Raito was sitting on his patio drinking liquor. He was reading a very interesting book. It was called Death author was L! So he went to the library to see if there were any other books by him. He walked swiftly to the public library and asked the librarian about L. She said, "What L are you talking about?"
Raito said, as he flipped his brown hair lazily, "The one that wrote this book." And he held up the book. She gasped and jumped up and down.
"You are so lucky!" She said. "He's in town today! DOING A BOOK SIGNING! He'll be here at two." It was only twelve, so Raito had to kill some time. He called up his buddy Ryuk to see if he wanted to go get lunch. They decided to go to Ryuk's favorite restaurant, BOSTON PIZZA!
They got a table for two when they noticed their two friends Near and Mello. They called their friends over! Raito said, "LOOK AT THIS COOL BOOK I FOUND! And the AUTHOR is doing a signing at TWO! Do you wanna come with us?"
Ryuk nodded excitedly as he sipped his iced tea delicately. Suddenly it was two o' clock, and the boys were at the signing waiting in line.
Now it was their turn! L looked up at them. He said, "Hello there. Uhm. What is your name?" Raito said, "Raito!" Um. And then he pulled out a SHOTGUN. Ryuk puled out a machette, and Mello and Near pulled out ninja stars.
"THIS BOOK IS A DISGRACE!" Yelled all of them as they chopped L to pieces. But L wasn't dead yet. He got up and in his severed hand held a pen. He wrote in the back of one of his novels the names of all the boys. And then slammed the book shut. Then all of the guys laughed as they chopped up the book too. Then the boys fell to the floor like confetti and they cried. "WHY DID I HAVE TO READ THAT BOOK!!?"
I have never read Death Note in my life.
The end.