Hey readers... I know, I know... My stories have been getting so pervy lately. Well, that's not my fault. Anyway, I'm sorry that I haven't done a lot of writing as of late... I've been busy with work and what not. Anyway, if this story doesn't seem complete, it was an idea that dried up on me halfway through. But, I slaved over a hot keyboard for several hours to write this. I didn't want to delete it and I wanted to get it posted before something happens and I lose it. So, without further ado, Enjoy.
"So tell me again", said Applejack, "Why are we going to a strip club?" She wasn't happy about being dragged along to Ponyville's new strip bar, Celestial Playground, but Twilight Sparkle had gotten some free VIP passes from Princess Celestia, the bar's owner, so she decided she would tag along.
"Aww, c'mon AJ", said Pinkie Pie, "It'll be fun."
Twilight showed the bouncer, who was one of Celestia's guards, the VIP passes she was given and the guard let them right in.
The six walked into the bar, looking all of the different dancers. There were both mares and stallions dancing around poles.
They all took stools by the center stage, waiting for the evening's strip tease show to begin.
Just then, a cross eyed mare with a blonde mane and gray fur, who was dressed in a tiny, very revealing waitress outfit walked up and said, "Good evening ladies, my name is Ditzy Doo and I'll be your waitress. Can I get you anything to drink?"
"Derpy?" said Twilight, "is that you?"
"It might be", said Derpy, "It might be a muffin, but sadly it's not."
"What on earth are you doing working in a place like this?" asked Rarity, "I thought you were a mail mare".
Derpy said, "I was, but I dropped one too many things on Twilight that one time and my supervisor let me go. Actually, that's a lie. He fired me and had me dragged off, kicking and screaming. I saw they had a help wanted sign up here and found out the only requirements here are the ability to wear tight, revealing outfits in a crowded bar and have a butt ranging anywhere from cute to hot. I can't dance for manure, so the Princess made me a waitress. So, I'll ask again, do any of you want something to drink?"
"Right", said Twilight, "I'll have a margarita."
"I'd like a glass of white wine", said Rarity.
"A strawberry daiquiri, please", said Pinkie Pie, excitedly.
"I'll have a shot of tequila. Make sure it has a worm in it", said Rainbow Dash.
"If it's not too much trouble, I'd like an apple martini, please", said Fluttershy.
Applejack said, "Give me a shot of whiskey and a beer."
Derpy nodded as she wrote that all down on her note pad and said, "Ok. I'll be right back with those." She turned around and wiggled her butt at them. She looked over her shoulder and said, "What? Isn't any pony gonna squeeze my butt?"
Rainbow Dash quickly grabbed her butt and squeezed, her wings going up slightly. (Wing Boner!)
Derpy blushed, wiggled free of Rainbow's grip and scurried over to the bar to have the bartender make their drinks.
A short while later, the girls were sipping their drinks and watching a young stallion, who had brown fur and was dressed as a firefighter in a plastic red helmet and a bright red thong, as he danced.
"Twilight, my student", said Princess Celestia, walking up to the girls, "It's so nice to see you. I see you didn't have any trouble finding the place."
"Nope. No trouble at all", said Twilight, not taking her eyes off the dancer, "I must say, Princess, I love what you have going here. What made you decide to have a bi-sexual strip club?"
The Princess smiled and said, "To be honest, I swing both ways and I love lap dances. I couldn't find a club where I could have a mare on the left and a stallion on the right, so I created my own."
They looked back at the dancer, only to find he was no longer wearing his thong and his semi-hard dick was waving dangerously close to Rainbow Dash's face. She was loving it and using everything in her power to not take it into her mouth and start sucking it. Her wings were almost fully out.
The dancer suddenly stopped, scooped up his thong and his tips and walked off the stage.
"Rip off!" said Rainbow Dash, tucking her wad of bills back into... wherever she kept it. (Don't ask me. I don't know)
The lights went down and only the spotlights shown over the stage.
"Fillies and Gentle colts", said the DJ, Vinyl Scratch, "Please welcome... the Stallion you've all been waiting for... ya know him, ya love him, ya can't live without him, the one, the only, Crimson Cowboy!"
The spotlights moved back to the stage which had been fogged over. As the fog lifted, they could see a large, young stallion with red fur and an orange mane. He was dressed like Applejack's cousin Braeburn with a few differences. He had a brown leather vest, a brown cowboy hat, brown assless chaps with a gun holster that had a water pistol in it and a white G-string. He was also covered in body glitter. He had his head angled forward, using his hat to hide his face.
The girls whistled at him as he began to dance. He reared up on his hind legs, put his front hooves behind his head and swiveled his hips side to side, showing off his ass. Suddenly, he grabbed his water gun and squirted it at the girls, he just happened to hit Rarity and Rainbow Dash.
Surprisingly, Rarity took it in stride. She giggled, leaned over to Rainbow Dash and said, "He didn't need the water gun to make me wet."
"I bet he has something else he wants to squirt all over us", said Rainbow Dash. They both giggled.
The dancer took his vest off and threw it onto the floor, showing off his muscular chest. Then he took off his chaps and gun belt. Now he was dancing in only his stetson and his G-string.
Rainbow Dash cheered, put a stack of ones on her wing and threw them into the air. Making them rain down over the stage. "I'm makin' it rain!" she yelled.
Fluttershy whistled, held up a twenty and stuffed it into the dancer's G-string. She bit her lip in joy and excitement.
Rarity held up a $100 dollar bill and said, "I got a hundred dollar bill right here with your name on it if you take that G-string off!"
He grabbed the G-string and yanked it off. So forcefully, his hat fell off. The girls began tossing their money into the over turned hat. The dancer pointed his head toward the ceiling, continuing to hide his face while his long, hard cock swung freely in the girl's faces. Rainbow and Fluttershy both had huge wing-boners.
Suddenly, Applejack noticed something on the dancer's flank. It was a splotch of red paint. Obviously, he had painted over his cutie mark so he wouldn't be recognized, but it didn't help any. Applejack saw a little bit of green showing from under the paint. She recognized the large red dancer. It was Big Macintosh! She was watching her own brother strip! Her brother's cock was waving in her face and her pussy was dripping freely! Not wanting to reveal his identity to everypony, she quietly slipped away from the stage, and then fled the bar.
Later that evening...
Applejack was sitting in the kitchen, sipping on some apple juice and waiting for Big Mac to get home. Boy, was he gonna get reamed out when he walked in.
Just then, the door opened and in walked Big Mac. He was wearing his usual yoke, he had saddle bags on his back and he was covered in body glitter.
"Well, well, well", said Applejack, "just where have you been?"
Big Mac looked at her and said, "I was out working, then I had a beer with a buddy of mine."
"Really?" said Applejack, "Working? Well just what kind of work? And why are you covered in glitter? Was it a gay bar?"
Big Mac scowled at Applejack and said, "AJ, just what are you gettin' at here?"
Applejack sighed and said, "The girls and I went to that new bar, Celestial Playground tonight. We saw you dance. We saw you wave your cock around. Your cock was in my face. I paid you to wave your cock around! My friends all saw your cock whipping around! Why, Big Mac? Why did you do this? Why do you hate me?"
Big Mac sighed and said, "Ok, ok. Looks like it's time to come clean. Yes, I am an exotic dancer. Yes, I strip for tips. Yes, I waved my cock around. But I had no idea you or your friends were there. How could I? Besides, I didn't choose to work there. I didn't have a choice!"
Applejack glared at him and said, "How can you not have a choice to become a stripper?"
Big Mac said, "I'm glad you asked. See, Princess Celestia came here one day and told me I could either work for her as a stripper and give her free lap dances, or she would lower the value of apples and raise taxes. We're barely gettin' by as it is. Either one of those would kill the farm. Both would completely kill us with no hope of coming back. I had to accept. I had no idea that you and the girls were at the club. Nor did I know they would be so eager to see my cock. How was I supposed to know?"
Applejack looked down at the floor and said, "I... I don't know. I never thought of that."
Big Mac continued, "You thought I actually wanted to get naked and wave my cock around for random strangers? Are you kidding me?"
"What was I supposed to think? What are you supposed to think when you see your brother stripping?" Applejack asked.
Big Mac sighed and said, "I don't know. But please promise me you're not gonna tell the girls, ok?"
Applejack nodded and said, "Ok, ok. I promise I won't tell. Just please be careful and at least tell me when you're gonna be working, ok?"
Big Mac nodded and said, "Deal."
"By the way", said Applejack, "Not that it's any of my business, how much is she paying you?"
"Well", said Big Mac, "I'm not getting paid a super lot, but the tips are all under the table", he shook off his saddle bags and slid them over to her. "Go ahead. Open them."
Applejack undid the clasp, lifted the flap and was shocked by what she saw. The bags were both stuffed with cash. It was mostly ones, but there were some larger bills. She burst into happy tears and said, "Oh my gosh! This means we can finally afford to replace that saggy, ol' roof. And you can replace that saggy, ol' plow. And Granny can replace that saggy, ol' hip."
"Exactly", said Big Mac, "and I only have to work evenings, so I'll be able to help with apple buck season."
"Great", said Applejack, "I don't think I can do it alone again."
"Wait", said Big Mac, "are you really ok with me being an exotic dancer?"
Applejack shrugged and said, "Well, I'm not really happy about it, but I'll get over it. Besides, if you like shaking your ass for random strangers while you're covered in body glitter, who am I to stand in the way?" She smirked and said, "Plus, if the cash flow continues like this, I would have to be clinically insane to tell you to stop."
Big mac nodded and said, "Speaking of body glitter, don't ever use that stuff. After the show, I got some in my eye. That shit burns like hell when it gets in your eyes."
Applejack giggled and said, "You know, Rarity really liked the sparkles. I bet if you put some on your dick, she'll almost have to have you give her a lap dance."
Big Mac nodded and said, "I'll think about it. I'm not sure I want to take your friend's money. Now, if you'll excuse me, I want to take a shower."
"Wash away the skank?" asked Applejack.
"No", said Big Mac, "I wanna wash away the glitter. It's startin' to itch somethin' fierce. Not tah mention, it's in places it should never, ever have gotten into."
Applejack giggled and said, "Good luck with that. Glitter is the Herpes of craft supplies. Once you get it on you, it never goes away."
Big Mac laughed and said, "Very funny, Demetri Martin", then left to take a shower.
In the shower...
Big Mac stood in the shower, letting the hot water spray over him and slowly wash the glitter off of him. "Why did I even use that stuff?" he thought, "Tomorrow, I have to tell Celestia that I'm not using the glitter again. I think I reserve the right to some dignity. I shouldn't have to look like the offspring of a gay vampire and a cowboy. I look Brokeback Mountain enough in the leather vest with nothing underneath." He began to scrub his body vigorously, removing the glitter from his fur. He finally got it all out, so he began rinsing the shower floor, making sure the glitter went down the drain.
Later...
Applejack, Big Mac, Apple Bloom and Granny Smith had just finished supper. Applejack and Granny began cleaning the dishes. (Not trying to be sexist, just want Big Mac and Apple Bloom to be alone. No, not for sex. Get your mind out of the gutter, pervert.)
"C'mon Apple Bloom", said Big Mac, "time for bed."
"Awww", said Apple Bloom, yawning.
"C'mon", said Big Mac, "you can keep trying to get your cutie mark tomorrow. You're still a little filly and you need your rest."
Apple Bloom yawned again, leaned heavily against Big Mac and said, "I'm not even tired."
Big Mac chuckled and said, "Ya know, we can do this the easy way, or there's that other way."
Apple Bloom planted her hooves and said, "Let's try that other way!" she yawned again.
Big Mac quickly stuck his head under her and lifted her up. She slid down until she lay sideways across his shoulders.
"No fair!" said Apple Bloom.
"All is fair in love and war" said Big Mac as he carried her up the stairs and toward her bedroom.
"Then its war!" said Apple Bloom, nuzzling her head into Big Mac's shoulder.
Big Mac laid Apple Bloom down on her bed and tucked her in.
Apple Bloom hugged his neck. When they parted, she asked, "Big Macintosh, can I have a good night song?"
Big Mac nodded and said, "of course you can. How about 'you are my sunshine'?"
Apple Bloom nodded happily.
Big Mac cleared his throat and sang softly, "You are my sun-shine, my only sun-shine. You make me hap-py when skies are gray. You'll never know dear how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away."
Apple Bloom had already gone to sleep.
"Sleep tight, my little angel", said Big Macintosh. He kissed her forehead.