Hi there readers! It's me again….. And my random crack parody has accompanied me! *Plays cheesy clapping soundtrack* Anyways, You saw the summary on the outside. So yeah.
Here're the characters:
King Stefan- Cavallone Primo
King Hubert- Alaude
Prince Philip- Hibari Kyoya
Princess Aurora- Dino Cavallone
Flora- Romario
Fauna- Lampo
Merryweather- Yamamoto
Maleficent- Byakuran
Useless servants of Byakuran- Black and White spell
Pet Raven/ Diaobolo- Byakuran's dragon
Philip's horse/ Samson- Scuderia
Queen Leah- Random I dunno person
Mukuro Rokudo and Gokudera Hayato as filler characters!
Disclaimer: I don't own Sleeping Beauty, Khr, Taken, or any other things mentioned in here other than my filler scenes. And my HILARITY! (FAILED HILARITY!)
Pairing(s): 18D, 6959, ADae, and mentions of XS.
Rating: T for a shitload of swearing.
See you on the other side!
Sleeping Herbivore
Once upon a time, there was a kingdom. In this kingdom there lived a wonderful King and a beautiful Queen. King and Queen Cavallone were very happy, but they really wanted a child to succeed them. One day, princess- sorry, prince Dino was born. The kingdom rejoiced at the birth of their new future ruler, and the King and Queen held a great party for her- him. And when the Cavallone hold a party, they hold a PARTY. There was the best D.J. money could buy, a banquet that had every food that you could possibly dream of, and enough alcohol to put Xanxus to shame. All around the people of the kingdom were 'dancing' which actually looked a lot like epileptic kids trying to swim. The drunks were playing a beer game at the bar, and a couple tables away the stoners were praising the patch of mould that was growing on the wall.
Alaude's eyes narrowed as he walked stiffly through the giant room, skirting around the crowds at the edges with Hibari trailing behind him. He finally found Cavallone lounging on his throne next to his Queen.
"Cavallone. Where is he?" He inquired, glaring at his long-time 'friend'.
"Oh hey Alaude, long time no see, how're Daemon and the kids?" Cavallone asked, completely ignoring his question.
"Fine. Now where's Dino?" Alaude asked.
"Ha, same as always Alaude. Dino's over there in the cradle… the one surrounded by guards obviously." Cavallone said, raising his eyebrow at the cradle a group of drunks had somehow brought into the castle and had started to play on.
"Hn." Alaude said before bringing Hibari over to said cradle. (No not the one with the drunks!)"This is your betrothed, Dino Cavallone." He said to the child, who was looking at the baby like it was an alien.
"It's not going to be an herbivore, is it?" Hibari asked his father, still looking at Dino like she- HE was from planet mars.
"It probably won't be, Cavallone is actually a pretty good fighter," Alaude answered, glaring over at Cavallone who was talking to the three legendary good faeries.
Cavallone snapped his fingers and the D.J. stopped the music while the royal trumpeters were to play the royal 'everyone shut the hell up' call. Unfortunately, they were all pretty far gone, so it sounded more like a bunch of dying ducks. Cavallone facepalmed and then stood up to address the almost silent hall, almost because the stoners couldn't stop laughing at this hilarious apple, and the drunks hiccupped every once and awhile.
"Since the royal announcer seems to be busy, (the royal announcer looked up from his spot on the floor with bleary eyes,) I guess I'll be announcing this evening." He said, looking around. "Well in case anyone didn't see, there's my buddy, Alaude and his son Kyoya- "
"Cavallone." Alaude growled.
"Alright, alright, Alaude I'll do it properly –"Cavallone said jokingly to Alaude before continuing his speech, "The royal Hibari family arrived a couple minutes ago, and the three good faeries just arrived, to give their gifts to Dino!" He exclaimed while looking at the faeries.
A large clapping noise came from the crowd, and shouts of:
"FUCK YEAH THE FAERIES" and
"SPARKLE BITCHES" and
"DUDE THAT'S FUCKING VAMPIRES" and
"WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?" and
"ACCORDING TO TWILIGHT THERE IS NONE!" and-
"ALRIGHT SHUT THE HELL UP OR I'LL RIP YOUR FACES OFF!" came the yell from a pissed off Cavallone, "MY FUCKING CHILD IS ABOUT TO BE BLESSED BY FAERIES AND I WANT TO VIDEOTAPE IT WITHOUT INTERRUPTIONS!" With that the hall became deadly silent; even the stoners and drunkards shut their mouths.
"Er… okay so I guess I'll just uh… start blessing?" Romario said slowly as he approached the cradle. "For my gift, dear Dino, I give you the gift of beauty… golden hair that shines like the sun, lips so red, they would put a rose to shame….."
"Yare yare…why am I doing this….." Lampo muttered as he went to the cradle next. "I wanna sleep….. O.K., dear Dino, for your gift I give you the gift of song. Your singing shall put even the birds to shame…I wanna sleep…"
"Alright so it's my turn! Dino, my gift is…." Yamamoto was cut off as a giant marshmallow appeared in the middle of the room, almost crushing at least 10 people.
"Yo~ Cavallone!" Byakuran said, smiling at the murderous expression on the man's face.
"I. WAS. VIDEOTAPING. YOU. LITTLE. SHIT. NOW. IT'S. RUINED!" Cavallone roared, while Byakuran backed away slowly.
"Ehehe~ O.K. then…. Well anyways….." Byakuran trailed off, trying to regain some composure, and then straightened up again. "So why didn't you guys invite me to your party? I really wanted to come… But yeah, since you didn't invite me, I'm gonna put a curse on Dino! Isn't that just delightful?" He finished, looking at the faces filled with horror. "So now….. Uh…. Let's see…. O.K. I've got it!" Byakuran explained, "When Dino turns sixteen he will prick his finger on a spinning wheel, and then he'll die! Muwahaha spinning wheel of death~!"
"YOU LEAVE MY SON THE FUCK ALONE!" Cavallone yelled, "And seriously, who the fuck uses a spinning wheel these days? That's so 1800's!"
"Fufufu~ Hey shut up I can do whatever I want! And spinning wheels are ALL the rage, you're just jealous!" Byakuran said with a pout.
Alaude sighed as Cavallone and Byakuran started arguing over spinning wheels, how old they were, trends, and… oh yeah, Dino too.
"Hrmph! Anyways, I'm going to go back to my awesome marshmallow castle now, good luck helping Dino!" Byakuran claimed, turning into a giant marshmallow again and disappearing. (Freeing the people who he had been standing on, who were now gasping for the non-marshmallow covered air.)
"That BASTARD! We have to do something about Dino…." Cavallone looked at his son despairingly, before Romario poked his arm.
"Your majesty, Yamamoto still has his gift to Dino…." He said, before Cavallone cut him off.
"You can lift Dino's curse?!" Cavallone said excitedly, exchanging hopeful looks with his wife.
"No, Byakuran's marshmallow power is too great for that; however, I could exchange her death for another fate…" Yamamoto explained, before approaching Dino's cradle once more. "So, Dino….. you will indeed prick your finger on a spinning wheel on your sixteenth birthday, but instead of death, you will fall into a deep sleep-only to be awakened by your true love's kiss." He finished, waking his katana-wand over the cradle.
"Alright then… at least Dino won't die..…." Cavallone tried to reassure himself and his wife, who was still close to tears.
The three good faeries left the King, queen, and the doomed princess-no- prince guiltily, because they wanted to help Dino more. Romario led them to their chambers, deep in thought. Then, suddenly, inspiration hit him in the face. Literally. A black figure with the word inspiration printed on the front of its shirt flew in through the window, punched Romario in the face, and disappeared.
"Yare yare, what the hell was that?" Lampo wondered, lounging on a chair while Yamamoto helped Romario up.
"Oh that happens whenever I get a really good idea…." Romario trailed off. "Anyways, that's not important- I have an idea to help Dino! Wait-" Romario looked around, used his magic wand to shrink himself, and flew inside a jewellery case.
"Seriously, we're in the middle of an abandoned wing of the castle, no one is going to hear us….." Lampo said, glancing at Yamamoto, who merely shrugged.
"Just get inside the jewellery case." An un-amused Romario said.
"Yare yare whatever…" Lampo said as both he and Yamamoto followed Romario.
"O.K." Romario said once both Lampo and Yamamoto were inside, "my great idea is this; we'll dress up like peasants and live in seclusion with Dino in a forest, then on her sixteenth birthday she will be able to return to the castle, since Byakuran wouldn't have been able to find her, and therefore she won't prick her finger on the spinning wheel and the curse will be overcome!" Romario finished his explanation triumphantly, feeling proud of himself. However, upon looking at the other two his pride dissipated. Lampo was snoring, curled up comfortably on a ring, and Yamamoto was looking as though he had just been explained the theory of quantum mechanics very quickly and with as many challenging words as possible.
"…..just follow my lead…." Romario sighed in defeat.
Soon the fairies had explained their plot to the King Cavallone and his wife, and they had consented; albeit with heavy hearts. The three disguised faeries snuck out of the kingdom with Dino, to go live in a pathetic broken-down hovel of a- *ahem* a quaint cottage in the forest, where Dino would (hopefully) be safe from Byakuran's evil marshmallow ways.
"Wait guys… so Dino's not a girl?" Yamamoto asked once they had settled in.
"Huh?" Lampo inelegantly grunted as he tried to sleep on the couch.
"Well King Cavallone was saying that Dino was his son….." Yamamoto trailed off as Lampo (slowly) sat up.
"Wait but me and Romario gave her….uh, it gifts that are normally bestowed upon princesses….. We couldn't have made that big a mistake….. Could we?" Lampo asked, looking at Yamamoto who only shrugged.
"Well only one way to find out…" Both faeries looked towards Dino, who was sleeping in a cradle near the warmth of the fireplace.
"Hey guys I'm back, the well works and I found some wood… Lampo? Yamamoto?" Romario said as he saw the stricken faces of his fellow faeries.
"Yare yare Romario…..I think we ruined an innocent child's love life…..No, life in general, forever!" Lampo said distraughtly as he buried his face in his hands.
"Really now you're scaring me, what's wrong?!" Romario half-yelled in fear, looking at the two ashen-faced faeries on the floor. "Yamamoto?" He asked imploringly.
"Eh-heh….. Well it seems that Dino is a guy….. And you know, we gave him the gifts that a princess would get…" Yamamoto trailed off as Romario gasped in horror and shock at what he had done.
"We…..we…" Romario sank down to the floor and buried his face in his knees. "Alright guys….. Pact of silence, this never happened. All in agreement?"
Lampo, Yamamoto, and Romario placed their hands in the middle of their little circle, and vowed to never tell Dino why he would be such a naturally effeminate male…
Over the years Dino grew to be a beautiful-handsome woma- man, who had the most gorgeous- manly singing voice anyone has ever heard. Dino was kind to everyone he met, and clumsy beyond all reason. Seriously, the guy could trip over thin air; in fact the only time he wasn't clumsy was when he was with Romario, Lampo, or Yamamoto. Dino was also trained to fight for his own self-defence; (there had been some….. Incidents with some….. People who had mistaken Dino to be a girl and….. Yeah we'll just continue now,) and he was actually pretty good with the whip; when the faeries were around of course. Dino also had a pet turtle named Enzio, who grew when water touched him.
Byakuran had been trying for years to find Dino, but to no avail.
"Dammit, seriously?!" Byakuran Yelled at his subordinates; in this case it was Nosaru and Tazaru. "You've checked EVERYWHERE!? DON'T GIVE ME THAT BULL I KNOW THAT YOU HAVEN'T CHECKED EVERYWHERE!"
"B-but we did Byakuran-sama! We checked all the cradles all over the world and- what am I saying, if we looked for 16 years we wouldn't have come close to seeing all the cradles in the world and Dino wouldn't have stayed a baby forever!" Nosaru said; his voice growing weak as he stared at his boss's darkening face. "I'm just gonna go…" He said with fear in his voice, as Byakuran cracked his knuckles and shoved obscenely large amounts of marshmallows in his mouth, both a sign that he was getting really, really pissed.
"Like hell you are," said the marshmallow lord in a sugar-sweet tone, which scared his subordinates more than his angry one, before grabbing his box animal and ordering it to attack them. He
then sighed as his subordinates' screaming faded into the background, and he thought, "How the hell am I going to find Dino…?" He decided to get his box animal to search for him in the end, and pulled his dragon back to his chair once his subordinates were dragging their beaten bodies out of the room. "O.K., you're the only one I can trust not to screw up the job….. Go search for Dino!" Byakuran said, opening the window for his box animal. Once he had left, Byakuran opened a new bag of marshmallows and started eating them….. "Hm….. I wonder how I don't get fat from eating these all the time….."
As Byakuran pondered to secrets of the Khr universe, his box animal randomly decided to start searching in the forest. Because Dino just is THAT unlucky. But while the box animal flew to the forest, in the cottage, the three faeries were planning to give Dino the best birthday ever.
Dino yawned as sh- he walked down the stairs and into the living room of the cottage.
"Good morning Romario, Yamamoto, and Lampo!" She- He said with a smile.
The three faeries looked up from their book: How to make a great Sweet Sixteenth party and watch out, because if you actually need this book chances are they're going to know and not be surprised, but you can try at any rate; and promptly slammed it closed and shoved it under the table.
"Good morning Dino! How are you?" Yamamoto said with a smile.
"Morning Dino! How did you sleep?" Romario asked.
"Yare yare how can you be so alert in the mornings…?" A tired Lampo queried.
"I'm doing wonderfully Yamamoto, I slept great Romario, and I guess I'm a morning person Lampo." Dino said cheerfully.
"Haha, so Dino today's your-" Yamamoto began to say when Romario clapped his hand over the others' mouth.
"Uh Dino what Yamamoto was trying to say is we need to you to go…" Romario looked around desperately and tried to think of something, anything to get Dino out of the house with. "Uh…. You need to go get us some berries! Yeah, that's it!" Romario laughed nervously.
"But….. Romario I went out to pick some berries yesterday…." Dino said confusedly.
"We need more, because uh, we just ran out! You know Lampo's appetite!" Romario said, grabbing the basket and Dino's coat before pushing the suspicious fema- male towards the door.
"O.K., I understand Romario, how many should I get?" Dino asked, choosing not to point out the bowl of fresh berries that were sitting right in the middle of the table. "Seriously, how did Romario miss that? I guess they really want me out of the house."
"As many as you can!" Yamamoto said, finally catching on to how Romario was trying to get Dino out of the house so that they could prepare her- his surprise birthday party.
"Took him long enough" Romario thought.
"Uh, O.K. Any specific types of berries or can I pick?" Dino asked.
"Strawberries!" Lampo yelled, having waken up from a terrible nightmare where there were mutated strawberries trying to eat them all.
Everyone looked at Lampo weirdly, and then Dino said
"Well….. Alright then… Bye everyone!" And with the slam of a door and a fall down the steps, Dino was gone. (By the time Dino got outside the faeries were too far in the house to be seen.) "Huh, I wonder what those guys are planning for my birthday…" Dino pondered to herself- himself as she- he got further into the forest.
"Phew, I'm sure that Dino suspects something, but it'll still be surprise when sh- he comes home and sees what we did!" Romario said confidently, Yamamoto nodding in agreement and Lampo trying to fall asleep again on the table.
"LET'S GET TO WORK!" Romario yelled, effectively waking up Lampo, (he fell off the chair and onto the floor with a large thud,) and cheering himself and Yamamoto.
"Yare yare….. What should I do; what's the job with the least amount of work, and involves sitting?" Lampo asked Romario who had pulled the heavy tome out from underneath the table.
"Well the easiest job would be to act as the mannequin for the dress I'm sewing Dino, but that involves standing for a very long time, so I think baking the cake would be your best option. " Romario replied, flipping through the book and sliding the recipe over to Lampo.
"Wait, you're making a dress for Dino?" Lampo said confusedly, "Won't that give her- him even more gender distinction issues?"
"Well if SOMEONE had picked up the book that was meant for boys, we wouldn't need to make her- him a dress!" Romario said angrily and glared at Lampo.
"What? I picked the first one about 'Sweet sixteenths' and 'Birthday's' I could find. It was a lot easier that way." Lampo said with a shrug.
"Yeah, well now it's too late to go to the store and get the CORRECT book and until I acquire magical abilities that make me able to make a suit, I'm going with the only option I have. At least it'll look 'royal' enough until we get to the castle and change her- him into a suit." Romario said with a 'this is final' tone.
"Yare yare, well at least I tried to save Dino's pride. Hmph." And with that Lampo turned to stare at the recipe.
"Where the heck did Yamamoto go anyways?" Romario said, looking around.
"Hey guys! I got the wands!" A very, VERY dense Yamamoto said loudly, cheerfully, and in full view of every wide-open window in the room.
"YAMAMOTO!" Romario yelled, grabbing the wands and stashing them underneath some laundry, then proceeding to run and close all the windows tightly.
"What? I was only getting the wands so that we would be able to finish Dino's birthday party preparations before sh- he got home…." Yamamoto said, genuinely confused.
"You idiota! We are trying to hide from Byakuran's minions, do you want to give our positions away?!" Romario said angrily, waving his arms for emphasis.
"Oh yeah…" Yamamoto said, with a look of dawning comprehension on his face.
Romario facepalmed and then said, "Alright go stand on that chair over there, I need to make Dino's dress."
"O.K." Yamamoto said, standing on the small chair, back straight and arms pinned to his sides.
Romario proceeded to rip out the book pages that had the dress instructions on them, figuring that they wouldn't be using the book again anyways. And then he started to read, getting the fabric as he went.
Meanwhile, Dino was walking through the forest, tripping over the occasional root, singing all the while. (But every time he fell the beautiful singing would be punctuated with: "CRAP!" or, "OH SHIIII-" or, "OW!") Anyways, the birds and her- his other forest friends came out the greet Dino, enjoying her- his beautiful singing. Dino happily played with the animals, saying hello to them, and asking them how they were doing. Then Dino saw Mukuro and Gokudera, who were two people that often played in the forest, walking through the glen.
"Good morning Mukuro, Gokudera! I haven't seen you guys in a while, how are you both?" Dino greeted them.
"Kufufu~ Nice to see you Bronco*, and I'm doing quite well." Mukuro said with a sadistic smirk, as always.
"Morning Bronco, I'm fine; well I was until this idiot showed up." Gokudera said, pointing at Mukuro with his thumb.
"Kufufu~ Aww don't say that Hayato, you know you love me." Mukuro said, hugging Gokudera from the side and successfully pinning his arms so he couldn't escape.
"No I don't you Pineapple Bastard!" Gokudera yelled, squirming futilely in the illusionists' grasp.
"Well you guys are getting along as usual!" Dino laughed as he saw them fighting, then sh- he asked, "Oh, Mukuro I meant to ask, have they found your brother's betrothed yet? You know the one from the Cavallone kingdom?"
"Kufufu~ well I overheard my mother and father talking the other day, and they were saying something about Hibari Kyoya's** fiancée returning on the morrow, which I find interesting, since it was told that the heir simply vanished one night. I was going to listen some more, but my mother and father are VERY skilled at seeing through illusions… Even with my illusions being used to their full potential I can only fool my father for a short time, and my mother always sees right through them; being an illusionist and all. So I was caught in the end, and banished to my room." Mukuro said, hugging Gokudera still tighter, the latter struggling and trying in vain to bite his arm.
"Wow! Well I hope Kyoya is happy! He's been gone sixteen years, hasn't he?" Dino said.
"Yup. Hopefully Hibari will be happy, my brother can be very….. Picky about whom he likes. Kufufu~" Mukuro said, patting Gokudera on the head.
"Oi Pineapple Bastard will you let me go now?!" Gokudera cut in, yelling at Mukuro.
"Kufufu~ Nope." Mukuro replied cheerfully.
"Alright guys, well I have to go find some more strawberry bushes," Dino said, "My family*** is preparing for my birthday in my absence, they told me to go out and 'pick strawberries' and I don't want to get home too late!"
"Oh yeah I forgot it was your birthday. Happy birthday then, bronco- DAMMIT MUKURO STOP MOLESTING ME!" Gokudera ended up yelling, finally succeeding in pushing away the pineapple.
"Kufufu~ C'mon Hayato, we both know you like it…" Mukuro said while looking evilly at the furiously blushing Gokudera.
"N-NO I DON'T!" Gokudera yelled, mentally cursing himself for stuttering.
"Kufufu~" Mukuro laughed, walking towards the steadily retreating Gokudera.
Dino sweatdropped and then said, "Alright then… I guess I'll see you guys later…."
"Kufufu~ Bye, and happy birthday." Mukuro said, before successfully pinning Gokudera to a tree.
Dino left before her- his poor innocent mind could be scarred any more than it already had. Dino finally came to a glen with many more strawberry bushes, and started to sing a song, based off of a dream that sh- he had about someone she- he loved, although he couldn't really tell what the mysterious person had looked like.
Meanwhile, Hibari Kyoya had decided to ride through the forest of Namimori, watching for rule-breakers and enjoying the peaceful quietness of the forest. Then, he heard beautiful singing coming from the depths of the forest. Hibari actually enjoyed the singing, but, being Hibari Kyoya, he would never admit that. "That herbivore who is singing must be bitten to death." Hibari said to Scuderia****, his horse. (A/N: What do you mean it's not normal to talk to horses? Shut up.)So they started off towards where the mysterious singing was coming from. However, when they got close Hibari and Scuderia fell into a shallow pond. Hibari was furious but took off his coat, boots, and some random hat that he had on for no apparent reason. He didn't want to catch cold after all. He decided to lie in the sun and take a quick nap to dry him and his clothes off.
Mukuro and Gokudera were walking (arguing) when Mukuro saw his brothers' clothes drying in the sun. He then heard what Dino was singing about and got an evil idea.
"Kufufu~ Hey Hayato want to see Bronco get bitten to death?" Mukuro said with a smirk.
Gokudera looked at Mukuro suspiciously and then at where he was pointing.
"Wha- Oh… Wow really?" Gokudera rolled his eyes and said, "Such a great birthday present. You're the best friend anyone could EVER have."
"Kufufu~ Aw, you think? I bet they'll just LOVE each-other." Mukuro said, grabbing Hibari's clothes while Gokudera huffed and crossed his arms.
"I'm going to laugh when you get beaten up pineapple idiot." Gokudera said, watching with slight interest as Mukuro ran over near where Dino was, but staying hidden in the shadows. Mukuro then used an illusion to make it seem as though the clothes were being held up by random animals, to make it look like they were dancing. And Dino simply laughed and took it into stride. Gokudera and Mukuro both sweatdropped but continued watching as Dino sung even more beauti- handsomely and danced with her- his 'dream prince'. (Tripping on air every now and then of course.)
Meanwhile, Hibari had woken up to find his clothes missing. Since the source of the singing was close by, he decided to check there first. He saw a beautiful woman dancing with….. Wait were those his clothes?! Hibari growled and decided to take back his belongings; no matter how beautiful the woman was, she wouldn't be let off easily. Hibari stomped towards the blissfully ignorant woman, pulling out his steel tonfas as he went.
Dino opened her- his eyes and saw a very dark, evil-looking person advancing, holding some sort of weapon in a very threatening manner.
"Uh hello there good sir….. What are you doing?" Dino asked nervously.
"Herbivore why do you have my clothes?" Hibari growled at the…. Wait a minute….."Holy crap I can't believe that's a man…" Hibari thought, masking his surprised expression.
"Eh? Your clothes-" A look of understanding dawned on Dino's face as sh- he looked at the pile of clothes that were currently on the ground. "Oh, I'm really sorry, I guess I got carried away…." Dino said, hurrying to pick up the clothes, and dropping all of them right after he finished. "Crap! Sorry…." Dino apologized again and tried to collect the pile of clothes….. Again. Hibari sighed after Dino dropped his clothes for what seemed like the seventeenth time, and grabbed the now slightly dirty pile when Dino picked them up again, just before he could drop them.
"Now, herbivore, I'm going to bite you to death." Hibari said, holding up his tonfas again.
"What?! But I said I was sorry!" Dino exclaimed, barely managing to dodge the other's attack. He sighed and then pulled out his whip, completely forgetting his clumsiness. Luckily, because Mukuro was intrigued by the idea of Dino and Hibari fighting at their full potential, he made an illusion of Romario, sitting underneath a tree; within Dino's peripheral vision of course.
"Romario! Watch out, this guy's dangerous!" Dino yelled, and then turned to hit Hibari while dodging one of his attacks, all signs of clumsiness gone.
Hibari raised his eyebrow at this sudden change, and smirked as the herbivore's attacks got more consecutive and powerful. "This could get interesting…" He thought to himself, a shadow of a smirk crossing his face.
Gokudera and Mukuro were watching amazedly; Gokudera's jaw was close to hitting the ground.
"Kufufu~ Well I never knew the Bronco was so strong…. To hold her- his won against my brother for so long is truly a feat to be admired….." Mukuro mumbled, watching the fight as Dino started to gain the upper hand.
"Shit….." Gokudera said, his vocabulary being lowered to mere swear words as he saw Dino winning. "Fucking hell…."
After a few more minutes of awesomely epic fighting, Gokudera noticed something.
"Hey, Mukuro." He said, apparently gaining his massive vocabulary back for a few moments.
"Kufufu~ What is it?" Mukuro said, turning his face towards Gokudera but keeping his eyes on the fight.
"Doesn't it look like they're….. Almost dancing?" Gokudera said, giving his utmost attention to the battle.
"Kufufu~ Incredible, now that you mention it….." Mukuro agreed, nodding his head as he noticed the two's natural grace as they twisted and attacked one another ferociously.
The two watched in silence (mostly) and awe as Dino used her-his whip to rip the steel tonfas from Hibari's grasp and tie his wrists together.
"Phew, I'm all tired out….. That was some fight sir! You're really good!" Dino said, smiling tiredly but still radiating happiness.
"Hn…." Hibari muttered, untangling his wrists and eyeing the herbivore- (or was it carnivore?) with something akin to respect.
But he's Hibari Kyoya, that's impossible. No, it was the fact that no one had ever beaten him before, not even his brother***** and being beaten by this simple peasant intrigued him.
"So what's your name?" Dino asked, and then stated, "Mine's Bronco."
Hibari raised his eyebrow at the curious name, and decided to not tell the strange fighter who he was. He's Hibari Kyoya, he can do whatever he wanted after all.
"Herbivore." Hibari said coldly.
"Wha- But I just told you my name, it's-" Dino rambled, (Mukuro had taken away the illusion of Romario after the fight had ended and gone to… walk with Gokudera. Yeah, just walking. No rape- WALKING.)
"Herbivore. Where do you live?" Hibari said coolly, in more of a demanding tone than a questioning one.
"Huh? Why would you want to know that? And I still don't know your name…"Dino trailed off as the strange man stepped closer, placing one of his tonfas against her-his throat in a threatening manner.
"I wish to have a rematch tonight. And this time I will be fully prepared, herbivore." Hibari said in a cold tone.
"Right! I l-live in the cottage in the glen- Oh wow look h-how time flies! I've gotta get home!" Dino stuttered, running away towards the general direction of her- his abode, tripping over dust specs as sh-he went.
Hibari glared at the herbivore's back, stifling an amused smirk when the red-faced male came back to grab her-his basket full of berries, and then running (tripping) away again.
"This herbivore is interesting…" Hibari said to no one in particular, walking towards where Scuderia was; intending to return to his father's friends' castle to tell his father of his plans to defeat the strange herbivore.
Meanwhile, at the castle King Cavallone and King Alaude were enjoying an abnormally large feast, celebrating the fact that Dino was returning.
"Cavallone, how much food did you tell your cooks to make?" Alaude asked, looking down the huge table that was teetering on the verge of breaking from food.
"I told them it would be a celebratory dinner for you and I, they're acting like I invited Lambo as well….." Cavallone said, looking in shock at all the food.
"….How can they expect us to eat all of this?" Alaude asked, while Cavallone just looked at him and shrugged.
"Well anyways….. Let's just celebrate! My little boy's finally coming home!" Cavallone practically yelled, jumping up and down excitedly, ignoring Alaude's disturbed stare.
"Get a hold of yourself Cavallone." Alaude stated coldly, glaring (with slight amusement) at the dancing man.
"Oh come one Alaude, lighten up I haven't seen Dino in 16 years! How would you feel if you didn't see Hibari, or Mukuro, or Chrome for that long?" Cavallone said, swaying to an invisible tune now, and scaring their waiter.
"Kyoya would be fine on his own, he wouldn't be weak enough to fall victim to a curse. Same with Rokudo, although the concept of not having to bail him out of jail every week sounds pleasing, and Chrome is stronger than one would think, she would also be able to not be cursed." Alaude said boredly, putting some form of cooked meat on his plate.
"Hey Dino was only a child, I'm sure he's much stronger now….." Cavallone said with a pout, "And I doubt any of your children could deflect a curse at that age!"
"Yes they could." Alaude simply stated, "They're Hibaris."
Cavallone sighed, before brightening again and filling up two cups of his best wine.
"A toast! To the soon-to-be happy couple and the union of our families!" Cavallone said proudly, offering Alaude a cup.
"Why should I toast to that Cavallone…." Alaude said, but accepted the cup anyways, because Cavallone's wine was top-quality.
The waiter looked at the two talking casually; drinking their wine, and decided that since they were distracted he could take a sip of the perfect drink he was serving. He took a tentative sip when they weren't looking, then another. Ten minutes later he was chugging every bottle he could find, and pouring even more into his ukulele. At the time it seemed like a good place to hide his booze; then the two Kings wouldn't know he was drinking and he wouldn't get in trouble. He continued to praise his cleverness as he drank himself into a stupor, Cavallone and Alaude watching with amusement all the while.
"Cavallone your waiters certainly are lightweights." Alaude said, raising his eyebrows at the man staggering around and drinking from his ukulele.
"Yeah… *hic* I can't imagine why…." Cavallone said drunkenly, downing another glass of wine.
Alaude simply sighed and had another glass as well. Contrary to popular belief, he was not a lightweight; he could take his alcohol very well. Most thought that since Kyoya wasn't able to hold hid drink that he got it from his father. Daemon, in fact, was where Kyoya got his inability to stand any amount of alcohol from. Cavallone also happened to be a lightweight, something he would never admit, always claiming that Alaude was just unable to get drunk.
"Whatever. So how soon are they to be married?" Alaude asked, always business as usual.
"Huh? Married? *hic* Doesn't it seem a little soon to be getting them hitched? *hic* I mean, I'll finally be getting my baby back after all these years, can't it *hic* wait?" Cavallone said slowly, looking at Alaude with a pleading expression.
"I've got people working on their future castle, and the wedding had better be soon." Alaude said callously, glaring at Cavallone.
"Oh c'mon Alaude…." Cavallone said pleadingly, abandoning his drink.
"It's not like you won't be able to see him, you can visit him, and he can you." Alaude said, "And besides, children all grow up. He's 16."
"But I never got a chance to raise *hic* him! I didn't get to see *hic* see him grow up….. So *hic* it's not fair!" Cavallone said, crouching on the ground and pouting.
"It'll be fine Cavallone. Besides, you have no need to worry; if he's anything like you, he'll be visiting every day for 'family bonding' anyways." Alaude said, trying to make the man cheer up and get off the floor.
Cavallone jumped up and ran around the table excitedly yelling, "YAY THIS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME MY LITTLE BABY'S GOING TO BE MARRIED AND I'LL SEE HIM EVERY DAY!"
Alaude simply facepalmed as the waiter and Cavallone started singing the Pokémon theme song….. Before fainting (in a very manly fashion) and falling underneath the table.
As this was happening, Lampo, Yamamoto, and Romario were finishing, or attempting to finish, preparing Dino's birthday party. Without the help of their magic, it was a disaster.
"Yare yare….. Romario is the cake supposed to be melting all over the table? Because that's not in the book." Lampo said, looking at the other frazzled-looking faerie who whipped his head around in a rather alarming fashion, accompanied by a resounding crack.
"What! What do you mean the cake's melting?" Romario said quickly, wincing from the pain in his neck.
"Well it was supposed to be one of those multi-layered cakes, right? But it's kind of slowly imploding… To be honest I don't even know how I got all the layers on it in the first place…. Yare yare can I just eat it?" Lampo said boredly, oblivious from Romario's obvious distress.
"Holy crap Lampo, how in hell's name did you manage to do that? Didn't you follow the instructions?" Romario said exasperatedly.
"Well….." Lampo said, having a flashback.
"Yare yare…. O.k. so I put in two cups of flour….. I think I'm supposed to have a special cup to do that….. But it's on the other side of the kitchen. (Translation: Five feet away.) Well I'm sure the size of a normal cup will be close enough….. I'll put two different-sized ones in there; one of them is bound to be correct…..O.k. now milk….. Huh I can't read how much; there's a stain here. Hey isn't this book new…? Yare yare whatever, I just want to get this over with. Alright now mix…. I'll stir it fully twice….. That'll be enough. And now I have to fold in two eggs? Sure thing. O.k. eggs folded….. Now…. Sugar, water, and all this stuff. Wow this is going to take forever. I'll just skip these instructions; no one will notice I'm sure. Yare yare, finally. Now all I have to do is put them in pans in the oven….. And then decorate it with the pre-made frosting…"
As Lampo finished explaining what he had done to make the cake; Romario felt nearly faint from shock. He sat there on floor for a couple of minutes before deciding to speak up.
"Y-you're kidding me…. Right?" He said, looking at Lampo who was now eating the last crumbs of the cake- "LAMPO STOP STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Romario yelled, pulling Lampo away.
"Yare yare….. It was a mess anyways. We couldn't have given that to Dino." Lampo said calmly, licking his fingers.
"Oh no….. What are we to do?" Romario said worriedly, pulling the ends of his short hair in desperation.
"Haha, well I don't know how pulling your hair will help, but it looks to me as though we could use some magic!" Yamamoto said smilingly, almost being crushed by the mountain of fabric, ribbons, and bows piled on his quivering frame.
Romario looked around: at the mess of fabric that was supposed to be a dress, the pile of crumbs and half-melted candles that had once been an excuse of a cake, and at the dirtiness of the house. "Fine, fine! I give up! Let's get the wands." Romario said, letting his head hit the table.
"Yay!" Yamamoto cheered, squeezing out from underneath the slop of fabric and running up to the secret cupboard, where the wands were hidden.
"Whoopee. Now I can make a good cake without any effort at all." Lampo said, yawning as he did so.
"Wait, before we do we have to make sure we're not caught!" Romario said, rushing to close all the windows and block every source of light that the small room offered.
"Uh, Romario… We're in the middle of a forest….. Yare yare you don't have to block up that tiny hole in the wall. Seriously, no one's going to find us…" Lampo said, watching Romario rush about.
"Excuses! What if someone sees a glint of colour or something! We have to be sure; we can't spoil this on Dino's birthday!" Romario said with pride, having finished his mission.
"I got the wands!" Yamamoto said, running down the stairs holding a sword, a wok, and a normal fairy-tale wand, because no one knows what weapon Romario uses.
"Alright, let's do this! Yamamoto, clean the house! Lampo, make the cake! And I'll finish the dress!" Romario said, grabbing his wand from Yamamoto.
"Yare yare….. O.k. so I'll just wave my wand and let the cake make itself….. Now to sleep…" Lampo said; nodding off in his chair as the inanimate objects started their work.
"Alright mops, sponges, towels! Do your thing!" Yamamoto said cheerfully, waving his sword around as though he were cutting people in half.
"Yes, yes an incision there and….. Hey give me back the book!" Romario yelled as he was owned by the scissors and measuring tapes that were currently making Dino's dress.
Soon the dress, a beautiful shade of pink, was finished: the delicious and tempting cake done, and the floors and walls shone like the sun.
"Aaaaaah Yamamoto what did you clean the house with? Why is it giving off light?" Romario yelled, shielding his poor eyes.
"Wow sorry, I guess we scrubbed a little too hard, eh guys?" Yamamoto addressed the cleaning items, while Romario sighed at his stupidity.
"Yamamoto the inanimate objects can't talk you do know…." Romario said exasperatedly.
Yamamoto gasped and shielded the cleaning items from Romario.
"They have feelings too! That's so mean of you!" He said, with a pouting look on his face.
"Yare yare, fight after you dim the room, I can't sleep with all this light." Lampo's voice drifted over from the blanket that he had been hiding under in the corner.
Romario rolled his eyes and waved his wand, returning the room to its proper lighting but keeping the cleanliness just as it had been.
"Hm-hm hm….. O.k. now I won't trip over the steps this time; I won't I won't I wo- OH NO!" The sound of Dino returning home and tripping over the front steps suddenly became clear to the three bickering faeries; their faces ashen: they distinguished all the lights, hid their wands, and jumped into the corner to surprise Dino when sh- he came in.
A painful-sounding thud came from the doorframe, and they faeries winced as they heard Dino make a whimpering, kicked puppy sound.
"That dumb step, and why does wood have to be so hard….. And painful… Oh whatever, now where's my keys…?" Dino muttered, trying he- his best to find the keys to the front door.
The faeries were starting to get pins and needles from waiting so long for Dino to come in, so Romario hissed in a nonchalant tone:
"The door's unlocked!"
"Oh yeah, the door's unlocked… I forgot, thanks uh….." Dino trailed off, whipping he- his head around in vain to find the source of the voice; then shrugging and turning the doorknob.
"SURPRISE!" Yelled the three faeries, jumping out from their hiding spot and turning on the lights simultaneously.
Dino jumped, and then landed rather ungracefully on he- his ass.
"Woah! Guys! Don't jump out…." Dino stopped speaking out of amazement as her- his eyes scanned the cottage room. "Wait….. Is this all for me?!" Sh- He said excitedly, jumping up from the floor and striding towards the cake; which was lit with exactly 16 candles.
Romario noticed a random mop that was trying to imitate its cousin, who coincidentally happened to be from the set of Fantasia. His eyes bugged out, and he quickly slapped Yamamoto gently, to let him know that he hadn't 'put away' all the cleaning items. Well he tried to slap him gently, but out of nerves he kind of punched him so hard that he flew into the wall. Oh well.
"Huh? Oh no Yamamoto, are you O.K.?" Dino said worriedly, rushing over to help Yamamoto up. While sh- he was distracted, Romario quickly reversed the spell on the mop and chucked in the general area of the closet, sighing with relief.
"Oh I'm fine, really Dino don't fuss over me; it's your day after all!" Yamamoto said with a smile, encouraging Dino to return to he- his celebrating.
"Well….. O.k. then. If you're sure…." Dino trailed off, sienna eyes alight with happiness and scanning the room once more. "Uh….. Romario, Lampo, Yamamoto….." Dino said in an awkward tone.
"Hm? What?" Romario said, the other two nodding in agreement. Well Yamamoto did anyways, Lampo was too lazy.
"Why…." Dino seemed to be at a loss for what to say; but then closed her- his eyes and breathed deeply, which for some reason helped he- him. "Why is there a pink dress over there?" Dino finished, wincing at the three faerie's guilty faces.
"Hah- well about that…." Yamamoto said, looking at Romario for help.
"You see, there was this…." Romario gulped at the suddenly fearful look on Dino's face.
"Wait, so this IS for me…?" Dino said in a tone which was practically begging what sh- he had just said to not be true.
"Yeah. See, we needed to make you something royal-looking for you to wear to the castle because it'd be disrespectful for you not to do so. Romario tried to find something befitting for a man but he couldn't and had to pick up instructions for this instead. We didn't have any other coloured-fabrics, so you have to wear a pink dress until you get home." Lampo suddenly broke in, shocking the others into a silence. "Yare yare now if you don't mind I would like to get some sleep now." And with that, Lampo fell unconscious on the couch. There was several more minutes of awkward silence before Dino said with great confusion;
"Uhm, what does he mean by castle? And how I have to look 'royal'? And this IS my home…. What are you talking about?"
Romario and Yamamoto looked at each-other with apprehension, before Romario turned away and sighed.
"Dino….. There's something we've been keeping from you." Romario said quietly, "I'm going to try and break this to you gently. You're the famed Prince of the Cavallone kingdom. The one who was lost sixteen years ago."
"Haha, Romario I don't think that was really breaking it to he- him gently….." Yamamoto said worriedly, looking at Dino's awestruck face.
Dino stared at Romario in shock, not comprehending what he was saying. "So…. Wait what?! And you guys never told me? What the actual heck guys!" Sh- He said with a frown, "I wouldn't have told anyone! And why am I not living in the castle if I'm a 'prince'?"
"Well, it was because of the curse that was placed upon you a while back, you see? The evil marshmallow lord Byakuran-" Yamamoto was cut off with Dino's laughter.
"Aahaha! Evil MARSHMALLOW lord?! How can anything associated with marshmallows be evil?! That's hilarious!" Dino continued to giggle as Romario facepalmed and Yamamoto rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.
"Yeah, but Byakuran really is evil. Haha, I know, the whole marshmallow thing kind of makes it seem the opposite, but it's true. Anyways…" Yamamoto said, his face turning serious once more, "Byakuran crashed your birthday party when you were a child, because your parents didn't invite him. He was very…..peeved about it so he cursed you. And the curse….. Says that you'll…..fallintoadeepsleepattheageof sixteenbecauseyouprickyourfi ngeronaspinningwheel."
"Uh, what was that last part Yamamoto?" Dino asked, eyes popping slightly.
"Well, he said that you'll basically be put under a spell that will cause you to fall into a deep sleep….Until your true love comes and gives you a true loves' kiss. But that won't happen, because we've hidden you from Byakuran." Romario summed up.
"I….I…." Dino seemed to be at a loss as for what to say; for this incident had turned he- his life completely upside-down.
"We understand that you must be shocked, but we should really get going soon, we don't want to be late for your parents after all…." Romario said, patting Dino on the shoulder.
"No, it's O.K… I'm just a little mixed up right now….." Dino said, biting he- his lip. "WAIT!" Sh-he suddenly yelled, consequently making Romario Lampo and Yamamoto jump about five feet in the air with surprise.
"Ahaha, what is it Dino?" Yamamoto said, rubbing the bump on his head.
"Yeah Dino, why would you suddenly do that?" Romario said, plodding over to the fridge to grab an ice-pack.
"Mrphmfgh." Lampo mumbled, whatever he was trying to say undistinguishable because he had jumped so high his head had gotten stuck in the celling.
"Well I promised…Someone… That I would have a fight here….. I feel really bad just up and leaving him, I mean the poor guy will have to come all this way for nothing." Dino said, much to the confusion of Yamamoto and Romario, who were currently engaged in trying to pull Lampo out of the celling.
"What do you mean? Who did you see?" Asked Romario worriedly, wincing as Lampo landed on him and Yamamoto.
"Oh, some guy; we fought and I won, but he was really tough!" Dino said, a curious tone in his voice, "How do you not remember? You were there after all….."
"Uh….."Romario said intelligently, thinking of how this could possibly be. "Ah wait, it was probably Mukuro, Dino's friend who set this up….. That would explain why 'I' was there….. But who was the other man who fought Dino?" Romario pondered; eyes far off in the distance. After a while however, Dino and the others became worried, and tried to wake him up.
"Uh Romario, are you o.k.?" Dino asked nervously, shaking Romario's shoulders.
"Hm? Oh I'm fine. Now…. " Romario trailed off as he looked out the doorway at the twilight-coloured sky ("Crap. How long was I out for?!") before springing up and shouting, "We're going to be late! Everyone get ready, hurry, hurry!"
And so the three faeries and Dino ran quickly to the castle, under the cover of the quickly-darkening sky. None noticed Byakuran's dragon, flying off to tell his master of where Dino and the others were.
Once they reached their destination, (Dino attracting many a stare from he- his ridiculously pink dress,) Romario, Yamamoto, and Lampo led Dino to the room where sh- he was to meet he- his parents.
"Yare yare, stay here Dino we'll be right back." Lampo said lazily, trailing after Romario and Yamamoto at a snails' pace.
"O.k…" Dino said quietly, still mortified at her- his outfit and guilty at leading the stranger astray. Suddenly, a pulsating white light around what looked like a marshmallow appeared….. Right where the bricks of a fireplace had been!
"Wh-who's there!?" Dino shrieked out of surprise, silently cursing her- himself for the unmanly cry.
"Fufu~ Oh hey there- wait whaaaaat?!" Byakuran said; eyes widening as he saw Dino. "Uh, hello there ma'am, would you happen to know where the Prince Dino Cavallone may be?" He said, smoothing over his error. "O.k., that spy is sooooo going to be thrown into my marshmallow fluff moat later…. I asked where Dino was, not this random woman!"
"W-well I am him good sir….. Are you a magician? I have heard of their great feats; however I was never able to see them for the want of money to pay….. I never imagined illusions of such magnitude could be performed by you! I have seen my friend Mukuro preform some, but none like making a wall disappear!" Dino said with an impressed expression on he- his face; deciding to ignore the fact that the stranger had thought he was a girl.
"…. Uh yeah, I'm a magician….. In fact I'm supposed to surprise you, Prince Cavallone, and lead you to your parents. Won't you come along?" Byakuran said, quickly formulating a plan to trick Dino. "I never expected Dino to be a cross-dresser… Damn sh- he sure looks like a woman… Ah well, the sooner I get this over with, the better." He thought, smirking slightly, as the two started walking down the passageway.
"Woah, wait will I be changing before I see my parents? I don't want them to see me like this…." Dino said worriedly, suddenly stopping.
"Fufu~ Yeah, The changing room's on the way!" Byakuran said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Hm…. There's something off about this guy…. Ah well, if my parents sent him I'm sure there's nothing to worry about!" Dino thought, smiling once again and continuing he- his previous pace.
Soon Dino and Byakuran had reached the room with the spinning wheel, and as Dino's eyes widened in horror, remembering her- his guardians' tale of the spinning wheel curse and the marshmallow sorcerer; Byakuran pushed the poor prince- prince onto the pointy end. The effect was immediate; Dino's eyes rolled upward and a not-so-manly noise was uttered before the blonde fell to the floor in a dead faint.
"Yay~ I finally did it! That's for insulting my fashion sense bitch!" Byakuran yelled triumphantly, spinning on his heel and transforming once more into a levitating marshmallow; just as Romario, Yamamoto, and Lampo ran, panting, up the stairs.
"DINO!" All three faeries yelled, running towards the unmoving figure.
"Oh no…." Romario said worriedly, cradling Dino's head while Yamamoto checked the princes- prince's pulse.
"Sh-He's still alive…. Just in a comatose state." Yamamoto affirmed, sitting up.
"Yare yare….. What are we to do? Will we be able to find Dino's true love?" Lampo asked, looking at the other two with an anxious expression.
"We're going to have to!" Romario stood up, a fiery aura surrounding him.
"Hm, right!" Yamamoto and Lampo said, standing up. Yamamoto carried Dino bridal-style to he- his room, where they lay he- him down on the large bed. They then proceeded to come up with an amazing plan….. Well at least they tried. For 2 hours all three sat around and tried their hardest to think of something, but to no avail.
"Well we could- nah, that won't work…" Romario grumbled.
"Yare yare we could just…. Nope that's illegal." Lampo said quietly, causing Yamamoto and Romario to raise their eyebrows.
"Haha well we could just… What was I saying?" Yamamoto said, staring off into space while Romario facepalmed.
Then suddenly Romario's face lit up, and Yamamoto and Lampo cringed, realizing what was about to occur. Sure enough, the black figure of 'inspiration' jumped in through Dino's window, delivered a swift uppercut to Romario's jaw- "OW!"- and ran off.
Lampo pulled a grinning Romario to his feet, Yamamoto looking curiously after the 'inspiration' figure. "Yare yare Romario, you must have gotten a really good idea, I think your nose is broken…. Impressive considering your jaw was punched…" Lampo said calmly, leaving Yamamoto to fix Romario's nose with his katana-wand.
"Yeah, this one will knock your socks off, and we'll be able to wake Dino up!" Romario said triumphantly once he was healed.
Yamamoto grinned, and even Lampo smiled slightly with relief, it was good to know that they were going to be able to bring Dino back.
"O.k., so here's the plan;" Romario said, getting himself and the others pumped up with his tone, "we put the whole kingdom to sleep, so it will seem like nothing happened and there won't be widespread despair on the big celebration day. Once they're all asleep, they will be trapped within time, like Dino, and we will have time to find her- his true love. We'll discuss more about finding Dino's love once we finish our first task." Romario finished his explanation with a firm nod, smiling with pride for his plan.
Yamamoto and Lampo exchanged looks, Lampo pulling his jaw off the floor long enough to say, "Romario…. Are you sure that guy didn't give you a concussion? That has to be the single most stupid idea in the history of ever….."
"Hey! It's a great idea!" Romario said, eyes flashing angrily, "And I don't suppose you have a better one!"
"Maa maa guys, let's just calm down, O.k.?" Yamamoto said, anxious to break up the fight.
"Yare yare, o.k. so I don't have an idea….. You know what whatever; as long as I can be lazy I'm cool with it." Lampo said, reclining on the floor.
"So let's get to it then!" Romario said, standing up. "And Lampo, get your lazy ass off that floor and out that fucking window before I have to come over there and MAKE you do it."
Lampo shuddered and flew faster than a horny Xanxus chasing a certain loud-mouthed shark. Yamamoto and Romario sweatdropped as Lampo actually narrated his departure using that phrase above.
"Yeah, so let's uh… Start." Romario finished lamely, flying off to take the inside of the castle, while Yamamoto helped Lampo with the villagers outside.
"So Alaude, you're saying that Hibari won't be coming, because he'll be off fighting? With some peasant in the forest, at an unknown cottage?" Cavallone asked, rubbing his temples; his hangover was quite bad and he had just woken up.
"I've been trying to tell you that for ten minutes Cavallone." Alaude hissed, teeth clenched in barely supressed anger.
"Yeah but my mental capacity for understanding isn't exactly at its peak right now…." Cavallone said, frowning.
"And judging by the way you act it never is." Alaude said curtly, crossing his arms, "Now your son will have to wait a while longer before he meets Kyoya…. I have no idea what's gotten into him; he's always going strictly by-the-book. This must be one good fighter…."
"There there, it'll be o.k.; Hibari's a tough kid he can handle himself." Cavallone said, trying to assuage the slight look of worry on his friends' face.
"I know." Alaude said, blinking slowly as an odd feeling came over him. Almost like…. "Fatigue?" The king wondered, slumping against the already snoring Cavallone's throne.
"What…." He managed to mutter before passing out.
"Damn that guy needs a lot of magic to fall asleep…" A weary Romario muttered before continuing his mission. As he was about to fly away, he thought of what King Alaude was saying and stopped mid-air. "BRILLIANT!" He yelled, flying faster than ever, all signs of weariness gone.
"Fufu~ Well well, what do we have here?" Byakuran said, smirking as his subordinates struggled to restrain a gagged and bound Hibari.
"B-boss can you please- CRAP GRAB THE ROPE- help us? T- OW THAT WAS MY FACE- This guy's really strong….. OUCH MY FREAKING HANDS!" A sweaty and nervous Tazaru said, grappling with the furious skylark.
"Shut up we can do fine on our own! Don't bother Byakuran-sama because you're too weak!" Bluebell said, holding another rope.
"Yes Tazaru. Do us all a favour and shut up." Kikyo said calmly.
"Fufu~ Now now, let's all get along, ne?" Byakuran said with a saccharine smile, tilting his head slightly to the side.
"Sorry Byakuran-sama." All of the subordinates said, creating a rather unflattering cacophony.
"So…. I come here to capture a prince, and I capture a….Prince….. That sounded much cooler in my head!" Byakuran said, raising his hands at Hibari's eye roll.
"Herbivore. Let me go, and you won't have to suffer. For too long at any rate." Hibari said; voice slightly muffled by the gag tied around his mouth.
"Hm….. How about no….. Alright guys, let's take him back to the marshmallow castle!" Byakuran said, smirking all the while and leading the way for his minions, all of which were struggling to keep the angry prince restrained. Unnoticed by neither Byakuran nor his minions, Hibari's cap fell to the ground (which he still questioned the use of,) and rested in the doorway of the hove- cottage. It was a cottage.
"O.k. guys, now that we know someone who Dino could be romantically involved with, we can start our search with a vague idea!" Romario said proudly, having just explained the conversation that was had between King Alaude and King Cavallone. Lampo and Yamamoto looked at each-other dubiously, (well Lampo did at any rate, Yamamoto barely understood the implications of Romario's explanation,) and then both agreed.
"What else do we have to go on?" Lampo said, flying with as little energy as possibly after Romario and Yamamoto, heading towards the cottage.
As the three faeries got to the cottage, they noticed Hibari's cap.
"Hey Romario, Lampo; look at this cap! Isn't it Hibari Kyoya's?" Yamamoto said, holding up said cap.
"It is! And the cottage is nearly destroyed!" Romario said in despair, looking around at the room in shambles.
"Yare yare, I found these…." Lampo said, holding up a bag of marshmallows from which he was eating, and laying on a blanket that had been tossed to the floor.
"It must've been Byakuran! For some reason he has Prince Hibari! C'mon guys, we must go save him!" Romario shouted, turning towards the door, causing Yamamoto to nod in agreement and follow, and Lampo to sigh with exhaustion, but follow nonetheless.
"Fufu~ Here we have the great and renown Hibari Kyoya. How does it feel to be locked up and helpless?" Byakuran taunted Hibari, leering and chuckling at every possible moment. Behind him his box animal was doing the same thing, which was even scarier.
"How the hell does that thing smile? Or laugh? It defies all the laws of dragon anatomy…" Hibari wondered, completely ignoring the slowly quieting Byakuran.
"Hm…. Well I heard you were a tough nut to crack. Guess I'll have to go all out…." Byakuran said, an evil smile gracing his features.
"Uh….. Gamma-nii, can I ask you something?" An uneasy Nosaru asked his fellow guard.
"Sure Nosaru. Shoot." Gamma said with a distinctly apathetic tone.
"…..Why has Byakuran-sama been telling Prince Hibari jokes for the past hour? I thought he was going to mentally torture him…." Nosaru said, tilting his head slightly towards the cell door, where horrible jokes could be heard.
"Don't ask me. These jokes are damn horrible; I actually think they could be classified under mental torture." Gamma said, leaning on his billiard stick.
"I dunno about Prince Hibari, but it's certainly making me want to go insane…." Nosaru said, wincing as another god-awful joke was said.
"Fufu~ Fine you won't laugh at my hilarious jokes, then I'll have to try a different approach." Byakuran said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "Aha, I've got it!" The marshmallow-obsessed male said, smacking his palm with his fist out of excitement.
Hibari simple rolled his eyes, and attempted to sleep again.
"You and that Prince who looks like a chick are an item!" Byakuran said, adopting a triumphant aura when he saw the look of fury on the trapped prince's face.
"What….. Herbivore….." Hibari said, voice dripping with malice.
"Now now, don't be so angry it's so true! Why else would you give up your day to meet the one you're supposed to marry to go and have a fight, hm? Even if they were a good fighter, you wouldn't leave something this important!" The marshmallow addict said, devouring a bag of marshmallows.
"Herbivore, you cannot predict what I would and would not do." Hibari said, eyes flashing dangerously.
"Oh but I can~ Oooh wow this is like one of those 'love at first sight' things, like I watch on the soap opera channels! And now you star-crossed lovers are destined to live apart from one—another, forever! Glorious!" Byakuran said, cackling. "Hm, now that would be no fun….. Oh, I've got it! I will let you love birds be together once more, and I'll even leave you alone for the rest of your days!"
Hibari's eyes lightened a bit at this prospect, though he tried to hide the reaction. Somewhere there was an evil plan waiting, to twist and change the meaning of the words he had uttered, o make them not what they seemed.
"But what…." The prince mused, deciding to stay quiet and let Byakuran tell him himself.
"How's this; I'll keep you locked up in this dungeon until your joints creak in the wind, your hair is as white as newly-fallen snow, your face gaunt and desolate. Your armour and weapons shall be returned, and off on your way you'll go, to save your love, trapped in time and as young and beautiful as ever! But you'll be old and decrepit; we'll see how much he loves you then!" Byakuran threw his head back and let forth a long stream of evil laughs, twisting to leave the cell; leaving Hibari with an illusion of what was to happen.
Hibari's eyes widened, darkened and his body became taut. He would not let this stand, he would never surrender! With new resolve he threw himself against the chains that held him, creating a cacophony of screaming metal.
As Byakuran tortured Hibari in his cell, the three faeries reached the castle gates.
"O.k., now we've got to get in and free Prince Hibari from his chains, and give him his weapons. After that, getting out will be easy." Romario said, peering out cautiously around the pillar they were hiding behind.
"Yare yare, how are we supposed to get by Byakuran's dragon?" Lampo asked, moving his arm in the general area of where the dragon was patrolling.
"We'll just have to do our best to sneak by…." Romario said, twisting his head. "Coast's clear, let's move!" The black-haired faerie said, swiftly running along the chain that led the drawbridge to the castle.
"Ahaha, why don't we just fly to the castle, it'd be a lot faster-" Yamamoto started to say, before Lampo sighed and started to plod after Romario.
"And a lot easier for the dragon to spot us…" The lazy male said, blatantly ignoring Romario's hushed cry of: "Hurry up!"
"Oh, okay." Yamamoto said. A few moments of silence passed, (as silent as Romario's increasingly pissed calls to hurry up could be,) before Yamamoto spoke up again; "Wait, so the dragon is a bad guy?"
Lampo gave him a look, then said; "Well what do you think?" Before rolling his eyes.
"Well… I was waving to it before….. And I gave it some sushi! It doesn't seem that bad…" The clueless idiot said, before Lampo and Romario stopped, and gave Yamamoto identical 'what the fuck?!' stares.
"Yamamoto….. Please tell me you're joking…" Romario said, failing to see the shadow of the dragon flying nearer.
"Uh….nope?" Yamamoto said, laughing uneasily, scratching his head.
"Yare yare….. Guys…" Lampo said, unnoticed by the other two; Romario reprimanding and Yamamoto laughing.
"Guys-" Lampo tried to speak again, before the dragon landed directly behind Romario.
Romario turned slowly, eyes wide. "Oh." A brief moment of tension-punctuated silence passed, before Romario screamed, "FLY!"
Lampo and Yamamoto were only too happy to comply, speeding away as if the hounds of hell had been set loose behind them.
"Ahaha, I guess the dragon is that bad after all…." Yamamoto said, his words interrupted with heavy breaths.
"Ya think?" Lampo said, turning a sharp corner as the dragon nearly caught up.
"It's ok guys, I got this!" Romario said, before turning and casting a spell at the dragon.
"Yeah, I'm so sure I-" Lampo was cut off as he flew face-first into the stone statue of the dragon.
"Oooooh….." Yamamoto said, staring at Lampo's groaning form, curled up into a ball on the ground.
"C'mon Lampo, get up, we need to find Prince Hibari!" Romario said, pulling the other protesting faerie to his feet.
"Yare yare….. Is it possible for one's face to break?" Lampo muttered, dragging his feet and touching his face gingerly behind Romario and Yamamoto.
Yamamoto crept around a corner, peering this way and that for anyone, or anything. "All clear!" He called, earning himself a whap from Romario.
"Yamamoto! Think before you speak, anyone could hear us!" Romario said in an anxious whisper.
"Haha, I forgot…" Yamamoto said, scratching his head.
"Who's there." Said an unknown voice, the tone making it sound more like a command than a question.
"Yare yare, just us faeries." Lampo said, holding his hands up in surrender once he saw Prince Hibari in the cell.
"Get me out. Now." Hibari said, aiming a nod at the keys hanging on the wall. (The guard had just run off for a quick bathroom break.)
"Of course!" Romario said, grabbing the key ring. " Yamamoto and Lampo have your weapons and Scuderia's ready to go. We made some stops on our way here."
"Good work Herbivore." Hibari said, eyeing the keys. His gaze narrowed as Romario tried the fifth key, with no luck.
"Hang on a second…" Romario said, brow furrowed with concentration. After a few minutes Lampo, fearing the steadily-darkening Prince's aura, quietly flew between the bars and twisted the tumblers from the other side.
"Oh hey you got it Romario!" said the ever-ignorant Yamamoto, smiling with his fellow faerie as the door opened.
"Good, now the same key should work on the prince's shackles…." Romario said, stopping with surprise at the sight of a free Hibari.
"Yare yare you guys sure can be idiots sometimes….. Making me work so much…." Lampo muttered, sitting on the floor.
"Haha, sorry Lampo!" Yamamoto said as they left the cell, Hibari leading at a brisk pace.
"Yare yare I'll forgive you if you give me a piggy-back ride." Lampo said, smirking slightly as Yamamoto obliged.
"Lampo, flying takes no energy; we just float through the air, so you don't even need a piggy-back ride!" Romario scolded, none of the three noticing the bloodbath in front of them. (Hibari had found the guards.)
"Yare yare whatever, I just want to sleep…" Said the lazy faerie, nodding off while Yamamoto flew after Hibari. Everyone ignored the giant pile of bodies that had mysteriously amassed.
"Fufu~" Byakuran laughed as he watched Hibari defeat all of his guards and escape the castle, followed by three points of light. "I knew I should've killed those pesky faeries when I had the chance…. Oh well, I'll just have to make sure Prince Hibari never makes it to the castle on my own!"
With a wave of his hand, Byakuran created a whole forest of marshmallows surrounding Cavallone castle.
"Fufu~ Try and get through that!" Byakuran said, laughing along with his dragon.
The faeries and Hibari stopped, looking upon the seemingly endless field of marshmallows.
"How will we get through that?" Yamamoto wondered, after witnessing Hibari's futile attempts to pierce the giant sugary treats.
"…. I've got an idea." Romario said, with a serious look. He turned to Yamamoto, and grabbed Lampo, twisting his feebly resisting form towards the marshmallows.
"Yare yare wha-" Lampo's eyes both opened in wonder, jaw hanging with disbelief at the sight before him.
"You know what to do." Romario said, and the three followed Lampo, who was stuffing his face and creating a path.
An hour had passed, and while they were nearly at the castle Hibari felt that he would be sick if he saw one more marshmallow. As he peered at the castle, and the tower where Dino was held, (if the faeries were telling the truth,) he wondered, "Why would I want to save that herbivore? It can't be… affection. No, it must be because he's a good fighter. But if he was a good enough fighter he wouldn't have fallen victim to a curse…" Hibari silenced his thoughts and glared pointedly at the back of Yamamoto's head, filling his head with thoughts of other things….. Like how that herbivore's golden hair looked when it blew in the wind, and that smile, the way he- "Shit." He thought, eye twitching slightly. He was saved from his herbivorous thoughts when they reached the edge of the marshmallow forest, and Romario and Yamamoto cheered.
"Yare yare no fair why'd they disappear I want more…" Lampo said, lying down and staring glumly at the marshmallow-free land.
"Huh? Why'd they disappear?" Yamamoto started to say, when the flapping of wings reached his ears.
"The marshmallow demon." Hibari said, pulling out his tonfas and grinning in anticipation for a rematch.
"Fufu~ I guess I underestimated you guys….. No matter, I won't be able to make that mistake anymore!" Byakuran said, growing and disappearing into a cloud of marshmallows as he finished speaking.
Hibari's eyes narrowed and he gripped his tonfas more securely, positioning himself in a defensive position.
"Wait! Before you fight Prince Hibari…." Romario started to say, before he was knocked over by a rapidly-retreating Lampo.
"EVERY FAERIE FOR HIMSELF!" Lampo screamed, flying like he never had before.
"LAMPO! Ugh…." Romario yelled, before turning his attention, once again, to Hibari. "Ok so I wanted to-" Romario was cut off by the impatient booming voice of Byakuran:
"Can we hurry this up? Because my favourite show, Marshmallows: A History, is coming on soon and it's an hour-long special."
"With pleasure Herbivore." Hibari said, before lunging at the dragon.
"Wait….. Oh what the hell he'll defeat Byakuran easily…" Romario said, shrugging and ducking as a boulder flew by him, barely missing his wing.
"Haha, oh wow that was fast!" Yamamoto said, coming out from his hiding place with Lampo.
"Hm?" Romario said, turning to see Hibari calmly sheathing his tonfas, Byakuran nowhere to be seen.
"Yare yare, where'd Byakuran go?" Lampo asked, creeping warily forward. Hibari stepped aside and pointed to a small white object on the ground.
"Oh that isn't…" Romario mumbled, then started to laugh as he realized it was, indeed, a marshmallow.
"Damn you you assholes! Now I- Hey wait….. I'M DELICIOUS!" Byakuran said, happily eating himself.
"Hn. Awaken all those sleeping herbivores. I'll take care of that clumsy herbivore." Hibari said, entering the castle gates at a fast clip.
"Alright!" The three faeries said….. Or at least Yamamoto and Romario. Those two flew off to do as Hibari said, while Lampo slumped to the ground and mumbled about food and sleep.
As Romario and Yamamoto sprinkled faerie dust over the sleeping people, Hibari approached Dino's room. When he got there, he simply broke the doors down, feeling no interest in opening them properly. He was a Hibari, he could do whatever he pleased!
"Hn. There sh- he is…." Hibari said to himself crossing the floor to stand by Dino's bedside. "….." Hibari simply stared at Dino, until he realised what he was doing and shook himself, feeling like some kind of perverted stalker. "Better get this over with…." The prince thought, then bent down and gave the sleeping beauty a kiss. A quick one. Which involved no tongue. None at all. Why do you ask? *cough*
"Hm…." Dino muttered as sh- he stirred. "What…. Where am I?" Sh- He said, looking around in confusion. The confused prince caught sight of Hibari sanding there, and sat up in bed, stammering nonsense and blushing like crazy.
"Herbivore." Hibari said, effectively shutting Dino up. "Let's go." He said, holding out his hand.
"Uh… O-ok…" The prince said, accepting the gesture.
"Like I was saying Alaude….. Huh? Wait what the hell…." Cavallone said, sitting up in his chair and wiping drool off his face, staring at his awakening subjects and guests.
"Cavallone. It seems the faeries put us all to sleep when Dino fell prey to the curse, but my son came and saved him, so consequently the faeries woke us up." Alaude said, Romario nodding in confirmation every now and then.
"Yeah, uh ok then…." The tired Cavallone said stretching and blinking. His eyes nearly popped out of his head a second later, when he saw the ones coming down the stairs.
"Play the fucking trumpets or they'll be shoved where the sun don't shine!" Cavallone hissed quietly to the terrified royal trumpeters, who were quick to oblige.
As one, the crowd looked to the staircase and gasped with wonder at the sight.
The famously aloof Prince Hibari came down the steps looking as regal as ever, holding on to the hand of a beautiful woman who was dressed in a stunning pink gown. The woman seemed to be having trouble with her balance but the prince held her hand in a firm grip, ensuring that she wouldn't tumble down the staircase.
When the trumpets began to play, the crowd slowly realized who was coming down the staircase, and everyone felt shame and embarrassment when they realized that the 'woman' was their very own Prince Dino. However, these feelings were soon forgotten as the crowd separated so that there was a large place on the dance floor, their cheering and celebrating nearly drowning out the trumpet calls.
"OH YEAH OUR PRINCESS- PRINCE IS SEEEXY!" The drunks cheered, while the stoners slowly admired the sparkles on Dino's dress.
"Uh…." Dino said, hyperventilating as sh- he realized that sh- he was still wearing the damned dress. "K-Kyoya…." Dino muttered, (for Hibari had explained everything on their way down,) and Hibari looked over from killing the cheering drunks with his intense glare.
"Yes herbivore?" Hibari said, walking out to the middle of the floor with grace, dragging along a tripping Dino.
"Uh can I go change first…. I am wearing a dress after all….." Dino said, pulling at the fabric.
"No." Hibari said, placing his hands on Dino's waist.
"But Kyoya, why not?" Dino whined quietly, glancing around at he-his parents' beaming faces, (the glint of a video camera could still be seen in the rapidly-darkening room.) and resting her- his hands on Hibari's shoulders.
"Because I said so herbivore. Shut up and dance." Hibari said, sweeping Dino into the fast waltz the band had begun to play.
"Fine…." Dino said, trying in vain to not trip over he- his own feet.
"Well they look happy!" Yamamoto commented, peering down from the balcony where he, Romario, and Lampo were resting.
"Yeah, we did it…" Romario said, watching the dancing couple with pride and a hint of sadness.
"Yare yare, oh dear it looks like Hibari decided to take that rematch… And only after one song too. Oh well." Lampo said, leaning on the railing heavily.
"WHAT?!" Romario yelled, leaning over the railing and staring in shock at the fight taking place below.
"Haha, well it looks like Mukuro's got an illusion of one of us again…. Well at least Dino will be able to fight! And it looks like they're dancing, so it all works out!" Yamamoto said brightly, gesturing to the couple.
"Yeah…." Romario said, smiling slightly as he watched.
A moment of content silence passed, punctured only by the orchestra and the sound of fighting coming from below. Then of course Lampo had to ruin it.
"….They're going to have one HELL of a honeymoon." Lampo said, smirking and raising his eyebrows at Romario and Yamamoto suggestively.
"LAMPO!" Romario yelled, while Yamamoto laughed. The couple danced on, happy in their own world, and the camera rose peacefully, signalling the end of the story.
THE END
"Kyoya?" Dino said, dodging one of his husband-to-be's blows.
"Yes?" Hibari said, turning to avoid being cut.
"I love you!" The blonde said, smiling happily.
"Don't get distracted herbivore." Hibari said, successfully pinning Dino and taking he- his whip.
"Wha- Aw Kyoya that's cheating!" Dino said, and began to say something else, before Hibari initiated a kiss.
All was w-
"NO ALAUDE I CAN'T JUST SIT HERE AND WATCH ME SON'S LIP VIRIGNITY GET STOLEN IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE!" Cavallone screamed, fighting against Alaude, trying to get to Hibari and Dino. (Who were now fully making out.)
"Shut it." Alaude said, punching the annoying King in the face.
*Ahem* And all was well.
THE (ACTUAL) END
*Bronco is basically like Rose was in the movie, an alibi name so no-one would know he's actually Prince Dino
** I feel like even if they were related they'd call each-other formally….. It's my story, my rules!
*** Lampo, Romario, and Yamamoto. Not Dino's 'birth' family….. Duh…
****Yes, I am aware that this is Dino's horse. I felt like incorporating him into the story and Aurora didn't have a horse in Sleeping Beauty…..
Hey guys! *whew* worked on this for so loooong….. For like, 3 months… I'm too lazy. Anyways, It's finally finished! YESSSS! HALLELUJAH! I started rushing in the end, so sorry that it started to go downhill. However, I hope this knocked a few laughs into your day, feel free to insult me if you find grammatical errors, (Yes, faeries is SUPPOSED TO BE SPELLED THAT WAY,) and feel no need to review! Thanks for reading until the end! (If any of you just skipped down here, I will find you, and I will kill you. *cough* Yeah right *cough*)
THANKS!