This is a one shot && I thought about adding on to it, however, I am unsure if I should; because I do not know where I would go with the story. So if you want me to continue, just let me know, and I will see what I can do.

Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy, because if I did my life would be complete because it would consist of Eric Dane and Patrick Dempsey and me. Although, I do love Ellen Pompeo.

Please Read && Review.

The sky is dark, as it is 11:01pm. Meredith looks around her, and notices the brush of wind blowing across her cheek, and the lightening flashing in the south. A new storm is just blowing in. Why does it always have to rain? Why is she still living in Seattle? Why is she asking herself these questions? She already knows the answers. She loves the rain. She has memories in Seattle that she can't, and will not, erase. Meredith grabs her hair as it whips her face, and she puts it in a pony tail, in the back of her head. This only helped slightly, as some tiny pieces kept falling across her face. She tried to hold them back. As Meredith looked around her surroundings, she thought about how the last week had been. The last week had been hectic, confusing, and too much for her. While her mind raced, she began to think of how the week had started, and that had started with Derek.

"Goodmorning Mer." Derek said as he kissed her lips, softly.

"Watching me again Derek? Did my snoring wake you again?" Meredith chuckled, yet at the same time felt bad that she had snoring problems. Derek smiled at her and shook his head. "No."

"Then why are you watching me?" She looked at him, raising an eyebrow, and leaned up to kiss his tender lips, that she always longed to touch with her lips.

"Because I love you, and I love the way that your nose crinkles as you begin to shift out of your deep sleep." Derek mentions, nonchalantly. Meredith raises her hand up to her nose, and covers it, feeling slightly embarrassed. Derek laughed softly.

"You have a cute nose." He mentions.

"No I don't." Meredith contradicts.

"Yes you do. Take my word on it." Derek smiles, and kisses the hand that was on top of her nose. Then he removes her hand, and kisses her small, delicate nose.

Derek stands. "I have a surgery at ten, and its eight. So I'm going to take a shower. Care to join?" He shifts his eyebrows seductively, motioning with his finger to make her follow.

She shakes her head, and pulls the covers tighter around her body. He shakes his head at her, motioning again for her to follow. Once again, she shakes her head.

He walks away, and she feels slightly disappointed. As she turns on her side, she looks at the clock seeing as it was 8:01am. As she was about to yawn, she felt strong hands grab her by the waist and she laughed, as she was cradled like a baby by Derek's hands. She smiled at him, and he smiled back.

Derek took her in the bathroom, and set her down, removing her clothes, as he was already naked, and waiting for her to join.

"You have a cute butt." She laughs as he stands facing away from her, turning the shower on hot.

"No I don't." He contradicts with a grin on his face, that she can't see.

"Yes, you do have a cute butt." She nods.

"I know, just wanted to here you say it again." He smiles as he turns around, and picks her up, taking her in the shower with him.

Why couldn't Meredith go back to that? Everything seemed cheerful and delightful only five days ago. Five days ago, she was happy and in love. However, now she wasn't. She didn't think she could be. Five days ago, Cristina started to freak out about the wedding. Something that Meredith was surprised to see. Meredith thought back to Cristina.

"Meredith Elizabeth Grey!" Meredith turned at the voice, the voice was at a harsh whisper. She was surprised to see her person, in the hospital pretending to not be there. Meredith began to laugh loudly as she looked at her person. Her person was below the desk, and if someone was to come see her right now, they would get the wrong idea about them both. Meredith laugh began to slow down, as Cristina pulled on her leg, and made her fall to the ground with her. Meredith fell on her ass with a thump. Cristina smiled evilly, and Meredith was quite weary to be there with Cristina, at this moment and time.

"How did you know my middle name?" Meredith asked, not sure if she had told Cristina her middle name before. If so, she must have been drunk, because she doesn't give that name out, to anyone, especially the people she trusts most.

Cristina scoffed, rolling her eyes in the process. "I don't remember."

Meredith turned her head to the side, looking as if she was confused. "Okay fine. I found out by reading your chart. Are you happy, now?"

"Not really, but whatever." Meredith laughed. "Now for the good question, what are you doing here?" She said moving back against the cabinet giving her back some rest.

"Oh...um I don't know." Cristina sighed. "I'M A SURGEON!" Meredith was taken back a little by the statement, and looked around, seeing if some nurse or other nosy person was looking at them.

"Really, I hadn't noticed." Meredith sarcastically said.


"Okay seriously Mer. Remember last time I told you to keep the sarcastic remarks to me. Well you should listen to me. You can't be sarcastic." Cristina smiled to herself.

"Yeah, well…YES I can." Meredith said, not able to think of something else to say.

Cristina laughed softly. "Yeah sure, whatever you say Meredith Elizabeth."

Meredith was about to say something, when her pager started buzzing at her side. She looked at it and it was a 911 page from Dr. Sloan, who was her attending for the day.

"What do you want, Cristina? I have to answer this page."

"I want in on a surgery."

"When do you not want on a surgery?" Meredith interrogated.

"Um…that's a never." Cristina responded, as if Meredith had just asked the most stupid question.

Meredith stood up. "I will see what I can do." Meredith started to walk away, when she heard.

"This is why you are my person. Bye Dr. Meredith Elizabeth." Meredith cringed at the name, and turned around flipped Cristina off. Cristina only laughed.

"You didn't say anything about hand gestures." Meredith smiled, and walked to her patients' room."

Meredith laughed at this memory. She loved her person, in a sister way, and loved how she was so surgery hungry. Meredith wondered what she would be like when she was an attending. Meredith smiled, and then turned away from the railing. She looked on the top of the building. It was plain. Nothing unusual about it, yet it was her second favorite place to be in the hospital for herself. First, of course, being the O.R and third being the basement. The roof was her own special place. No one else knew about it, yet everyone knew about it. The only reason all other people, except Meredith, came up here was to help people off the helicopter. Yet, no one else that she knew of came up her just to think and look at the skyline. That was her favorite part of Seattle, the skyline. The skyline was beautiful and not clouded, like most other cities.

Meredith looked at her watch 11:07pm. She looked down to her feet, and let her hair fall down upon her face. The wind calming for a small amount of time..

As Meredith lifted her head, she thought about how the rest of the week had gone. She didn't want to remember these memories, because they meant she failed. She had failed the ones that she loved. Well her people, Derek and Cristina.

She hadn't made Derek happy enough.

"Should you be worried that I met a woman? No. Should you be worried that, for me, flirting with that woman was a highlight of my week?"

Had Meredith really been that miserable lately? She felt sincerely sorry for that. She hadn't meant for him to feel neglected or however someone wanted to put it. She just couldn't find the word that explained what he was probably going through. Meredith had been through hell that week: Susan dying, her father slapping her for "supposedly" killing her faux mother, Thatcher not letting her go to the funeral, and last but not least, having to take the test over again. Her friends helped her, but in a way Derek was feeling neglected that she had not come to him. Yet, she hadn't gone to her friends either. They came to her, knowing that she needed help. Although, Meredith wanted to blame this on Derek, she couldn't. This was no one's fault but her own.

Meredith hadn't been a good enough person.

"Meredith say something. Please say something."

Meredith had not been able to think of something to say to the bride-to-be. She wasn't sure, because her mind was racing. Racing with the things that Derek said, and the things about if this wedding didn't work out, then Derek and her couldn't work out. She now realized that, that was not the way things worked. She couldn't base her own feelings on the way something didn't turn out for someone else. If you loved someone well enough, then you two should be the only ones that mattered. Meredith felt like an idiot, finding that out now.

Meredith let out a tear. She had messed up, she had probably lost the one that she loved now. Derek had officially called her the "love of his life" but what did she do? She walked away, because she was running late for Cristina's wedding.

Meredith felt as her tears began to mix with the rain, as the rain began to fall harder now. Meredith looked down at her watch, feeling childish for doing this. However, she had promised a patient she would do this, because she had never done this before and it supposedly something that everyone was supposed to do. Meredith looked up at the clouds, letting the rain hit her forehead, and she closed her eyes.

It was 11:11pm.

"Okay I've never done this, but what I wish for is to be happy. I want my life to be happy again."

Meredith knew what she was feeling was probably not really happening, but she felt a rush of relief fall over her. Maybe she could be happy. All she had to do was believe.

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