99ramenkage: R U there?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Yup.
99ramenkage: What R U doing?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Eating Twizzler's. woot!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Did you go to the soccer game last nite?
99ramenkage: Believe it! You totally went beast mode on Temari!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: I knows!
99ramenkage: It was frickin' epic! Even Gaara was impressed.
SUCHIHA13: You've done better.
99ramenkage: Sheesh, teme, UR such a downer. Stop bitching and take some happy meds. ^_^
PinkIsTheNewBlack: For serious! We're adjusting to the new team. We lost Tenten to Konoha Community College and all of the sophomores that made varsity are L-A-M-E.
SUCHIHA13: I don't think the sophomores are the ones to blame here. Did you see that pink-headed captain's goal kick? Going backwards?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: HOT DAMN―you're such a fudgeface Sasuke!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Thanks to Ino I've been reliving that embarssment all day, and now―when I finally have some peace and quiet away from her god-forsaken shrieking―you have to bring it up. Not. Cool.
SUCHIHA13: Whatever, just remember to kick the ball forward next game. Then you might not seem like a total moron and I won't be embarassed to know you.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: RUDE to the power of ten!
99ramenkage: Don't listen to him, Sakura, you were gangster! Unlike a certain someone, who never called me back last night and then had the balls to sit on the SUNA BLEACHERS!
99ramenkage: What's up with that man!? We were supposed to support Sakura together! U know how much of an idiot I looked like with SAK written on my chest and no URA beside me?!
SUCHIHA13: One would assume you looked the same as usual.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: ZOMG! That reminds me! .ke. Guess who I talked to last night?
SUCHIHA13: The voices in your head?
PinkIsTheNewBlack:You suck! AND NO!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: I'll give you a hint.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: He's tall.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Dark.
99ramenkage: Shino?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh Hell to the no! But he is ridiculously handsome, like, if he were next to me right now… well, there's no telling what I'd do…
SUCHIHA13: :C
PinkIsTheNewBlack: LOL! Look Naruto, Sasuke just messaged me a frowny face!
99ramenkage: I don't see it!
PinkIsTheNewBlack:Look at it sideways!
99ramenkage: lol It's an emo-ticon!
PinkIsTheNewBlack:LOL LOL LOL
99ramenkage: lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol
SUCHIHA13: You're both dim-wits, just get over it and tell me who it was.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Okay, okay, back to my mystery man. He's tall, dark, super smexy, and…
PinkIsTheNewBlack: …his name starts with an I!
99ramenkage: Iruka-sensei?!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Uchiha Itachi!
99ramenkage: NO WAY!
SUCHIHA13: The hell!? Why's Itachi messaging you?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh, he didn't just message me, buddy-boy, he called me. On da phone! And right before he hung up, I got him to text me a pic of him. I said I'd put it on as my photo thing for his number― DUDES―HE GAVE ME HIS CELL # !!!!!!
99ramenkage:I want Itachi's number!
SUCHIHA13: He sent you a photo to attach to his #? WTF?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Yup! But, like, I'm obviously not gonna stop there. Kurenai-sensei's been bugging me about my French grade… and me thinks a picture of Uchiha Itachi might be just the thing to bump up my semester average. The cell number, however, I shall save for another day and perhaps another class…
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh, Sasucakes, thank you for being my friend.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: But more importantly, thank your parents for me, for having your brother
PinkIsTheNewBlack: And by extension, thank your brother for being H.A.W.T. ~_^
SUCHIHA13: :C
PinkIsTheNewBlack: IT HAS RETURNED!
99ramenkage:Are U doing that right now, teme?
99ramenkage:I hope people are looking at U weird
SUCHIHA13: What could you two possibly have to talk about anyway?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Mostly you. Ya see, we are the both of us concerned about the well-being of your psyche what with all the AP classes you're taking this year, Mr. Future Accounting Major.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: He's going to "check up with me periodically" to make sure you're not going over the edge stress-wise. I'm supposed to alert him if you start painting your nails black, writing death poetry, wearing bucket hats - that sort of stuff.
SUCHIHA13: Bucket hats?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oui. Apparently, they are the universal symbol of giving up on life.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Basically, I'm an Angel, and Itachi's my Charlie. (Insert gun clicky noise thing here)
99ramenkage:That's right, unlock the safety!
SUCHIHA13: Are you effing kidding me?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh, and if Orochimaru starts pestering you again to take his chem class, I'm supposed to "notify" him. He said he could relate to you, because back when he was here all of 6 years ago, he had the same problem, and didn't have anybody to confide in when the workload was too much. He just wants you to know that if you feel like it's become too much to handle, you should talk to someone about how you're feeling
SUCHIHA13: So basically, you guys were discussing my mental stability?
SUCHIHA13: That's. Just. Effing. Fantastic.
99ramenkage:I have noticed Orochimaru sneaking glances at you… but he's probably not thinkin' 'bout chemistry, if ya knowz what I meanz *wink wink, nudge, nudge*
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Naruto! Are you perhaps insinuating that he was thinking about biology? *eyebrow raise*
99ramenkage: Biology, anatomy, other human studies…
PinkIsTheNewBlack: XD
SUCHIHA13:You're treading a fine line right now, dobe.
99ramenkage: What?! I'm just taking to Sakura about UR 'extracurriculars'.
SUCHIHA13:Uzumaki, you're going to get it after school, and I swear on the life of my unborn child, there will be blood.
99ramenkage:Going to get it? Sasuke, U dirty whore! I always knew U'd fall for me!
SUCHIHA13: Your future in two words ― CURB. STOMPED.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Hey now, let's just everybody calm down
99ramenkage: Are U trying to turn me on with gore? U kinky bastard.
SUCHIHA13:Say anything even remotely like that ever again and I am going to put a nail-gun to your head, shoot it down your spine, and watch the life spasm out of you.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Err, that's intensely violent and the kind of thing most people would report to the police. You guys should knock it off.
99ramenkage:Cover UR eyes Sakura, this is turning into a very adult conversation. Isn't that right, Sasuke-chan?
SUCHIHA13:You're going to be force-fed your own innards―starting with that walnut-sized brain.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: THAT'S IT. This has turned from amusingly perverted to just plain sick and I will not stand for it!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: From here on out, there will be no more questioning Sasuke's sexual preference, no more threatening Naruto's life, and definitely no more ignoring Sakura!!!!!!!!! CAPICHE?
SUCHIHA13: This is between me and the blond with the death wish. Stay out of it.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Itachi.
SUCHIHA13: What?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Itachi. I will call Itachi if this continues. Call and tell him that you've been having homicidal thoughts. Ya think he'd like that, my friend?
PinkIsTheNewBlack:Hmmm?
SUCHIHA13: You wouldn't dare.
PinkIsTheNewBlack:What? You don't think I want an excuse to talk to that Grade A piece o' man meat?
PinkIsTheNewBlack:Well?
SUCHIHA13: Fine.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Fine what?
SUCHIHA13:Fine, I'll stop. Just don't call Itachi.
99ramenkage:w.h.i.p.p.e.d.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: NO MORE SAID I!
99ramenkage: Ok, ok, I'm done
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Good. Now what were we talking about before we got off on this disturbing tangent?
99ramenkage:Sibling bonds?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh yeah. Sasuke, you can be sure to thank your brother for giving me the perfect finale to what was officially the best day ever in existence!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Tsunade accepted my internship, Karin got a skirt violation, we won the season game against Suna, and Uchiha Itachi called me to wish me goodnite
SUCHIHA13: What was that last part?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: FINE! He didn't really, but I was just about to go to bed, so he might as well have.
99ramenkage: Karin-bitch got another skirt violation?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: HELL YES! And this time I got to see when Anko-sensei made her put her arms to her side to check if it was fingertip length, and she was like lifting her shoulders up super high so it would look okay, but it was still at least three inches away! And a bunch of guys from the basketball team walked by as she was getting scolded and she had the epitome of a hush-mouth, oh dudes!
SUCHIHA13:I didn't understand any of that, nor was it funny.
SUCHIHA13:You fail.
PinkIsTheNewBlack:Your face fails!
SUCHIHA13: Wow. Your biting wit absolutely destroys me.
PinkIsTheNewBlack:Just keep listening jerk face!
SUCHIHA13:What is up with you and this sudden obsession with my face? That's like, the fourth allusion you've made to it since we started messaging.
SUCHIHA13:Are you secretly attracted to me or something?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Let's see, uh, NO. Unfortunately for you, Sasuke, I only like your face because it reminds me of Itachi, my soulmate and future baby-daddy.
99ramenkage:OH! Wham-bam, chicken dinner! You just got served, teme!
SUCHIHA13:You're both wrong in the head.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: A.N.Y.W.A.Y.S.―
PinkIsTheNewBlack: So Anko-sensei was all like "You know what men think of girls that wear skirts like this? That they're easy whores. Are you an easy whore? Or are you an intelligent woman? Blah blah blah" I kid you not. It was spectacular. I'm tearing up just thinkin' bout it.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Oh guys, it's great when things like that happen to skanks. Thinking they're all that and a bag of chips.
99ramenkage:Ho-ritos!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: LLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SUCHIHA13: You feel so self-righteous don't you?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: At this current moment in time, yes, I do, Sasuke, I really do.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: One second, Sai's coming over.
"Deidara-sensei, hag has her phone out. I'm not positive, but I'm fairly certain that it's against school policy to have your cell phone out during class."
"Shaddup! Go paint naked people, or whatever it is you do in your spare time."
"Haruno― put the phone away. You haven't drawn me your daily stick figure yet."
And then,
"What the f-!" Followed by a whispered, "It's gonna have to come out of the art budget…"
While Sai was distracted at the possibility of his beloved and already meager art funds being used to purchase illicit explosives from a maybe not so secure black market website, Sakura snatched his kneaded eraser and threw into the kiln room. She then turned back to her Blackberry.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Okay, Bob Ross has been taken care of.
SUCHIHA13: Why are you messaging during class, Sakura? You're the least discreet person in the world.
SUCHIHA13: You're gonna get us all in trouble
PinkIsTheNewBlack: OK, 1) I'm in art and Deidara-sensei is kinda preoccupied ordering Chinese firecrackers online, so, really not that big of a deal
SUCHIHA13: How'd he get past the administration's Firewall?
PinkIsTheNewBlack: IDK! He bribed Shikamaru in extra credit points or s/thing. Anywho― 2)Aren't you in Calc right now? Who are you to be lecturing moi?
SUCHIHA13: We have a sub today. She's making us do crossword puzzles, because―like dobe over here― she lacks any basic mathematical comprehension.
99ramenkage:Just cuz I'm repeating Algebra II doesn't make me stupid, Mr. Valedictorian! And crossword puzzles are the shiz!
SUCHIHA13: Forgive me, Class President-sama.
99ramenkage:Apology not accepted!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: I will interrupt only to mention that I am Salutatorian and to a lot of people that is also considered a great honor.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: So Yeah. Please continue.
SUCHIHA13: I intend too.
SUCHIHA13: You're at lunch right now, aren't you?
99ramenkage: Yeah
SUCHIHA13: Freshman lunch, because you're schedule got screwed over by your remedial math course?
99ramenkage: You can shove it, teme! It's not like I eat with them!
99ramenkage: But if I did eat cafeteria food, it would mean I'd be getting dibs on pizza before UR ugly face, so put that in a juice box and suck it!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Naruto, I can see you from the window. You're sitting on a bench next to a freshman. Right. Exactly. Now.
SUCHIHA13: Is he? Seriously?
99ramenkage: UR joking, U can't know that.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: I so can! It's the 9th grader that carries around the rolly-backpack all the juniors hitch rides on. The chubby one that idolizes Sasuke and smells like peanut butter.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Wow, look at that porker go! He's, like, inhaling the shepherd's pie. Slow down kiddo, no one's gonna steal it from ya!
SUCHIHA13: Dobe?
SUCHIHA13: She's right, isn't she?
SUCHIHA13: Oh, how the mighty have fallen. All the freshmen probably think you're some friendless idiot. Oh wait, that's exactly what you are.
99ramenkage:U know what, screw U, Sasuke!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Turn around Naruto, you can probably see me. Well, maybe only if you look around chubbers.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: I'm telling you, turn around.
PinkIsTheNewBlack:The other way, towards the foreign language department.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Alright, no, that's the football field.
SUCHIHA13: Imbecile.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: OK, walk two feet to the left of tubby and I'm waving, second floor.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: There you go. The hell? Is that one of those giant tubs of animal crackers?
99ramenkage:Damn straight it is!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Is that what you're eating for lunch? Animal crackers and Mountain Dew? You're so weird.
SUCHIHA13: This coming from the girl who brings gallon jugs of cranberry juice to school.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Lots of kick-ass people do that!
SUCHIHA13: No. KA people do not do that. Creepers do.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Listen here, UCHIHA, you keep bashing my cranberry juice and you and I are going to have a long chat about urinary track infections! Why they happen and how much they hurt!
SUCHIHA13: I look forward to it.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Cease with the douchebaggery―Please!
SUCHIHA13:Honest, I truly enjoy our discussions on the urinary system.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Punk―I'm serious! This chika's going into pre-med, these kinds of topics don't embarrass her!
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP: That's great Haruno. I'm sure Tsunade-sama appreciates that about you.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Kakashi-sensei?
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP: Yes. I'm going to ask that you deliver yourself to my office. We're going to have a long talk about respecting teachers during class by not using our phones. Uchiha, that means you too.
SUCHIHA13: What about the idiot?
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:I believe Naruto has an Honors PolySci class at KCC that he needs to hurry to. It has been difficult enough to work into his schedule, the least he can do is attend.
SUCHIHA13: Collegiate? Him?
99ramenkage:Believe it!
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Oh, and Haruno, bring your phone with you. I have some business with Tsunade-sama I believe can be resolved with that Itachi picture of yours.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: NOOO!!!!!
SUCHIHA13: My 50-something principal wants a photo of Itachi.
SUCHIHA13: I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
99ramenkage: What happened? Get caught with Ero-senin's porn collection again, Kakashi-sensei?
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Watch yourself, Naruto.
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP: And at least make an attempt at subtlety when asking a question like that. Seriously.
PinkIsTheNewBlack: Whoa whoa whoa! You're not debunking it?
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Not in the least!
PinkIsTheNewBlack: GAH!!!!!!!!! NASTINESS!
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Before we stray further off topic―Sasuke, are you doing alright?
SUCHIHA13: Excuse me?
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Your brother called the school yesterday; wanted me to make sure you were doing okay.
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:I'm supposed to let him know if I think you're burning yourself out with coursework. A great guy, that Itachi, really cares about you.
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:Uchiha?
SUCHIHA13: F my life.
HatakeKONOHAHIGHVP:LOL