BATMAN: THE DRUNKEN DARK KNIGHT RETURNS
A black haze covered the city of Gotham. might we call it-an evil haze? Possibly. But
what could be known for certain was that evildoings were going on beneath the crescent
moon.
At Wayne Manor, or whatever it is referred to, Bruce Wayne(Batman) slept calmly in his
huge bed, in his huge room, in his huge house. It had been a long day and even though
it was only seven pm, bruce was exhausted. Plus, he had just downed two six-packs.
Without warning, his Bat-beeper went off. Awaking in a state of surprise, he staggred
over to it. Oh no! There was a terrorist attempt going on at Wayne Enterprises! It looked
like it was up to Batman to save the innocent hostages from disaster.
"Alfed!! Hold me calls! i'm going to be out, uh, on the town!!" muttered Bruce to a lamp
as he tripped headfirst down the stairs and crashed on the floor.
Stumbling almost blindly around the room, he finally managed to trip the secret clock
switch and open the secret entrance. Losing grip on the Bat-pole, he tumbled down the
hole into the Bat-cave. As he groped wildly to pull on his costume, Alfred, the butler, and
the only other person loving in that big, lonely house, entered.
"Master Bruce, I doubt it would be a good idea to try to save those hostages while you're
drunk! I'd suggest allowing the police handle this one."
"Oh, you're always full of shit Alfred," said Batman to the wall as he tossed another six-
pack into the passenger seat of the Bat-mobile. It was a good thing Robin had died
previously. now there was more room in the Bat-mobile for booze.
As he stuck his Bat-key into the Bat-mobile, Batman rolled up the driver's side Bat-
window and gave a final wave to Alfred. Then he acceidentally ran over the old man.
"Fuck! Left it in reverse! Silly me."
A black haze covered the city of Gotham. might we call it-an evil haze? Possibly. But
what could be known for certain was that evildoings were going on beneath the crescent
moon.
At Wayne Manor, or whatever it is referred to, Bruce Wayne(Batman) slept calmly in his
huge bed, in his huge room, in his huge house. It had been a long day and even though
it was only seven pm, bruce was exhausted. Plus, he had just downed two six-packs.
Without warning, his Bat-beeper went off. Awaking in a state of surprise, he staggred
over to it. Oh no! There was a terrorist attempt going on at Wayne Enterprises! It looked
like it was up to Batman to save the innocent hostages from disaster.
"Alfed!! Hold me calls! i'm going to be out, uh, on the town!!" muttered Bruce to a lamp
as he tripped headfirst down the stairs and crashed on the floor.
Stumbling almost blindly around the room, he finally managed to trip the secret clock
switch and open the secret entrance. Losing grip on the Bat-pole, he tumbled down the
hole into the Bat-cave. As he groped wildly to pull on his costume, Alfred, the butler, and
the only other person loving in that big, lonely house, entered.
"Master Bruce, I doubt it would be a good idea to try to save those hostages while you're
drunk! I'd suggest allowing the police handle this one."
"Oh, you're always full of shit Alfred," said Batman to the wall as he tossed another six-
pack into the passenger seat of the Bat-mobile. It was a good thing Robin had died
previously. now there was more room in the Bat-mobile for booze.
As he stuck his Bat-key into the Bat-mobile, Batman rolled up the driver's side Bat-
window and gave a final wave to Alfred. Then he acceidentally ran over the old man.
"Fuck! Left it in reverse! Silly me."