The blond nin stood in front of the memorial, staring down at the names that were embossed into the grey stone. It's been so many years since they've passed, and he still missed them — her.
It wasn't so hard for him to miss his loved one. Just one small, tiny action that made him remember the other, the man would break. It would take ages to fix the man – days, weeks, months, years, decades... a century.
He tilted his chin up, facing the sky with his blue eyes. He felt his hair tickling his cheeks as a wind danced by. It was the warm wind of spring, the season where he confessed to her, giving her a rose, reminding her how much he had loved her.
He could hear her voice, calling out to him, telling him to stop eating ramen. He could feel his son's arms wrap around his long legs, whining him to feed him some ramen. He could see his wife growing angrier by the second. He could smell the flowers that lingered on the window ledge.
"Hello?" A voice stopped him from breaking.
The man looked behind his shoulder, cracking a smile as he recognised the man. "Kakashi."
The silver haired nin stood by the other, tucking his hands into his pockets as he sighed, "visiting them again?"
"Of course, it's his birthday anyway." The man replied, glancing towards the Jounin. "Why are you here?"
Kakashi lowered himself into a squat, placing a white rose above the engraved name of his friend, "visiting."
The man only nodded, avoiding pushing the subject any further. He watched the man stand up as he shut an eye before tapping the same eye with his forefinger. "What?"
"He gave me this before he went away." He replied, lowering his hand, running it down the length of his arm. "I feel so sick – like I've been struck with a disease." He paused, glancing up at the sky, watching a cloud past by, "all this fighting, all the pain, all the crying... it has to stop eventually, right?" He continued, raising his arm up well over his head, spreading his hand open to conjure his Raikiri — a softer Raikiri.
"I think so, too." The other nodded, "all the fighting is full of malice... and fear... and doubt." He paused; reaching up to wrap his fingers around Kakashi's wrist, ending the Jutsu, "at least we have a breather."
Kakashi glanced over at the man, his eyes curving upwards into small crescents as he lowered his arm, "yeah, a breather." A pause, then a sigh, "but for how long? How long must we wait?"
"Wait for what?" The man asked.
"To be with them."
Kakashi left after the sun had settled, but the man stayed.
"It's all my fault." He started, "I was too slow. I was too slow to save you all." He paused, squatting down to graze his fingers over a name. "I have no idea how all of you are going to forgive me – you died when you were eighteen. You were so, so young to die."
"You didn't know anything about the world. You didn't manage to fulfil your dream –" A short laugh as tears dropped onto cold, pale fingers, battered from a fight, "– you kept shouting out that dream of yours, I still wonder how your voice can be so loud." He paused, feeling a presence behind him.
"You didn't get to protect Kakashi." He continued, feeling Kakashi's rough fingers graze along his tense shoulders, "you loved him so much that you ended up living with him for more than a week – and you telling me that you were protecting him."
A strong silence filled the air, but Kakashi cut it off. "I came to pick you up." The silver haired man said as he felt his fingers intertwine with the latter's. "Tsunade is worried about you."
"Why is she worried about me?" A strain in his voice
"I am the Rokudaime," Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes at him, "and you are my mentor, did you forget already?" He paused, "I can't have you making me worried about you."
The man laughed, wiping at his tear-stained face. Kakashi pulled up the man, feeling the man's stressed muscles. "Have you been eating?"
A subtle nod ended the topic in a second, and started another round of silence. It wrung in the air as they walked back to Kakashi's office. The sound of several kids running after the Rokudaime made the man cringe. His son would have been part of the barrage of kids. If only he had been quicker. If only he could.
Dad, why can't you be happy?
The man blinked as he was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts. He averted his eyes towards the silver haired nin, unable to resist the falter in his heart beat as he saw the Rokudaime standing at the edge of the cliff with his front facing the village.
Kakashi's hair was moving in the wind as he closed his eyes, feeling the wind caress him. His chin was tilting towards the orange-red sky; lips parted as he spoke softly. A soft lullaby, sung by the latter's wife, escaped from the man's mouth. The words spoke of love, a family.
The latter walked up to him, wrapping his arms around the pale man's build. He felt the muscles tense against his sudden hold. Burying his face into the middle of Kakashi's back, he asked, "why am I not happy?"
The Jounin sighed, biting his lip as he thought of an answer, "its not that you aren't happy… its just that you miss them. There's a difference between the two."
"I know there is a difference." The other huffed, expelling warm air onto Kakashi's back, making the Rokudaime shiver. "I just… I want to be happy, but I don't know how to be – how can you be happy after killing –"
"Please don't mention her." Kakashi heard his voice shake. "I've gone living for a decade without remembering what I had done. Don't make me break that streak."
"Sorry." The man apologised as he removed his arms from Kakashi, "haven't you got work to do?"
Kakashi nodded, "I have an S-rank mission, so I should get going now –"
"An S-rank mission? –" He started to ask, but he was cut off when Kakashi left in a hurry, leaving specks of dust as he jumped off the edge of the cliff, running towards the gate. He ran up to the edge, watching the silver-haired nin run towards the gate. "After all this time… he still goes on missions?"
That was his promise, dad.
The man sucked in a handful of air as the hair on the back of his neck stand up. Feeling a bright and warm chakra next to him, he refrained himself from crying.
Aka-chan made a promise to protect the village. The disembodied voice told him, he said that he would fill in when the village was in a desperate situation, but I guess he wanted to help Konoha even further – because that's how he is.
The man couldn't help but laugh, "yeah, well – shouldn't you be living with that?" He looked towards the boy who bore a strong resemblance to his mother.
Don't go there. The boy pouted, just don't.
The man laughed again, but it suddenly died when he felt another presence on the other side.
How's Kakashi-kun? The other person asked, a subtle smile forming on her face.
"He's doing okay, he's fit to be Hokage." The man nodded faintly, copying the smile on his wife's face.
That's good to hear, right, Mum? The boy leaned forward, looking towards the mother who nodded in return; anyway, I gotta go now, Dad. Pervy-sage is waiting very impatiently. Then the boy disappeared into the wind, wrapping itself around the man before leaving.
He's still growing. His wife sighed; I just wish he would stop easting ramen.
"It's partly my fault –"
EXCUSE YOU – IT'S YOUR ENTIRE FAULT.
"Okay, okay! It's all my fault." He snapped his hands in front of him, sweating furiously as his wife loomed at him. "Anyway, you should get going, Kushina, you wouldn't want to hear Naruto's whinging."
ARGH. YOU'RE RIGHT. His wife pulled at her hair, he would whine for a~ges. She paused; looking towards her husband, take care of everyone, all right? And please, be happy that you get to live on to tell Naruto's story,
Minato nodded, watching his wife dispel into the wind. A melodious lullaby accompanied him as he stayed standing at the edge, watching the children of Konoha run around the village, laughing like there's no tomorrow.
"I promise to protect the kings of Konoha, and I promise to be happy. After all, I am Namikaze Minato, the yellow flash of Konoha."