Pocahontas and John Smith
JPOV
The darkness began to fade, I could hear whispers. Though I was now awake, I couldn't move much, it was too painful. I heard footsteps and sensed someone sit down beside me.
"I'm so sorry" the voice whispered.
"It's…not your…fault." I mumbled though I had no idea who it was.
I guess they didn't think I would respond because whoever it was, they gasped and said "John!?" in a half whisper. Then I was given an awkward side hug and through the pain realized it was Pocahontas who sat with me. "I can't believe it! You're awake!" she exclaimed.
"Mmhmmm……," was the only sound I managed to make as I tried to resist screaming out in pain.
"Oh! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, about everything."
"It's not you fault," I repeated. "I've had worse, can't think of anything right now but..."
"Why do you keep saying that?" she asked "You haven't and yes, it is my fault. If we'd never met none of this would have happened."
I wanted to look her in the eyes, but she looked down. "Pocahontas," I said. "I would rather have died yesterday, than live a hundred years without knowing you." I reached out, ignored the pain, and lifted her chin. She had a single tear running down her cheek. I wiped it away with my thumb, and then pulled her head closer. "I love you," I whispered, and kissed her. She responded, but was very careful. She didn't know where to place her hands, for a fear that she would hurt me. I pulled away and said so softly you could barely hear it, "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. The pain is worth it just to be with you." With that she kissed me again, more passionately and fearless than if she hadn't seen me for an eternity. It hurt, a lot, but I ignored it. I didn't want to upset her and I defiantly didn't want her to stop.
Just then the tent flap opened and her father, the chief, walked in. He cleared his throat to announce his presence and out of respect I broke it off. "Thank you, John Smith, for saving my life by risking yours. I will always be in your debt." He laid his robe across my bare chest and I was stunned at how soft and warm it was. I don't know why but I had always imagined raccoon skin as uncomfortable.
He then turned to Pocahontas and said, "Come, we should go, he needs his rest. We don't need this added stress to diminish his already small chance at life."
"But…," was all she could get in.
"Your father's right, Pocahontas," I told her. "You don't need to waste you time here. I'm sure you have more important matters to deal with."
"But I want to stay," she insisted. "I need to." I gazed into her eyes and it was like I could see into her soul. So many emotions, so much pain, longing, the fear of not knowing, mixed with hope , and guilt, and a million others. We stayed like that, just looking at each other, for a long moment before her father cleared his throat again. We had forgotten he was there and each of us immediately switched our focus in opposite directions.
Chief Powhatan said no more, he didn't argue, he just slipped out the door.
Now that we were alone again there were a million things I wanted to say, and even more I needed to ask. "What happened to Ratcliffe?" All I could think about, that is when I wasn't thinking about Pocahontas, was how unimaginably cruel General Ratcliffe was and how I hoped the king gave him exactly what he deserved, a quick trip to the gallows.
She took her time answering, which drove me nuts, until finally she said, "well, after he shot you, your men had an uproar. We proposed peace and he clearly stated his opinion by trying to shoot my father. Your men couldn't believe it. They all turned on him and right now I believe he is sitting in the brig of your ship, bound and gagged with iron chains. The only reason he's not back in England awaiting punishment is because they were waiting for you before they took off.
"What?" I asked. Did I just hear her right? Did she say I was going back?
"You're going back, John. It's your only chance."
"No, I want to stay here, with you."
"We both know that's not an option. You'll die if you stay here." Her eyes got very wet all of a sudden and I guessed it was because the last thing she said.
"Then come with me." I begged
"I can't," she said and by now tears we silently streaming down her face.
"Then I'm staying here. I'm staying with you."
She was quiet for a while, a long while, but after careful thought she mumbled "fine, I'll go with you." And then got up and walked out. I'm not sure what made her change her mind, but I didn't worry about that too much. She must have had her reasons and eventually I'll know them but not now. Now was time to sleep, I hadn't felt it before but I was completely exhausted. I closed my eyes and saw her face, I smiled and drifted back into the darkness and let it engulf me once more.
***
