A/N: With all of the worry and the outpouring of angsty stories that the new trailer has caused, I really wanted to write something fluffy. Then I saw the new "Mamma Mia" movie, and there is a song/scene at the end that was very touching: "My Love, My Life." When I remembered that, in that death potion scene the first memory to appear is of Tina's mother, the inspiration came to me. I hope you enjoy it, and please listen to the song from the movie while you do.
In The Mirror Of Your Eyes
The tranquility of the Dorset coast was broken momentarily by the appearance of Tina Scamander under a willow tree. She landed squarely on her feet; apparating was almost second-nature to her now. She peaked through the long, slim, willow branches before exiting the shade and cover of the magnificent tree. It was the perfect apparition point in her mind for two reasons: it provided cover from any muggles (living in England and with Newt for some years had pounded that word into her brain and tongue) that might be nearby, and it was only a quarter of a mile from her cottage.
Though Tina often disapparated inside her home, she never apparated into it for safety reasons. She could never be certain that she wouldn't apparate on top of her husband or daughter, after all. Besides, she liked the little walk back to the cottage, especially if she were returning from work. She liked taking that time to put whatever work, job, raid or pursuit she'd been on behind her, at least for long enough until she and Newt were alone and together and she felt ready to talk about it.
Perfect summer evenings like this went a long way in helping Tina do that: to go from Tina, the hardened and experienced auror, to Tina, the wife and mother. The sky held few clouds in the sky, and the setting sun in the west was draping the landscape around her in such lovely colors. The sound and smell of the sea just out of sight was the perfect finishing touch.
As Tina followed the bend in the dirt road leading to her cottage, a little flash of bright color near the ground caught her eye. She slowed her steps and stopped when she came to the source. In the grass by the road, a little cluster of small wildflowers was growing. Squatting down, Tina saw that they were small pansies, white and violet. Smiling to herself, she picked a little bunch of them before standing again and continuing her walk home.
As she delicately touched the petals with her finger, her mind travelled back to a time, a memory, when she was only a bit older than her daughter…
Walking was still an adventure to her, each step a little bit wobbly. Daddy would smile as he watched her walk, and call her his 'little foal.' She was even more wobbly outside, on the ground that was more uneven than interior floors. But Tina would not be swayed right now: she had a present for her Momma.
Momma was sitting on a bench in Central Park that faced the meadow in which Tina had been playing. She was holding a book in one hand, and her other hand rested on her enlarged belly. Momma had told her that she would be a big sister soon.
When she was a few feet away, her Momma turned her head from the book she had been reading to look at Tina. Her face lit up in a radiant smile, her dark eyes mirroring the happiness in her daughter's, and she put the book into her handbag. Tina, smiling back, held out her present to her.
Momma's smile widened, if that were possible, as she took the little bouquet of pansies and daisies that Tina had picked for her. "Oh, pumpkin, they're lovely!" She then patted the space on the bench beside her. "Hop up here with me."
Tina, with some assistance from her mother, climbed up onto the bench until she sat right by her mother. She was still very young and small, so much so that her little feet barely dangled off the edge of the bench.
Momma was sniffing the wildflowers, still smiling as she looked at Tina. "I think these flowers would look much prettier if we wore them." She held out the bouquet to Tina. "Which one do you like best?"
Tina picked a violet pansy for its color. Momma plucked it out of the bouquet and gently slipped the stem behind Tina's little ear.
"Now, please pick one for me," said Momma.
Wanting them to be alike, Tina picked another pansy. Momma handed it to her and bent her head to the level of Tina's. Her daughter, copying her mother's previous actions, somewhat clumsily put the pansy behind her Momma's ear. In response, Momma kissed her cheek and said, "Thank you, pumpkin," before wrapping an arm around Tina so that she could snuggle against her Momma's side…
Tina was brought back to the present by a gentle breeze grazing her face. It made her aware of the tear that had slipped out, and she wiped it away. Taking a deep breath, Tina carefully slipped the flowers into her large trouser pocket before continuing her walk.
Minutes later, her home came into view. As she started up the front path towards the door, a sound caught her ear and stopped her. The sound (or rather, sounds) that she heard made her smile. She turned and quickly walked around the cottage. When she could see the expanse of lawn behind the cottage, she paused in the shadow of it so that she could watch the beautiful scene that she'd been hoping to find.
Phoebe Ruth Scamander, who had recently turned two years old, was giggling without restraint as she ran around in circles on the grass; she was running because her playmate was pursuing her. Her playmate was her father, and he was on his hands and knees as he chased her. Based on his body movements and the sounds that he was making, Tina ventured to guess that he was pretending to be an erumpent.
Of course, Tina could hardly watch this and remain silent for very long. When the giggles could no longer be contained, she let them out as she stepped into the sunlight.
This caught the attention of the two playing on the lawn. Phoebe's cherubic face lit up into a smile, and she ran towards Tina while she cried joyously, "Momma!"
Though she felt as though she could float off the ground from happiness, Tina crouched down and opened her arms wide for her daughter. She caught the two-year-old, lifted her up, and spun her around until they were both laughing. When Tina stopped and steadied herself, she settled her daughter on her hip and hugged her. "Hi, peanut!" she said, kissing Phoebe's rosy cheek.
Phoebe, who loved to imitate actions, pressed her mouth to her mother's cheek sloppily but sincerely. Tina giggled and smoothed back the tawny curls from Phoebe's forehead.
Looking over Phoebe's shoulder, she saw Newt getting up from the ground and dusting off his trousers, a red tinge to his face. Grinning, Tina pointed to him and asked her daughter, "Was Dada being silly?"
"Dada Pumpet!" replied Phoebe, still smiling like the sun.
Tina threw her head back and laughed upon hearing Phoebe's two-year-old interpretation of 'erumpent.' Newt laughed heartily, too, as he approached his girls.
A wicked gleam coming into her eyes, Tina stage-whispered to Phoebe, "And you know something, peanut? Dada can dance just like a Pumpet, too!"
Newt's face turned redder, and his hand pinched Tina's waist playfully as his arm wrapped around her middle. Tina shrieked, Phoebe clapped, and Newt laughed.
Remembering what she carried in her trouser pocket, Tina said, "I brought you a present." With her free hand, Tina pulled out the violet pansies from her pocket and held them up for Phoebe to see. The two-year-old looked at them in fascination, and she giggled when her Momma tickled her nose with them. "Will you pick one?"
Phoebe touched one of the blossoms with her little hand, and Tina smiled. She handed the bouquet to Newt so that she could pull out the flower that Phoebe had picked out. Then, she gently placed it behind Phoebe's ear. "Now you're even prettier, peanut," she murmured, giving Phoebe an eskimo kiss.
She pulled away when she felt familiar fingers brushing her hair behind her ear, as well as putting something else there too – a pansy. Newt smiled at the result.
Phoebe broke the silence by saying, "Momma pwetty!" Her dark eyes – inherited from both her mother and grandmother – sparkled in the sunlight.
Tina blushed and tried to duck her head, but Newt wouldn't let her by lifting her chin with his fingers. "What a highly intelligent daughter we have," he murmured before gently kissing Tina's forehead.
Too overwhelmed to say anything, Tina motioned with her head for all of them to go inside. Newt had his arm around her waist and Phoebe had her face pressed to Tina's neck as they did so.
That night, while Newt was putting their daughter to bed, Tina sat at the desk in the corner of their bedroom. She always liked to finish any paperwork related to any field work she had done that day before the day was over. She knew from experience how quickly it would pile up otherwise.
When the bedroom door opened, she looked up to see Newt enter. "Is she asleep?" she asked.
Newt nodded, shutting the door and beginning to unbutton his shirt. Tina turned back to her task, giving it her full concentration. When she'd finished and filed everything away, she joined her husband in bed, having already changed into her nightgown. Newt, in his pajamas, had an odd and wistful smile on his face.
After settling against the headboard next to him, Tina reached out a hand to touch his cheek. "Penny for your thoughts, Mr. Scamander?"
Newt leaned into her touch, and gazed at her for a moment before answering with a question of his own: "When did our baby become a little girl?"
Tina smiled and shook her head. "I don't know, love. She's not all the way there yet, though."
"No," Newt agreed, a twinkle coming to his eye. "She can't pronounce the names of most magical creatures correctly yet."
Tina laughed and nodded. "You know you'll miss it when she does, though. Whenever I hear an augurey cry, I'll always think of Phoebe saying, 'A-goo-gi.'"
Newt laughed, too, but then his expression became both serious and hopeful. "Tina…"
Tina scooched closer to him, and his arm settled around her shoulders.
He continued, peeking up at her from under his fringe. "We spoke once or twice, before Phoebe was born, about having more than one child…what are your thoughts on that now?"
Tina thought about it for a moment, resting her head on Newt's shoulder. When she answered, she spoke in a low but clear voice: "I sincerely hope that we can have at least one more child, Newt. I always wanted more than one; having a sibling is one that I'll always be grateful for, and I want Phoebe to have that experience, too." She made eye contact with Newt. "But…if it's okay with you, Newt, could we wait another year or two before we try again? I want to wait until Phoebe is a bit older, until she is truly a little girl rather than a baby. Is that alright with you?"
Newt kissed her forehead before he responded. "Of course, love. Whatever you wish. After all, though this child would belong to both of us, it is you who would have to do the hard work in preparation for it."
Tina snuggled closer to him, feeling (as she felt every single day) blessed that she had such a good man as her husband.
The next morning, Tina woke up as the sun began to rise. She usually didn't when she didn't have to go into work in the morning (today she only had to turn in her paperwork in the afternoon). But something made her wake up that morning. Newt remained deeply asleep, his arm slung over her waist (as was his custom). When she could no longer control her bladder, Tina carefully slipped out of bed after planting the lightest of kisses to her husband's brow. She tied on her robe and tiptoed out of the bedroom.
After relieving herself and washing up, Tina walked, not back into her's and Newt's room, but to Phoebe's room next to it. She silently opened the door and peeked in. What she saw made her smile.
Two-year-old Phoebe was not only awake, but standing up in her crib. She was gripping the sides and looking out the window, shifting one foot to another. She was getting antsy, Tina could see, and soon she would start to loudly demand their attention. Wanting her husband to have a lie-in, Tina decided to stop that course of action.
She opened the door all the way and shut it behind her before saying, "Good morning, peanut."
Phoebe turned her head and saw her mother. She smiled and began to bounce up and down. "Momma! Momma!"
Tina hurried over to her and lifted her up. Phoebe gladly returned the hug her mother gave her. Tina then looked at Phoebe with a glint in her dark eyes. "Want to have a little adventure with me?"
Phoebe's own dark eyes sparkled in response.
After wrapping Phoebe in a warm blanket, Tina made a shushing motion to her daughter. Phoebe imitated it, and obediently kept quiet as Tina silently carried her through and out of the cottage through the back door. As Tina expected, the air outside was chilly as the sun rose. But the delights for the eye made it more than worth it. The rising sun caused the silver mist covering the expanse of fields before them to turn golden. Larks added their musical notes to the atmosphere.
Tina took in a deep breath before speaking softly to her daughter, who was playing with the tasseled ends of the blanket that she was wrapped in.
"I love the fresh air here. It's so crisp and sharp, with the saltiness of the sea giving it the perfect touch…You know, peanut, your grandparents dreamed of raising their family in the country. Not in England, of course, but out of the Big Apple. Upstate New York, or a rural part of New England. We took a family holiday to Maine the summer that I turned six…it was lovely. But since your grandpa was an auror, he needed to be on the spot in the city. And in America, the cities are safer for us to hide…easier to blend in, less room for us to stand out, you know.
"When your daddy showed me this cottage for the first time, I was so happy, peanut. I've grown to love London, and I still miss New York from time to time, but from the first moment I was here, I knew that there was no better place for us to have our family."
Phoebe, lulled by her mother's rich and soft voice, snuggled against Tina's breast as her eyelids began to droop. Tina, smiling softly, pressed her lips to Phoebe's head full of tawny curls. "You know something, Phoebe Ruth Scamander? Whether you're a little girl, a big girl, a young woman or a wife and mother in your own right…you'll always be our baby."
Phoebe soon nodded off to sleep, warm and safe. Tina looked out across the fields, the morning mists almost gone in the light of the risen sun. Close by, she saw little speckles of violet in the sunlight…more little pansies. She smiled, and thought a thought that she hoped (as she always hoped) her mother could hear:
You would be so proud of her, Momma…and I hope you can be proud of me, too.
A few moments later, a sea breeze grazed Tina's left cheek. She closed her eyes against the tears that formed, and her heart warmed with relief.
Looking down at her sleeping daughter, Tina kissed her head one more time before standing up. Picking Phoebe up, Tina winced a bit at how Phoebe no longer weighed as much as a baby. Well, she would savor carrying her while she could. When she turned back to the cottage, she spotted Newt, in his own robe, standing at the open back door. He was smiling, waiting for his girls.
Tina returned his smile and walked to her husband. When she stopped in front of him, her breath caught in her throat. The way he looked at her, so much love in his eyes…she hoped that she would never take this for granted. Her mind went briefly back to the year they met, and the first time that they had parted at the New York docks. His gaze then had been awkwardly affectionate. Since then, each time he'd look at her, the love in his eyes had only grown.
The course of their love hadn't always run smoothly, especially in the first few years, but that had only made their love stronger now.
When Newt cupped her face and kissed her lips, Tina happily returned it tenderly. Newt then smiled down at their daughter and kissed her head. As he led her inside, Tina smiled at the aroma that filled her nose: Newt was making waffles for breakfast.