DISNEY'S NOIR TOONIVERSE

Case File: The Pickeled Peter Pan Case

I own none of these characters, except for my variations on how I think they would be in their own world.

This is a sexy, dark, dark, dark, - did I mention DARK - Disney Universe fan fiction involving any and all characters that pertian to the story line. It's meant to be noir and is a murder mystery.

This is mature content, so if you don't like to see your favorite Disney cartoon characters, and any other cartoon characters from other networks portrayed in a dirty, dark, adult themed setting, find another fan fiction to read.

Thanks and have a nice day.

DISNEY'S NOIR TOONIVERSE

Case File: The Pickeled Peter Pan Case

I walked stealthily down the streets of this crappy little town, stalking my culprit. I was on another murder case, this time involving a very suspicious toon, who whose alibi didn't quite fit. They turned the corner ahead of me. As I caught up and turned to I was grabbed in surprise –

But let's not get ahead of ourselves here. You don't even know the beginning to the end of this crazy caper. My name is Rachael. I'm a private eye who hunts down rogue toons in the Tooniverse, the world where every cartoon ever created lives and dies. I've been trapped here for about a year, and I make a pretty good living, for a human. Most toons here are retired, and they only get commissioned back into work if someone plays the work that they've acted in. A huge, whole crazy idea that the producers in the human world came up with. Still confused? That's alright. So am I half the time of my life.
When I was sixteen, I found a real book of magic. I was curious and began to read spells out of the book which I had stolen from an old bookshop in town. I had also been watching Disney's Hercules and low and behold, I opened a portal into their world and have been stranded ever since. I've taken down criminal cartoon crime lords, toon sex rings, and a few ink drug busts that went pretty bust if you catch my drift.
Here in the Tooniverse, it's not all cotton candy and rainbows and heroes. The wonderful Disney cartoon characters you see aren't the same people. They are beyond anything you've ever met, and most of them are pretty corrupt. They're toons, not humans. The couples you see in those Disney movies, well, most of the time they aren't really together and in point of fact, don't get along that well. There are plenty of crime lords and porn stars in the toon world. You wouldn't believe how many of your childhood idols are really quite criminal. But there are also plenty of toons who aren't bad toons; they do a lot of good, and plenty of them are upstanding citizens. Like Gaston out of Beauty and the Beast. He's a pretty okay guy. In fact, he's not as much of an asshole as you would think. He's a real gentleman. And someday, I'll tell you how I got mixed up in the private eye business in toon town. More on that later.
I primarily stick to the Disney world of cartoons. I don't stray into Warner Brothers, or the anime and manga departments. Those places are a little more risqué in some places, tamer in others. Nickelodeon is not my foray either, but on occasion I have been known to make a few trips down to the big Nicktooniverse for a little sleuthing.

My story starts back say two weeks ago. I was sitting in my office, a crummy little room on the fifth floor of an out-of-date office building in the black and white part of Dizzy Town – Dizzy as in Disney Town – a real crum bucket of a place. The office was scarce more than a small apartment with bed, bath, kitchen, a very small living room. The whole place had been renovated to a small degree. There was a bed for anyone who felt like lying down, usually me when I had stayed up too late and it was too hard to make it back to my apartment in the Upper East of Dizzy Town. The office was sparsely furnished, plain and simple with blond hardwood floors and a plain desk with swivel lamp. Opposite my desk were two chairs for clients. Then there was my chair, big, plush, cushy, and very relaxing. I had an outdated computer from the Toon Tech Company – TTC, the biggest holder of stock in Dizzy Town since the old Mickster himself, who is Mickey Mouse by the way – and an even more outdated cartoon telephone like you see in the black and white toons of the twenties and thirties. His name was Billy and he was reliable as hell.
Here in the tooniverse, you can look like whatever you want to be, as long as it's within bounds of the world you came out of. I took on the look of the animation used for Beauty and the Beast. I bare no resemblance to Belle. I'm around five fourish, thin and somewhat curvy, a dark dark haired brunette, with ovular and angular features. I'm told I'm quite pretty; I am, but I'm not vain, and I usually do my best to play down my features to keep from distracting clients. I'm seventeen and one of the best toon detectives around, right next to good old Gaston, all around good guy and partner in the PI business.

I sat at my desk, riffling through papers, thumbing through credit card bills and wondering how the hell I was going to pay the electric when Gaston busted through my doors, holding a thick manila folder in his hands. I glanced up at him, my patience thin.
"Rachie," he said.
"Don't call me that," I said icily. I hated to be called Rachie or Rach or any other derivative form of my name, other than Rachael or Rae. Plain and simple. That's my cover.
He shoved my reproach to the side and continued with what he had been saying.
"This is a case you should take a look at"
"I'm not interested Gassy." Now he threw me an icy look. If there was one thing he hated, it was being called Gassy. I stifled a smile.
"It's important. A murder case." That caught my attention. Murder? In the Tooniverse? In Dizzy Town? That was impossible. Disney toons don't get killed. Maybe in the Animeverse, but not here. Not my town.
"Who?" I asked, standing up abruptly, my chair scooting back viciously as I leaned in close to Gaston, my hands griping the edge of the desk hard.
He sauntered over and sat on the edge, the folders held in his hand. He wore a black suit, the tie missing, the collar undone. His hair was cut short, waves framing his face handsomely. He was still as bulky and huge and handsome as ever, but he was many years my senior. He kept the file out of hands reach.
"Peter Pan." He let the words sink in deep. They stung without me even realizing how much it hurt to hear his name.
Peter Pan is in a permanent aging of twenty years of age. He's a hottie, with boyish, impish good looks, fiery red hair, and a roaring motor bike painted lime green. He's Dizzy Town's biggest and wildest bad boy. He's wiry and powerful and completely magical and mischievous, donning a black leather jacket and jeans that make him look uber sexy. Did I mention he also has the hots for me? He saved my life, back when I was still green and I had first arrived in the Tooniverse. But that is not my point. I owe Pan a big favor. But he's dead. I think.
"Peter is"
"Peter is not dead. He's being accused of killing Daisy 'Do Me' the Cow. You know her as the main female cow in all of Disney's farm animations of the twenties. Real popular back then"
"What would he be doing with a cow?" I was perplexed. Why would Peter Pan, baddest magical imp of the Disneyverse hang out with an easy cartoon cow? I had answered my own question. Because she was easy. "You tell me." Gaston looked at me like I was asking stupid questions, which I kind of was, and handed me the file. He wouldn't let go of it for a moment, staring at me intently.
"You shouldn't take this case," he said at my subsequent silence.
"You're the one who offered it to me." I leaned in, close enough that I could smell his aftershave mixed with the pleasant scent of his very well-built body. "I know," he answered, coming in closer. He leaned in to plant a kiss on me, but I pulled back at the last second and tapped his head lightly with the file. It was a game he and I played, cat and mouse, all the time. He groaned. Gaston thought he'd get the kiss this time.
"Sorry Tiger, not my style." I walked around the desk and headed for the door when he grabbed my wrist and turned me around to face him.
"You do this to me every time. You lure me in and throw me out. I'm a nice guy, not that schmucked up asshole they portrayed me to be in the movie." He pulled me close, towering above me at 6'2". I glared at him.
"Because you're a pen and ink drawing and I'm human"
"This isn't Cool World Rae. The world won't fall apart if"
"If I let you fuck me till I howl like Pluto?" His eyes darkened at my usage of words. "I didn't quite mean it that-" I interrupted him again.
"You meant it Gaston. Your eyes glitter quite lustfully every time we play this little game. And we've had this conversation before. I don't get mixed up with guys like you"
"You mean guy toons who are nice and aren't trashy bad boys who ride green motor bikes and stir up trouble." I looked away. He had pulled me to him, his body dangerously close to mine. It wasn't that I didn't want to get involved with him, that I didn't find him attractive, and it wasn't the fact that he was a toon. The truth was, I was still a virgin, though I didn't always act it, and there was the possibility that I could find a way home. If I did find a way home, did I really want to have an attachment here in the Tooniverse?
"It's not like that"
"Yeah it is. You don't want to be involved because you don't find me as exciting as that badass wannabe Peter Pan. He's nothing but a criminal who'll get you in trouble with the Toon Police and screw you over. He's a lousy, washed up, forgotten"
"Shutup!" I screamed. "You're just pissed off because I don't share the same desire to fuck around with you as you have for me. You're also pissed off that he swept me off my feet in that hot little bike of his before you could put your two cents in. He found me first and that just pisses you off." I pushed myself away from Gaston and walked out the door, leaving him with an angry, if not hurt expression on his face.

So that's the first chapter. Hope you liked it. Comment if you wish. If you didn't like it, well, I guess it's not your style then is it?

Adios.

The White Rabbit