Disgaea Scripted
A Love Most Vile
Author's Note: In order to be cheap and lazy, I present a fanfic written in script format in hopes of disappointing, disgusting and down right making you feel insulted! Naturally I'm kidding. I've written it this way because a script feels natural for Disgaea and since this is mostly gag, I'm not putting a ton of effort into this. Just weird things that pop up into my head now in written format. Enjoy the brain juice!
Prinny: Rumor! Rumor! I've heard an unbelievable rumor today dood!
Almaz: Oh, a prinny. What's he talking about?
Raspberyl: He's talking about rumors and gossiping is a bad habit. As a delinquent I cannot approve. Shall we beat him up?
Almaz: And rough housing is a delinquent solution to all this? Why don't we hear him out? Could be important.
Sapphire: And if it isn't can we blow him up?
Almaz: I guess. That's what they're designed for.
Prinny: Overlord Mao...he has a girlfriend!
Everyone(including the prinny and a possessed doorknob): Eeh?!
Almaz: Wait, why are you reacting to your own rumor?
Prinny: We Prinnies are desperate to feel involved in things.
Raspberyl: A girlfriend? Now that is a rumor!
Sapphire: I have to agree, Mao doesn't seem like someone who would fall in love. Or even be gentle.
Almaz: That's a bit suggestive. But how do you know about this?
Prinny: People have been seeing him with a girl for the past week!
Raspberyl: We haven't seen a lot of him this week have we?
Almaz: It's been a week and you haven't noticed he was gone?!
Raspberyl: We're demons. We live for eons. Time is nothing to us.
Almaz: What a waste.
Raspberyl: Now, instead of snooping around and dancing around the issue, let's just head to his house and ask.
Almaz: A logical solution.
Sapphire: And if he denies it we can torture the information out of him.
Almaz: There goes my last attempt at normality.
Mao: Are you ready?
Conveniently shadowed girl:....
Raspberyl: Well, this is surprising. Mao's actually got a girlfriend.
Almaz: Interesting? Somehow I think that's an understatement.
Sapphire: Quite so Almaz. Who would put up being with him at such an intimate level?
Almaz: Not exactly what I meant Princess...
Mao: Silence! There's a reason people whisper things like this.
Raspberyl: Aww, are you embarrassed now that everyone knows you are capable of love?
Mao: L-l-l-love?! You...you imbecile! This is not love, this relationship is based on the most putrid, vile, malevolent emotions any demon can feel.
Sapphire: Disappointment?
Mao: Disappointment? Are, are you kidding me?! Of all the foul emotions to choose you picked that?
Raspberyl: Cut the chatter. Whose the girl Mao? We wanna meet her.
Almaz: Yeah, we're all really curious who she is.
Mao: Heh, my girlfriend is a special person indeed. So special she can't be obtained through normal means. With the littlest effort she has built a cult of mindless slaves to worship her and fight for her at the drop of a pin. I present to you, the girlfriend of the Overlord! Ahahahahaha!!!
Plenair:......
Almaz: No way! Isn't she the Class Representative NPC?
Raspveryl: I've heard in other NetherWorlds she can take you to the Dark Assembly. She even works for a popular news station in a place called Veldime.
Pleinair:....
Alamz: Is she going to say anything?
Mao: You fool! Eternal speechlessness is one of her many charms. If you were like me you'd be able to read the thousand signs of body language she just emitted to express herself.
Almaz: A thousand?! Wow, she must have high speed.
Mao: And good HIT ratings too. She's great with guns.
Sapphire: I'm surprised you're dating such a person. Then again you do quite a lot of talking yourself so her being quiet must bring balance to your relationship.
Mao: She also sends a horrifying aura almost constantly. It excites me to no end with her creepy ways and assassin like nature.
Almaz: I don't think it's safe for an Overlord to be dating someone with assassin like qualities.
Mao: You keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Almaz: By turning potential murderers into your girlfriend?
Mao: Shut up! I don't have to justify my relationship to you. I'll go ahead and say how I feel. I love Pleinair!
Sapphire: OOC!! He's out of character! We have to stop him Alamz!
Almaz: He does seem to be a bit different. Should we fight him? Since we're the main characters in this cutscene that means he'll definitely be weaker right? Let me see....nope, he's still level 9999. All stats pushing on a billion.
Mao: You didn't let me finish. Our love is an evolved form of love, a love especially for demons. It's a combination of chaos, fear, power, lust and overall wickedness! The affection and romance from this kind of hellish love is satanically delicious!
Champloo: Boom!
Almaz: What an evil love!
Raspberyl: Wow. I'm impressed. Either you're bluffing to such a degree that you're making the school founders cry with pride or...you've really made a dangerous discovery Mao.
Mao: Look in your demon heart and you know the answer.
Raspberyl: Indeed I do. Well, I think it's high time we leave these two lovebirds off to their pecking.
Sapphire: I suppose so. They probably have a lot of hateful things to say to each other, which I assume you demons do.
Almaz: Princess, let's not dive too much into the world of demon romance. Human love is plenty good without its corruption. See ya later Mao.
Mao: So long subordinates!
Mao: Now that they're gone it's probably time we head over to that new restaurant you wanted to go to right?
Pleinair:....
Mao: What? You don't wanna go? Are you feeling okay?
Pleinair:...
Mao: Did I mean what I said about being in love with you?
Pleinair:....
Mao: Gah! You know how I feel, why must you make me say it?!
Pleinair:....!
Mao: Fine! Curse you, you wretched woman!....I love you! There, are you pleased with yourself?! You've corrupted an Overlord.
Pleinair:....
Mao: Then again severely denying one's feelings for their girlfriend in public could be considered sorta fiendish can't it?
Pleinair:....
Mao: I don't go around making any excuse to be good! What a heinous accusation!
Pleinair:....
Mao: Go inside and watch a movie? If that's what you wanna do then.
Pleinair:....
Mao: I'll go get something real good then. You coming?
Pleinair:....
Mao: Alright then. Just shoot at the Prinnies if you need anything. See ya.
Pleinair:....
Pleinair: I love you too.
Author's Note: It's weird, this is mostly gag and humor but this couple might actually work, at least in my distorted vulgar perspective. I wouldn't do a oneshot about them and it's definitely on the bottom of my list. Heck, there's a bigger chance of me working on a Etna x Hanako fanfic then this and that's basically loli x superloli. Then again, you never know.