at him. At first he was… shocked. He had a certain racism towards rodents. But when he saw the humnaity in the rat's eyes…..he was a changed man. He was a democrat. The rat put his paw on Seamuses shoulder while Ron wasnt paying attention (because he was too busy lusting over The Boy Who Lived) and whispered in his ear with his sexy rat voice. "Meet me in the potions closet tonight at 9." he said.
SEamuses eye's widened with fear and arousal. what did this rat want?
Then the bell rang. Dinner time was over. Seamus walked out of the dining hall, feeling Scabber's glare burning holes in his ass.