"No, Dean. I wouldn't. Same circumstances… I wouldn't…"
Sam left, leaving Dean alone with his thoughts. How could he say that?
Dean stared after his baby brother, thoughts buzzing a million miles a minute in his head. He knew that he was supposed to be the protector- the big brother- but he had always thought that Sam still felt protective of him, too. Dean always just assumed that they both felt the same way, but apparently he was wrong.
He pressed the palm of his hands against his eyes which were threatening to tear up. He would not cry. He was Dean-freaking-Winchester, he doesn't break that easily.
Of course it makes sense. Dean was born to give, Sam was born to take. It had always been that way, since the day of the fire- or maybe even before then.
Yet more recently, Dean had begun to feel like the feeling was mutual. He and his brother were inseparable, almost to an unhealthy degree. He knew that he could not go on without Sammy, but he also knew it was unfair to expect the same from him.
He should have realized this after purgatory. He was always meant to be alone, after all. Everyone just kept leaving him. Sam left him to rot in Purgatory and found a new, happy life with Amelia. Dean managed to screw that up for him, too. No wonder Sam would have left him to die.
Even Cas left him to stay in Purgatory, reminding Dean once again that he needed people more than they needed him. And then Dean kicked him out of the bunker like the asshole he was.
And then there was Kevin...
The truth was, Sam was right to say what he did. If roles were reversed, Sam should've left Dean to die. He, and everyone else, would've been better off that way.
But Dean would not apologize for saving Sam. Sam deserved to live, and Dean would make sure that he would. He would kill Gadreel, Metetron, and Abbadon so that Sam was safe from them.
And then he'd go.
It was better that way.