Trust me with your heart John, I'll take good care of it.
Chapter 1
John's POV:
2am. New record. Sometimes I massively regret agreeing to live with Sherlock Holmes. When he said he liked to play his violin when he was thinking, I didn't think that would mean at 2am in the morning.
After 45 minutes of attempting to get back to sleep but failing miserably I decided I would get up and make some coffee. I stumbled out of bed and reached for my dressing gown only to discover it wasn't on its hook on my bedroom door. Sherlock seriously? He is always borrowing my clothes without consent, sometimes it drives me mad.
I shiver my way through to the living room on route to the kitchen, there standing looking out of the window playing his violin was Sherlock, he was playing a rather solemn piece, probably one he has composed himself I thought.
"Good morning Sherlock" I said attempting to hide the irritation of being woken up at 2 in the morning from my voice.
No response.
"Sherlock? Hello?" I said again sounding a bit more irritated than I meant to this time. He still didn't make any response, he slowly turned to face me and this is when I noticed something was wrong. The expression on Sherlock face was as sad and solemn as his music and his eyes were all puffed up and red as if he had been crying. Wait he had been crying, I could just about see the shiny trails falling down his cheeks where tears had previously fallen. This wasn't like Sherlock, he hardly ever cries, this was starting to worry me.
"Sherlock, are you okay?" I asked cautiously, seeing him obviously in some great emotional pain hurt me too, I felt like I wanted to cry aswell, I could tell that Sherlock was trying to stand strong. He hates crying in front of people, he believes shows of emotion are a weakness. We just stood there staring at each other for a while.
Then something completely unexpected happened. Sherlock took a slow small wobbly step towards me, stood there wobbling for a moment or two, then just threw himself at me, knocking me backwards into my armchair, he landed on me and immediately wrapped his arms round my neck and started sobbing. I had no idea what to do, this situation was completely knew, all I could think to do was cuddle him as he sobbed into my chest making my pyjama top soaked.
"shush, its okay Sherlock. What's wrong?" I asked soothingly
"Oh John" Sherlock sniffed " I can't keep this up any longer" I looked into his eyes, I didn't really understand what he meant.
"Can't keep what up?" I ask slowly. Keeping eye contact with Sherlock as if his eyes would give me the answers I seeked. Just then Sherlock lifted himself off of me and paced up and down the room.
"Its this not gay image John, isn't it obvious? even Anderson with his single brain cell would be able to tell John, I can't believe that you haven't noticed yet. It is the most obvious observation even a child would know instantly" Sherlock said between sobs, he seemed to be getting quite agitated now.
"Sherlock. I think you need to calm down okay? Whatever this s we can talk about it alright?" I say starting to sound slightly desperate myself.
"I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU JOHN HAMISH WATSON!" Sherlock shouted and immediately fell into a sobbing mess in his armchair.
I didn't know what to do I just stared back at him with my mouth wide open. Sherlock Holmes loves m...me? What do I do? How can I admit that I have loved him from that first time I saw him and was delighted when he asked if we could flat share. How could I tell him that all my dates were just an act to hide my true feelings for Sherlock. How I never liked any of those women, only him. How can I admit that I am madly in love with Sherlock Holmes. I mean his hair, those gorgeous dark curly locks, so soft to the touch and how they always smell of baby shampoo, his cheekbones, so strong and defining and his eyes, so innocent yet hold the age and wisdom of something had lived double the human lifespan. Sherlock Holmes was the most gorgeous man I had ever met.
My thought were interrupted by the sound of Sherlock slumping down on the sofa, lying facing the wall like he always does when he is upset. I can still hear him gently sobbing. I walk over and sit on the floor by the sofa. I have to tell him, there is no point being in pain if I love him back.
"Sherlock. Listen" I start but as usual I am interrupted by Sherlock, he rolled over to look at me.
"I'm sorry John, I understand if I have offended you or made you feel uncomfortable by expressing my feelings, there was a reason why I had kept them hidden from the day I met you but I just couldn't keep it in anymore, it was killing me. I completely understand if you want to move out or you want me to move out, I can go stay with mother and father or Mycroft for a while its really no problem. I'm sorry, please forgive me, I need you as my friend. I don't have friends, only you. I'm sorry" Sherlock looks sad as he starts to get up off the sofa. Quick John do something you idiot!
"Sherlock wait" deep breath, here goes.
"You see the thing is, William Sherlock Scott Holmes, I am madly in love with you, all those dates were just a cover up to hide my feelings as I thought you were 100% straight and married to your work. I have wished to hear you say those words for so long and it still seems surreal that you actually have said them" I breathed deeply, I did it, I confessed my love for Sherlock Holmes.
I stand there looking at the floor, not daring to look up and see Sherlock's reaction. I stood there for what was only a matter of minutes but felt like hours until I saw Sherlock's feet toe to toe with mine. I looked up and Sherlock was looking at me with the biggest grin I have ever seen from him, he had little tears in the corners of his eyes, this only made them more gorgeous. He pulled my face towards his, I felt like my heart was in my stomach, I was so nervous. I was moments away from my first kiss with the man I had loved from the first day I had met him. Sherlock leaned forward and pressed his soft lips against mine, so warm and meaningful. I smiled. This was perfect, he was perfect.
Sherlock released the hug and looked at him happily.
"John Watson, will you be my boyfriend?" he asked hopefully.
"Oh god yes" I replied pulling him into another more passionate kiss