Disclaimer: Neither Tsubasa nor its characters belong to me, and I make no profit from the writing of these terrible things. Please don't sue me, as any such attempts will be met in hilarious failure-I have nothing.
Ashura-o stitched his magic into my skin, and soothed over my body with his hands, whispering illusory comforts. It hurt-it hurt so much, but I always knew that there would be pain. I tried to smile now that I knew how, I tried to accept this, to atone for my sins. Ashura-o said he didn't want me to become too strong, that he could save me and I wanted to believe him, but I knew deep down that I was doubly if not triply cursed, at birth and again and again since. My very life has never been anything but sin.
Ashura-o is the only strength I've ever known, the only one who has shown me kindness. I wish that Fai had known him. With one hand Ashura-o stroked my hair, and the other,- the other moved lower, roving over my exposed back and sensitive sides, stinging me with 1000 pinpricks of poison. I cringed and gripped the satin sheets of Ashura-o's bed with white knuckles, and he muttered about how strong I was, how glad he was that I'm His and how, though he could have always found me before, now instead of as a moth to flame, he would know me as his own right hand.
I was surprised to hear my own whimpers, to feel tears I'd thought eternally frozen break free and stain my face.
"The pain feels good, doesn't it Fai?"
I nodded my head and allowed the cries to choke out of my throat with abandon.
"You're so beautiful Fai, and you're all mine."
I writhed against Ashura-o's lap then, begging him to stop, to please stop, his spell hurt and it felt so good and I just couldn't bear another second of it. Ashura-o's fingers traced the tip of my spine, my tailbone, a gossamer flicker against my small bottom, and he was done.
The spell pushed its way through me, marking down into my bones, and tears of relief splashed from my eyes and Ashura-o pulled me to his chest, running his hands over me easing the pain away. His hair fell across us both, cascading over my chest as he held me rocking to his. I turned around in his lap and threw my arms round his neck, burying my face in his hair, pressed closely to his heart.
Ashura-o kissed the top of my head and said, "I knew I would find you, and I knew that you'd save me one day, but I never thought that I would love you."
When I woke I was still in Ashura-o's huge bed, but I was all alone.