A/N: This is SO WEIRD. I haven't written any Doctor Who fanfiction in over a year, but the prompt Doctor/River + "Is there a reason you're naked in my bed?" was in my inbox, sooo... here we are.

Enjoy!

One would think, with apartments being on the moon and all, that they'd at least possess cutting-edge technology - which included security. Unfortunately, the University insisted that it wanted a more 'classical' environment for its students. Not only did this mean that River could break into every single one of her fellow's living spaces without being detected, but it also meant that, when she stuck her key in her lock one Tuesday evening, the lock broke.

"For God's sake," she muttered. She'd spent a long night arguing about the sinking of the Titanic with one of her professors (a stubborn elderly woman who had a habit of chewing on her fingernails and somehow not noticing), she'd been caught in one of the artificial downpours on the way back, and her hair kept getting in her eyes. She was exhausted, mentally wrung-out, and not in the mood for this.

She was tempted to kick the door down, but paying the damages for that (her landlord was an arse) didn't really appeal to her; neither did the possibility of getting arrested again if someone thought she was breaking in. Sighing, River was about to pull out her phone and call the locksmith when it occurred to her that the windows didn't have locks. Not that climbing in through the window was any less suspicious, but she would make less noise…

Grinning in spite of the rain, which still persisted, River hurried back outside and scaled up the side of the building easily. She sighed in relief when she slipped into her sitting room, resolving to take a shower as soon as possible.

Maybe the miserable state of her clothes (and hair) was the reason she missed the TARDIS parked in her front hall. Later, she'd find some way to blame it on the Doctor. Damn him.

She flipped on the light in the room and then pulled out the blaster she kept in her book bag faster than lightning.

"River!" the Doctor exclaimed, sitting up. "What - the school lets you have that?"

River swore inwardly, willing herself to be patient. He's a man child, just treat him like he's three.

She lowered her blaster. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Sorry." He laughed nervously at her slightly murderous look. "I was on Delta-Tres-Five. They were testing out a new chemical there for cleaning up oil spills, and I sort of got… caught up in the middle of it."

River rolled her eyes. "When exactly are you not being a walking disaster? Maybe I should just put you out of your misery."

"I'd really rather you didn't."

"It was a joke, sweetie."

He did seem to light up at her (involuntary, she swore) nickname for him, beaming at her. River rolled her eyes again, but she couldn't help but soften a bit. She put down her blaster, angling it towards the wall, and then took off her boots and threw them by her closet. She paused when she noticed a slight detail that she hadn't before.

"Is there a reason you're naked in my bed?"

The Doctor looked down at himself, like he'd forgotten. "Oh, that. Well, erm… my clothes were sort of… melted. Miracle that my hair survived, really. Or it may have been the sonic screwdriver, I've no idea."

River sighed. Man-child, remember?

"I didn't say I was complaining," she said, giving his waist a pointed look. He shifted slightly, turning red. "Don't you have clothes in the TARDIS? Much as I despise the tweed, you never seem to run out. And it always smells nice enough, like you spray it or something."

"She kicked me out." He pouted, then froze. "When have you ever been close enough to smell me?"

River grinned. So he was a little younger this time.

"Well, in that case," she said, purposefully widening her grin just to see him squirm - then grabbing her very pink bathrobe from her closet and tossing it at him. "You can wear that for now."

He didn't seem at all bothered by the color. He didn't thank her either, suddenly distracted by the textbooks falling out of her book bag and bounding out of the bed. Inwardly, River sighed; so it was going to be one of those visits, was it? Last time he'd taken her to dinner - somehow not a disaster - it'd been nice, really.

They devolved into an argument over her favorite work about the Aztecs ("I've visited them before, you know!" "Well so have I, sweetie; I fail to see your point-") until he suddenly kissed her out of nowhere, leaving her blinking in surprise.

Well. That hadn't happened last time.

"You're going to give a girl some ideas," she breathed, once he pulled away.

He smiled, a little sadly. "Maybe next time. D'you have any tea? No, no, sit! I'll make it!"

As River watched him stumble around her kitchen, somehow managing not to destroy it, she couldn't quite keep the smile off of her face.