Trilogy: The Scary Stories that You Probably
Don't Wanna Read....
By: *Sadly* Crystal Princess Ranma
Before you Read: I would like to put in, that I was forced to write this trilogy by Cosmic Castaway. SHE made me do it! It was her! I mean, we're just sittin' there in the grass, and she mentions something about Kouga and Egg Nog. The next thing I know, I'm bein' begged by her to write a story about him screwin' it, or somethin' along the lines of that... Please, don't shoot me! I'm just Cosmic Castaway's minion-person! I was hog- tied! HOG-TIED! She theatened to rip my pants off! (In fact, she nearly did!) "The elastic string! I wanna pull the elastic string thingy! Who gives a damn if your pants fall off? At least I'LL be happy!" My poor pants! Damn you, Shan-chan, DAMN YOU!!
Chapter 1: Kouga and the Egg Nog (Why Egg Nog, of all the god-damn drinks?!)
It was around Christmas time, I guess, and Kagome had just finished watching the 1st Season Of Ranma 1/2, (ON VHS!) and was getting kinda restless. She walked in her kitchen, wanting to grab a snack, but only to find Kouga sitting in a stick mess of--Egg Nog...
"Nani? Kouga-sama, what are you doing in my kitchen?"
"What does it look like I'm doin'? I'm drinkin' your egg nog! How come we don't gots this stuff in the Feudal Era?"
Kagome twitched. Not only was Kouga sitting in the middle of her kitchen floor, drinking egg nog, but he just had to have been wearing a T- Shirt that said "I love Grass Stains".
"This stuff is real good, Kagome-chan! Want some?"
"What I wanna know is how did you get here?"
"It was the Egg Nog, that brought me here...I love this stuff!" Kouga took another gigantic gulp, and smiled. "If only I had some Yaoi, to go along with it!"
"What exactly have you been doing with it? You haven't been screwin' the poor Egg Nog, have you?!"
"I'M NO STOOL PIDGEON!"
"I know you're not, Kouga-sama...it's just that...you and the egg nog...in that position...it's scaring me, and it's just plain...wrong..."
"Well, maybe I'm ATTRACTED to Egg Nog, okay?"
The ninth-grader flinched. "A-attracted to egg nog? NOW, that's just creepy." She helped the wolf-youkai to his feet. "Maybe you should go back to the Feudal Era." she told him. "I really can't assist you know, seeing that Ji-san, is having convulsions, after we went to the circus on Saturday."
Kouga looked at her. "What happened at the circus, Kagome-chan?" he inquired. She gave off a nervous laugh. "Well, um...on Saturday, we all went to the circus, and Ji-san was provoking the clowns, until one bit him..." she trailed off, then started up again. "...ever since then, he's been lying in bed, saying "'Floo-Floo, the clown.' He's really shook up about it..."
Meanwhile...
Upon seeing that they was no food, Sango really started to get nervous. "I have to have something to eat." she rocked back and forth. "I'm not the type of person to be fasting. I'm s'posed to be a Youkai Tijiya, right?" she asked herself. "But there's not a single thing to eat around here." she looked around. She was in the middle of nowhere--worse, she was in the middle of nowhere with Miroku, who had obviously lost it, and was being reduced to marrying a fork...
"Hey, it could have been worse." he said. "I could have married a spoon!"
Sango shrugged. "He's got a point." she stretched. "But, I have more important problems, then if you should name you child, 'Gaylord', or 'Lesbiana'..." she stood up. "I need food."
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw, a tall thick bag, of something. "Hmm?" she asked. "What's that?" she walked over to the item, and saw tht it was--Dog Food. (Mighty Dog, mind you Shan-chan).
"Hey, Sango." Miroku called. "If your that hungry, maybe you could eat that dog food!" Sango growled. "What kind of fool do you take me for, bastard?" she glared at the American dog item, that mysteriously wound up in Japan. "There is no way, I am going to eat dog food, no matter HOW hungry I am!"
5 Minutes Later...
"I feel so used..." Sango cried. "I can't believe I--" she was cut short by a burp. "ate dog food!" She stared at her hands. "What kind of animal am I?!" Miroku chuckled. "Obviously, someone who just ate dog food in 5 minutes..."
So, I haven't finished the whole thing...(Shan-chan sama'll be mad, and eat me...AND IT WON'T BE PLEASURABLE!) I'm still thinkin' this through...AND I'M TO DAMN LAZY TO EVEN START! I promise, Kohaku's gonna molest a hobo; Someone's gonna pop Shippou; Naraku's gonna get put in a zoo; Kaede's gonna be put in a Nursing Home; Sesshoumaru's gonna chaperone a fieldtrip to the Monkey Fair...the list pretty much goes on and on...
By: *Sadly* Crystal Princess Ranma
Before you Read: I would like to put in, that I was forced to write this trilogy by Cosmic Castaway. SHE made me do it! It was her! I mean, we're just sittin' there in the grass, and she mentions something about Kouga and Egg Nog. The next thing I know, I'm bein' begged by her to write a story about him screwin' it, or somethin' along the lines of that... Please, don't shoot me! I'm just Cosmic Castaway's minion-person! I was hog- tied! HOG-TIED! She theatened to rip my pants off! (In fact, she nearly did!) "The elastic string! I wanna pull the elastic string thingy! Who gives a damn if your pants fall off? At least I'LL be happy!" My poor pants! Damn you, Shan-chan, DAMN YOU!!
Chapter 1: Kouga and the Egg Nog (Why Egg Nog, of all the god-damn drinks?!)
It was around Christmas time, I guess, and Kagome had just finished watching the 1st Season Of Ranma 1/2, (ON VHS!) and was getting kinda restless. She walked in her kitchen, wanting to grab a snack, but only to find Kouga sitting in a stick mess of--Egg Nog...
"Nani? Kouga-sama, what are you doing in my kitchen?"
"What does it look like I'm doin'? I'm drinkin' your egg nog! How come we don't gots this stuff in the Feudal Era?"
Kagome twitched. Not only was Kouga sitting in the middle of her kitchen floor, drinking egg nog, but he just had to have been wearing a T- Shirt that said "I love Grass Stains".
"This stuff is real good, Kagome-chan! Want some?"
"What I wanna know is how did you get here?"
"It was the Egg Nog, that brought me here...I love this stuff!" Kouga took another gigantic gulp, and smiled. "If only I had some Yaoi, to go along with it!"
"What exactly have you been doing with it? You haven't been screwin' the poor Egg Nog, have you?!"
"I'M NO STOOL PIDGEON!"
"I know you're not, Kouga-sama...it's just that...you and the egg nog...in that position...it's scaring me, and it's just plain...wrong..."
"Well, maybe I'm ATTRACTED to Egg Nog, okay?"
The ninth-grader flinched. "A-attracted to egg nog? NOW, that's just creepy." She helped the wolf-youkai to his feet. "Maybe you should go back to the Feudal Era." she told him. "I really can't assist you know, seeing that Ji-san, is having convulsions, after we went to the circus on Saturday."
Kouga looked at her. "What happened at the circus, Kagome-chan?" he inquired. She gave off a nervous laugh. "Well, um...on Saturday, we all went to the circus, and Ji-san was provoking the clowns, until one bit him..." she trailed off, then started up again. "...ever since then, he's been lying in bed, saying "'Floo-Floo, the clown.' He's really shook up about it..."
Meanwhile...
Upon seeing that they was no food, Sango really started to get nervous. "I have to have something to eat." she rocked back and forth. "I'm not the type of person to be fasting. I'm s'posed to be a Youkai Tijiya, right?" she asked herself. "But there's not a single thing to eat around here." she looked around. She was in the middle of nowhere--worse, she was in the middle of nowhere with Miroku, who had obviously lost it, and was being reduced to marrying a fork...
"Hey, it could have been worse." he said. "I could have married a spoon!"
Sango shrugged. "He's got a point." she stretched. "But, I have more important problems, then if you should name you child, 'Gaylord', or 'Lesbiana'..." she stood up. "I need food."
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw, a tall thick bag, of something. "Hmm?" she asked. "What's that?" she walked over to the item, and saw tht it was--Dog Food. (Mighty Dog, mind you Shan-chan).
"Hey, Sango." Miroku called. "If your that hungry, maybe you could eat that dog food!" Sango growled. "What kind of fool do you take me for, bastard?" she glared at the American dog item, that mysteriously wound up in Japan. "There is no way, I am going to eat dog food, no matter HOW hungry I am!"
5 Minutes Later...
"I feel so used..." Sango cried. "I can't believe I--" she was cut short by a burp. "ate dog food!" She stared at her hands. "What kind of animal am I?!" Miroku chuckled. "Obviously, someone who just ate dog food in 5 minutes..."
So, I haven't finished the whole thing...(Shan-chan sama'll be mad, and eat me...AND IT WON'T BE PLEASURABLE!) I'm still thinkin' this through...AND I'M TO DAMN LAZY TO EVEN START! I promise, Kohaku's gonna molest a hobo; Someone's gonna pop Shippou; Naraku's gonna get put in a zoo; Kaede's gonna be put in a Nursing Home; Sesshoumaru's gonna chaperone a fieldtrip to the Monkey Fair...the list pretty much goes on and on...