the kiss echoes on my lips it's
just so unreal not to dwell too much
on things far too unimportant to ever play a role
it's just so intoxicating playing with something else
just this one time
a smile a gesture a brush of hands skin on skin
a spell a letter pitter-patter of the laughter breath in-between breath
maybe this one time
maybe it's the one
but I'm already getting bored, it's dull, oh so normal
getting all choked up?
spinning out of control
blessing and cursing your spine and blissful warmth
I don't really know what I need I feel more nowadays than realistically think
and it doesn't even hurt anymore, spinning spinning
spinning
I must do things, I need to run errands, kill the time, curse the moment I want to scream
but then there's you tea movies going on jokes whose points I can't grasp fully and the book
the blanket lonely starry nights and things I forgot to tell you the last time you were around
and the calls and the posters and the theater the tickets the snow the show I'm currently writing something on
and my tears and your sore throat and the way your lips quiver when I laugh out loud and the breath
poppies roses and biology
God, I want to scream out of frustration and tear my hair
it's impossible, there can't be anything just a void a solid ice and futile spells to bring me back
formulas, definitions, patterns of chemical reactions
and so hormones and neurotransmitters flood my mind
a dazed smile and kiss onto the frown