This will be something of a catch-all for the plotless cracks that come to my mind. A burial ground for half-baked bunnies, if you will. (Hooray for mixed metaphors!)
All of these deal with Naruto - which I do not own.
1: Nin Pig
"Shizune, your pig is wearing a vest."
"Ton-Ton always wears a vest."
"Yes," Tsunade was grinning now, "but that's a new vest."
Shizune blushed. "Well, she couldn't very well wear that red one on the mission – it would be ruined."
"Oink!" The pig sounded rather proud of herself.
"Shizune, the pig is wearing a flak jacket."
Sure enough, in place of her typical red vest, Ton-Ton was wearing a tiny Konoha ninja's vest, complete with the signature red swirl on the back.
"So?" Shizune sounded defensive, and Ton-Ton mimicked her human's tone with another guarded oink.
"So, when, pray tell, did your pig become a chuunin?"
"You know Ton-Ton helps me on missions – she has an excellent sense of smell! She's my familiar – my… my… nin-pig!"
Tsunade actually snorted, and Ton-Ton looked offended. "Okay, then." The Fifth's voice was dangerously patient. "Now that you are all coordinated, do you think you can go on this mission."
Shizune, recognizing the warning gleam in Tsuande's eyes, snapped to attention. "Yes, Lady Tsunade!"