Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or The Night Before Christmas.

Title: The Night Before Christmas-Inuyasha Style

Author: iloveprettysilverhair

Characters: The Inuyasha Group

Genre: Humor, Friendship

Prompt: Bark & Bite

Rating: PG for some swearing

Warnings: None

Summary: A twist on "The Night Before Christmas"


Kagome: "It's been a while since we've all been together like this, hasn't it?"

Sesshoumaru: "Not long enough, in my opinion."

Inuyasha: "Just shut it, it's not like I wanna be here either! Blame your bitch."

Kagome: "Hey!"

Miroku: "That was not very polite, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha: "Keh!"

Sesshoumaru: "Remind me again why I agreed to this?"

Kagome: "Because…you love me?"

Sesshoumaru: "Hn."

Sango: "I, for one, am glad to be here. Just like old times!"

Shippou: "Me too! So quit whining like a baby, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha: "Why you little…Don't hide behind Sesshoumaru's runt!"

Jaken: "How dare you insult Lord Sesshoumaru's ward, you filthy half-breed! You are not worthy enough to kiss the ground he walks-"

Sesshoumaru: "Be silent!"

Beat.

Rin: "Master Jaken, you're funny when you're angry."

Kagome: "Maybe we should just get this over with?"

Sesshoumaru: "Indeed."

Miroku: "So, who would like to do the honors? I would, but I *cough cough* have a scratch in my throat."

Sango: "Sure you do."

Inuyasha: "I sure as hell ain't doin' it. Shippou, you do it."

Shippou: "No way! I'm just a little kid! Besides, I don't know how to read."

Rin: "I think Lord Sesshoumaru should do it!"

Inuyasha: "Now that, I would like to see."

Sesshoumaru: "No. Do not smile at me like that Kagome."

Kagome: "Oh come on! You have such a nice voice. Please?"

Inuyasha: "Yeah, c'mon brother. Pleeeeaaaaaaase?"

Sesshoumaru: "Fine."

Together: "Yay!"

Sesshoumaru: "But no, interruptions. I will not repeat myself."

Together: *Grumble* *Mumble*

Inuyasha: "Get on with it already!"

Kagome: "Inuyasha…"

Inuyasha: "I'll be good."

Sesshoumaru: "I shall begin…Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the hut, not a creature was stirring, except for a half-breed mutt-"

Inuyasha: "Bastard."

Kagome: *Sigh*

Sesshoumaru: "Each stocking was hung by the chimney with care, but that of the mongrel, greatly needed some air."

Shippou: "Oh brother…"

Rin: "Milord's such a good story-teller!"

Together: *Giggles*

Sesshoumaru: "The children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of needless sugar danced in their heads."

Shippou: "I like candy."

Rin: "Me too!"

Sango: "Shhh…"

Sesshoumaru: "And Kagome in her nighty-"

Kagome: "Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru: "-and I in my cap, had just settled down for a long winter's nap."

Miroku: "And just what color, is this nighty?"

Sango: "You're such a pervert."

Rin: "What's a nighty?"

Inuyasha: "Can we just get back to the story?"

Kagome: "Yes, please."

Sesshoumaru: "When out in the clearing there arose such a blast, I sprang from the trees as Inuyasha did, though half-assed."

Inuyasha: "Can someone else tell the story now?"

Sesshoumaru: "Actually, I am quite enjoying myself. Now be quiet."

Inuyasha: "Then tell it right! You sonnuvabi-"

Miroku: "Um…Inuyasha. Innocent ears."

Inuyasha: "Keh!"

Sesshoumaru: "Away to the clearing I flew like a flash, armed at the ready, I drew my sword from my sash. The moon on the armor of the vile half-breed-"

Inuyasha: "Oh come on!"

Sango: "He isn't talking about you this time."

Inuyasha: "Oh."

Sesshoumaru: "Gave farce luster to the creature as wanted as a weed."

Inuyasha: "Now you're just stretching it."

Kagome: "Shh!"

Sesshoumaru: "When what to my "all-seeing" eyes did appear, but a witch made of wind and a little chit with a mirror."

Shippou: "He's talking about Kagura and Kanna, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha: "I knew that!"

Sesshoumaru: "With tentacles spurting, and miasma a dark blue, I knew in that moment it was Naraku."

Kagome: "Did you have to mention the tentacles? Gross."

Sesshoumaru: "More rapid than panthers, the demons all came; a nuisance to hinder and they were all fair game."

Inuyasha: "They're no match for me and the Tessaiga! Bring 'em on!"

Sango: "Oh yes, because you don't want or need our help at all, do you?"

Shippou: "You know you do Inuyasha!"

Jaken: "Shut up you ingrates! Lord Sesshoumaru is trying to tell the story!"

Sesshoumaru: "Now Kanna! Now Kagura! Now Goshinki he called then! On Byakuya! On Hakudoshi! And the Band of Seven! To the ends of the world they shall all look a fool, for they deserve not, the sacred pink jewel."

Rin: "Go Lord Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru: "The demons did charge, but were not up to par, my father's great sword sang with the cry of Wind Scar!"

Inuyasha: "Hell yeah! That's what I'm talkin' about!"

Sesshoumaru: "Many were felled, but some still remained; the dark half-breed, unhappy, held fury untamed."

Rin: "This is kinda scary."

Shippou: "Don't worry Rin, with me around, nothing will get you!"

Kagome: "You two are so cute!"

Inuyasha: "Could we? I want to hear more of the story!"

Sesshoumaru: "And then with roar, I heard him cry out; he took aim at us all though in his voice was small doubt."

Miroku: "Indeed he wouldn't be so sure of himself if all his demons were gone."

Inuyasha: "Damn straight; he better be scared!"

Sesshoumaru: "As I drew up my sword Naraku cried out with a moan, a boomerang struck him made of old demon bone."

Miroku: "That's my girl!"

Sango: *Blush*

Sesshoumaru: "His strength fading quickly; he attempted to flee, but a pure arrow stopped him its shooter, our key."

Kagome: "Awww! I never knew you felt that way about me."

Inuyasha: "Keh! You know you're important to our group, stupid."

Shippou: "That's the pot calling the kettle black."

Inuyasha: "Shut it ya little twerp!"

Sesshoumaru: "As I was saying…His life near its end, he looked broken-hearted; I struck down with my sword, his body all but parted."

Rin: "Ewww!"

Sango: "Really, did you have to go into detail?"

Shippou: "Coooooool!"

Sesshoumaru: "With no bees around, the monk drew back his beads; the hole that had cursed him, to salvation finally leads."

Miroku: "Who'da thought that Naraku would die from his own curse? It is nice to have a full hand back." *Waggles eyebrows*

Inuyasha: "You're such a freak, Miroku."

Sesshoumaru: "His droll little mouth set in a line very grim and his face all knowing that this was the end of him."

Inuyasha: "Yeah, I'll never forget that look. Damn bastard deserved a fate worse than death."

Sango: "I agree with you on that one."

Sesshoumaru: "The land finally free of the hideous beast was free to rejoice with sake and feast."

Inuyasha: "That was the best party ever."

Kagome: "I think you drank more than Mushin that night."

Sesshoumaru: "The mutt's round face overshadowed by his belly; that night shook hard when he laughed, like an oversized bowl full of jelly."

Inuyasha: "I can't help it if they kept telling me to eat more! You try turning down when it's fed to you by grateful women; I sure as hell ain't!"

Miroku: "Indeed they were quite grateful- eh, not that I would know personally. I only have eyes for you my dear!"

Sango: *Glare*

Sesshoumaru: "Passed out on the ground from sake of great wealth, my lips tilted to a smirk in spite of myself."

Kagome: "Leave it to you to be amused by your brother's inebriation."

Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha: "Half-brother."

Kagome: *Eye roll* "Are you two still hung up on that?"

Sesshoumaru: "A wink of an eye and a smile sincere, often returned me to the village to be more near."

Kagome: "Awww, your bark is worse than your bite, you know that?" *Swoon*

Inuyasha: "Enough sissy crap, just finish the story already."

Jaken: "For once, I agree with the half-breed!"

Sesshoumaru: "Life goes on for this group and their work, though the mutt with the ears is still quite a jerk."

Inuyasha: "Grrr…I've had just about enough of this shit! You're going down!"

Kagome: "Inuyasha….don't make me say it!"

Shippou: "She hasn't threatened him with that in years."

Inuyasha: "Fine. Just keep going."

Sesshoumaru: "A long future together is what the jewel foretold; no one knows how, but to us it's all gold."

Together: "…"

Sesshoumaru: "What, no snide remarks?"

Kagome: *sniffle* "Just keep going, you're almost done."

Sesshoumaru: "To all those who see us, we are an odd group indeed, but others would do well to follow our lead."

Rin: "What's that mean Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Miroku: "It means that even if you're different from someone, you can still be good friends."

Rin: "Oh. That makes sense."

Sesshoumaru: "I end this tale, the mood nice and light…"

Together: "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

This was something that came to me earlier and demanded to be written. Hope you enjoyed it; it's just something silly and fun ^_^

Whether or not you celebrate Christmas, I wish you all a very happy holiday season! Have fun, be safe, be happy!