It was the wedding of Mary and Francis. Catherine stood in the hall, saying goodbye and wishing a lot of happiness to her son and his new wife. Back at the ceremony the queen noticed the way Henry was staring at her. His look was different. It was unknown to her. Her husband drank a lot, but she did her best not to concentrate on Henry's reaction but on her own son and Mary.

And then Catherine was finally in her bedroom. She thought about her past and future. Many thoughts went through her mind. She looked into the window; seeing the darkness and only a few lights still burning outside. Everything seemed quiet.

She thought of how Francis had grown up. How the time had passed. She thought of her first days at the castle and her wedding night. She thought about Henry, how innocent and deep her love for him was. But it was a delusion. Richard? She never really was in love with Richard. He was protecting and loving her and that was what she searched for.

Her husband was the one who brought her into the hands of another man. Richard was protecting her till his death. She remembered how angry, disappointed and sad Henry was that day.

Sad? Was he really sad? Or just mad because someone took something that belonged to him. That was what she asked herself many times when it had something to do with Henry. She was unsure and never really knew what he felt or what he was going to do next. So many times he had betrayed her. So many times she had cried. Yes, she cried… Queen of France, de Medici woman, cried.

He was even willing to kill her without any regrets. Her, his wife through all this years, the mother of 8 of his children… Since that day and since her liberation he hadn't talked to her. He just looked at her in a strange way. And she tried not to look away but she did it. It wasn't the repentance that she felt, no. Catherine was not pretending to feel sorry about anything simply because he'd betrayed her so many times. So why should she feel sorry when it doesn't even heart him?..

But there she was. She was still the Queen of France, the wife of the King and the mother of the future King. He had not killed her. He had the right to do it but he hadn't. He said it was because of Francis, but what King would ever let his son change something once a decision had been made? And so Catherine thought that maybe – just maybe - there was still a spark of love that they both felt years ago.

The only thing she wanted to do now was to sleep. Passing next to the mirror she glanced at her long red dress, perfectly fitting the pale skin. She took off her crown and let the hair down. When she was about to take her dress off, Catherine looked at the mirror again, only to see Henry standing there, starring at her.

"What are you doing here? I thought you are busy… with Kenna or someone else."

He took a step forward, approaching her. Catherine could smell he'd been drinking a lot, she could see it in his eyes. The king said nothing. He just just kept looking at his wife. The thing he loved the most in her was her hair. Her long, wavy hair. It had the color of sun, gold… and the smell of it… it was unique. He had been searching for this smell in every woman, but he never found it. Her skin was still perfect, the pale color of her skin… she was born to be a Queen, and he knew that. And her eyes, the eyes of a real de Medici, these eyes drove him crazy. Catherine was the reason of his unhappy life. It was her who was the reason of his weakness despite his power and position. Henry stared at his wife with a passionate gaze, and then he suddenly snapped.

"Why I am here? What kind of a question is that? Am I not allowed to visit you in your chambers?" The way he talked frightened Catherine. She felt that he was nervous and aggressive. It was alcohol what made him react like that.

"No, but …"

"But what?" he turned to her and stared at her for a few moments, starting from feet and finally reaching her eyes. "I should have listened to all the people then. I should have killed you years ago or sent you back to Italy when I had a chance. I shouldn't have let your power boost. I should not have trusted you. What have I done? I've loved you – I've never really cared how far we would go, fast or slow. I ignored everything they've said just because I believed you, I believed in us. They told me you would cause me pain and yes, that's what you've done to me."

"Henry, please! I am not going to continue this conversation. You are not able to communicate, you've drunk too much tonight…" She turned her back on him and was about to leave when he grabbed her hand and pulled her closer to him. Angry and aggressive.

"We are not done and this is going to take a lot of time."

She felt fear growing inside her; suddenly Catherine could not recognize her husband. She suddenly realized he would not go so easily and let it all just be. He was determined to go through with this show.

"Henry, you are hurting me! Let me go!"

"Tell me, what did he have that I didn't? What did Richard have that made you make him your lover then?"

"What are talking about? You are losing your mind and your dignity. Please go, I am really tired and not able to talk about the past right now."

He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her body tighter against him. She felt the pain in her hands and her spine.

"When did all of this start? When have you let him make love to you the first time? Where? Oh, was it here?"

He became more and more aggressive.

"Henry, what's going on with you? Go now, you do not realize what you're doing and saying. You've drunk too much."

"Just answer the question!"

"What are you expecting me to do? What should I say to you? That I'm sorry? Well. I'm not! I will not feel sorry. Are you thinking about me when you're with Diane or Kenna or someone else? It was the despair and anger that I felt at that time. Nothing else! You have neglected me and he was always there. He held my hand, comforted me, respect me… and you? What have you done for me? Except giving me this crown…"

He seemed not to hear her words. The fear she felt was now stronger. She wanted to scream and cry but she was the Queen, so she would not.

"Was he better than me? Tell me! Was he better?"

"You're crazy!"

"And you… you're not a Queen, you're a... I will show you how much better I am now. I'm going to refresh your memory."

Henry pushed his wife against the wall, his eyes burning her body; she felt the pain his hands caused hers, her waist, her neck… He forcefully opened the buttons of her dress and started kissing her neck and touching her passionately while she desperately fought against it. It was unthinkable for Catherine to be in this situation, she always knew how to control everything but here and now she was incapable of doing anything to stop her husband. She wanted to find the right words that would stop her husband but she couldn't. She knew that the only one who would have helped her was their son Francis, but he was not here. And there was no one else in this castle who'd have the courage to defend her from the King.

"Henry, stop it! You're drunk and tomorrow you will regret it! For your best, just stop this, let's talk!" her voice trembled

He stopped for a moment, looking into her eyes with anger and desire

"Talk? Your words aren't worth anything! Did you talk to others before taking them in your bed? DID YOU?"

Henry pushed her even harder. He kept on kissing her neck and cheeks, trying to force her to kiss him back. And then he whispered in her ear, "You like this? Don't tell me you haven't missed me… my Queen!"

As the fear grew in Catherine she tried fighting more and more to free herself from his grip, but then he said, "The more you fight, the more it will hurt Catherine."

His movements became more aggressive and painful to her.

He threw her onto the bed as if nothing could stop him from doing what he desired. Catherine struggled like a wounded lioness, but she wasn't that strong. She couldn't fight back. She felt so fragile and helpless at this moment, like never before.

When she was no longer able to defend herself from him, her hands gripped the bed linen as she focused on just one thing: not to scream and beg. Her husband the king took her against her will that night. He made her feel ashamed and worthless… There was a tear in her eye. As Henry continued, the tear fell down the cheek. It was not the first but it wouldn't be the last tear caused by Henry, her husband, the King either…

A big "THANK YOU" to Maria Purt for her help and support with the text!