It certainly been a while since Urusei Yatsura and after watching the beginning again, I must say, Naruto would be a much better match-up with Lum, Ataru is just as perverted as Jiraiya, maybe even more so, and that's saying something.

Anyway, on with the one-shot, I hope it gets adopted.

Naruto & His Alien WIFE!?

Chapter 1

Pilot

By A Baseball Pitch

It was just a normal day, Naruto and his "comedic relief" sidekick, Ataru, were on their way to the perverted boy's house to play some games, though unfortunately, it's taking them along time to reach Ataru's home, considering the perverted idiot kept eyeing up every woman he can lay his eyes on, though depending on who you ask, the women seem to be eyeing Naruto, ignoring Ataru altogether.

Now here is the reason why Naruto is with Ataru, after his fight with Sasuke 3 years ago, Naruto found himself in this new world, well, new for him, anyway, during his weakened state, Ataru's mother found him, being the kind and concerned mother that she was, she helped Naruto by taking him in and with both parents looking after him, along with Ataru, though mostly it's the other way around because he pervert's tendencies for the opposite sex.

Meaning while growing up Naruto spent a little of his time pulling Ataru's ass out of the fire, but most of the time he let's the boy stew, since he just never learns how to properly treat women.

Anyway, it's been 3 years since he came here, he learned so much since he was 13 when he was dropped into the Moroboshi family, and the years have been both a blessing and a curse, a blessing because of Miss Moroboshi getting him to eat healthier, even his veg, since Naruto was grateful towards the woman for helping him, he couldn't help but listen to everything she asks of him, then there's Mr Moroboshi, who helped him with his studies, teaching him a little of how the world works, again he couldn't help but feel gratitude towards the family, they practically adopted him into their home, of course he still kept his Uzumaki surname, since it holds a place in his heart.

But anyway, back to what he looks like, his body was built like a swimmers body, but with compact muscles, showing he still trained, but when it came to chakra, he couldn't access it for some reason, almost like it was there but out of reach, he couldn't even contact the fox, so he was stuck in a new world without chakra.

He was quite tall for his age, reaching 180cm, making most women have perverted thoughts about the blond, but because he was still naive about the birds and the bees, he could never read the signs, which cause Ataru to sometimes grab him by the collar of his shirt to try and shake him, but instead the perv gets a "slight" conk on the head, but because of Naruto's strength it cause Ataru to kiss the pavement hard.

"OUCH!?"

Hearing a yelp of pain from Ataru, Naruto looks down and see's the boy on the floor with a red mark on his face, "Hey perv, are you alright, what happened?"

Hearing the question, Ataru looks up and see's Naruto looking down at him, a baseball rolling next to his head, "Nothing Naruto, I'm alright." Turns out he doesn't really care about being called a perv.

Looking next to Naruto, with Naruto doing the same, both boys see a short old monk, who at this moment, was pointing at Ataru, "It's you, I had a dream about you last involving a powerful electrical discharge!" The monk exclaims, with his hat suddenly pointing upwards.

After hearing what the monk said, Naruto was busy holding his gut and covering his mouth, trying and failing not to laugh at such wording, but Ataru had other thoughts instead.

A few minutes later, Ataru was finished beating the old man for the misunderstanding, with said old man trying to apologies and explain about it as well, but the idiot boy wasn't gonna listen and stomped away, Naruto shaking his head at Ataru's over-reaction, never hearing the monk pray for Ataru's life.

As they were walking down the path, Naruto having enough of Ataru's perverted slow walking, decided enough was enough, grabbing the back of Ataru's collar, Naruto drags the boy along, "Come on ya pervert, we need to get home remember, your dad said something important came up remember."

Not being bothered by Naruto dragging him, Ataru just kept looking around at the women passing by, all of them looking at Naruto, but he didn't care, Ataru just enjoyed the view,"Hmmm, huh, what, you say something Naruto?"

That line caused Naruto to gain a slight twitch, since it was something Kakashi sometimes says, but the boy was worse than Kakashi, yeah, sure Kakashi read those slut-books in public, but he never flirted as bad as Ataru, "Thinking about it now, I don't think anyone is as bad as Ataru, though Pervy-Sage is a close second, my god, I can't imagine Pervy-Sage and Ataru teaming up, no women would be safe with them pervs around!" Naruto shudders at such a thought.

Suddenly a black car pulls up, grabbing the 2 boys, taking Naruto by surprise, since the men didn't have any ill intent, though Ataru was struggling and yelling, Naruto looking extremely confused about what was happening, "Um, do you mind telling us what is going on, why did you kidnap us and why are you taking us back home?"

Naruto was calm on the surface, he knew he could take these men out, no problem, the only problem was Ataru, if Naruto began fighting the perv would be dragged into it, Ataru finally calming down and sitting, the old man with the fedora hat calmly replies, "Everything will be revealed when we reach your house."

Both boys could see military vehicles outside, with choppers following them, causing them to be even more confused, that is until the car suddenly stopped outside their house, causing Naruto to jerk forward slightly thanks to his training, though Ataru was flung forward, hitting the glass window and sliding down, "Please be careful with the car young man, you or your parents don't have enough money for repair bills."

After that the 3 make their way into the house, Ataru going first, with a friend of the two named Miyake Shinobu hugging Ataru, in worry, with Naruto wondering why a sweet girl like Shinobu would love such a perverted wannabe-playboy, but figured love works in weird ways, even for idiot perverts.

Once Ataru finished making a fool of himself, the old man walked them towards the living room, where Ataru was about to enter first, but when his eyes met a giant of a man, he turned tail, "Nope, I'm not going in there."

Naruto being curious, moved towards the living room, seeing the giant for himself, blinking a few times to make sure he wasn't seeing things, the old Naruto would've blurted out something like, 'HOLY CRAP YOU'RE HUGE!' or something, but the Naruto that's standing in front of the being was now smarter, knowing he'd probably get pommelled for saying such a thing, "(Ahem,) Nice to meet you sir, my name is Naruto Uzumaki, can I please ask why it is you are here?"

With the old man introducing the giant as an alien called Mr Invader, "That name is far too 'on the nose,'" Naruto thought to himself with a sweat-drop.

The strange "man" simply smiled, "Well aren't you a respectable young man, my name is Mr Invader, it's a pleasure to meet you, here's my card." With now known alien hand Naruto his card, which looked like an A3 size card.

Once the introductions are over with, the old man began to explain, "It turns out that the world is hoping on you Ataru to save it, if not then our planet will be invaded by Mr Invader's people." The only problem was Ataru didn't want to do it.

Naruto, having enough of Ataru's perverted and selfish tendencies, decided to do something, moving behind Ataru, Naruto gave the perv a swift chop to the neck, knocking him out, "If it's alright with everyone, I'll take the perv's place, since he's got "other" things on his mind."

The old man, surprised at the question, merely replied, "Um, well, t-that depends on Mr Invader, what do you think sir."

The giant alien simply smiles, "I see no reason for Naruto to not replace Ataru, he seems like a strong lad and from what I can see he has a heart of gold."

This of course made Naruto blush, rubbing the back of his head, Naruto says, "Oh come on, I'm not that great, I just didn't want the perv getting hurt, that's all!" Naruto then began to mumble to himself, causing the room to be lighter.

Suddenly, the room began to rumble, "Well it seems she's finally arrived, perfect timing too."

Before Naruto could ask, a blinding light appeared in the room, causing Naruto to cover his eyes before he could lose his vision, the light also caused a slight blast that sent Ataru into the sliding doors, along with breaking the windows, thankfully, Naruto was able to withstand the blast.

Once his vision finally cleared, there standing before him was a beautiful green haired girl with horns and fangs, the giant alien places a hand on the girl's shoulder, "This is Lum, she's my daughter who takes after her mother, she will be the one you face in your game of tag for the earth."

Lum looked towards Naruto, having a slight puzzled look, "Daddy, are you sure this is the one I'll be facing, he doesn't look anything like his profile picture!?"

Her father smiled and rubs the back of his head, "I'm sorry dear, but there's been a slight change of plan, Ataru didn't want to face you, so his friend Naruto Uzumaki here offered himself to take his place."

Hearing this, Lum became surprised, this teen, Naruto, has taken her opponent's place, though a plus side was that Naruto was handsome and she could also tell he was strong too, "Nice to meet you Naruto, I hope we can enjoy ourselves in this game."

Naruto just knew he was in for quite some trouble, considering how the girl has such confidence, "Yeah, let's give it our best."

So starts Naruto's adventure, will he be able to save the earth by playing a game of tag by grabbing Lum's horns, or will he fail, it all depends on what he does.

The End.

There you have it, Naruto taking Ataru's place in the game of tag for the earth, I'll help out how Naruto will become married to Lum with whoever adopts this.

Also as you can see I kept Ataru around as well because he's more of the "Comic Relief" type of character, since the perv is accident-prone, also someone had to get shocked by Lum's lightning, since Ataru would try to flirt with Lum, but Lum isn't that type of girl and would electrocute the pervert if he tried anything, also she'd help Shinobu out as well to try and keep the idiot in line.

As for the pairing(s) it'll be up to whoever adopts, as long as Naruto/Lum are the main pair, it's your choice.

This is up for adoption, since I'm not too good at writing lemons, considering how Lum is it's bound to happen with Naruto.

I Do Not Own Naruto Or Urusei Yatsura.