Written for HOA Oneshot day! Yay! Special Thanks to JaylaHeart for telling me all about it!

Disclaimer: I don't own House of Anubis.

It has been an entire year since I've seen them.

There wasn't really an excuse yet and I'm thinking that I shouldn't make one. I left because I didn't want to endanger the lives of the people I love, especially Fabian. I had to make the biggest sacrifice I have ever made in that very decision. And the fact that Gran was sick again finalized everything.

My friends won't listen to me, anyways. They were too caught up with the new girl, KT, and Joy. They must have forgotten about me already. Maybe even Fabian…

No, I refuse to believe that. I was sure that he loves me. I love him and I will always love him. Always. Always.

All of my focus was on my studies now. I had to get into a good college so that I could finally cure Gran of that illness. I just had to. She's the only family I have left and if I lost her, I don't know what I'm going to do. Surely my Anubis housemates won't accept me anymore after what I did to them. This thought haunted me for many months.

I kept in touch with Amber, now that she was in America with me. I was really proud of her when I found out that she got into a fashion school in New York. I've never seen her this happy before, even when she was dating Alfie or Mick or laughing with the others. All of us have something to do outside that house. I've started with that chapter of my life already. I'm just worried that my friends won't be able to adjust like I did. They were used to the comfort and convenience. Hard work for them will always be in the form of homework or sports.

That just wasn't it at all.

It was Sunday when I got the letter.

The return address was from the school, specifically my old house, which probably meant that this was from one of my old housemates. Fear shot through me like lightning. What if this was bad news? Did someone get hurt? Get kidnapped? Die? Was it my fault? Is it Fabian?

Oh God, I will never forgive myself if it was him.

With shaking hands, I gradually opened the letter only to be met with three words in neat yet slightly boyish handwriting.

Please come home.

It didn't indicate who specifically this was from but all of my thoughts ended with his face. Forever his face. I've hurt him and now he wrote me this just to make me feel guilty. Wasn't it enough that I cried myself to sleep for two months straight? Wasn't it enough that I overexerted myself during school so that, when I come home, I would be exhausted and my sleep deprived brain wouldn't think of him? Wasn't it enough that I sobbed whenever I see something that reminded me of him?

Gran worries.

I didn't reply for a very long time. Six weeks passed and I still haven't formulated any possible response to that letter. I couldn't say yes. It was unsafe for them, for everyone. I couldn't say no, either. He might not want to talk to me anymore after that. My brain hurts. My heart longs to be with them, where I belong.

My home.

They were waiting for it. Fabian swore to himself that he won't ever start or continue a conversation with anyone unless I return this to him with my final answer. This was what Amber said.

What can I tell him?

I wracked my brain for answers, hoping that intelligence might finally solve all of my problems. They never did before but it's worth a try now.

That itself took another three weeks.

Finally, after so many days of contemplation, the answer was here. All of my emotions were in those few words that I wrote. I wish he understands. He shouldn't ask questions. I looked through it, nodding once in affirmation.

I love you, Fabian, but I can't.

He never sent me another one after that.

Fabian:

That piece of paper was torn into pieces the moment I saw it.

She's not coming back. Why didn't she just tell me that? Why did she have to take such a long time thinking of an answer? Was she looking for the best way to break my heart?

I grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter, breathing heavily and crying hard. She's not here. I pressed it against my t-shirt, feeling the point go through and touch my skin just so.

Please come home.

I love you, Fabian, but I can't.

My life was falling apart at the seams. First, she left. Then, my father died. Everyone started ignoring me. Depression. Betrayal. Pain. Hatred. The only way to stop the pain right now is to feel more pain. I pressed it harder to my chest, feeling a small drop of blood soak through my t-shirt.

An invisible force pulled the weapon away from my flesh and threw it against the wall. I buried my face in my hands, shaking my head continuously. What did I do wrong? Did I do something wrong? I could have…. I should have…. No, no, No!

Please come home.

She's not coming home. She's never coming home. She isn't. She isn't.

I pulled my hair from its roots, sobbing into my arms. No one was here to watch me torture myself. Was I going crazy? Probably. Should I end my pain? Not yet.

I grabbed all of the objects I could and threw all of them, shards of glass and china cutting my skin easily. Where am I? Why am I here? Who can I trust? What do I like? What don't I like?

Thoughts were screaming at my head, forming gibberish and I couldn't understand anything. Confusion overwhelmed me. I was lost. I was alone. I was nothing.

The others found me curled up in the corner, eyes wild and face pale, surrounded by broken plates and mugs and glass. KT let out a silent scream, Jerome and Eddie helped me up. Mara called the doctor. Joy had tears in her eyes. Alfie helped clean up.

From the hallway, the phone rang.

Joy snapped out of her trance, wiping away any sign of her crying and jogging over to the irritating sound. She was arguing with someone but failed to let her side win. Was that a good thing? She whispered something to Patricia's ear and both of the girls came to an agreement. They took both of my hands and led me to the chair, handing me the telephone.

Her voice. Her beautiful voice.

"Fabian!"' She exclaimed, relieved. I clenched my hands to fists, feeling the cuts and bruises from the tips of my fingers to my collar bone. "Fabian! I need to see you. I'll come home."

I'll come home.

She'll come home! She's coming home. I'll see her again.

Finally.

Alright guys. I'm going to stop it there and not continue it anymore. I'm very sorry but I can't afford to write about another story when there are still so much others to worry about. If you want, you can continue it for yourselves but inform me first. Thank you for the support and please review!