Heartless Valentine's Day

'You were all the things I thought I knew, and I thought we could be…'

It was an hour until school and I woke up to the blaring sound of my noisy alarm clock that beautiful morning. The Daily Routine, and as usual my body unwillingly turned and my fist met the 'snooze' button followed by me lazily sitting up.

My world span but one confirmation sounded. It was Valentine's Day. The day when girls conveyed their feelings to the guys of their fancy. The day when there were only two out-comes: accept or reject. Both were frightening but I knew who I wanted to dedicate my love and affection to. Abarai Renji. He was different, as my friends said, but he was perfect in my eyes. Yet my inner shyness got the best of me. I know…shyness. Never thought the word existed in my vocabulary.

But nevertheless he was really popular for his confident character and had a fan club and admirers of his own. Today he would receive so many chocolates from others and he would probably eat them all or throw them out. Literally, they'd all be just chocolate to him, but I wanted mine to be special, something he will enjoy and love, something different. Anyone who ate that much chocolate would get sick and earn a horrible cavity. And then he'd have to go to the dentist and earn a massive bill just to fix it up. So as of last night, I decided that I would make him an obento. A good thing too for I was really good at cooking. Confirmed by my friends' compliments.

But the day I first realised my feelings for him was probably a year ago from today. No love, no boyfriend, nobody to offer my Valentine to. I was making my way home and walked past the 'rendezvous' of the soccer club. There, he was playing a fun game with his fellow players, passing the ball to his friends and dodging attackers. He was truly amazing; it was like he was flying on the soccer field and the adrenalin and happiness on his face just made my heart pound. Then when I saw him plaster a proud grin on his face when he scored, a feeling just so powerful surged through out me, making my face blush like crazy. For some reason, his happiness made me happy. His smile made me smile. I was never the type to go out and say 'Love at first sight' but maybe…just maybe, that cliché saying might actually be real.

But then again. He seemed really close to that Rukia girl I've heard about. They were just so close and friendly and happy, they were so natural in each others presence. I was just jealous of their relationship, so jealous I was disgusted in my self. And I hated it when I wanted to threaten her and tell her to stay away from him or do something really despicable. But I couldn't. I was just so considerate for him (as mush as I hated that aspect of my self). I'd rather see him happy with her than miserable with me or another. Can't believe I had just said that, but it was true.

Anyway, whatever, I could always just give it to him and if he didn't feel that same about me then…he didn't feel the same about me. And he could get a free meal as well. End of story.

So I crawled out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom with a towel in one hand and my uniform in the other. I quickly tuned the water and allowed the heat to trickle down my skin. I then snatched the shampoo/conditioner and lathered it into my hair. Leave in hair for one minute. In that time, taking the soap I scrubbed it into my body subsequently rinsing the bubbles and foam from my frame.

I swiftly turned off the water and dried off before slipping into the school uniform, the theme being grey that made my emerald eyes become more luminous. Taking the comb, I roughly brushed my dark ebony hair and allowed it to hang down my shoulders. And then for a last check up, I gazed into the mirror to have simple petite girl with green eyes and ivory skin stare back at me.

"Good Luck" I said to her, before leaving and heading straight for the kitchen.

An unconscious smile grew on my face as I slid down the stair railing, the short gush of air making my grin grow wider. I quietly walked to the kitchen, thoughtful to my sleeping family, and took an apron from the cabinet. "Let's begin"

---

"Hey, Saiyuri! Good Morning!" A voice called from behind me.

I turned and looked around to see who said that only to find my fast friend Orihime, the one who called out, with Tatsuki Arisawa stalking after her.

"Good Morning" I replied, thinking about the oblivious.

Heh, now that I think about it, I found it pretty funny when someone complimented me that I looked just like Inoue despite the body, eyes and hair colour, minus the clips.

"It's Valentine's Day today"

"Oh is it? I never knew." I replied sarcastically

"Do you have someone to give your chocolate to?"

I smugly ignored the question however my cheeks turned into a faint pink and mentally commented 'maybe'. Tatsuki released a light chuckle before dragging us inside the school. But very discretely as we passed the lockers, I slipped my present into Renji's cabinet.

Yet when I opened it, I saw that it was over-flowing with small boxes covered in cute wrapping paper. My eyes widened. How the hell was I going to fit this into there?! In an instant they fell, but the chocolates were scooped into my hands and shoved back into its place, my hand slamming the shaft closed. That was intense.

I figured that I'd have to pass on my valentine present to him some other way…maybe his desk! Oh. No. I don't even know where he sits. What kind of lover girl am I? Liking him for over a year and not even knowing where his seat is…or even his class. Ergh, this is pathetic.

I turned to face ahead but when Tatsuki shot me a diabolically smug grin, I knew what she was thinking. She had seen everything and she knew who I liked. Oh, hell's going to freeze over.

She went forward to me and terror shot through my body. I edged away, but she urged ahead. I took one step back and she stole two strides forward. We kept this up for what felt like hours but when my back met a wall, my life flashed right before my eyes. I went deeper into the wall but shivers arose and my skin crawled when I felt the barrier take an inhale.

The demoness's eyes widened for only an instant before she returned back to her evil form. "Hello Renji-san" she spoke in a fake innocent tone that could only be detected by my self and Inoue. That evil…Renji?! Where?!

I glanced to my left. Blank. To my right. Blank. Down below. Double blank. Up Above. …Red hair? Oh, Renji. There he was. And from my point of view he was upside down. Yet even from that angle I could tell he was wearing a confused face with an arched eye brow.

My stupid self took over as I smeared a confident grin on my lips and said to him "Hello Renji-san! I just have to say…"

He switched arched brows and waited for me to finish.

"You are seriously rock solid!" I could've burst out in laughter because his face was so priceless. Indescribable. Only one word came to my mind. Hilarious. Especially those of his friends.

My body turned to face him "I mean serious. Do you take steroids or something because you are really…you know!" I said whilst poking his middle. Iron Man.

I raised my head and gazed into his eyes. Obviously my cheeks would've blushed bright red but my arrogant attitude refused. He was still wearing his face, even while I shot him a teeth bearing smile. The red haired man was going to retort but when Rukia called out his name, he forgot about me and turned her way, running, practically sprinting after the woman.

A burning rage roared in my chest but saved by the bell, Tatsuki snatched me into class. Let the day begin! Bring it on…

---

It felt like an eternity until the final bell rang for the end of the day. About time! We were permitted to go home! I didn't hesitate to leave. I took my bag with homework and his obento and rushed to his locker. Yes, it was a bit late to give it to him now but I missed all the opportunities. Mainly because the ecstatic fan girls got in the way. And other times were when I was busy trying to get Orihime to give her chocolate to Ishida-san, who she has been admiring since…God knows how long.

But now was my moment, the school was practically empty and Renji had to stay back and do clean up duty. My plan was to wait for him to finish, put the obento on his bike when he came and then he could take it home with him and eat my meal, and then read my love letter dedicated to him. It was fool-proof. Perfect.

Step one: Waiting.

Pretty hard task seeing I was somewhat impatient, but for him I was willing. I glanced at my watch and saw it had only been a couple minutes since I arrived at the bike shelter. My eyes roamed each bike; labelling each colour, counting each one, then the wheels and finally staring off into the distance. I turned to my watch only to find it had been two minutes since the last time I had checked.

Damn this.

Time went slow as I waited there, even after the clouds went grey and the rain started to pour. But it was well worth it when I saw Renji's red hair in the distance. My hand grabbed his Valentine present as I delicately placed it on his bicycle seat. I then took off and hid behind the next bike shed to my right.

He had reached his mode of transportation and my heart thundered when I saw him pick up the little boxed lunch. Time froze for me. I couldn't help but feel butterflies in my stomach and a goofy smile on my face. He placed it under his wing and readied his bike. He then slowly rode off. I was so glad, he got my present. Now he can know of my feelings. Now he can-

My thoughts went blank as I saw him violently throw my present in the trash can.

Renji had just thrown my obento for him in the rubbish. Like it was a disgusting thing just a useless thing that didn't deserve to be in his presence. Why did you do that?

A pain so horrific surged through my chest. Like cold steel through my heart. I told myself that if he didn't like me then he didn't, but I wasn't expecting him to be that heartless. So cold.

My body went numb, and just like a zombie form, I stumbled to the bin. And like a stray cat that lost its way home, I scrapped the lunched box into my hands and cried my heart and soul out. Why? Why did you have to be so mean? I wanted you to know how I felt about you. I wanted to show you how much you meant to me. How much I needed you. Wanted you. Loved…you.

I ignored the shivers, the cold water, and the damp moisture making its way to my hair. But I noticed Renji from the corner of my eye. His gaze piercing through the raining curtain. His hair once tied, now loose and wet.

So with the obento in my hands, I crawled to him.

He flinched when I locked eye contact with him. But for some idiotic reason, I plastered a smile on my face. Obviously fake. And with an inch of my strength, I brushed a lock of his beautiful blood red hair to his side and choked "Renji Abarai…H-Happy Valentines Day".

I then slipped the lunch into his hands and whispered "Please enjoy my obento that I have specially made for you. I may not look as good looking but please…enjoy it"

And with that cliché out of the way, I brushed past him and made my way home. Successfully earning a broken heart, buckets of salty tears and a high fever.

'All this time you were pretending, so much for my happy ending…'