The Sad Army Man
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The sad army man met an old friend one day
While walking around half-past eight.
The friend said to him, "John, I know a man
Who's searching for a new roommate."
.
"Who'd want me for a roommate?" said the sad army man.
"I'm boring and not very giving."
"His name's Sherlock Holmes," said the friend to the man,
"And he solves homicides for a living."
.
The sad army man went to meet Sherlock Holmes
At the hospital known as St. Bart's.
He deduced who John was just by looking at him,
And that's how the friendship did start.
.
Together they fell right into adventure;
It didn't take very much time.
With taxis and gun wounds and mind games and murders,
The two friends solved every crime.
.
The sad army man came to like his new friend,
Though everyone else called him mad.
The light crept back to the army man's eyes,
And the sad army man became glad.
.
The glad army man and the madman detective
Amazed everyone that they met.
They solved every murder and caught every crook,
But there was one they had not caught yet.
.
Word came 'round to the best friends' ears
Of a villain named Moriarty.
"He wants me to die," Sherlock said with a grin.
"I'll have to invite him to tea."
.
Moriarty could be clever—almost as much
As the madman detective could.
He made it his goal that before he died,
He'd end Sherlock Holmes for good.
.
He sent Sherlock a letter to come to the roof
Of the hospital as quick as he can.
"Don't try any tricks," the letter did read,
"Or I'll murder your glad army man."
.
"We're both quite alike," said Moriarty
As Sherlock approached him on the roof.
"You're a consulting detective; I'm a consulting criminal.
Let's see if you're bulletproof."
.
"I've invited your friend, that glad army man,
To witness our little show."
Sherlock looked down, and indeed he could see
John Watson just down below.
.
"What do I need to do," he asked,
"To save my best friend's life?"
"Take your own," Moriarty said.
"And I promise I'll keep him alive."
.
Sherlock looked down at the busy street road
And locked eyes with his glad army friend.
He stepped to the edge of the hospital ledge,
Knowing his days would now end.
.
The glad army man had tears in his eyes
As he watched the madman detective
Fall, fall, fall through the wind
And slam into the pavement destructive.
.
...
.
The sad army man stood at Sherlock Holmes's grave,
Praying one last final prayer.
"Please don't be dead. I need one more miracle.
I need you here, right there."
.
But, alas, he could not, the sad army man knew,
And he turned away, shaking his head.
"It's all over, all over," the sad army man cried.
"My best friend, Sherlock Holmes, is dead."