"The Trouble With Desire"
By darthelwig
I don't own anything. I'm just having fun.
Wanda didn't have a lot of experience with men.
Pietro had always had a way with the ladies, though. She could count on him to be romancing a few different girls at any given time. She had little patience for the girls who flocked to him like flies to honey, and had always tried her best to keep her nose out of his affairs.
If Pietro had caught her in any one of the compromising positions she had caught him in over the years, he would have killed whoever the man was. She teased him about his hypocrisy, but he only laughed and told her, "No man is good enough for my sister."
Still, there had been some boys while they were growing up that piqued her interest. She had tried to keep them secret from Pietro, but somehow he always found out, and then that was the end of that. So her limited interactions with guys and intimacy had boiled down to a few heated kisses. Not much more than that.
And after they went through the experiments and acquired their powers, men didn't interest her in quite the same way anymore. She had too much experience with their minds. "Sooner or later, every man shows himself," she had said to Ultron, and it was true. She had seen far too much of the darkness in men's minds to feel at ease around them.
Especially when it came to lust. Lust made her feel dirty. Lust was a stranger undressing you with his eyes. It was a soldier imagining you naked while you were strapped down and helpless on the lab table. It was a group of men wondering if they could get you alone when you walked past them down a darkened street. She had seen lust. It made her queasy.
After that, the only man she wanted in her life was Pietro.
She had talked to her brother about it. They talked about everything, shared everything. He had done his best to understand, and afterwards his protectiveness reached new heights. He scowled at any man that dared to look at her too long. He inserted himself between her and any man that tried to approach. Wanda didn't technically need her brother to protect her, and most times would probably have bristled under his watchful eye, but in this she accepted his help. It felt good to have him watching over her.
However, this had left her extremely uncomfortable with her developing feelings for Vision.
Vision's mind had attracted her from the start. Unlike the minds of most men, his was orderly and calm. Tranquil, even. His thoughts didn't follow the lines of other men's. He looked for the beauty in everything. He found the smallest things absolutely wondrous. And best of all, he didn't look at a woman and see "sex."
Wanda found him very refreshing. He was so pure. But that also left her feeling more than a little dirty.
She wanted more from him. More than the little touches he already bestowed upon her. More than the late nights spent together talking about any and every subject they could think of. More than the platonic relationship they had settled into. She wanted more.
She loved him, like she thought she would never be able to love a man. She wanted to kiss him, taste him, make love to him. She desired his touch. She lusted.
She was absolutely disgusted with herself.
How could she shove these impure thoughts onto a beautiful being such as Vision? He wasn't the machine so many people considered him to be, but he also didn't think like everyone else. Would he even understand or want that kind of relationship with her? With anyone?
She was afraid to make a move on him and be rejected. She was terrified that she would somehow ruin their friendship. What was she supposed to do?
So Wanda kept her feelings to herself and tried to be content with what she had. Better that than to lose him completely. She needed him so badly that her heart ached, and she wouldn't risk their friendship for anything.