Breathe by Meowser_Clancy
A/N: I feel like most girls grow up with the (wrong) idea that it's sexy when guys just take things they want. Like stealing a kiss etc. A huge breaking point for me was when I realized that it's much sexier for a guy to ask. To make sure it's okay. To make sure they aren't crossing a line that's there for a reason
TL:DR...I've known this one guy for two years now and he's never made a move on me, and has always treated me with so much respect and just friendship and love, and now he's all I can think about lol. That's kind of why the #madney relationship means so much to me, because seeing Maddie, who thinks herself so broken, find love again, with Chimney, who is the most patient, respectful, sweetest man…like this the story I want to see on TV because this is the story I want to happen in my own life. It means so much that 911 is portraying such a relationship too, and portraying it the RIGHT way. This is the story we need right now, this is the storyline I didn't know that I needed, in this post #metoo universe.
This isn't related to Out of Reach. I'm trying to keep that story within the realm of canon, and while this story isn't uncanon, it's also jumping ahead.
They had begun the evening sitting at opposite ends of the couch, settled in to watch one of Maddie's favorite movies, Sense and Sensibility, but by the time the credits started, Maddie was curled into his side, legs tucked underneath her.
"I have to admit," Chimney said. "It wasn't boring."
"Hey!" She protested. "You should have trusted my taste from the beginning. I took your word for it on Mission: Impossible."
"You also fell asleep halfway through," he joked, stretching his arm with a yawn, and his hand landed on her shoulder.
He'd done the move.
He'd done the move, and Maddie didn't even mind.
She found herself snuggling closer, resting her face on his shoulder.
"I liked Colonel Brandon," he admitted, after a quiet moment. "He was a gentleman."
"A lot of people say that Sense and Sensibility is one of Austen's weaker stories, but I love it," Maddie agreed sleepily. "Two sisters, so very different, each on their own journey. Growing up, I couldn't believe that Marianne didn't end up with Willoughby, and thought that Brandon was so boring." She looked at Chimney. "I don't think that anymore."
"Willoughby kind of reminded me of my ex," Chimney admitted. "Obviously male, though." He laughed, but there was no amusement.
"How so?" Maddie wondered.
He hesitated. "Well. At first I...loved her. She was beautiful, she was exciting, she was sexy..."
Maddie looked down at her hands, wondering if she could handle this after all.
"And then I realized she wasn't interested in me, not the way she should be," he continued, speaking slowly. "She liked me because I was a firefighter, and I quickly realized that that was the only reason. And at first, I was dumb enough to think if I made myself exciting, if I talked myself up, if I said this, did that...she'd love me for who I was. But then I realized even if she did fall for me, she wasn't falling for the real me. She was falling for the me I'd created."
Silence fell. She could feel that Chimney felt as though he'd over shared, and was now overthinking it.
"Chim," she whispered, glancing up at him, straightening a little so she could face him. "Colonel Brandon kind of reminds me of you. Maybe on the surface he's not the obvious choice, but if you look closer..." She licked her lips. "He's the one you'd want all along. Kind and honorable, and sexy..."
"Oh, god, Maddie," he breathed, his hand landing on her jaw, thumb caressing her face.
She moved even closer and his lips closed the distance, touching hers in a feather light caress, barely touching, then deepening to one short, beautiful kiss.
He pulled away, smiling at her, a little nervous, a bit shy; again, she could tell he was overthinking, reconsidering, wondering if he'd made the right move.
But not regretting. Just hesitating.
She didn't want him to hesitate. Not with her. She wasn't his ex. And she was definitely interested in him as he was, right here, right now.
"Chim," she said again, and moved, climbing onto his lap, straddling him in a move that made his eyes open wide, and his hands land slowly on her waist. She cupped his face in hers, framing it with her small hands, and slowly leaned to kiss him, their lips again brushing oh-so-slowly, oh-so-gently, before she pulled back.
"Maddie, do you trust me?" He wondered.
"More than I thought I'd ever trust another human being again," she replied.
"I want to kiss you," he clarified. "And maybe more. I need to know that you're okay with that."
"I am more than okay with that," she emphasized.
"If you aren't sure about anything, if you just need a minute, let me know," he urged. "Just say the word-"
She kissed him, and that stopped all words for a moment, before she pulled back. "I'll let you know," she said, eyes shining.
And then they kissed again. Her lips met his with passion, and he responded in kind.
She hadn't felt like this in a long time, hadn't let herself, hadn't let this level of emotion even exist for so long now.
She hadn't realized she could feel like this again. She had real desire, flat out lust, coursing through her right now, driving her to move her lips from his, kiss down his neck, find the buttons on his shirt, start to unbutton the top one.
His hands landed over hers. He was panting, his eyes were closed, and it seemed to take effort to open them.
"Maddie," he gasped. "Not yet. We aren't ready for that."
Maddie could easily divide her life into before and after, and she knew quite keenly that the before Maddie would have been shocked, embarrassed, even angry to be told no in such a moment.
The Maddie she was now...sank back, hands moving to cover his, squeeze them tightly.
"Chim, I think I love you," she breathed. Her eyes were filling with tears, and she was literally overcome with the depth of feeling swelling in her heart.
She loved him. She loved him for a thousand reasons, and this was only one, but this was also a big one.
He gazed up at her, brown eyes smiling, and his hands squeezed hers back. "Mads, you completed my life in ways I didn't know it had to be completed," he said fervently. "I didn't even know how much I was missing in other relationships. I thought that was just it."
She ducked her head, pressing it to his shoulder, shaking a little from the tears. She wasn't sure why she was crying. She wasn't sure why the tears were so strong either, but she let herself cry, and Chimney wrapped his arms around her, holding tight.
"Mads, I love you too," he whispered, lips near her ear. "So much."
Her heart swelled, and she pulled back enough to smile at him through her tears.
And then they were quiet, and Maddie slowly returned to normal breathing, sobs slowing, tears drying. "I'm not sure where that came from," she admitted, wiping her eyes.
"I don't care where it came from," he smiled. "It needed to be let out."
And he was right, she realized, curling back into his arms, sliding back onto the couch and off of his lap. She'd been keeping in her real emotions for so long, making a brave front, trying to keep calm and carry on.
And now she finally felt safe enough to let them out, to let them show.
God, she loved him. That was something she couldn't imagine changing.