(Dawn's Pov)
Giles hugged Willow and then let her go so he could face Anya and Xander. Anya's arms were around Xander's waist and her face was buried in his chest. Tara laced her fingers with Willow's and held Willow's forearm. I looked up at Spike who was standing there, arms crossed, and eyes locked on nothing. I wiped my wet cheeks and looked back at Giles.
"I assume one of you will stay here with Dawn." Giles said with a slight frown. "If not I am free to stay." Anya looked at me and frowned, sadness overcoming her features.
"Dawn, I would stay but I don't know how much help I would be." Anya sighed. I smiled half-heartedly at her.
"That's alright. You and Xander should probably go be home anyways." I said, letting my brave grown up side shine. Xander and Anya took turns hugging me bye.
"Sorry Dawnster, see ya tomorrow." Xander smiled nervously. Anya squeezed me awkwardly.
"Yes, we will impose in your sad life tomorrow." Anya said in a mock cheerfulness. Willow narrowed her eyes at Anya but didn't say anything. I returned to my place beside Spike. Spike looked down at me with a question mark look.
"Spike?" I asked. Spike shifted to face me fully. I could tell he'd been crying though he was clearly trying not to show that fact.
"What is it Nibblet?" I took Spike's arm and led him down the hallway and into the kitchen, hoping we left unnoticed. I sat on the barstool and rested my head on the island. Spike sat next to me and lifted my chin with two gentle fingers. "Well pet, you gonna have to tell me why you led me back here." I looked at him and blinked back tears.
"I want to be with someone strong right now." I told him my voice barely audible. Spike sighed and pulled me into his embrace.
"Pet, they aren't weak." I sobbed into his chest. "Shh…don't cry Little bit." I looked up at Spike and he wiped away my tears with his thumb. "It'll turn out right." I shook my head.
"How can it turn out right Spike when I lost my anchor?" Spike looked at me and tilted his head to the side.
"Buffy was your strength?" I nodded and closed my eyes since he wouldn't let me look away.
"Buffy was my everything, even before mom died." Spike kissed my forehead gently and didn't move away.
"I'm so sorry Dawn." He whispered against my skin. I didn't know what to do. I'd only ever been held by two guys not including Xander and my father. Both had been wicked bad and now there was Spike, the big bad of Sunnydale.
"Don't be." I said calmly. "It's my fault we couldn't save her." Spike pulled back and looked at me.
"Nibblet." He said his tone slightly harsher. "You cannot blame yourself for what she did."
"If I had just…"
"Just what Dawn, jumped off and died so that we could have a depressed Buffy; a lot bit of good that would have done Pet." His tone was slightly sarcastic.
"Spike I can't live without her! We can't live without her." I looked at him through glazed eyes. "I'm afraid; there isn't anyone here to protect us anymore."
"You got the big bad kitten." I couldn't help but smile at him. "I won't let any beasties get you Nibblet." He was being sweet which was a rare sighting in and of itself.
"Spike, will you stay tonight?" I asked. Spike's blue eyes widened and he shook his head.
"No Love, you don't need me." He stood up slowly. "You got big Red and her witchy girl." I looked at Spike and sighed.
"I don't want them here Spike." I said softly. "I want someone who can think clearly and actually protect me." Spike looked at me and then his face softened.
"Alright Kitten." He sighed and looked around the kitchen. "So what do we do?" I stood up and looked at the microwave clock. It told me the time was midnight.
"Now I go to sleep." I told him. Spike rolled his eyes and sighed. "I can make up the couch for you." I offered.
"Dawn, he isn't staying." Willow's voice came from behind me. Spike sighed and his face hardened.
"If it isn't Red." Spike said his tone completely different than it had been with me. I turned to face Tara and Willow.
"Willow, I want him here."
"D-Dawn, y-you really aren't thinking clearly." Tara said, jumping quickly to defend Willow. Spike smirked and stepped up beside me.
"Kitten here seems to want the big bad by her side tonight." Willow took a step closer to Spike.
"Even if I did allow you to stay in this house tonight you wouldn't be by anywhere near Dawn!" Willow snapped. I stepped in between them and glared at Willow.
"This is my house and I want Spike here. As a matter of fact I want him to sleep in my room." Willow looked at Spike and then at me. Tara put her hand on Willow's arm and shook her head slowly.
"Fine, but you leave the door open." Willow turned away from us. "And Spike, I will stake you if you even look at Dawn while she sleeps."
"Wouldn't dream of it Pet." Spike said sarcastically as we watched them go into the dining room and then probably into the living room. "Come on Kitten, let's tuck you in." Spike put his hand tenderly on my shoulder. I nodded and led him towards the stairs. Willow and Tara were curled up on the couch together crying. Spike and I silently walked up the stair and went into my room. I shut the door behind us and Spike looked at me curiously.
"I'm fifteen Spike." I told him. Spike smirked and leaned on the closet door.
"Little miss rebellion should have seen that one coming." He crossed his arms and leaned his head against the door frame. I stood up on my toes and kissed him on the cheek.
"Thank you." I whispered. Spike smirk deepened.
"Love, it's dangerous to kiss a big bad." Spike said, placing a kiss slightly closer to my lips.
"I'm not afraid of what goes bump in the night." Spike looked down at me, amusement clear on his face.
"I think you may spend too much time with me love." I shook my head and suddenly found the floor interesting. Spike put his finger under my chin and made me look at him. "Why'd you really bring me up here Pet?" I blushed slightly. My real intentions were to be like Buffy and rid myself of problems by dumping them on the cutest guy.
"I just don't want to be alone." I said as I pulled away and went to straighten up my already neat desk. I picked up the pencil cup and went to move it. The cup slipped out of my hands and hit the ground, shattering. I gasped and knelt down to pick it up. Spike sighed and knelt down as well. We tried to quickly pick the pieces up so that Willow wouldn't freak when she came up to check on me. I dropped the glass in the trashcan under my desk. Spike put his in the trash and then grabbed my wrist. "Ow." I gasped, when his grip became tighter. Spike held his palm to his head and growled.
"Can you not do that Love?" He frowned; when he was recovered from the shock he turned my hand over to look at the palm. Blood began to drip from my finger and into his lap. "That glass gave you a parting gift." He muttered more to himself than to me. I looked at my finger and then to the door as I heard Willow running up the stairs.
"Spike do something, she'll freak if she sees the blood." I said frantically. Spike sighed and looked at the door as he pulled me into a standing position next to him. He put my finger up to his mouth and his tongue snaked out, licking the blood away. Willow knocked briefly on the door before throwing it open. When the door opened Spike was leaned against my closet door and I was on my bed looking at Willow. "What?" I asked offended. Willow looked at me then to Spike.
"I thought I told you to leave this open." Willow said as she looked around the room. I shrugged and looked at Spike.
"I guess it's just force of habit." Willow gave us one more look over.
"Well good night Dawn." With that Willow left to join Tara once more. Spike pushed the door fully shut again before turning back to me.
"Let's have a look at it then." I showed him my blood dripping finger once more. Spike sighed and then clenched his jaw. "Bandaid?" I looked at the door.
"Living room."
"Bloody hell." Spike knelt down in front of me and took my wrist gently this time. "Well love, may I?" I looked at him wide-eyed and open mouthed.
"Drink from me?" Spike looked at my finger.
"It's been months since I tasted fresh blood and well it's only a little love." I tilted my head to the side and then sighed. I thought about how it felt when his tongue grazed my skin and then my mind was made.
"Fine, but…just a little." Spike put on his bad boy grin and closed his mouth over my finger. I closed my eyes as Spike began to drink from the weeping cut on my finger. It felt so weird to be allowing him my blood, but the good kind of weird. I hated the taste of blood anyways and it was either me or him so I chose him. The inside of his mouth was warm and it seemed all too sexual as his tongue made small strokes across the cut. A low growl rumbled in the back of his throat. I gasped as Spike's face morphed, his forehead becoming wrinkled, his fangs grew, and his eyes turned a deep yellow. "Spike stop." I demanded becoming frightened. Spike, hearing the desperation in my voice released my finger and let his face revert. "What the hell were you thinking?" I snapped. Spike looked at me for a second and then he leaned up, kissing me. For a second I was too stunned to move. His kiss was hard and experienced. After recovering I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. Spike's body moved closer to mine, his shoulders pushing my legs apart from his position on the floor. I moaned softly into the kiss as Spike's left hand slid slowly up my thighs, making the touch so rough I could feel it through my jeans. Spike smirked and then slowly broke the kiss, pulling my bottom lip in his teeth.
"So this is why you made me stay Pet." Spike's hands moved my shirt up to the bottom of my pink bra to expose my stomach. At that moment I wished I had worn higher rising pants. These jeans dipped down past my hip bone and almost exposed my underwear. Spike guided me into a laying position and sat higher up on his knees. His tongue travel from the top of my pants, slowly, to the base of my bra. I whimper of pleasure escaped my lips as Spike let his tongue slid back down my stomach to my pants. I'd never been so…aroused before. I mean sure I felt small urges of pleasure but this was different. This wasn't the that kiss was so nice so now I have goose bumps kind or the shudder that had coursed through me when Spike licked me kind; this was moist between the thighs, stomach clenching, breath hitching, and heart racing kind of pleasure. Spike slowly undid the pants with his teeth, unzipping them as well. I gasped when his tongue grazed the newly exposed place on my body.
"S-spike." My shaky voice startled me. Spike grabbed my wrist and pulled me into a seated position. My cheeks burned a bright red when I looked at him.
"Yes Kitten." His lips trailed up my stomach and then moved to my neck seductively.
"I didn't ask you here for sex exactly." I said, really embarrassed by this fact, though now I was seriously considering it. Spike pulled away from me and locked gazes with me.
"What exactly do you want then Nibblet?" He asked as he let his fingers play amongst my body.
"I want to forget, but not give up." Spike smirked and kissed my neck again, nibbling on my ear lobe before answering.
"Under other circumstances I would reject this, but seeing as how I want to forget as well I'm inclined to say yes." I gasped and had trouble concentrating as he began small strokes across the lower region of my stomach. "I'll make you moan but not quite scream." He smirked. I looked at him a moment and then he stood up. "This may fair better if you were in that skimpy little gown of yours." I looked at him offended.
"It is not skimpy."
"And no underwear of course." I glared at him but I didn't really care for his plans. I just wanted to forget even for a brief moment. I stood up and moved past him so I could get to my dresser. I pulled my shirt off, figuring as long as I had a bra on and my back to him nothing was wrong. I pulled the little green nightgown on over my pants and then sighed. I reached up the front of the gown and removed my pants and underwear in one motion. I felt naked and exposed as the cool draft brushed against freshly awakened places. I turned to face my bed and Spike was sitting there, leaned back against the headboard. A smirk was place boldly on his face. I walked over to the door and quietly turned the lock. It wouldn't have kept Buffy out but it would Willow and Tara. I crawled onto the bed and looked at him. Spike rolled his eyes and pulled me onto his lap so that I was straddling him. His fingers inched up my inner thighs before reaching their destination. Spike's next action, though it was done gently it still hurt like hell. He forced two fingers inside me and closed his mouth over mine to muffle the pained moan that almost escaped. I clutched each side of his duster and after a moment it began to feel really good. My eyes closed dreamily and my mouth opened to his kiss as he thrust his tongue into my mouth. Tension began to build in my body as his touch became rougher, more damaging. His fingers parted inside of me and then closed as his lips trailed to explore other places. He did this a few times before forcing his fingers further into me. When he pulled his fingers back he did so slowly and then he forced them back in, this time hitting the spot that sent red hot chills up my spine.
"Spike…" I moaned softly. Spike smirked and pulled his fingers out of me so he could lick them. Something about this notion made me even hotter.
"I could make you cry in pleasure." He smirked. I looked at him and he pressed me down on him, his black jeans filling rough against my bare skin.
"How?" The word was a soft sigh. Spike's tongue licked the base of my neck as he thrust up against me. "Oh…" I gasped in understanding.
"Come on love. It'll help us forget." I was only slightly hesitant with my response. I ran my hand down Spike's chest and then kissed him heatedly. I was only fifteen but lots of girls my age were having sex. Spike smirked, pulled the night gown off my body, leaving me in just a bra. I took Spike's duster and shirt off before Spike grabbed my waist and pinned me against the bed. He took his pants off eagerly and forced our bodies under the blankets. "Don't want Red seeing anything." I ignored his idiotic talk and slid my hands into his bleached hair. Spike smirked and slid slowly into me so that I would feel pain but also pleasure. I moaned and instantly my eyes watered. He was hurting me in the best way possible. I spread my legs further apart and let my hands rest on his broad back.
"Oooh…" I gasped as he pulled back just as slow. Spike nipped my ear again and let his hot breath tickle my ear.
"You like that Nibblet?" He slammed into me hard. I bit my bottom lip to stop me from screaming and settled for a muffled sound that was close to a quiet scream. "Oh yeah." Spike smirked and pulled back slow once more.
"Oooh…" I moaned and arched my back slightly, not enough for it to actually leave the bed. "Oooh…oooh…" I moaned as he slammed into me, this time going deeper. I raked my nails down his back and he shuddered.
"Harder Dawnie." He moaned as he pulled away from me. He was going slow which made me feel like I was on the verge of losing control.
"Oooh…" I gasped. "Oooh… yes, again…" I raked my nails down his back again, this time scratching the skin.
"Oh Dawn, say it." He moaned as his pace quickened though it was still pleasantly slow. I closed my eyes and tilted my head back as he began to ravage my neck with hard kisses. He thrust deeper into me.
"Oooh Spike!" I moaned and dug my nails into him. He growled and moved harder. I gasped and tears began to stream down my face. It hurt so bad but it felt so good. "Spike…" It was less of a moan this time.
"I know." He growled as he bit my neck, not breaking the skin. I gasped and slid one hand into his hair while the other continued to clutch his back. He thrust into me once more.
"Spike…Spike…Spike…" His name was all I could think, all I could breath, and all I could say. "Oh…oh…oh…oh!" I was getting close to my breaking point. I was lasting longer than I thought I could. Spike was moaning but not actually saying anything. My legs touched the bed as he forced his way deeper causing me to scream. "Spike! Oh…yes!" Spike pulled back slow and slammed into to me. I couldn't handle it anymore. My back arched and I dug my nails deep into Spike's flesh as my first ever orgasm claimed my body. "Spike!" I screamed. "Oh yes…oh…yes!" With one last buck Spike reached his breaking point as well.
"Dawn! Dawn! Oh god Dawn." He exploded inside me. We held each other until we were completely exhausted from this activity. Spike pulled out of me and nuzzled my neck. His departure was the most painful part. We were both panting and sweaty. Spike rolled off of me but sat up. I looked up at him and blushed. He tenderly wiped the tears from my cheeks. "Should have been a little nicer to you I suppose." I leaned up and kissed him. Spike fell back to the bed and pulled me into his arms.
"Thank you." I said. Spike ran his hand down the curve of my back.
"You shouldn't thank me. I didn't do it for you Love." I rested my head on his chest and sighed at the silent heartbeat I imagined he had.