Legolas
Legolas jumped aside as Estel stormed past. He sighed, not entirely surprised. Elrond came out of the study, his shoulders slumped.
"He didn't take it well?" the prince guessed.
"No, not at all. He'll be fine when he calms down, I'm sure. I can see why he's upset."
So could Legolas. They had all lied to Estel. It had been against his heart to do so, but Elrond had secured his promise not to tell the man of his lineage, not until he came of age.
"I'll talk to him." If Estel wanted to talk to him, that was. Legolas had his doubts.
"May you have better luck than I did."
Legolas hurried to Estel's quarters, and cautiously knocked on the door. There was no response, so he pushed the door open. Estel was standing by the window, and turned when Legolas came in.
"Did you know?"
This first question was expected, but Legolas still winced. "Yes. I gave Lord Elrond my word that I'd let him be the one to tell you."
"You lied to me," Estel accused. "For years. How could you keep this from me, Legolas?"
"He's your father, Estel. It was his choice to make, not mine."
"No, it wasn't! Ada never kept it from me that I'm adopted – though had I been an elf and not a man, perhaps he would have tried to lie even about that – but he never told me that my birth father was the rightful king of Gondor. I had a right to know about that years before now! Yesterday, I was Estel Elrondion. Now, I'm supposed to be a king."
Estel's expression crumpled. "How can I be a king, mellon nin? It's too much to bear."
Legolas stepped forward and put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "You don't have to do it before you're ready. You are still far too young to be thinking of it. Twenty is still a child. Worry not over it, gwador."
The man heaved a sigh. "I'd like to be alone now, please."
Legolas was reluctant, but he nodded. "I will be in my rooms if you need me."
He didn't see Estel for the rest of the afternoon, but when he did, his best friend seemed in much better spirits. He even joined his family for dinner. He spoke nothing of the revelation from earlier, and Elrond and the twins took their cues from him.
After dinner, Legolas went for a walk with his friend. Estel was uncharacteristically quiet, and the prince left him to his thoughts.
"I want to go out into the wilds."
Legolas nodded. "I will come with you."
"I was hoping you would. We'll leave tomorrow."
They'd been on hunting trips together many times before, but this time, something was different about Estel. Of course, that was to be expected. He'd just had his whole life turned upside down. Still, Legolas was uneasy.
Estel was cheerful and lighthearted, but there were times when a shadow crossed his face and his shoulders would slump, as though unable to bear the weight of expectations placed upon them.
Legolas wished he could lift that weight, but he was no more able to change Estel's birthright than the man was. Often, when Estel became downcast and broody, he'd take a walk alone in the forest, which seemed to help.
Legolas didn't like it – something about those walks made him uneasy – but he knew his friend was a capable warrior and could take care of himself, so he gave him his space. Estel would work through this in his own time. He was actually coping a lot better than Legolas would have predicted so soon after being told everything.
About a week into their trip, Estel had just gone off for another walk when Legolas caught an unwelcome whiff of orc. Seeking to warn his friend, he hurried after Estel's footprints.
As he got closer, Legolas picked up the alarming scent of human blood, and broke into a run. He burst upon Estel, who jumped and scurried behind a tree at the sight of him, but not before Legolas saw the blood on his arms.
He sighed. "Estel, I've already seen that you're injured. Come out and let me treat it."
"No, go away, Legolas!"
Estel was just as bad as Legolas about hiding his injuries – Legolas really had no room to talk – but that didn't mean he was going to let the man get away with it. "There are orcs about, mellon nin. We can't linger."
Estel reluctantly came out from behind the tree, his sleeves pulled down, covering any blood.
"Let me see it."
"We should get moving. How many orcs are there?"
"Not many, I don't think. Enough for us to kill, we just need to be on our guard. Or if necessary, we can outrun them on the horses. Now, show me your arms. How did you manage to injure both of them?"
"They're fine," Estel muttered.
"They're bleeding. Come, Estel, don't be stubborn about this. You know you won't win."
"No."
Legolas knew that he couldn't allow the wounds to go untreated, despite Estel's objections. He was strong enough to hold his friend down if he needed to, but he was reluctant to resort to force. Instead, he tried persuasion.
"Come now, you are not usually so difficult. It will be quick, I promise." Why was Estel looking at him like that? He looked scared, a look the man had never directed at Legolas before.
Estel's shoulders slumped as he nodded. He finally held out his arms. Legolas gently rolled up the sleeves to reveal the bleeding inner forearms. Instead of the graze he'd been expecting, having thought Estel must have fallen, he found rows and rows of cuts. They weren't deep, but they were numerous and many were still bleeding.
He stared at them, perplexed. "What happened?"
Estel didn't answer, his lip quivering.
Legolas' eyes were drawn to the dagger at his friend's belt, which had bloody fingerprints on it. Ice seemed to take hold of his heart. "Did you… did you do this to yourself?"
The man just closed his eyes, his head drooping down and his expression one of shame.
"Estel?"
"Yes," he whispered.
Legolas reacted instinctively, pulling his friend into a hug. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. "I thought you were coping. I didn't realize…"
Estel was shaking, and Legolas realized the man was crying. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Estel wailed. "I know I'm weak, pathetic – who would want me as a king?"
"Hush, do not even think such things. You are not weak, mellon nin, far from it."
"Then why can't I cope without this?" Estel pulled back, staring at Legolas with tear filled eyes. "What's wrong with me?"
"Nothing is wrong with you," Legolas said fiercely. "Anyone would react badly after getting the news you just did. This isn't a healthy way to deal with it, but I do not think any less of you for it, you understand? All this means is I have to help you find other ways. You have helped me many times before. I will help you, mellon nin."
He pulled Estel's head back to his shoulder, letting his friend cry. He didn't think the man had done so since Elrond had told him of his heritage, and it was long overdue. This was far from the first time Legolas had comforted his friend, but there was something about the desperation with which Estel clung to him that told Legolas that the man was more shaken by this than he had been by anything in his life before – as though more evidence was needed.
He pressed a kiss to the top of Estel's head, murmuring soft, comforting words and assurances.
Legolas rocked his friend gently, stroking his hair as the man's body shook with his weeping. They stayed where they were until Estel's sobs subsided. Legolas pulled back and started rummaging through the man's pack, bringing out a healing unguent. He gently cleaned the blood off the wounds and spread it over them.
"Give me your knife, Estel."
"No. I need it."
"I won't let you hurt yourself."
His eyes were shining with tears again. "You don't understand. It's too much, sometimes. I feel the pressure building up inside me, and there's no other way to release it. I feel like it'll burn me from the inside out. I won't survive it."
Legolas' heart clenched in pain for his friend. "I will help you survive it. Please, let me help you."
The stubborn man shook his head. "You can't help me. No one can undo what is my responsibility by birth."
"No one can undo that, but we can help you shoulder the burden, myself and your family. You are not alone, gwador."
Estel bit his lip. "I don't think I can do it without cutting myself. I'm sorry.."
This, Legolas would not back down on. "I will not let your hurt yourself." He lunged, and had the knife out of its sheath before his friend had time to react. Legolas snatched the man's sword, which was a few feet away, and threw both it and the knife to the side, out of reach.
"You think that'll work?" Estel let out a hollow laugh that held no hint of joy. "You can't keep everything sharp away from me, mellon nin. You think you can pick up every sharp rock in the forest? Or stop me breaking a round one into a makeshift knife?"
He was right, Legolas realized. If Estel really was that determined, he'd need to be watched so that he didn't harm himself, and the prince couldn't do it all himself. He'd have to sleep at some point, which would leave Estel unsupervised and vulnerable.
"Come, we will make for Imladris at once. If we hurry, we can make it back in three days; we're not that far from there at this location."
Estel's face suddenly filled with panic. "No! Legolas, you can't tell Ada and my brothers, please."
"Of course I have to tell them. How else can they help you? Do not be afraid, Estel, they love you. They will help you, as will I."
He'd expected his words to reassure the man, but on the contrary, Estel simply looked more terrified. "No, no," he whispered.
Then he did the last thing Legolas would have expected. He turned and ran.
Growling, Legolas leapt up and followed him. He would have easily caught the man, except at that moment, a whistling in his ear was his only warning of something approaching. He threw himself to the side, and a spear flew past his head. Estel hadn't heard and kept running, swiftly disappearing from sight.
Legolas reluctantly turned to the orcs, who had snuck up on him while he'd been distracted with Estel. There were only five, which he could easily kill, but that would give Estel time to escape. There was nothing to done about it; Legolas couldn't leave the orcs alive.
He turned to face them, hoping he could be done with this quickly.
Aragorn
Aragorn expected Legolas to catch him at any moment, but he was relieved when he somehow managed to outrun the elf. He slowed to catch his breath, trying to ignore the familiar pressure building in his chest.
It was no good. The full weight of what was expected of him took his breath away, and Aragorn felt like he was being crushed by it. He frantically searched the forest floor, finding a small rock and bashing it against a larger one to create a jagged edge.
It wasn't as sharp as his knife, but he made do, pressing harder than he did with his dagger. He closed his eyes, relishing the sting of the flesh parting, feeling like the weight was lifting from his chest with every stroke.
Only when Aragorn opened his eyes did he realize he'd made a mistake. These wounds weren't light like the ones he'd been making over the past week. They gaped and pumped blood. He immediately felt sick. These would have to be stitched at once, but he'd left all his healing supplies with his pack.
He started staggering through the trees, hoping he could make it.
"Estel!"
He looked up to see Legolas running toward him through the end of a long, flickering tunnel. He was vaguely aware of his friend's arms catching him just before he hit the ground.
When he woke, he was on a horse, and Legolas' arms were around him. He groaned as his own arms flared with pain. They immediately slowed, and Legolas' concerned voice was in his ear.
"How are you feeling?"
"Fine," Aragorn lied. "How… how close are we to Imladris?"
Legolas shifted guiltily. "We'll be there soon. We're already in sight of the outer border."
"WHAT! I was unconscious for that long?"
"Well… I knew you wouldn't agree to coming, and after what happened the last time I told you we were going back… I gave you a sedating tea while you were out, after stitching your wounds."
Aragorn immediately started struggling. "I'm not going! Let me down!"
"No. You need more help than I know how to give you alone."
No matter how he struggled, he couldn't break away. He was still weak blood loss. Aragorn hung his head as helpless tears started. He felt so ashamed. What had happened to him, that he suddenly couldn't cope without slashing his own arms open? That he couldn't even control his actions enough not to give himself a potentially fatal injury?
"Estel? Talk to me, please." Legolas frantically wiped the tears from his cheeks, speeding up the horse until they were galloping, clearly eager to get them to Elrond and his care, both emotional an physical.
"Don't tell them," he whispered brokenly. "Legolas… I can't – I –"
He broke off, hunching down, wanting only to disappear. He needed to cut. This was too much. He had to have release.
Legolas' arms were tight around him. "Talk to me, mellon nin. Let me help you."
Aragorn was sobbing too hard to talk, and the next thing he knew, the horse was stopping and Legolas was pulling him off and into another hug. He clung to his friend, feeling his legs give out. The prince lowered them both to the ground, rocking and hushing him.
"It will be alright, Estel, don't worry…"
"It's not going to be alright! How can any of this ever be alright?"
"Talk to me, please. I can help, Estel, if you will only let me."
"It's – it's crushing me," he cried. "Please, Legolas, I need my knife. Help me…"
"I will not let it crush you, gwador. I will take the weight for you. I am here. Give it all to me."
Never had Aragorn felt so vulnerable as he did now. He cried desperately into Legolas' shoulder, holding onto his friend like the prince was the last solid thing in middle earth. "How? I don't know how!"
"Open your mind to me," Legolas breathed. "Let me take it."
Aragorn knew what his friend was talking about, but he also knew that Legolas couldn't do it. The twins had a bond such as the prince spoke of, where they could lift troublesome emotions from each other's minds. It had, however, taken them years of learning and practice to master it.
Elrond had had this bond with his own brother, and there had been cases of the bond being formed between those who weren't related by blood, but for it to happen spontaneously without extensive training was almost unheard of.
Still, Legolas seemed determined to try, and at this point, Aragorn was willing to try anything. He held tightly to his friend and let go, giving up all of his pain, all of his despair and suffering.
It was as though there was a bright light in his mind, pulling away the darkness. Legolas gasped and stiffened, but didn't break away.
With every passing second, Aragorn felt lighter, as if the weight on his heart was being physically lifted. He glanced up into Legolas' eyes and realized that it was. The prince's face was covered in sweat, and his eyes were shadowed with the same pain Aragorn himself had been feeling only moments ago.
He scrambled out of his friend's grip. "Stop it! You're hurting yourself!"
Now it was Legolas whose shoulders were slumped, and Aragorn immediately hated himself. Somehow, they had established the healing bond, but now, Legolas was carrying his pain.
"No, no, give it back…"
With difficulty, the elf lifted his gaze to meet Aragorn's. "Give me a minute, Estel."
Aragorn watched as Legolas closed his eyes, taking several deep breaths. When he opened them, they were no longer shadowed by pain.
"How – how did you do that?"
"It was not my pain. It had no hold on me, and dissolved quickly when I confronted it. How are you feeling?"
Aragorn once more threw himself into his friend's arms. "I don't care how I'm feeling, you stupid elf! I care about you."
"I am fine, mellon nin, do not worry over me. I think it worked, yes? You look better."
"I feel better," he admitted. "I don't want to give you my pain, though. I would never hurt you."
"It only hurt for a moment," Legolas reassured. "I told you I would help you."
Aragorn gave a shaky laugh. "You did. I can't believe it. The mind bond is rare, especially without instruction. How did you do it?"
"I don't know… I just knew that you were in pain, and I had to help you."
It was amazing how light Aragorn felt, just like before Elrond had given him the fateful news. He hadn't though he'd ever fully dislodge the weight on his heart… but he supposed he hadn't. Legolas had.
"Do we still need to tell Ada?"
"There is no need," said a voice behind him.
Aragorn spun around to see Elrond and the twins, hanging back, their expressions torn somewhere between shock and wonder. He realized too late that when Legolas had changed him out of his bloodstained clothing, the prince had put him in a short sleeved tunic. His stitched arms were all too visible, and a glance at his family showed that they had not missed the sight.
"Ada? El? What are you doing here?"
"Elladan and Elrohir came to me with news of a mysterious light in the trees just shy of Imladris. I had already been on my way to the stables, having sensed what was happening. I am glad you were able to bond in this way. It certainly makes things easier."
"What do you mean?"
Elrond came down and sat in front of him. "I knew what you were doing, Estel," he said gently. "I can always tell when my sons are hurting. If Legolas had not helped you, I would have healed you myself, albeit not in the same way. This bond will serve both of you well, though. You'll need instruction, of course, which I can provide."
"As can we." The twins sat down on either side of him. Elladan turned one of Aragorn's arms over, looking sadly at the stitches. "If Ada had told us, we never would have let you leave."
Aragorn tugged his arm away, tucking both of them against his stomach. "You're not… you're not ashamed of me?"
He looked particularly at his father, terrified that his fears of being weak and worthless were about to be confirmed.
"Of course I am not, ion nin. I never have been, and this does not change that."
"When you're healed, I'm going to thump you for even thinking that, little brother," Elrohir muttered. "Really, Ada told you who you are, he didn't take away all of your common sense."
"Shut up," Legolas snapped. "You severely shook his confidence, of course he's going to have doubts about himself."
The twins looked taken aback at the sudden, ferocious defense. Legolas was their friend too and usually slow to anger. Aragorn was still leaning back in his friend's arms, and had no desire to move any time soon. In fact, he wanted more than ever to sleep.
Elrond's healer side seemed to take over. "You need to eat, ion nin. By the look of it, you have lost a lot of blood. Come, let us get you home, then after a meal, you can sleep."
Aragorn allowed Legolas to help him up, but once they were standing, he once more threw his arms around his friend's neck. "Thank you, gwador," he whispered.
Legolas hugged him back just as tightly. "Whenever you need me, I am here for you, Estel. Promise me, the next time you feel like you have to hurt yourself, you will come to me."
"I promise." He grinned as a thought hit him. "You know, this could end up badly for you. The bond works both ways."
"I know that. I am not afraid of your presence in my mind."
"Good, because when you return to Greenwood, I am coming with you. I am not going to let you hold onto the ridiculous guilt you bear whenever one of your warriors dies fighting the spiders. I've tried telling you it's not your fault, and you won't listen. Now, you'll have to. You will suffer no more over it, you have my word on that."
Legolas' eyes narrowed. "You wouldn't dare…"
"You're the one who initiated it, did you really think I'd let you help me without helping you in return when you needed it?"
The prince sighed. "I suppose not. This will take some getting used to."
Aragorn let the twins help him onto Legolas' horse, not bothering to argue that he was well enough to ride on his own; it was not an argument he would win, especially not with Ada here.
The twins stayed close on either side of him as they headed back for Imladris, already talking about all the pranks they were going to pull on Aragorn for daring to think that they would ever feel anything but love for him.
"I will protect you," Legolas murmured in his ear.
For the first time since learning his true name, Aragorn laughed.
