A/N: OHAYO READER-CHAN XD. THIS IS MY FANFICTION, NEEE~~~? Read it out loud, daijoubu? That wasn't even close to proper Japanese.
In Hawaii, there are giant spiders. Like, really giant spiders. Spiders the size of your fist. Try not to think about it. Anyway, Lilo and Stitch live in Hawaii. Where there are giant bugs. Have I mentioned the centipedes? Yeah, there are centipedes, too. Giant ones. Giant poisonous ones.
One day, Madoka Kaname was in biology class at her school which I forget the name of because I saw that anime like two years ago. She was studying with her friends Sayaka and Homura and Mami. It's a miracle I just remembered their names. I've spent like two years calling them "yellow madoka" and "purple madoka" and stuff. Anyway, they were all in biology class, and the teacher was teaching them about bugs.
"I am here to teach you about bugs," said the teacher. And she did. They learned so much about bugs. I'm getting itchy just thinking about all of their bug knowledge.
After class, they were walking through the hallway, chatting about all of their mad knowledge.
"So bugs, right?" said Sayaka. "Bugs are cool."
There was general agreement. Even Homura took a break from being stony-faced and cool to nod her head slightly.
"You know where they have giant freaking bugs?" asked Sayaka. "Hawaii. Hawaii has really giant, poisonous bugs. I think we should go."
And so they did. They just happened to find a cheap flight to Hawaii leaving that very same night. The magic of fanfiction. Also, all of their parents were okay with it (except for Homura, who inexplicably has no parents). They boarded the flight with full luggage, unconcerned about missing a week of school around exam time. Sooo magical.
They touched down in Hawaii after a boring plane flight I don't feel like describing. They claimed their baggage and stepped outside into the world of Hawaii. I can't really describe Hawaii very well, because I've never actually been there. I do know that they have giant bugs, though, have I mentioned that?
"This wasn't supposed to happen. It's a breach in the timeline," said Homura, squinting into the sun.
"Hahaha, oh Homura. My good friend Homura. You say the craziest things, friend," said Madoka, laughing animely.
"Make a contract with me, and become a magical girl!" said Kyubey, who was also there. In Hawaii. He was on the beach, which is also the airport. I can make it that way because I've never been to Hawaii. Anyway, Kyubey was there on the beach, little flowered shirt, sunglasses, even one of those drinks with the tiny umbrellas in it.
Homura picked him up and threw him into the sea. Madoka gasped.
"That was cruel!"
Homura nodded.
"He'll be back."
"Make a contract with me, and become a magical girl!"
He was back.
"I feel this deep, tugging feeling in my heart," said Sayaka, looking whimsically into the distance. "Almost like we need to meet someone named Lilo, and someone named Stitch."
"I feel like that would advance the plot significantly," said Mami. She was here too. She just hadn't spoken for some reason.
Homura threw Kyubey back into the sea, and they took off running down the beach. Except they were all still in their school clothes and they got sand all in their shoes and it was literally the worst feeling ever. Except for maybe, say, getting your head chopped off.
Mami sneezed.
They were somehow drawn to this house, on the edge of the rainforest. It was a really cool rainforest, but it was probably also full of GIANT BUGS. Like, SCORPIONS. Do you know what happens if you're stung by a giant scorpion? Death. Death is what happens.
Homura was getting really antsy, trying to protect Madoka from not just Kyubey, but also death by GIANT FRIGGIN SCORPION.
"I think we should go into that house," she said. "It seems sheltered from both bugs and evil incubator hellspawn."
"We can't just walk into someone's house," said Madoka in an anime tone.
"We should try to knock on the door," said Sayaka, who, now that she was in Hawaii, realized that maybe bugs weren't all that cool and they were actually just the worst.
"I agree," said Mami.
The four walked up to the door, past about fifty GIANT SPIDERS, and then knocked. A little girl answered. She was Lilo. I don't want to describe her. Google it if you really don't know. And then watch the movie. It was quite enjoyable. Rotten tomatoes says "Edgier than traditional Disney fare, Lilo and Stitch explores issues of family while providing a fun and charming story." If you needed some good critical endorsement.
"Hello?" said Lilo.
"Hello," said Madoka. "We just arrived here by plane, and we noticed that you have a house that probably doesn't have GIANT SPIDERS in it."
"They're everywhere," whispered Lilo. "Everywhere."
"Oh, well, sorry to bother you then," said Madoka.
"You can still come inside, if you'd like," said Lilo, who apparently had never been taught stranger danger in this story.
"That would be lovely," said Mami, who also was never taught to not inflict stranger danger on tiny children. God dangit Mami. Get your head in the game.
They walked into the house, which had admittedly less spiders than the outdoors.
"So, why do you all look so anime?" asked Lilo, as they walked.
"Why do you look so Disney?" asked Sayaka.
"Point taken."
They sat down together in Lilo's living room. It was kind of awkward, to be honest. Why had she even invited them in in the first place?
Suddenly, a little blue monster crawled in on the ceiling. It was Stitch. Again, google it if you are some sort of Disney recluse.
"This is Stitch," said Lilo, smiling and pointing at him. He dropped down to the floor with an impressive 180. Nice one, Stitch. You the man.
He lifted three tiny blue paws and waved at them.
"Hi," he said, in the Stitch voice. If the person reading this is not currently doing the Stitch voice, then they are not properly representing my artistic masterpiece.
"She sells sea shells by the seashore," said Stitch. "Toy boat toy boat toy boat."
Lilo clucked her tongue at him.
"Now you're just being cruel to our kind reader friend."
Stitch looked ashamed of himself.
Suddenly, Kyubey crawled in. Also on the ceiling. He was commanding an army of about twelve giant spiders.
And then they went home. My brother said he'd make me cookies if I posted this. So I am. I'm probably going to have to reset my fanfiction password because I don't remember it anymore. My profile is also embarrassing. Everyone please do not read this.
