AN: WOWOWOW It's been a while since I updated. I'm so sorry for putting my loyal FF family under such stress and I am back from my hiatus! With plenty of news of course. I'm a senior (an almost graduated senior...1 MONTH!) and I just have not had the time to write until now, so I've spent my spring break writing like three chapters. For all those who've posted reviews and questions, I'll get back to them soon I promise. And of course, the highlight of my entire year (and for anyone else who cares) I'M GOING TO BUCKNELL UNIVERSITY so if anyone who's reading this goes there HI, please be friends with me. As always, I don't own this, and yes there are going to be some differences in quality, characters (although not too OOC), and I'll let you know if there's anything I'm doing that doesn't fit on purpose. So yeah, that's that, and Happy Reading~

When Districts Collide

Chapter 1: Wren

Two and a Half Months

I had become cold. I had become a stone. It was hard to touch me, I was ice. It seemed the only two who could break through me at that time were Isaac and Tobias, but even then they had trouble. I tried to convince myself I was becoming like Peter, being a leader, but really, we all knew that it was because of these Games. It didn't help to have the knowledge that every year, Theo, Adam and I would be going back to watch kids be put to the death in a rink where they had no choice. We were lucky we had four victors instead of two.

Theo was in the same boat as me, according to Tobias, and according to what I saw of him, which was very little. I wanted to be with him, I did. But my heart wouldn't allow it; it was dying. I was trying to shield him, everyone from my constant panic, my constant nightmare that I lived every day. Tobias said that Theo wanted to help, but I couldn't put that task on him, he would become as miserable as me. Well, if he wasn't already.

Today was one of my good days. I laughed when Tobias told a joke, and I smiled when Isaac carried me out of the Pit after lunch, back to the control room to check up on everybody. It wasn't easy being a leader, but I signed up for it, and it took my mind off of my panic. It seemed that Theo had taken off of leadership on my account, because he was worried that I wouldn't do my job if I saw him. In truth, I wanted to see him, and the only time I did was at dinner, in a group setting. When I had told everyone the news of our breakup, they still told him to sit with us, but they sympathized with me. Mels and Bri did at least.

It was a long two months, and I still could not get over it. I needed something, someone, to keep the edge off. I had turned to alcohol at one point, but I decided quickly against it, not wanting to succumb to any sort of addiction. Not from what I heard about other victors in the Capitol, who were addicted to other drugs. I've seen them on the screen, with their skin pale and wrinkled, their eyes dead and too large for their face. I shivered at the thought of ever becoming them, but I still needed something to take the edge off, so Tobias always put alcohol in my tea when I came over. I think he knew I also needed human contact, so he was open to me. His door was always open for me, I even had a spare key that now replaced Theo's. I still wore his necklace, because it was still important to me, but his key was sitting in my drawer.

My life was not an easy one, and it came with mostly work, and little play. It was the end of August, meaning that for those who were not members, school would be starting. Then, at the end of the year for them, the Aptitude test. Then, we, as leaders, and other volunteers, would train them. Then the Hunger Games. And repeat.

The only way I really occupied my free time was by going into my fear landscape. Only one fear had changed. Instead of going into the reaping, mine was now being in the Games again, faced with killing everyone. It didn't matter who, the faces changed every so often, but the fear was just simply going back into that Arena. The fear of me not making it into Dauntless also left, because not only was I in, I was highly ranked. So I had eleven fears.

I had just come out of it again when I heard Tobias' voice behind me. "You know that 'doing reckless things' I was talking about? Yeah, this is one of them." he stood against the glass door frame to the simulation center.

"Four, how did you know where I was?"

"It wasn't that hard to figure out, I was in your position once too."

"Right, I forgot. You just seem so happy all the time that I forget that you've felt pain too."

"I miss the old happy you, you know. Isaac and Theo aren't the only ones who lay claim to how you feel. I care. Come on," he gestured me to follow him, and we walked down to the chasm together, passing Theo and Isaac on the way there. I waved and Four nodded, and Isaac nodded back. Theo cringed and kept walking.

We went to the bottom of the chasm, found a rock, and sat down. He pulled out a flask of some sort of liquid. I sniffed it. Rum. That was a new one.

"Where did you get this one?" I asked him.

"Oh, stole it from the bar. They won't notice. So, tell me," he took a long drink and passed it to me. I took a couple sips, just enough to get the edge off, and handed it back.

"Tell me what your fears are."

"Well, they've changed. I lost one, getting into Dauntless, because obviously I'm in. But one changed to the Games. It used to be just the reaping, but now it's being in the Arena. The rest are still the same."

"How many fears?"

"Eleven now, I had twelve when I first started."

"No one here that I remember has ever lost a fear. That's strange. Normally the number stays the same, it's the fears that change." he thought out loud. "But you're Divergent, so you're just an anomaly all around. Not quite fitting anywhere."

"Thanks, Four. Means so much of you to say that." my sarcasm burst out.

"I'm only speculating! I mean, I know a lot about the GPs and all, so your case isn't too bad. Of course, you're not safe, but neither am I, or Theo, or anyone with awareness actually." he sat and looked at the water rushing past us, neither of us saying anything for a little.

"It's just kind of nice being with you. I know I've said it before, but I just like talking to you about this. It's easy. It makes me feel better."

"That's what I'm here for. I still think you should try talking to him." he was talking about Theo.

"I've tried, I would if he could stop being so hurt."

"You need to stop being so hurt, you know. I'm not trying to be mean, but maybe some of this panic would go away if you just stepped up and talked to him. Get it out of the way, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand. It's harder than it looks."

"I know. I've dealt with it."

"You've dealt with panic?"

"My childhood was the zenith of anxiety and fear." He meant his father. Everyone knew about Four.

"Oh right. Well, what do you suggest I do?"

"Like I've said before, just apologise."

"But I feel too guilty, he shouldn't just take me back. How do I get him to treat me like an equal, like someone who's done wrong? He refuses to accept I've done anything bad."

"Let's get Isaac, and we'll all sort this out. You need mediators. More than one. Isaac has seen more of Theo's point of view and I've talked to you more. We need a team effort. God, if Tris and I had had this, we wouldn't have fought so much." he chuckled under his breath as he took another sip.

"You weren't under the best circumstances either. But when do you think I should talk to him?"

"I think as soon as possible. You have a case of heartbreak and so does he. It's not fair of you to grieve over each other when peace can be made."

"You're so poetic. Since when?" I laughed at him as water sprayed over our feet.

"I think I've been listening to Adam too much at meals."

"Oh God, don't get me started. If it weren't Mels, it would be almost as bad as Caroline."

"For the poetry he writes, you'd think he'd fit better into Erudite or maybe still in Amity."

"He chose Dauntless to get over his fears. And the food." We started laughing louder, our voices echoing over the water. I didn't feel too bad now. I actually felt like I could stomach something, a feeling of hunger that I hadn't felt for a while. As I thought about it, my stomach growled.

"Hey, Four, do you want to grab some cake or something? I'm starved."

"Starved? That's a new one coming from you." he elbowed me.

"I know." I hadn't been eating regular meals, and the meals I did eat were sparse. The only reason I really ate was because people would send me to the hospital if I didn't. I hadn't felt really hungry since the Games started, because my body was so used to being in starvation mode.

"Sure, let's go get something. We can think of what you're going to say there." he stood and helped me off of the rocks. "Oh, Wren, around ten, meet me outside the front. I want to show you something."

"Yeah, of course, Four. I'll be there." We walked to the Pit, my heart set on food, like a true Dauntless should be.