Gotham Idol, a batman begins/dark knight fanfic

"Welcome to the first episode of..." The girl with the microphone points to the crowd behind her who screams "GOTHAM IDOL!!!"

(Insert awesome theme song here)

"Hi, I'm Lyn-z and I'll be your host for this season. Now let's meet our judges. First we have Erica Murphy!" Lyn-z Points to a 13 year old girl with black short hair and Brown eyes. "Next we have Nicole Gaida!" A girl with brown long hair, same age as Erica waves. "And last we have (of course) Simon Cowell!" Everybody knows who he is so he just sits there. Asshole.

"Our first contestant of the night is the assistant D.A. Rachel Dawes! who ISN'T dead! yet"

Rachel comes on stage and takes the mic from Lyn-z. The lights dims and the music starts with Harvey rapping in the beginning

Ahuh Ahuh (Always good girl never gone bad)
Ahuh Ahuh (Take three... Action)
Ahuh Ahuh
No clouds in my storms
Let it rain, I hydroplane in the bank
Coming down with the Dow Jones
When the clouds come we gone, we Rocafella
We fly higher than weather
And G5's are better, You know me,
an anticipation, for precipitation. Stacked chips for the rainy day
Jay, Rain Man is back with little Ms. Sunshine
Rachel where you at?

Rachel then starts singing

You have my heart
And we'll never be worlds apart
May be in magazines
But you'll still be my star
Baby cause in the dark
You can't see shiny cars
And that's when you need me there
With you I'll always share
Because

Rachel starts to dance around with a umbrella

When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be your friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now it's raining more than ever
But we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh)
These fancy things, will never come in between
You're part of my entity, here for Infinity
When the war has took it's part
When the world has dealt it's cards
If the hand is hard, together we'll mend your heart
Because

When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)

Rachel stops dancing and stays in the middle of the stage

You can run into my arms
It's okay don't be alarmed
Come into me
There's no distance in between our love
So go on and let the rain pour
I'll be all you need and more
Because

Rachel starts dancing again while the crowd screams.

When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)
It's raining
Ooh baby it's raining
Baby come into me
Come into me
It's raining
Oh baby it's raining

Baby come into me

Come into me!

(Rihanna Feat. Jay-z: Umbrella)

The lights goes back on and everybody cheers. Lyn-z comes back on the stage. "Well Rachel that was the best performance all night."

"But I was the only-"

"NOW! Lets hear the judges!" Lyn-z said quickly pointing to the Judges.

Erica claps "I have one word to say. WOW!" Everybody in the audience cheers at her words. Rachel just nods, with a giant grin on her face. 'What about you, Nicole" Lyn-z asks.

Nicole stands up. "I think you are very talented. You were nearly perfect, but you have to be more into the part. When you sang I just didn't feel it. You were close but not on the spot. But the performance itself was amazing" She sits down. Erica looks at her. "Bitch" She mumbles. Nicole looks at her, mouth open. "EXCUSE ME!?!" Nicole demands.

"Nothing, nothing" Erica looks the other way. Nicole narrows her eyes.

Simon sat there, un-amused. "I didn't like it."

Erica turned to Simon "Shut up Simon. You like nothing. And who the fuck invited you on this show anyways" she snapped at him.

Lyn-z quickly stopped the fight before it could go any farther "Okay, okay. Lets move on to the next contestant. Here he is, the clown prince of crime, the agent of chaos, The Joker!" The crowd went wild. People were holding up signs saying 'I love Joker' as the clown prince himself came on stage. Lyn-z tossed him the mic.

The Joker started singing and better then people would of thought.

Ok..
Guess who's back?
Back again
Jokie's back
Tell a friend
Whaaaaaaaa
Now everyone report to the dance floor
To the dance floor, to the dance floor
Now everyone report to the dance floor
Alright Stop!.....Pyjama time
Joker then started to rap and bounce across the stage

Come here little kiddies, On my lap
Guess who's back with a brand new rap?
And I don't mean rap as in a new case of child molestation accusation
HA-HA-HA-HA-HA
No worries, papa's got a brand new bag of toys
What else could I possibly do to make noise?
I done touched on everything, but little boys
That's not a stab at Michael
That's just a metaphor, I'm just psycho
I go a little bit crazy sometimes
I get a little bit out of control with my rhymes
Good God, dip, do a little slide
Bend down, touch your toes and just glide
Up the center of the dance floor
Like TP for my bunghole
And it's cool if you let one go
Nobody's gonna know, who'd hear it?
Give a little "poot poot", it's OK![Fart Sound]
Oops my cd just skipped
And everyone just heard you let one rip

Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy shake that ass
Oops I mean girl girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Just lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Go crazy
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Oh baby
(HA-HA)
Oh baby, baby
(HA-HA)

It's Friday and it's my day
Just to party all the way to sunday
Maybe til monday, I dunno what day
Everyday's just a holiday
Crusin' on the freeway
Feelin' kinda breezy
Got the top down, lettin' my hair blow
I dunno where I'm goin'
All I know is when I get there
Someone's gonna "touch my body"
Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk
But I'm feelin' just a little stressed out from work
Could you punch me in the stomach and pull my hair?
Spit on me, maybe gouge my eyes out? (Yeah)

Joker went up to Harvey, who was standing of stage waiting for his turn. Joker starts singing to him

Now, what's your name girl?
What's your sign?

Harvey stares and him and states "Man, you must be up out your mind"
Joker jumps back

Harvey! (HA-HA)
Beer Goggles! blind!
I'm just tryna unwind now I'm

It's Tuesday and I'm locked up
I'm in jail and I don't know what happend
They say I was running butt naked
Down the street screaming
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Well I'm sorry, I don't remember
All I know is this much
I'm not guilty
They said, "Save it, boy we gotcha you on tape
yellin' at an old lady 'touch my body!'"
Now this is the part where the rap breaks down
It gets real intense, no one makes a sound
Everything looks like it's 8 Mile now
The beat comes back and everybody lose themselves
Snap back to reality
Look it's !
Yo you signed me up to battle!?
I'm a grown man!
Chubba chubba chubba chubba chubba chubbie
I don't have any lines to go right here so, chubba teletubbie!
Fella's (WHAT?!) Fella's (WHAT?!)
Grab you left nut, make right one jealous (what?)
Black girls
White girls
Skinny girls
Fat girls
Tall girls
Small girls
I'm callin' all girls
Everyone report to the dance floor
It's your chance for a little romance whore
Butt squeezin' it's the season
Just go (HA-HA-HA-HA)
It's so appeasin'

UmMmMmm touch my body
UmMmMmm touch my body
Ooh boy just touch my body
I mean girl just touch my body

(Eminem: Just lose it)

Joker finishes with his creepy laugh. Everyone cheers. Lyn-z and Joker turn to the judges.

Erica and Nicole are jumping on top of the judges table screaming 'that was awesome'. You can guess what they think of the Joker song. But Simon just sits there, mouth open and eyes popping out.

"Okay, I guess you can see what they think. Thank you joker you can go" Lyn-z tells the Joker, who is blowing kisses to the crowd.

After the crowd calmed down, which wasn't for about 10 minutes, Lyn-z introduces the next contestant.

"Okay, next we have the rich and famous Bruce Wayne!" Bruce comes on stage.

"Thank-you Lyn-z, tonight I'll be singing-'

"Yeah Yeah pretty boy just start singing" Lyn-z interrupts, throwing him the mic. Bruce clears his throat and starts singing.

She's freaky and she knows it
She's freaky and I like it
Listen
She grabs the yellow bottle
She likes the way it hits her lips
She gets to the bottom
It sends her on a trip so right
She might be goin' home with me tonight
She looks like a model
Except she's got a little more ass
Don't even bother
Unless you've got that thing she likes
I hope she's goin' home with me tonight
Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
Man I swear she's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
She's freaky and she knows it
She's freaky, but I like it
She shuts the room down
The way she walks and causes a fuss
The baddest in town
She's flawless like some uncut ice
I hope she's goin' home with me tonight
And all she wants is to dance
That's why you'll find her on the floor
But you don't have a chance
Unless you move the way that she likes
That's why she's goin' home with me tonight
Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
Man I swear she's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
Those flashing lights seem to cause a glare
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned from everywhere
She's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
Now dance
Little girl
You're freaky, but I like it
Hot damn!
Let me put my funk on this one time

Bruce walks between the stage and the fans, touching their hands. Most of them being girls, and a few gay guys and I mean the type of gay guys you would see on will and grace, screams with love. Some of them screaming 'I love you! I want you to have my baby!'. Bruce quickly got back to the stage after someone said this and tried to pull him in the crowd.

Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
Man I swear she's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
Those flashing lights seem to cause a glare
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned from everywhere
She's bad and she knows
I think that she knows
Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
Man I swear she's bad and she knows
I think that she knows

Bruce starts going all Justin Timberlake and starts dancing while there is a instrumental part.

Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
She's got me love stoned
I think I'm love stoned
She's got me love stoned
I think that she knows, think that she knows, oh, oh

I think that she knows, Think that she knows, oh, oh

Those flashing lights come from everywhere
The way they hit her I just stop and stare
I'm love stoned from everywhere and she knows
I think that she knows
Think that she knows, oh, oh
And now I walk around without a care
She's got me hooked
It just ain't fair, but I...
I'm love stoned and I could swear
That she knows
Think that she knows, oh, oh
She knows, she knows, oh, oh

(Justin Timberlake: Love Stoned)

All the girls yell and scream "I love you Justin Timberlake! I mean Bruce Wayne!".

Lyn-z comes back on stage. "Well that was, well very sexy. But lets see if the judges agree" They turn to the judges. Erica was in a daze. All she said was "Marry me". Nicole was in the same position as Erica. Hell, even Simon was in awe. Bruce smiled, knowing there answers and tried to pry Lyn-z off of him cause her hugging was about to cut off his circulation. After 5 minutes of trying to get her off without going all batman, she finally let go. "Okay our next one is the dark knight, the cape crusader, BATMAN!" Bruce tensed up as she said this and shifted his eyes. Lyn-z looked at him weirdly. "Are you okay?" She asked. "Uh yeah. I uh I got to go return some video tapes" Bruce says, rushing off stage.

A couple of minutes later, batman jumped through the wall. "YOUR PAYING FOR THAT!" Erica yells at him. Batman rolls his eyes and takes the mic.

Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you
Well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Say it for me
Say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me
Heaven's gates won't open up for me
With these broken wings I'm fallin'
And all I see is you
These city walls ain't got no love for me
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And oh I scream for you
Come please I'm callin'
And all I need from you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

Hurry I'm fallin'
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh, I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

Hurry I'm fallin'

(Nickleback: Savin me)

Batman ended the song. The crowd was quite but only for a second before it went into a frenzy of clapping and yelling. Lyn-z went to the dark knight and turn to the judges.

"Well, judges what did you think?"

Erica, like always, is the first to talk. "I think that that song fitted you. But I want to hear more passion." Nicole nods in agreement. "He's the goddamn batman, He has no passion!" Simon says. Erica just stares at Simon and shakes her head. "Well I'm gonna shove my foot up your ass so far you can't see or hear. Asshole" Erica snaps back. Simon glares and Nicole and Erica and they glare back.

"I can feel the intensity!" Lyn-z exclaims. Batman glares at Simon with his 'death glare' which sends all three of the judges hiding behind their chairs. Lyn-z looks at the Judges.

"Wow, you have a amazing-" Lyn-z turns to where batman was gone. "He does that" A man voice came behind her.

Lyn-z turns and sees Gordon there. "Oh! It must be your turn to sing!" Gordon nods his head and takes the mic. The music too cops started.

Bad boys, whatcha want, whatcha want,
Whatcha gonna do when commissioner Gordon come for you.
Tell me, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do? Yeahhh?
Bad boys bad boys
Watcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do
when they come for you
Bad boys, bad boys
Watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do
when they come for you
When you were eight
And you had bad traits
You go to school and you learn the golden rule
So why are you acting like a bloody fool
If you get hot you must get cool