University El Ultimiso
By PhoenixHelix
"Its been two weeks since the incident involving Son Goku and Homer Simpson occurred" the anchor lady spoke in prescript monologue "Homer Simpson aged 39 had attempted to transform into a Super Saiyan like his opponent only to suffer from an irritable bowel movement and spontaneously exploded soon after. Son Goku was unavailable for questioning…in other news I happen to like horse on woman porno movies and do the tango nake…HEY! WHO'S BEEN MESSING WITH THE SCRIPT!" the anchor lady screamed as the faint sound of laughter could be heard in the background
"THIS IS THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK!" she screeched as she lunged at the camera
"Fox news….they always know how to lighten the mood" Helix laughed as he watched the Technical difficulty message show up on the TV. Kicking back on his living room sofa he took a lengthy swig of his Cider he was about to reach for the remote but the author's attention was interrupted by a soundly crash coming from the garden. Preparing an orb of energy in one hand he jumped up from his sofa and leaped out an open window to find a guy with a scruffy hairdo and wearing an overcoat facedown on the lawn.
"Owww…" the guy moaned as he stirred.
"Ok who the hell are…Castiel? Helix raised a brow and dissipated the energy orb; recognising him as the unexpected guest looked up at the author.
"Yeah…" the guy now known as Castiel replied as he rubbed his forehead and got to his feet.
"Care to explain what you're doing in my garden…facedown?" the author questioned "I was going just appear inside your house like I do with Sam and Dean…really spooks them…but for some reason I appeared just above your house…" Castiel replied as he straightened himself out
"They invented the doorbell for a reason…" Helix muttered and rolled his eyes at the vessel which the angel Castiel inhabited.
"Last time someone rang your doorbell you came out with that scythe of yours and threatened to disembowel them…that poor young girl scout is still in therapy after that incident need I remind you" Castiel commented.
"Hey I watched that movie Loaded Weapon 1 and I swear to your father that she was a hitman in disguise! Helix retorted defensively as the angel simply shrugged his shoulders ironically.
"…Anyway…I've been sent here by the Masters of Fanfiction to invite you to a place within the upcoming university project." Castiel commented receiving a smirk of humour form the author
"You mean the fan fiction I planned in my first year on the site and just never could be arsed getting round to writing and have only recently been inspired to start from scratch; creating a fic with a load of plot holes and chaotic storylines that neither relate nor carry on from one another. Not to mention implementing random cameos from random authors as well as OC's and characters from numerous media?" Helix questioned as he broke the perennial fourth wall.
"…Yes." Castiel responded with a hint of humour in his tone.
"Well then that says it all now doesn't it." The author smirked as he kicked off the ground and floated gracefully in through the window, Castiel not far behind; however not as gracefully.
"I'll get my stuff ready and I'll head over there for the initiation ceremony" Helix commented as he snapped his fingers summoning a single suitcase in the middle of the living room which when opened up looked like it could hold the universe inside it, much to Castiel's surprise
"You people never cease to amaze me…" the angel replied as he quickly pocketed something as he stood up after tripping over the window frame.
"You forget Cass; we authors aren't bound by the same laws of fiction that normal characters are; unless its for cheap tricks or we're in another authors work as a guest, other then that we pretty much do as we please" the author responded as he filled the case with his effects then snapped it shut.
"Nnnyaaarrr…" a light voice called out, to Castiel's surprise, the voice's owner was soon realised as a small cute purple serpentine like creature with a blade-like tail, two pairs of horns and a child like demeanour that could be seen from the look in her amber coloured eyes, floated in from the hallway with a yawn and snaked itself around the author's waist and shoulders
"S'up Seiryuu? Had a good nap girl?" Helix spoke softly as he tickled the dragon-serpent's chin causing her to begin mewling happily.
"Hmm on that note I will take my leave." Castiel commented nervously as he attempted to teleport away; his hand in his overcoats left pocket only ending up landing head first in a pile of cow manure in the field opposite the Authors home as he re-emerged.
"I should've told you that no one can teleport in or out of my home without my permission" Helix called out as he laughed and flew over on his now exposed wings, his suitcase in one hand, a mobile phone in the other with which he quickly took a picture of the angel's predicament, while Seiryuu was still wrapped around his waist; and giggling from what Castiel could tell.
"May I just leave now?" Castiel asked, not angered by the outcome but slightly irritated by the inconvenience of it; that much so he didn't even question how Helix knew exactly where he would end up.
"Sure thing Cass, say hey to the Winchesters for me… after you clean yourself at least…see ya!" Helix pocketed his mobile and flicked the tips of his wings allowing the angel to teleport away.
"And now just to wet my whistle and…where's my hipflask?" Helix paused and quickly checked his pockets then realising muttered "…Castiel….that angel needs rehab…badly. Perhaps I should… nah screw it that's something for Sam and Dean to deal with" with a flap of his wings, Helix elevated skyward and on towards the university.
Elsewhere…
"Are you drunk…again?" Dean asked amused as he encountered a staggering Castiel who he found with his pants around his ankles and singing in a language that clearly wasn't English…or anything legible for that matter with the author's hipflask in hand
"NO…YES!" Castiel replied with a slur just as he collapsed on the older Winchester.
"Jesus…of all the ones we could've had we have to put up with Oliver Reed's guardian angel…" Dean sighed as Castiel began snoring and muttering something about bananas and ice cream.
Again…Elsewhere
The clubroom door flew open and almost fell off its hinges as the yellow ribbon and hair band wearing goddess known to all otaku's as Haruhi Suzumiya; skipped in with a cheesy grin. Her arrival was welcomed by the waving of a hand compliments of a smiling Itsuki Koizumi as he stood, the nervous bowing of a trembling Mikuru Asahina as she held a teapot, the null response from a channelled Yuki Nagato as she continued to tap away on her laptop; bunny headphones adorned. And the tiresome gaze of a guy called Kyon.
"Ok everyone I've decided we're going to University!" Haruhi boomed with her grin plastered to her face.
"….What?" Kyon responded non-chantly as everyone except Yuki looked towards the Brigade chief with a puzzled look.
"Well according to this message I found in my locker" Haruhi began as she lifted up
A piece of A4 paper with all sorts of information on it "We've been PERSONALLY accepted into the Author's university! That means the SOS Brigade is famous with the BIG ones! Kyon I tell ya; We're getting noticed for our amazingness!"
"It would make sense if we did anything amazing…" Kyon mentally broke the fourth wall. "How many times have I done this now…" he added.
"Why that sounds like a fabulous idea Ms Suzumiya" Koizumi commented with his signature smile. "To think we'll be surrounded by numerous big names such as SuperStarUltra and who knows…" The esper's sentence was cut off as Haruhi slammed her fist into the table, causing Mikuru to squeak and hide behind Yuki, who was still oblivious to the situation in the room; her attention being on the eroge female who was stripping on her laptop screen.
"DON'T. MENTION. THAT. NAME!" Haruhi screeched like a banshee making Koizumi scream like a girl.
"Still haven't gotten over the fact that author had you impregnated with a demon from Silent Hill just for a laugh Haruhi? Or how about the time he had you get drunk and go on a hunt for the lost Rollo?" Kyon mused with a sigh as he mentally snickered.
"Oh I wanna get even with that guy!" Haruhi was now blowing steam from her ears "Not just for the demon thingy! He's humiliated me more times then Kyon's face-palmed at one of my brilliant ideas! TO THE UNIVERSITY!"
"Haruhi. that's what Authors do: they screw around with the lives of fictional characters like us just because they're bored besides none of your ideas ever have been…Annnd she's gone…" Kyon rolled his eyes as the Brigade Chief raced out the door in a cloud of smoke.
"Well…we…should go…after her huh Kyon?" Mikuru stammered as she peered her head from behind Yuki's lap.
"Ms Asahina's right. With all those Authors and the fact Ms Suzumiya is one of extreme few fictional characters with author-like powers who knows what she'll get up to…" Koizumi added
"You can calm down now y'know…hearing you squeak like that really does make me question your orientation." Kyon remarked as he shrugged his shoulders while the esper breathed in deep and walked out the clubroom with the time traveller behind him.
"…Why do I think this is such a bad idea…" Kyon added as he followed as his own pace. "Oh wait…its one of Suzumiya's…."
At the University…
The Author finally landed on solid ground after a long flight which took longer since a giant meteor which took the form of a fist kept stalking him, he had eventually managed to trick it into crashing into Mt Fiji 's side and thus introducing the intergalactic wrestling federation to the Japanese and many countries around the world.
"Damn I used to love that anime…" Helix smirked then looked up to break the fourth wall…for the second time in the prologue chapter. "I'm not claiming I created it guys! I own NONE of the rights to it….although I might come up with a good fic for it…"
"Don't you think you should just stick to this one He" a feminine voice interrupted "I mean c'mon you've never actually written a fic that you ever completed aside from a shoddy Dr Who one-shot that never got more then a single revie…"
"Soultail Omega-Light. While I think yer an amazing gal there's no need to state the obvious" Helix responded as he turned to face the author taking on the form of a human/fox hybrid with silver-ish fur and twelve tails wearing what looked like ancient Chinese armour.
"Hehehe I just love teasing ya!" Soultail remarked as she playfully swatted Helix with a couple of her tails. "I'm here as your tour guide…for some reason?" the Kitsune then shrugged, turned and gestured to the colossal building ahead of the pair.
"Phew…must have set the guys at the site a couple hundred bucks…." Helix mused as hundreds of different characters from various media began emerging; including Solid Snake, Chris Redfield, Harry Mason, Donkey Kong, several Pikachu, some girls from random anime and even a giant robot with a car for its head.
"Yeeeehaaaw! we have arrived!" could be heard from the car 80 feet up above.
"Coop…" Helix laughed "Maybe this wasn't such a bad idea to write after all…HEY!" the author noticed as someone with blonde hair and a monkey-like tail grabbed his suitcase and began running into the building with it.
"Get back here you damn chimp!" Helix reached into his pocket, brought out a White and Black striped coin and clenched it, making it transform into a Winchester Breach Loading Sidearm rifle with a Black and White Tiger pattern across it. The Author spun the breach and took aim. "IM GONNA BLAST YER ASS BACK TO THE JUNGLE!"
"Relax… he's only gonna take your stuff to your room dude" a mellow voice echoed as a girl dressed in black walked past and nodded before wandering into the building with a dozen more authors.
"Ok Rayvn…SheraSh… whatever name you're going by these days…" Helix sighed as he holstered the gun to the side holster that appeared out of nowhere thanks to the glory that is the plot hole! "We'll shoot the critter next time Byakko" the author muttered receiving a growl from the rifle.
"Annnyhow… now we're done with that…we gonna go in?" Soultail pipped up and wandered ahead "…He talk's to his gun? … boy he's crazy!" the Kisune author giggled as Helix followed in behind her; his wings now faded.
"Ok! So this is the main hall…"
"I see that…
"And this is the cafeteria…"
"Mmmhmm…"
"This is the Merchant who you can get all sorts of stuff…"
"He doesn't have his brother with him I hope…"
"…Moving on annnd hereeee weee…"
"Go!" Soultail exclaimed as the poorly written script went back to normal and the two authors found themselves sat down in a oval room that looked more like the gladiatorial arena.
"Ok am I the only one to think this fic isn't making sense to anyone?" Helix pondered as the tour only lasted approximately seven lines of dialogue
"We're HEEEERRRRREEEEE!" Haruhi's voice boomed causing the author to look up to be presented with the confident grin of the Brigade Leader who had just taken a seat in the upper floor of the hall with the other members of the SOS Brigade sat around her.
"Why the hell is she acting like a mai…." Helix's eyes widened as he realized "AHHH CRAP! I uploaded this in the Haruhi Suzumiya pile!"
"You didn't even notice when you were uploading?" Soultail asked with a stiffled laugh.
"Ughhh first chapter in and its already a crackfic…"
The Brigade Leader ignored Helix completely and kicked her feet up, raising a brow of interest as someone walked onto the stage and tapped the mic with their knuckle her eyes sparkled as the person in question was sporting giant bat-like ears, green skin and cloven hands.
"Attention…" Vorador called out on the microphone, completely ignored by the large crowd that had suddenly filled out the room without any particular note by the author's mediocre typing ability.
"Attention." the vampire called out again in a more stoic tone but was again completely ignored. His left eye twitched as a paper airplane which was set on fire cruised right past him and set a nearby bald guy's head alight. The flame turning blue.
"Hmmm… I like it!" Hades smirked as he brushed over his new look, while receiving a thumbs up from the two dwarf-sized demons who were grovelling at his feet.
"Ahem….OI!" Vorador bellowed into the mic, causing several of the speakers to blow up.
"Now. We all know why we're here" Vorador began
"You totally screwed up those speakers duuuuude!" a guy going by the name of Ted Theodore Logan yelled out as he and his buddy air guitared.
"Yes, indeed." Vorador nodded. "Now then…"
"That was uncalled for!" a random author called out
"It really doesn't't matter…onto the matter of…..what is it?" the vampire growled as someone raised their hand
"You….wouldn't't happen to be a relative of Yoshi would you?" a Dragonball Z Abridged fan yelled, receiving a mixture of laughs and face palming, Vorador wasn't at all impressed.
"Yoshi….DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING GREEN DINOSAUR TO YOU! OR EVEN LIKE PICCOLO FOR THAT MATTER!" the vampire bellowed, gaining a snicker.
Meanwhile
"WHEEEEE!" Goku squealed as he raised his arms up high as Piccolo carried him up the steps towards the University.
"Remind me why I'm doing this…." the Namekiean sighed as he continued walking at a leisurely pace.
"Because Chi-chi asked you to?" Goku suggested.
"…Actually I thought she pretty much beat the crap outta me and forced me into it…but that's not the point… you wanna get off me now?" Piccolo rolled his eyes as the Saiyan dug his heels into his sides. "Why….oh why…" the Namekiean muttered as they began climbing the 1001 steps up to the university, by they I mean Piccolo.
Back to the Hall
"And that's why for the next year you will all be staying at the university." Vorador concluded. "Are there anymore questions?"
Silence permeated throughout the entire hall aside from the occasional cough or laugh.
"Well then, I'm sure you will all make for a satisfactory…."
"Oh wait I gotta question! …..are you SUUUURE you're not a Yoshi?" the Abridged fan yelled out causing the vampire to growl and clutch at the microphone.
"Enough. Of. The. Abridged. PUNS!" Vorador lifted the mic stand,
"Umm Professor Vorador?"
"WHAAAT!"
Nervously Jim Chapman of Resident Evil Outbreak stood up from the front of the hall and straightened his jacket
"Will there be any presentations by Chuck Norri…" Jim's head exploded with a bang, sending blood, skull and brain matter all around him covering everyone in the surrounding five rows along with Vorador himself.
"EWWWW!" Ashley Graham screamed as she jumped up and down flapping her arms about. But also delivering some adequate 'bouncing' fan service to a nearby trio of Resident Evil Fan-boys who proceeded to nosebleed.
"Damnit…" Brad Vickers sighed. "Talk about being a total Mary-Su…" Suddenly his head also exploded sending chunks flying.
"Who the HELL'S DOING THAT! Vorador roared, and glared at Helix who was waving Byakko above his head.
"Don't tell me that author's gonna be a total Gar…" A random author's sentence was cut short as Helix cocked the rifle and aimed at his head.
"Finish that sentence. Go on. I DARE you!" Helix growled with the barrel of the breach loaded rifle gleaming in the light.
"Errrhehehe…Helix? Doncha think yer're being a little…y'know…extreme?" Soultail commented with a wince.
"There are two phrases among many that have been spoken in the past few moments: Mary-Sue, Gary-Stu and the uttering of the name Chuck Norris. All these I cannot stand" Helix huffed as the random Author disappeared in a flash. "There are more but hopefully they shall go unspoken"
"Why're you so peeved about guys saying Mary-Sue and Gary-Stu?" An author by the name of Arcbus yelled over.
"Because my dear, ever since I got onto the site five years back I have been CONSTANTLY presented with those phrases and the rants about them are RIDICULOUS!" the author boomed "Its called FANFICTION dot net not POINTOUTTHECHARACTERWHO dot net! Authors write fiction for the hell of it and the sake of their own perceptions of creativity; no-one HAS to read the fic let alone review them! There are those who like to use those sorts of plots so everyone paying attention: DEAL WITH IT!"
"Y'know…if Chuck Norris were…" Helix rested Byakko's barrel on his shoulder and fired, blowing the head of Silent Hill 2's Eddie completely in two before he could finish. Breathing heavily the author sat down, rested Byakko on his lap and closed his eyes.
"And…about C.N?" a nearby sat Snake Plisken from the old Escape from NY/LA movies asked with a smirk.
"…He's an overrated overused old hack, his name pisses me off." Helix replied with a nod.
"You…have issues dude." the Kitusne Author sweat dropped; causing the author to groan.
"Of course I have issues! I've not written a fic I've ever stood by; I ran outta ideas for this chapter already: and what's more…." Helix stood up "THAT BASTARD CASTIEL STOLE MY FUCKIN HIPFLASK!"
The author holstered Byakko who was purring contently upon the gore it had created and disappeared in a flash of light.
"Damn…all that over a hipflask?" Soultail laughed.
"Helix, really needs therapy." Arcbus replied, having appeared beside the Kitsune author.
"You don't really give a crap about what you say around him do ya"
"Nope."
"You know what; I quit!" Vorador muttered then wandered towards the curtain only to trip on a piece of Jim's skull and be decapitated by a conveniently placed conveniently switched on hedge trimmer."….Not again…." the vampire's head sighed.
"…Well that was dull…" Haruhi sighed as she leaned back, the hall bustling with conversation again; almost as if the event hadn't ever occurred.
"What do you plan to do now Ms Suzumiya?" Koizumi asked gaining a glare from the brigade leader. "Im gonna go huntin after that guy…the one we shouldn't ever mention by name…revenge is the first agenda of the Ultimiso SOS Brigade!" Haruhi boomed, making Mikuru cower into a ball.
"Great…now potential murder is added to our ridiculous goals…" Kyon mentally broke the fourth wall.
"And of couuurse Mikuru not forgetting you…" Haruhi's death glare turned into a light-hearted smile "Since we've so much more potential members now; its your job as club mascot to attract em! So before we left I got ya some new outfits!" the Brigade Leader chuckled as Mikuru shuddered as she dared to imagine some of the revealing outfits she'd be made to wear.
"Did someone say Outfits? Mmmmm I like the sound of that…I LOOOVE Cosplay!" a woman dressed in a scandalously looking black cat suite with her hair seemingly tied up wearing glasses leaned over, her exposed cleavage close to Kyon's head making him swallow hard.
"Yeah. Mikuru's our mascot so she wears all sorts of fetishey stuff." Haruhi responded boorishly. "And you're…"
"They call me Bayonetta" she responded in her fake English accent. The umbra witch gave a subtle wink at Kyon.
"Damn…why in front of Haruhi…" Kyon mentally broke the fourth wall in a tiny voice.
"You'd better watch Kyon, he's a bit of a perv" the Brigade Leader glared at the protagonist making him sigh.
"Well I sure don't mind….he's as you'd say…'kinda cute'" Bayonetta playfully bit her lower lip making sure Kyon was watching. "Besides, who knows which author he'll end up with as his master/mistress.
"Wait what?" the protagonist exclaimed with widened eyed.
"Dugh! Figures you weren't paying attention" the brigade leader groaned. "Koizumi, explain it will ya?"
"No problem" the Esper continued to smile broadly as he turned to the protagonist. "You see at the University there are two divisions: the Fictional and the Authors; we're classed as fictional so we must always address an author with the title Sama unless the author permits otherwise. At the same time every week we partner up with a single author and we serve them as a butler/maid. At the end of the week we change authors unless the author we're serving chooses to request us for longer. And this can remain for the whole year."
"So in short: all of us here have to put up with some random person for every week of the year?" Kyon responded with his mouth agape.
"Yep and they have the right to do whatever they want to us too!" Bayonetta mused as she wandered off. "Hope I get a really fine one, one worth my time…"
"Anything?" Kyon exclaimed frightened as his gaze turned to Mikuru who looked back timidly. "Even Miss Asahina? Who knows what sick freak could end up with her!"
"Kyon don't worry! She's an SOS brigade member! No one would DARE touch her that way; that's MY job" Haruhi beamed determinedly.
"Don't forget Haruhi, you're in on this too…" Kyon sighed only to become puzzled when Haruhi grinned in response.
"Actually Suzumiya-Sama was accepted in the author division…" Koizumi replied
"WHAT?" Kyon exclaimed "How the hell Haruhi!"
"That's Haruhi-Sama to you Kyon!" the brigade leader yelled angrily before she stormed off out of the hall. Much of no surprise to the surrounding authors who watched her series and read her novels
"This is because of her powers right?" the protagonist turned to the esper to receive a nod.
"That's right Kyon; since Suzumiya-Sama is essentially the author of our existence she was granted favour by the ones in charge." Koizumi responded dutifully as he turned to leave. "We'll find out who our first authors are with these." the esper lifted a silver key with the number 4496 etched on it.
"The authors are completely unaware of who their servant is Kyon." Mikuru spoke up, her timidness gone with Haruhi's exit. "So we at least know they're going to be as surprised as we are when we turn up to their dorm room"
"But Mikuru…"
"Don't worry Kyon" the time traveller smiled as she lifted her key with the number 1705 on it. "I'll be just fine"
"Information from the future huh?"
"That's classified" Mikuru giggled as she left the hall.
"Well Kyon: Good luck!" Koizumi waved farewell then left leaving the protagonist to his thoughts.
"Well…wonder who I'm gonna be stuck with…" Kyon muttered as he looked back to his seat and picked up the key with the number 3507. "Could be anyone…I just hope they're not too crazy…huh? What happened to Nagato?" the protagonist looked round for the alien girl but found no trace of her. "Probably still hooked into her laptop or reading that book of hers…" he mentally broke the fourth wall "I keep doing that and I'm gonna end up tearing the universe to pieces…or something like that…"
Yuki Nagato's apartment…
"War! Huh! Yeaaah! What is it good forr? Aaaabsolutely nothin!" Yuki sang while dancing naked in the shower, thrusting her hips to the sway of the music booming from her stereo
"Ssssay it again nowwww War! Huh! Yeeaah! Whaat is it gooood for? aaaabsolutely nothin! Whaaaaaaahhhaaa yeeeah!" the alien girl belted out in her best voice as she stood under the showerhead.
"Mr Kimidori…what's wrong with Yuki?" Ashakura asked with her chibi eyebrows raised as high as they could go as she sat outside the bathroom door, watching Yuki's silhouette start doing the monkey then performing a backflip.
"…I don't know…." the green balloon dog responded hesitantly as the silhouette began humping the wall.
"She's daydreaming this."
"…Yeah…unfortunately…"
"What?"
"Nothing."
Yuki's eyes blinked and in an instant she realised she was alone in the club room which was engulfed in darkness except from the faint light emanating from her laptop which had the alien girl's latest eroge pause menu depicted.
"…" she muttered before closing the laptop and walked though the pitch dark school just as sirens were beginning to wail in the distance.
"…Sensing hostile honing in fast…" Yuki muttered as she crouched and leaped out the window and into a open portal just as an army of Excel Saga Muchu's began stampeding though the hallway.
Meanwhile in a dorm of the university…
"Zzzzzzzz"
"Damn Genbu do you REALLY have to snore that loud?" Helix yelled as he kicked the shell of a black turtle the size of a large dog as it slept heavily.
"Zzzzzz…wwahhaa?" the turtle roused "What is it Author kid? Im tryin to nap here…"
"Yeah, you do that but you're gonna have to turn into your other form: we aren't allowed pets I don't think." the author responded.
"Dognamit…very well…and I'm no-one's pet!" Genbu sighed as he withdrew into his shell which shaped itself into a drum kit.
"Muuch better." Helix nodded as he sat back on one of his recliners facing the TV which was hung on the wall opposite the door, Byakko laid out on the bedside desk along with a pair of long red and gold knives with a feather pattern along the blade. Seiryuu taking the form of a Scythe leaning against the one mattress bunk bed.
"Wonder what services this place….hmm?" Helix heard a key being slid into the lock of the door and turned. "Well then who do we hav…..oh christ no…"
"A pleasure to meet you Helix-Sama" Itsuki Koizumi bowed respectfully as he closed the door "My name's…"
"Look, I already know your name Koizumi, and stop with the Sama" Helix sighed. "Damnit…why couldn't it have been some gorgeous girl…" he mentally thought.
"Thank you Helix. I hope my services are to your liking. The esper continued to smile his routine smile.
"Whatever…" the author responded as he sat back down. "Lets get this across first ok: I'm not easy to get along with and; I know you to be a real bitchboy. So lets just get through this week without any hassle k?"
"I see… very well Helix I shall do my best." the esper replied.
"Wonder who Kyon ended up with…" Helix's sudden comment was interrupted by the faint voice of Haruhi from a few floors up.
"Kyon GET OUT! Im changing!"
"…Guess that answers that...was sorta predicting it though" the author smirked "Poor Kyon, least its only for a week, though knowing Suzumiya she'll probably keep him for the sake of…Koizumi what are you doing?" the author rolled his eyes as he noticed the esper moving several pieces of furniture.
"I figure this wardrobe would look much better here, lets more light in and more spacious." Koizumi replied with a assuring nod.
"Itsuki Koizumi…I can tell already you're gonna get on my nerves…" Helix face palmed and groaned
Annnnd there we go ladies and gentleman! The first chapter of the new version of University El Ultimiso! Will I continue like I've been inspired to by the fics I've read in the last couple of weeks? MAYBE! Depending on how well this first chapter does review wise: hell even if it doesn't attract any attention I'll probably carry on anyways!
Hope you've enjoyed what you've read so far: I can promise you: pointless plotholes and random cameos from random FF authors (via request or not) are to be expected!: btw superstarultra Soultail Omega-light, Arcbus, SheraSherada (Formally known as Ravyn Crescent all own themselves. Aside from myself and the 4 items/characters in the last scene I own NONE of the rights to any of the characters used and I make no profit from this fic based on their copyright. With that disclaimer I should be cool ^-^
NEXT TIME: We have a special guest in the form of Baron Samedi; the Zombie from the old game known as Atmosfear/Nightmare II as special guest narrator and opening character!