Murphy held 10k's chin while he inspected the cuts and bruises on his face. The Blends who had captured him let him know with their fists and their boots exactly what they thought of ungrateful traitors who dared to deny their savior's love.
10k stared at the cell wall so hard he was surprised he hadn't bored a hole through it yet. Refusing to speak or look at his captor were the only rebellions he had left in him. He focused on the wall with everything he had left to keep himself from being sucked into the constant sea of voices in his head beckoning him to "Love Murphy. Trust Murphy. Obey Murphy."
The pull was much stronger than when he left. Back then Murphy's influence was more like a dull buzzing, like the static from a radio station that was not quite in tune. He could pretend he wasn't really hearing it. But now it was a full blown chorus blasting the gospel of Murphy. 10k wasn't sure, but he thought Murphy was getting more powerful with every new Blend he created.
It had been almost a week since his last booster shot. Weakened from both malnutrition and the recent beating, 10k could barely stand at attention. He was a wreck: battered, dirty, his tattered black coveralls practically falling off his body. And here Murphy was, looking like a king in his fancy tailored suit, lording over him and everyone else in his new castle. 10k didn't have to see Murphy's face to know that he loved every minute of this. He probably couldn't wait to test out his new dungeon.
10k knew there was no hope of escape. Especially not with the two armed Blends waiting outside the prison cell. But even if he ran away again, where would he go? There was no place left for him anymore. The battle now was to keep his head above water. 10k knew just one moment of lapsed concentration and he could drown.
"This…was not what I wanted." Murphy released his chin. "The ones who mistreated you have been dealt with."
10k snorted derisively but didn't respond.
And who will deal with you?
"My apologies for the accommodations, but I have to be careful. You are quite the escape artist!" Murphy chuckled and wagged his finger at him. "My people searched for you for weeks. I'm actually shocked to see you back."
"Let me guess. You couldn't find Warren?" Murphy scrutinized his face carefully while he paced the small room. 10k stared at a crack on the far wall. He pretended it was a tiny venomous snake that would bite Murphy the second he stepped near it. "No. That's not it. You're like a bloodhound. You definitely found the others. Did she send you here to spy on me?"
The imaginary snake reared its head and hissed. Just a little closer…
"Or maybe…maybe she learned you're one of mine now and she cast you out?" 10k clenched his jaw angrily and looked down at the floor.
Shut up. I'm not one of yours.
"Ah. So that's it." Murphy laughed. "Kid, did anyone ever tell you that you have a terrible poker face?" 10k winced away from his touch when Murphy clapped his cheek. He wished he could melt into the wall behind him.
"Jesus, relax! I am not going to hurt you." Murphy motioned one of his guards into the cell. She had a pitcher of water and a tray of food in her hands. 10k was so dehydrated and starved that the very sight of it made him woozy. The smell of the fresh baked bread – something he had not tasted in years – almost brought tears to his eyes.
The voices in his head beseeched him to accept Murphy's gifts, because he's the savior and he loves all his children. He was ashamed of the part of him that was exhausted and wanted to give in. It would be so easy to join Murphy. He wouldn't have to suffer anymore. He wouldn't feel so alone. But 10k shrugged off the voices and made himself focus again.
Pa said a man could live a few weeks without food, but only a few days without water. If I can just hold out a little longer this could all be over soon. Better to die on my own terms than live the rest of my life as his slave.
"My people tell me you've been refusing to eat or drink. That won't do." Murphy grabbed the handle of the metal pitcher. "I have plans for you, my young friend. So you need to keep your strength up." He signaled his guard to set the tray in the corner.
10k pressed his back against the wall to get as far away as possible, but he knew it was futile. There was no place to hide. Not from him.
Murphy stepped forward. He tucked the pitcher handle into the boy's hand and gently but firmly forced his fingers around it. 10k could feel the condensation of the cool water beading along the side of the pitcher drip against his hand. His dry mouth ached at the thought of how good it would feel to finally quench his thirst after the last few torturous days.
No. No. Please, no…
"Drink."
Murphy's command punched through 10k's defenses like a bullet through a paper target. Disgusted with himself, 10k slid down the wall like a boneless thing to sit helplessly at Murphy's feet. Not for first time and not for the last time, his own body betrayed him as he swallowed down the water as fast as he could, drenching himself as the water splashed forth from the mouth of the pitcher while he gulped and gulped.
Murphy patted him on the head as he drank. "Yes. Yes. That's my good boy."
Please, please, God… don't let me drown.
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