CIAO!

Sorry that I haven't been able to update ANY story except Rub Me On Your Butt (chuckle) but I've been real busy. My sister was in the hospital, band camp, and vacation. Also, I have to earn money so I can buy Breaking Dawn! Sweet Jesus, Its only about 2 weeks away! So... sorry to you all. This is a one shot that I created with my smartilicious brain. If anyone has heard of the band/TV show Flight Of the Concords... I got inspired by that. So, I don't own Twilight or the song. I own pie! YESS! (punches the air with a fit of glee) So, I shall give you a pie... if you review! Muahhahahahaa.

Emmett's POV

I hope this cheers him up, he has been feeling very down lately.

I walked into Jasper's room and turned off his music.

"What?" Jasper said annoyed.

"I just have something to say." I said.

I looked at my notebook and read the first thing.

"Your hair is good." I said to him.

"Huh?" Jasper said clearly confused.

"It's just a compliment for you. Your hair. Just a compliment about your hair being good."

"Oh... thank you." Jasper said suspiciously.

I looked at my notebook.

"And also I have another one here. Um. You're good at finding shortcuts around Forks."

"Oh... I appreciate that." Jasper said, his eyebrow up.

"Would it be gay to write you a song... to cheer you up?"

"Uh... I guess not."

I got my guitar out from under his bed and strumed a chord.

"It's called 'Jazzy, you got it going on.'"

"Hey there Jaz,
I see you're looking down.
Don't wanna see my little buddy down with a frown,
Just because I get more women than you,
Well that's only because they don't know you like I do.
Sure you weedy, and kinda shy,
But some girly out there must be needy for a weedy shy guy,
They want you as they needle when they're rolling in the hay,
So just hear me out when I say...
Jaz you got it going on!
The ladies'll get to know your sexuality when they get to know your personality.
I said Jaz you got it going ooon!
Not in a gay way, just in a "hey man I wanted to say that your looking ok man!"
Why can't a heterosexual guy tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly?
Not all the time obviously, Just when he's got a problem with his self-esteem.
Don't let anyone tell you you're not humpable,
Because you're bumpable,
Well I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable,
If I say you got a "boom ow ow" come on Jaz help me out now.
Jaz you got it going on!
(Got it going on)
That's the conclusion that I've come to,
But that doesn't mean that I wanna Bum you.
Jaz you got it going ooon!
(Got it going on...)
No doubt about it we'd be going crazay if one of us was lucky enough to be born a lady.
OH, if one of us was a lady!
And I was your man, if I was your man.
Well sometimes It gets lonely and I ne-ed a woman,
And then I imagine you with some bosoms.
In fact, one time when we were all alone and I was feeling really lonely,
And we were sharing that room in Alaska,
I put a wig on you while you were knocked out, put a wig on you.
And I just lay there and spooned you.
Jaz, you got it going on."

Jasper looked... confused.

"So..." I began saying, "Hopefully that made you feel better."

"Can I please have a look at the lyrics?" He asked me.

I handed my notebook with all the lyrics and stuff that supposed to make him feel better.

"This is one of your creepy songs man." Jasper said staring at the notebook.

"In what way?" I asked him.

"What's that about, uh, 'sometimes I put A wig on you when were alone?"

"Put a wig on you? No..." I shook my head, "It didn't say anything like that."

"Well, that's a definitely bit gay."

"What is?"

"Putting a wig on me while I'm knocked out."

"I think sometimes you hear what you want to hear," I began, "It wouldn't be gay to put a wig on a man and pretend they're a woman. How could that be gay if you're pretending they're a woman? Not that I did it."

Also, here is the link were Flight Of The Concords sings it. (Giggle-Snort)

www . youtube . com/watch?vh2LpeA3jcEU