Disclaimer: I own nothing.
It was three in the morning and I was sitting in the Slytherin Common Room doing my Potions homework. Every time I had to write another essay on a Sleeping Draught or something similarly stupid, I was thinking that I would have done better in Ravenclaw… But five years ago I was stupid enough to be beg that stupid Hat…
I was just thinking whether getting a detention for not doing my homework was better than writing that when two people came into the Common Room from outside. Snape and professor Slughorn.
"Mister Snape,I hope you do understand how serious all this is. Under no circumstances you might tell anyone…", - he stopped abruptly noticing me.
"Er… Mister Black… What are you doing here at this time of night!" – he asked me disapprovingly.
"My Potions essay, professor!" – I replied immediately.
"Er… Very well then… Continue doing… Mister Snape you do understand me, don't you?" – Snape nodded and with that Potions sadist left.
I looked at Snape, frowning. He didn't look well. His robe was torn in several places. He scratches on his hands and face that were already healing due to Madam Pomfrey (I assumed). He looked both frightened and angry.
"What trouble did you get in this time?" – I asked with a hint of smile on my face. He could have gone to the Forbidden Forest and met a spider there. Or he could have simply gotten into fight with Missis Norris.
"As you might have heard professor, Regulus, - he said angrily. – I am not authorised to tell you anything… I will be expelled if I tell you. But let me make one thing clear: your brother is stupid and dangerous. As well as hi other friends. They almost killed me!"
He stormed towards the boys' dormitories. And I burst into laughing. Well, that was some stupid joke of my brother! Nothing to be surprised or worried about, I thought. Only that… Why couldn't Snape tell anyone about what had happened? Strange at the very least… I returned to my essay, making a mental note to apologise to Snape for not being sympathetic. I need his help with Potions, anyway.
What I saw next morning, and during the whole week after that, at first surprised me and than started to worry. Although I heard no one talking about anything bad that had happened that night, I could see that several things had changed drastically.
For starters, there were no sign of any pranks from Potter and his gang for a whole week. Next, they were no longer spending time together. I mean, Potter, Lupin and that boy Peter who's surname I was never able to memorise were still hanging out together. But Sirius was never seen with them. Actually, I rarely saw my brother in public for all that week. That was worrying. My brother is a person who needs company, friends, jokes and a busy social life. What happened?
We rarely spent time together at Hogwarts. A year's difference, different Houses and my disinterest in pranks did there job well enough. And after he left, it got even more difficult. But there wasn't a day when I didn't hear about him cursing Snape or turning Rosier in a frog. That week – nothing.
I would have asked Potter about that but we weren't on friendly terms. There was no way asking Snape. He made it clear that his lips were sealed.
I started looking for my brother myself. But it was only two weeks after the incident when I finally managed to find him. It was a Hogsmeade weekend. I didn't see him going there with the others and assumed that he really didn't go.
I found him in an empty classroom. He was sitting by the desk, his face in hands. I would have thought that he was crying. But it wasn't possible. I saw him on the verge of tears once, about a year and a half ago. That was before he left home and went to leave with Potters. Well… What could have happened now.
I took a deep breath. I needed to know what happened. God… Why it's always so difficult just to ask him "What's up?" or "What's bothering you?". Even when I almost know myself what the problem is! But that time I didn't have a slightest idea what happened! What was I supposed to do?
"Sirius?" – I asked him hesitantly.
His head shot up. He wasn't crying but his face was hollow and he had dark circles under his eyes. I wouldn't have been surprised if he had had no sleep for the whole week.
"What are you doing here? You must be at Hogsmeade with everyone else", - he told angrily.
I raised my eyebrows: "Really? I don't think you have any reason to tell me where I must be, Sirius. I am capable of deciding for myself".
"Well, I am sure that you are capable to spend your free time somewhere else!" – he replied coldly.
I wasn't welcome to spend time in his company. That's what it meant. But somehow I didn't give a damn about whether he wanted my company or not. If I wanted to know what was wrong, I always found a way to know.
"I highly doubt that, brother", - I replied calmly, settling in a chair directly in front of Sirius.
"Regulus, just get your ass out of here", - he said, almost desperately.
I reached towards him and squeezed his hand: "Sirius, you had a quarrel or what? And what it has to do with Snape?"
He jerked away and stood up: "Ask him if you are so curious!"
"I asked. But he is afraid that he'll be expelled", - I replied.
"Well! I am afraid as well! Now get out of here!" – he snarled.
I shook my head resolutely. I knew that if had really wanted me out he would have been more persuasive. He would have thrown me out with his own hands or threatened me with his wand. But he didn't do that. He wanted to tell me but… But I didn't really know what…
"Sirius… I doesn't matter whether you left or not… You are still my brother… What had happened?" – I whispered, squeezing his hand again and making him sit down.
"I can't tell you, Reggie… I've already messed lots of things up… I can't continue doing that", - he whispered brokenly.
I sight: "What did you do, Sirius".
"I told you that I can't tell you! I betrayed them… All three of them! That's what I did", - he shouted. He closed his face with his hands and started crying. I winced. What was I supposed to do?
I got up, set near him and hugged him by the shoulders.
"Sirius… Listen. I don't know what you did and whether it was as horrible as you seem to think… But there is nothing that real friendship can't forgive… I am sure of that… Did you apologise?" – I whispered.
He looked strangely at me and gave me his bark-like laugh: "A Slytherin talking about friendship! World must be falling apart! There's no point in apologising… I can see it in there eyes, Reggie…"
"Trying won't kill you… And you do need them… Potter, Peter, Lupin. And they need you", - I stood up, giving his shoulder a final squeeze.
He shook his head: "Why are you doing that? You where very much against me leaving… You would have been glad if I returned, wouldn't you?"
"I would. But you wouldn't. I can survive there. You can't. It might sound strange… but I love you, Sirius", - I left. I didn't look back.
I could only assume that he did apologise after all because a week after our talk I saw them all four together again, probably planning something nasty.
Years after that I finally coaxed Snape to tell me what it was all about. That was well after I found out that Lupin is a werewolf. I still don't understand how my brother could have done such a stupid thing… He almost lost the most precious thing he had in his life. His friends… I would never have done such a thing… Or would I?
I will never get a chance to find out as Death Eaters don't have friends. We only have useful alliances and connections…
