What is Christmas Anyway?

Summary: Have a Christmas in July treat, as we go back to Zack's first Christmas with the Rugrats, and they learn about the first Christmas, Rugrats style.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original Rugrats characters, they're the property of their original creaters. Also, Zack and his aunty Celeste, have been with the gang since Rugrats and the Gray Plague, and Peter is an OC created by TCKing12.

"Howdy kids, I'm Mr. Christmas! You can say lights on, lights off, or a song title from my song book, and I will gladly play it for you!" Said a robotic voice. We fade back to Tommy's living room, where the Christmas tree is set up, and the lights are blinking on and off to the tune of Sleigh Ride. Near the Christmas tree, sat a guy who looked kind of like Santa Clause, attached to this little control box where the Christmas tree was plugged in, and Tommy, Kimi, Phil, Lil, Chuckie, and Zack were all dancing around the Christmas tree.

"This is a really neat toy!" Said Tommy excitedly.

"Thank you! It's called Mr. Christmas, and my Aunty got it for me as an early Christmas present!" Replied Zack.

"I wanna try!" Said Lil.

"Go ahead!" Said Zack.

"Mister Christmas, play Jingle Bells." Said Lil.

"Jingle Bells, coming right up!" Said Mister Christmas, followed by the tune of Jingle Bells playing, as the lights on the Christmas tree blinked on and off to the music.

Just then, Angelica walked up to the babies, unplugged the control box from the tree, causing the music to stop, and the lights on the tree to shut off, and threw Mister Christmas across Tommy's living room.

"Hey! What did you do that for? That was my favoritest Christmas toy!" Shouted Zack.

"You dumb babies are making too much noise, and I can't hear my special, A Very Cynthia Christmas. And I'm sorry, but you're not gonna ruin it for me this year." Snapped Angelica.

"And what happened last year?" Kimi asked.

"Do I dare ask?" Zack added.

"I don't know, something about the meany of Chanukka or something. Well if anything, it's the last day I can catch A Very Cynthia Christmas before we go up to that dumb old cabin tomorrow and I don't wanna miss it, so you dumb babies just be quiet and leave me alone." Snapped Angelica, as she headed back towards the TV, where Cynthia's picture was on it.

"And now, it's time for, A Very Cynthia Christmas." Said an announcer's voice on the TV.

"Hmmm, I don't remember some meany of Chanukka." Said Zack.

"That's cuz our first Chanukka and Thanksgiving were together! It was really neat, cuz I had never celebrated either holiday before, mommy and I didn't celebrate those in Paris." Said Kimi with a smile.

It was true. Zack and Kimi's first Thanksgiving with the other rugrats was also the first day of Chanukka, a very interesting holiday indeed, complete with turkey, potato pancakes, and the lighting of the first candle on the manora, as Thanksgiving and the first day of Chanukka fell on the same day that year. Betty was glad her turkey franks cooked that year without a fire starting like what had happened the year before, and while grandpa Boris interrupted Stu and Drew's football game watching to light that first candle on the manora, and say the blessing that's said on the first day of Chanukka, they were glad their sattlelight dishes weren't knocked over again that year like the previous Thanksgiving, so they could go right back to their silly old football game after the Chanukka ceremony was over. There was also the receiving of Tommy's first Chanukka present, a Reptar bar candy maker machine, designed by his father, so naturally, it failed, only creating gooey chocolate, which Angelica managed to cover herself and her cousin's living room in, when she took it from the babies. Nonetheless, it was an interesting collision of holidays in both, Zack and Kimi's eyes for their first holidays of those holidays, and something that wouldn't happen again for another seventy-six bazillion years, according to Tommy's grandpa Boris.

Just then, Taffy walked into the room. She was over babysitting the rugrats while all of their parents and Zack's aunt were out getting some last minute things before they headed up to the cabin the next day.

"Did I hear you being mean to the minis again Angelica?" Taffy asked.

"Uh… no. We were just, playing!" Angelica lied.

"Now Angelica, I heard a loud crash from the other room. Is this what you threw?" Taffy asked, picking up Mister Christmas off of the floor from where Angelica threw it.

"Tell me the truth Angelica." Snapped Taffy.

Angelica nodded her head.

"You'd better not wreck anymore of the minis toys, or you can forget about your Cynthia special. I'll be off in the garage practicing with my band one last time before tonight's Christmas pajjent at Zack and Susie's church while your parents are out shopping getting ready for your annual Christmas trip up to the cabin in the mountains tomorrow. So you guys had better behave, and no more being mean to the minis Angelica, is that clear?" Demanded Taffy.

"Oh yes Taffy, I'll be good." Angelica lied in her sweet voice she always uses with the grown ups. Taffy picked up her guitar and headed out to the garage where she met up with her band for practice.

"Come on guys, let's go play outside." Said Tommy, as he and the others headed to his backyard.

"And don't you dumb babies even think of playing in my new Cynthia playhouse out there, it's an early Christmas present from my daddy!" Yelled Angelica from the living room, as she heard the others go outside.

"Don't worry Angelica, we won't touch it." Yelled Zack.

"Tommy, did Taffy say we were going up to that cabin again for Christmas?" Chuckie asked.

"Yeah Chuckie." Said Tommy.

"I just hope my daddy doesn't dress up as Santa Clause and come down the chimney again this year. That was scary last year." Said Chuckie shakeley.

"All I remember about last Christmas was something about a Reptar space helmet." Said Phil.

"And a box of crayons." Added Lil.

"Well last Christmas, I was in Paris, and I got to ride on a Reptar float in the annual Reptar Land Christmas parade!" Said Kimi excitedly.

"Well last Christmas, I did something even more important than see my daddy come down a chimney or ride in a parade." Said Zack.

"What was that?" Tommy asked.

"I played the baby Jesus!" Said Zack.

"The baby Jesus?" Asked Chuckie.

"I've met a lot of babies at the park, but never anyone named Jesus." Said Tommy.

"Oh this baby is more special than anybody you'll meet in the park. He's the reason we celebrate Christmas in the first place!" Explained Zack.

"Did Jesus grow up to be Santa Clause?" Lil asked.

"No, but you'll learn all about that tonight when we attend my Christmas pajjent, where I'll be playing a sheep." Zack replied, showing them his sheep costume.

"Wow, that's a really neat costume!" Said Kimi.

"Thanks Kimi. I'm really excited to be in the pajjent again this year. And this year, Taffy is playing the music and Susie will be in it too!" Said Zack with excitement.

"Sounds boring." Said Chuckie.

"Awe come on Chuckie, I think it sounds like fun!" Said Tommy.

"Hey, why don't we have our own pajjent and learn about the firstest Christmas." Said Zack.

"That's a great idea!" Said Kimi.

"Let's do it!" Said Tommy.

Just then, Susie arrived in Tommy's backyard along with Dil. Susie was dressed as an angel.

"Hi guys." Said Susie.

"Hey Susie, wanna be in our Christmas pajjent?" Tommy asked.

"Yeah Zack is gonna teach us all about the firstest Christmas!" Said Kimi.

"I'd love to! After all, I need to practicise for the real Christmas pajjent tonight at church. I'm gonna be the angel who gives the big announcement!" Said Susie.

Just then, Angelica walked into the yard.

"I'll be playing in my new Cynthia playhouse, nobody bother me." Angelica snapped, heading in the direction of a white playhouse with a green roof and a pink door, that was somewhere in between Tommy's house and Spike and Spikfee's doghouse.

"Whatever you say Angelica." Susie sighed.

"Come on guys, let's play." Said Tommy.

"Long ago, in the land of Bethlahem, there lived a couple by the name of Mary and Joseph." Narrated Zack, as Tommy's backyard transformed into the ancient land of Bethlahem.

Tommy as Joseph, and Kimi as Mary, walked along for a very long time.

"I'm getting very tired, and would like to find a place to rest." Said Kimi as Mary.

"Let's go to the Cynthia Inn." Said Tommy as Joseph, the two of them heading in the direction of Angelica's playhouse in reality.

"Hello, is anybody home?" Tommy as Joseph asked, as he knocked on the door.

"What do you want?" Snapped Angelica, the nasty inn keeper.

"We'd just like a place to rest. My feet are tired and I'm expecting a baby." Said Kimi as Mary.

"Well I'm sorry, but there's no room at Cynthia Inn for a couple of dumb babies." Snapped Angelica, as she slammed the door in their faces.

"So Mary and Joseph continued to walk through the land, until Joseph spotted a doghouse, uh, I mean stable." Narrated Zack.

On the way there, they passed by Chuckie, Phil and Lil as sheppards, tending to their flock of sheep, who in reality were Spike and Spikfee.

"We watch our flock of dogs, I mean sheep by night." Said sheppard Phil.

"As we wait for the arrival of the new baby Jesus." Said Lil.

Just then, Tommy as Joseph and Kimi as Mary arrived at the stable, which was in reality, Spike and Spikfee's doghouse.

"How about we have the baby here Mary?" Asked Tommy as Joseph.

"Works for me." Said Kimi as Mary.

"And so Mary and Joseph settled down in the stable, as they waited for the baby Jesus to appear." Narrated Zack.

Just then, the giant star appeared in the sky where in reality, the sun was, and Susie appeared.

"I can't look." Said sheppard Chuckie, covering his eyes.

"You do not need to be afraid sheppard Chuckie, and to all people in the land. I am the angel here to announce the arrival of the baby Jesus, the son of Bob. You will find him lying on a bed of grass wrapped in a blankie." Said the angel Susie.

Sure enough, Dil was inside the stable, wrapped in a blanket, lying on a patch of grass and blowing bubbles.

"That's my Dilly, I mean, Jesus." Said Tommy as Joseph.

Kimi as Mary just smiled.

"And that my friends, is the story of Christmas." Narrated Zack, as the imaginary land of Bethlahem turned back into the reality of Tommy and Dil's backyard, Tommy, Kimi and Dil sitting around in Spike's doghouse, with Zack nearby.

"That was a really neat story, but I thought Mary and Joseph were Jesus's mommy and daddy." Said Kimi.

"They are, on earth, but Jesus is really the son of Bob. He came to earth on Christmas day and lived on earth for well, I'm not sure how long, but a while." Replied Zack.

"Oh, so Christmas is Jesus's Birthday!" Said Tommy.

"Yep." Said Zack.

"Why don't we just celebrate by eating cake and ice cream on Christmas then." Said Tommy.

"You know what? That's a great idea! And, I seem to recall my aunty telling me that when she was little, she and my daddy, her brother use to have Birthday cakes for Jesus on Christmas. Maybe my Aunty will do that at the cabin tomorrow." Said Zack excitedly.

"But what about Santa Clause?" Lil asked.

"Uh, that's a story for another time." Said Zack.

Just then, all of the grown ups returned from their shopping, everyone except Zack's aunt.

"So where is Zack's aunt? Isn't it almost time for the pajjent?" Betty asked.

"Oh, she's at the bakery picking up a special surprise for dessert on Christmas day. I'm so excited that everybody can join us this year for our annual trip to the cabbin. I've rented the RV and cabbin and everything!" Said Didi excitedly.

Just then, Aunty Celeste walked in, carrying a large box.

"I finally made it. I was stuck in line forever at the bakery, or as I like to call it, the automated igloo." Said Aunty Celeste, setting the parsel down on the kitchen table.

"So that overgrown doughnut shop still hasn't taken my advice about automating the sales force. Dag nabbit." Grumbled grandpa Lou, thinking back to that time last year when they had to get a cake for Didi's surprise birthday party, and yes, it was also the same time when the babies went in search of Tommy's mom's present, a frog, while Dil took a ride through the automated bakery system.

"Oh, I take it you've dealt with them before?" Asked Aunty Celeste.

"You have no idea." Replied Lou.

"So, it's gonna be time for the pajjent soon, are the kids ready to go?" Asked Aunty Celeste.

"They're out back." Said Didi, looking out the kitchen window to find them playing in the backyard.

"Susie's the prettiest little angel ever." Said Lucy, as she spotted her daughter in the yard, dressed in her angel costume and playing with the others.

Just then, Aunty Celeste went to the double glass backdoors and peered her head out.

"Come on kids, it's time for the pajjent!" Said Aunty Celeste. Zack, followed by Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, Lil, Kimi, Dil, Susie and Angelica all ran towards Aunty Celeste, and everybody headed off to the church.

They got inside the church, to find a nativity scene set up, Taffy and her band set up over to the side of the scene, and behind where the pajjent would take place, was one of those projecter screens, as this particular church was one of the more contemporary churches, where instead of hymnels, the song lyrics appeared on a screen and everybody sang along. And, the church was one giant room lined with folding chairs, rather than pews. Taffy went up to the band stand and got all set up, while Susie in her angel costume, and Zack, now in his sheep costume, headed up to where the other young children were who were performing in the pajjent. Everything was going smoothly except the baby who was suppose to play Jesus that night got sick, leaving everyone in a panic.

"Please stand by, as we see to resolving this, technical difficulty." Said the minister.

Just then, Zack headed over to where his friends were sitting.

"Come on Dil, you did an excellent job of playing Jesus in our make believe game in the backyard, you think you could do it for real?" Zack asked, taking Dil by the hand.

"But why don't you play Jesus again this year?" Kimi asked.

"Because I'm a sheep, and besides, last year, I was the littlerest one, this year, Dil is. So come on Dilly, will you do it?" Zack asked.

"Yay!" Said Dil.

"Come on Dilly, you can do it!" Said his big brother Tommy encouragingly.

So Zack drug Dil up to the nativity scene.

"Looks like we have our Jesus replacement! I'd like to thank, uh… um…" Said the minister.

"Dil Pickles." Shouted one of the adult voices from the congragation.

"Dil Pickels, for filling in on such short notice. We should also give a big thanks to Peter, King of the Confederacy, for narrating our lovely pajjent tonight." Continued the minister.

Just then, Peter walked up to a podium, and a bunch of Disney characters took their seats in the congregation, Stitch went and sat next to the rugrats.

"And now, let our Christmas pajjent, begin!" Said the minister.

Taffy and the Sault Waters played the music, as the pajjent went on very much so like the make believe the rugrats had played earlier, using the correct biblical words for the most part. Susie did still say son of Bob when it got to her line, this caused several people to laugh. After it was all over, Dil blew several bubbles, and the congregation awed, clapped and cheered.

"You did great Zack, and you too Dilly." Said Tommy.

"And Susie is the bestest angel ever." Said Chuckie.

"Merry Christmas everybody!" All of the Rugrats said in unison.

"Merry Christmas minis." Said Taffy and Peter from the front of the church simultaneously, smiling.

After the pajjent, the gang returned to Tommy and Dil's house, to find there, the same RV they had taken to Los Vegas a while back. Everybody piled in and headed off for the cabin, which surprisingly, they got the exact same cabin they were in the previous year. It was just like the previous year, complete with this time, Betty and Kira heading out to chop down a Christmas tree, decorating it after they got it back, Lulu preparing a lovely Christmas feast, singing Christmas carrols, and opening Christmas presents. And no, Chaz didn't come down the Christmas tree that year, which made Chuckie happy. Then, it came time for dessert. Aunty Celeste finally opened the white square box she had in her possession since she returned with it from the bakery two days before, as the pajjent took place on December 23, and they drove up to the cabin in the RV overnight, getting there sometime the morning of Christmas Eve.

Everybody was seated around the table, including Taffy and her band, Peter, and all of the Disney characters, who joined them for their Christmas festivities, last minute, to see the big surprise that Aunty Celeste had brought. She had brought a round, yellow cake with chocolate icing, and in green letters on top, it said Happy Birthday Jesus, and had a giant candle on top.

"Happy Birthday Jesus." Everybody shouted, and Aunty Celeste let Zack blow out the candle.

"Uh I don't know, are you ok with this whole Jesus thing?" Betty asked Didi.

"Well, according to Lipchitz, we should give the kids freedom to make their own religious decisions, besides, they won't really understand what it's all about till they're older. And maybe I'm Jewish, but Stu isn't, and a while ago, we agreed to be open to both traditions, and Tommy and Dil can decide for themselves someday which way they want to go. But don't tell my parents, they'd probably never forgive me for letting my boys go to that Christmas pajjent the other day." Replied Didi, as everybody dished up slices of cake on their plates.

"Oh I wouldn't worry about it, and Zack I'm sure appreciated the support of his little friends, and Dil saved the pajjent!" Said Aunty Celeste.

"Oh, I guess you're right." Said Didi.

The kids were all seated around a toddler table with their cake.

"This is the bestest Christmas ever!" Said Tommy.

"Yeah, and I never knew we were celebrating somebody's Birthday, how exciting!" Said Chuckie.

"Not just anybody's Birthday, we celebrated the birthday, of the son of Bob!" Said Kimi.

Everybody giggled as they started eating their cake.

The End

Author's Note: I should point out that the idea to have Thanksgiving and Chanukka combined when presenting that flashback earlier to Zack and Kimi's first Thanksgiving and Chanukka with the gang came about as a result that to tell you all the truth, the first day of Chanukka did really fall on Thanksgiving day last year, on November 28, 2013, which in reality, was my nephew Zachary's first Thanksgiving, but in fan fiction land, Zachary was born on October 10, 2012, making fan fiction Zachary for my rugrats stories, one year older than the real one. So, if you guessed that this was the Christmas story of their Christmas in 2013, then you'd be correct! Also, in case anybody was wondering, my real nephew did play the baby Jesus this past year, though it was actually in the epiphany pajjent, but I like the story of Christmas a lot more, so that's why this story focused on the pajjent that followed the birth of Jesus, minus the wise men bringing the gifts, and, I was getting stuck on how to make the epiphany story rugrats style, with what gifts they'd bring Jesus instead of the actual things. If anybody has any ideas, think about it and let me know, I'll come up with an epiphany story next January 6, 2015, if I'm really that bored still by then. And, if I get enough begging and pleading to write up the story titled, Two Holidays Collide, or, "When the Turkey Meets the Meany." Maybe I'll write it up this coming Thanksgiving, provided school doesn't get in the way too much, and, I get lots of requests for the story, and not just from blossom2019. Oh and, I should point out that the toy the rugrats were playing with in the beginning of the story, does really exist, and can be purchased at BJ's, and my real nephew got one of those Mister Christmas things last year, near the end of the holidays. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed that special Christmas treat in the middle of summer, and should you read this story when it is really Christmas, then I hope you have a very Merry Christmas everybody!