A/N: Ok this has to be my most ludicrous ideas for a fanfic but I could not resist it once the idea came to me. I was shocked to discover that quite a few people have done this but… the idea tickles me none the less.

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Naruto sat quietly at the back of the meeting room, around him where several other ANBU and a couple of the higher-ranking Jounin who had also been called to this meeting. The Hokage was lightly dozing in a seat to the side of the room as everyone tried to ignore the boring voice that droned over them all. He hoped she would retire soon – he was already twenty and wanted her office more than anything.

This was the most pointless idea the council had ever come up with – who the hell came up with the idea of a health and safety seminar for Shinobi? What the hell was that anyway? 'Be careful, Kunai can be dangerous.' Well no shit Shinobi used them TO KILL PEOPLE.

Naruto ignored the meeting and retreated into his own mind, the next time he opened his eyes he found himself in ankle deep water surrounded by pipes and darkness. "Well, beets a boring meeting anyway." He mumbled to himself and walked in the direction of the beasts cage, well the direction he thought it was in – it always worried him that he could get lost inside his own head.

Following the feeling of Kyuubi's chakra Naruto soon found himself in a great hall with the seal at one end, "Yo! Anyone home – Kyuubi?"

He heard a dragging sound as if of something heavy being pulled across a surface which was then followed by splashing footsteps as the great creature approached the seal, once there the great beast laid down with its face near the seal so that it could talk comfortably, "What do you want?"

"Nothing much, I was just bored."

A sweat drop formed on the great daemons head, "You where bored?"

"Yep!" Naruto said happily while grinning.

"You where bored so you decided to come and bother the greatest demon who ever lived? Just to pass the time?"

Naruto thought for a moment, "I suppose if you say it that way it seems like a stupid idea."

A second sweat drop formed as the demon looked at the boy as if he was mad, "Did you think of anything to ask me or did your spontaneous visit have no purpose at all?"

"Hmm… no it had no purpose," Kyuubi sighed, "besides you seem to be asking enough questions for both of us."

"Well, why don't you think of something or otherwise I'm just going back to sleep."

Naruto thought for a moment, "Why don't you tell me a bit about yourself?"

Kyuubi raised a colossal eyebrow, "Come again?"

"You know, stuff like what you where like as a kid – if you ever where one for that matter, or what you do in your spare time."

Kyuubi looked around the cell and then looked back at Naruto who picked up on the point – for once.

"Before you where sealed in me."

Kyuubi thought, what could it hurt? "Well I was the greatest demon despite what the hachibi might say – sexist pig."

"Eh?"

"He used to insist that although I had nine tails and he had eight he was stronger because he was a guy! What a jerk."

Naruto blinked and then let out a shout.

"What is it?" Kyuubi asked annoyed that having been pestered to tell him about herself he would interrupt.

"You're a girl!"

For a third time a sweat drop formed on the great beast, "And the prize for obvious statement of the year goes to… you. Of course I'm a girl numbnuts!"

Naruto stared at her in blank shock only to be snapped out of it when she spoke, "Should I continue or has the idea of a girl being the strongest demon of all time broken your tiny male mind?"

Naruto snapped up, "Hey! Guys and girls are just as smart – it's only people who like to feel superior who say otherwise."

"Clearly you have never dated." The demon retorted earning a blush from the young man.

The demon rolled it's eyes and continued, "As I was saying despite what the sexist Hachibi used to say I was the strongest demon." She started to laugh, "I remember one time me and the four tails got together and turned him into a girl for a month – amazing how quick he changed his tune!"

"Changed him into a girl – what with a genjutsu?"

The Kyuubi snorted, "Nothing so crude – we're demons, if you can imagine it we can do it."

"Cool!" Naruto shouted causing the Kyuubi to blush slightly – though fortunately her fur blocked it.

'What the hell is wrong with me – why is this mortal getting me all worked up?' Kyuubi asked herself.

"Anyway," She said coughing and blocking it from her thoughts, "we made him spend a month as a woman, during that time he was forced to witness the horror of the six tails trying to mate with him."

Naruto started laughing so hard he was rolling round on the floor.

Kuubi smiled at how much Naruto was enjoying her story, "Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you look on it guess, he turned back into a male again about half way through embarrassing both of them."

Naruto continued to laugh wiping tears from his eyes, but managed to squeeze some words out, "Sorry… Kyuu-chan, but it… looks like the meetings… wrapping up… let's pick this up…. Some other time." And with that he left leaving a very amused and slightly embarrassed Kyuubi.

'he called me Kyuu-chan!'

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Naruto was still giggling when he came back from his seal and into the real world.

"Well I am glad you find it amusing Uzumaki but believe it or not water based Jutsu can lead to a danger of drowning!"

At this Naruto just laughed even harder and soon he had the whole room joining in much to the chagrin of the elder giving the speech.

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Naruto walked home from the meeting smiling to himself – the story Kyuu-chan had told him was just to funny – he wished he could do it to some of the perverts around Konoha, but then again some of them where so pervy they would probably enjoy it.

As he walked he came to a startling conclusion, although it was only a short conversation he had rather enjoyed Kyuubi's company. Hell it he just noticed that he had been calling her 'Kyuu-chan' – that was definitely not the normal response to a supposedly terrifying demon.

The correct response was "OH MY GOD IT IS GOING TO KILL ME – SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME!!"

It definitely was not anything along the line of, "Hi Kyuu-chan, how's tricks?"

Naruto decided that he would like to continue his conversation with the beast and headed home where he could talk to her in peace.

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A/N: Just so you know and can turn back now before you lose your sanity, it IS going where you think it is going.