Only a Hair Off
Summary: Lois is convinced that Superman works in plain clothes at the Daily Planet, and she is on the hunt to discover his secret identity with the help of her partner Clark Kent.
Time line: This takes place way before my other story Persistence of Vision, very early in their relationship. It's pre-Jason, pre-Richard.
I'm not abandoning Persistence of Vision, it's just been slightly delayed. I hope you enjoy this one-shot.
SSSSSSSSSSS
She wasn't hiding exactly, she was just making life simpler. She almost felt a moment of Zen as she lit up her cigarette. Peace. Tranquility. No one giving her unwanted advice.
Who exactly appointed the Surgeon General authority over her life anyway? If she had to breathe the toxic fumes coming from automobile exhaust she might as well pick her poison.
The view from the rooftop was spectacular. Lois could feel her foul mood fading. Her life was usually one of purpose, and smoking gave her a reason to escape up here. She had just about achieved that sense of peace she had been lacking since Perry had assigned her to be partners with Clark Kent.
Here, in her private domain, she could admit that Clark really wasn't so bad. Even though he was a bit rough around the edges, his intentions were always good. She was just accustomed to working alone.
A slamming door followed by a powerful gust of wind thrust her out of her precarious moment of peace. She looked down in disgust; her cigarette had gone out. She rose from her seated position behind a cement pillar to berate the person that had thoughtlessly disrupted her calm.
It didn't matter that there was no way anyone could know that she was up here. She was aching to give them a piece of her mind, but when she looked there was no one there.
Someone had come through the stairwell access door, but they were gone now. Lois searched the area, and caught sight of Superman disappearing over the horizon.
There was something fluttering in the wind that caught her eye. She thought it might be a tiny flag. Lois approached it curiously, ignoring her vertigo as she got close to the ledge.
She unsnagged the strip of cloth from the rough edge, to identify the item. It was a man's neck tie. How had this gotten way up here?
Was it possible? Her face blanched and her grip tightened convulsively on the cloth in her hand. She searched the sky, but there were only clouds. Her gaze shifted seemingly in slow motion to the tie in her hand seeing it in a new light.
Lois' greatest talent as a reporter was the ability to take a couple of seemingly unrelated clues and make connections. This happened now. The slamming door followed by the gust of wind, Superman disappearing in the sky, and now the discarded tie in a place where no one but she or Superman ever frequented.
They were all linked to Superman. Had he been the one to hurry out of the Daily Planet? The slamming door followed by the rush of wind that was synonymous with the superhero seemed to point in that direction.
What had he been doing at the Daily Planet? Superman had left in a hurry, moving so fast he hadn't noticed her. She had only gotten a glimpse of his departing figure in the sky. He had left a tie behind in his wake, presumably proof that he'd started the day in something not resembling his Superman attire.
Why would he wear a tie unless he was going about the city dressed as one of them? Wouldn't people notice? Lois tried to picture him standing straight and imposing in a suit and tie, the lock of dark hair curling against his brow, his blue eyes blazing.
She smiled, liking the image. But to what purpose did it serve? Clothes couldn't make that much of a difference in his appearance. She changed outfits every day and no one failed to recognize her.
Unless it was only part of a disguise. She knew that she hit on the truth the moment the thought came to her. A mask was too obvious. It would have to be something more subtle.
However he achieved it, Superman was someone who spent the day at the Daily Planet dressed as one of her colleagues. She felt her heart rate spike. Oh My God! Lois probably passed him in the halls and never even knew it. Maybe she even spoke to him on a daily basis and had been completely unaware. Surely, she would know, wouldn't she?
This had Pulitzer written all over it.
Lois leaned over the edge wondering if she'd see Superman return in a streak of red and blue, or if he'd walk calmly back to the building with everyone blissfully unaware of his true identity.
"Lois!" Clark's voice came out of no where.
She started in shock almost falling over the edge.
Clark grabbed her arm, steading her with a surprisingly strong grip.
"Clark!" she gasped in surprise.
"My god, Lois. You could have fallen to your death." he said nervously. "What were you doing?"
"I found this up here." She showed him the tie. "I was trying to see who it belonged to."
"Over the edge of the building?" Clark sounded alarmed. "You think someone jumped?"
"I hope not." Lois was reluctant to share her suspicions. Maybe because she was afraid that if she said the words aloud it would sound ridiculous. Maybe because she wanted to be the one to discover the truth. But he was her partner. After she worked out some of the details, she could use Clark's help.
"Do you know who this belongs to? I need to find out how this got up here." Lois asked.
Clark flushed, shifting uncomfortably. Lois held the tie in her hands up to Clark, and he back-peddled almost falling over the ledge in his hurry to avoid her.
"What's wrong with you?" She asked, but he shrugged avoiding her eyes.
He glanced down at his own tie looking a little embarrassed. She noticed that Clark was wearing a green tie that clashed horribly with the gray of his suit.
"I think that this tie would go better with your suit than that awful green one you're wearing."
"You . . . .you don't like my tie?" He stammered.
But she wasn't really listening. She was still trying to work out how Superman could go about unnoticed among them. How did a man disguise his face?
"Facial hair." she blurted out loud.
"What?" Clark asked in surprise.
"A beard or mustache." she said quietly to herself.
"You want me to grow a beard or a mustache?"
"Huh?" She realized she must have sounded a bit odd. "Not you Clark. It would be all wrong for your face."
"Really, Lois?"
"Come on Clark. Can you honestly tell me that if I'd asked you to grow a mustache or beard, you'd do it."
He seemed to consider her question with the utmost sincerity. "Honestly?" He asked.
"Uh huh." Lois said, putting her hands on her hips.
"I'd find a way to make it work."
"How hard can it be Clark? You just skip a step in the morning." She did a double-take "Wait. Are you saying that you'd do that for me?"
"Well, golly Lois. I'd do just about anything for you."
She gaped at him speechlessly. He would? He was looking at her with those wide blue eyes, and she was surprised to feel a faint flush steal over her cheeks. Clark was a bit corny, but he touched something inside her with that statement.
Were his eyes twinkling? It was hard to tell passed those thick lenses. "What do you think Just a mustache or . . ?" he trailed off speculatively.
If she didn't know better she would think that he was teasing her. "No. Don't you dare. I wasn't asking you to do that. Besides, you'd ruin your profile."
Clark gave her a pleased smile. "I would?"
She rolled her eyes. "Come on, Clark. We have a man to find."
SSSSSSSSSSS
They were in an all staff meeting. Lois was gnawing the end of her pencil and Clark couldn't stop watching, enraptured. Little indentations from her teeth scored the end. He couldn't figure out why he found this habit so fascinating. Perhaps it betrayed a vulnerably usually hidden in this determined woman, or it could be the way her mouth moved in an unconsciously sensual manner that made his breath go shallow.
He was taken completely by surprise when Lois leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "I know who Superman is."
Clark broke the pencil in his hand and dropped the two halves on the ground. He switched from feeling too warm to breaking out into a cold sweat. He glanced furtively around the room to see if anyone had overheard Lois' comment.
No one appeared to be listening. He couldn't dismiss that Lois still had his tie from this morning balled in her pocket. It was unusual for him to lose track of his articles of clothing, but to do so and attract Lois' notice was quite a blunder.
He cleared his throat as quietly as he could and said "Well sure Lois, Everyone knows about Superman. He's kind of hard to miss wearing that colorful outfit."
Lois wasn't even looking at him. "No. I mean when Superman's dressed as a regular guy."
Clark wondered if he could have a heart attack right in the middle of the staff meeting. It certainly felt like his heart was about to seize up in his chest. She knew, and she had waited to share this knowledge during a Daily Planet staff meeting.
"Can we talk about this later?" Clark had to gasp out.
"What?" she seemed distracted, and remarkably calm in light of her accusation. "How else am I going to prove my point?"
He closed his eyes in despair. She had planned this. He briefly fantasied about abducting her at super speed. And then what? Beg her to keep his secret? He couldn't do it. Even if no one noticed their departure, which was highly unlikely, Lois would be so furious it would probably just accelerate the damage.
Today was looking like it was going to be the worst day he'd ever had.
His best bet would be to deny her accusations and play up the clumsy Kent act for awhile. He'd probably have to move on in a few months, nothing too quick, or suspicions would arise. But he would never be safe once the seed had been sown. He'd miss the city, and ironically he'd miss Lois Lane most of all.
She wouldn't meet his eye. She kept starring at Ted Rosen from the Entertainment section, so that he began to suspect that something was amiss.
Lois grabbed Clark's steno pad and was the first one to rise to her feet when the meeting adjourned. She walked over to where Ted was seated then she did some strange maneuver that was somewhere between a leap and a fall. It was deliberately clumsy, something like he would do. She clipped Ted's head with the notebook and his blond hair went sailing onto the table in front of him.
The entire room stilled.
"Oh. My. God." Lois said so low that he was sure he was the only one to hear it. Her face was a picture of shock, and Clark began to doubt she had intended this to happen.
All eyes were trained on Ted's gleaming bald head. His eyes were wide in confusion as he gazed at his hair piece sitting on his notes like an escaped guinea pig. Clark felt sorry for the man. He was a big, quiet man that never said a bad thing about anyone, even under his breath. He hated to see him embarrassed this way. He had a strange feeling that it was somehow his fault this had occurred.
"Oops." Lois said into the quiet.
Then she grabbed the toupee and plopped it back on to his head. Ted rose to his feet, face flaming, and scurried away.
"Excuse me." he muttered as he left.
The tension in the room broke. There were a few muted laughs and Lois glared at the assembled news people. "No one ever says a word about this. Understand."
The crowd dissipated with silent obedience. Perry's brows rose but he remained silent as well.
Clark and Lois were left alone in the empty boardroom. Lois' actions combined with her words earlier suddenly shed light on this bizarre event. She might suspect, but she didn't know Superman's identity. The relief was so great that a huge, amused smile spread across his face.
"Clark!" She said admonishingly. "Don't laugh at Ted like that."
"I'm not." he began to laugh. "I can't believe you thought Ted Rosen was Superman."
"So what if I did? He's a nice guy, honest and . . . well.. . .I've always had a fondness for him." She said defensively. "I figured Superman would have to have some way of changing his appearance. I could see that something wasn't right about Ted's hair. I'm surprised I hadn't thought it before, although come to think of it, he is a bit on the short side."
No, Clark conceded silently it actually was a little too close to the truth for comfort.
Lois continued. "If Superman were to move about as a regular man, he'd need something to change the look of his features. A wig. A mustache. Or maybe even . . . a pair of glasses."
She was staring at him now. "He'd be just a little taller than you, maybe even the same height if you didn't always stoop."
Lois reached forward toward his glasses. Clark tensed, frozen in place. If it had been anybody else he would have evaded them, but Lois tended to make his concentration scatter. Unexpectedly, she ran her fingers through his hair as if she was testing the softness of it. "Nope. No wig. Funny. I never noticed how dark your hair was before."
There was a breathless quality to her words that made him feel that the room was suddenly too warm.
"I. Can't. Believe it." She said each word individually. Her eyes widened.
Clark's heart tried to pound its way free of his chest. Lois had figured it out, but with the look in her eyes he wasn't certain that was a bad thing.
She was beautiful, gazing up at him like she wanted nothing more than to kiss him. "You really do have incredible eyes."
He was overcome by it all, his secret revealed, his love returned, it couldn't be possible. The stress of it all finally overcame him. Clark's legs gave out as he collapsed into the nearest chair. He knocked a cup of coffee into his lap. They both watched the brown fluid drip to the ground.
Lois snorted then gave him a disdainful look "I don't believe it. I must be losing my mind." She took the tie out of her pocket and pitched it into the garbage.
"Come on, Clark. Let's take Ted out to lunch, and if you pay, I'll let you tell him what a fool I was to think that Superman worked at the Daily Planet." She said.
"He doesn't?" Clark asked hesitantly, inwardly wincing at his words.
"It was just a man's tie, Clark."
"Right." He agreed.
"I can't believe it." Lois muttered for a final time as they walked out of the boardroom. There was a wondering tone to her voice as she said too softly for anyone but Superman to hear. "I almost kissed Clark Kent."
Clark smiled, feeling as if the day hadn't turned out so badly after all.
End