The Dragonborn made her home in Haafingar; it was fit to be a mead hall in Soverngaurd. It had nearly 70 beds, huge fire pits to supply food and heat to the entire compound. Even as the great Dragonborn, who saved all of Tameriel, she had made many enemies; so she kept her armory full of enough weapons to supply an army, and an army she had, or at least to the denizens of Skyrim she did. She refused to keep mercenaries as guards because all that stood between her and a blade at her throat was a higher payday from somebody else. All to keep her family safe, she always had regrets about being found out as the Dragonborn, but they were all selfish wishes. If the Grey beards had never found her out, how many would have had to die? More than any war ever recorded surely, a war with dragons, hellfire raining from the sky onto children; no one would be saved. Her family or Tameriel, that was the constant question, Vilkas would never forgive her. He could understand leaving for months on end to clear a nest of vampires, but abandoning Tamriel to love her children, it was like she had adopted all of Tamriel, with one shout from the Grey Beards, it all changed.
Vilkas and I tromped through the forested region in Falkreath, or at least he tromped. I was taking him out to hunt today, he's hunted before but he's never been light footed a day in his life. Its been hours, and at this point I don't care if we catch anything. He and I are laughing and grinning from ear to ear. But then the silence takes over, he stated quietly," Aduial, please look at me, I've heard rumors that you run with the thieves and murderers, I need the truth." Here we go again, I hate this, I hate lying to him,
"I've never hurt anyone I haven't had to Vilkas. I wouldn't, you know me." My voice came out as this pleading tone, just what I wanted to try and avoid, perfect.
"Youre sure," he whispered, his voice low, "You're absolutely sure, that you have never killed anyone for the Dark Brotherhood, or stolen for the Thieves' guild? The guards, they whisper, so do the townspeople. Aduial, I can't live like this. I love you, more than anything or one in the world, but you can't lie to me like this. We can't both pretend that we know nothing; it feels like I barely connect with you anymore. "
I exhale, slowly to try and get a hold of myself, "And could you live with the truth? Would you leave me? I did what I had to when we had nothing to make a safe place for the future." That sounded a bit more condescending than I would have liked, but it got the point across.
"You sold yourself." He was angry, furious even. I wonder if he knows I am in charge of both organizations, he couldn't know, he would have left if he knew.
I looked down, I could not bare to look at him. The truth could come out now or later, the results would be the same if not worst if I waited. "Yes, I sold myself; our guards are courtesy of the Dark Brotherhood, not just our blood brothers and sisters. The large gem in our bedroom, is the right eye of the Falmer, its from the biggest job I've ever done for the Thieves' Guild, the left eye is in the Thieves' headquarters." Okay, it wasn't the biggest job, but he couldn't know what the Skeleton Key was, or that it existed, "Niruin, the Bosmer, he was my lover, before you. My first child, the one I had when we first met, Amrûn-" he cut me off.
"Say no more. I guessed as much." His disappointment hurt. His blank stare hurt more. I looked at the ground; I had no great lie or reason for it all. The silence consumed us, he started walking so I followed, and this could very well be the end of the only relationship that ever meant anything to me. I had to try and save this. I had to try and save him I had already destroyed all that I loved before Skyrim.