Title: Fifth Act: Intermission

Fandom: Final Fantasy VII – for sinnatious' fic "Fifth Act"

Rating: G

Characters: Vincent Valentine, Zack Fair

Genre: Humour

Author Note: *WARNING* This is a piece of secondary fan fiction for Sinnatious's excellent "Fifth Act".

If you haven't read "Fifth Act" as of yet, you really, really, REALLY, REALLY should. It's a brilliant genfic where Cloud is sent back to pre-Crisis Core times, and is filled with wonderful character interactions and awesome action sequences. Go read it. You can find it in my favourites section. If you have read it, basically this is a short little crack!fic that takes place between Chapters 35 and 36 that Sinnatious was nice enough to let me write. This being said, since this was written without knowledge of the author's plans, it may or may not correspond to actual canon.

Unfortunately, I had this story written using a special font which got stripped away thus losing some of the fun of the story. If you'd like to see the proper version, you can find it on my lj.

Summary: In which Vincent attempts to perform his very solemn duty. Unfortunately for him, it's not going as well as he hoped.

Looming above ShinRa Mansion's entrance there was a window. Once it might have been majestic, glimmering with fountains of cerulean and deep yellow glass dancing across its surface. Once, but no longer. Now its wonder was stricken by a web of deep cracks and the gleam hinting at the splendour of its past was suffocated under thick layers of dust and dirt, leaving it dull and lifeless.

There crouched upon the window ledge was Vincent Valentine, waiting for Lucrecia's child.

The mountain wind howled and he let his crimson cloak flap frantically in the icy air, heedless to its struggles, his body utterly motionless as if time had forgotten him. None of it mattered. Nothing mattered. Nothing except—

"Are you suuurrrre you two aren't related?" Poking out of an adjacent window was a suspiciously hedgehog-like head of hair.

"We are not." The last few days had been something of a crucible. Whereas the other members of the group seemed to respect Vincent's need for... air – as one might put it – Zack Fair insisted on intruding in his deepest contemplations.

"Look, I can't pretend to know much about you, but I kinda got the feeling you had a thing with Sephiroth's mom. Besides whenever you're not busy, you both do these really cool poses. "

Perhaps once he would have considered himself worthy of such a gift. Back when he was young and whole, when he looked upon her with a longing tainted with degenerate lust, failing to recognize her true beauty.

Even then, if he had foolishly presumed such a thing was possible, children were not a recommended option for a Turk. He had given his life to his job, until one day, the difference between the two was almost non-existant. Only a thin veil of words separated them. A small courtesy. More for the sake of others than himself.

To bring life into his world, could easily doom any child of his to abandonment or worse. Whatever ugliness marred his soul, he'd long since decided… "Children are not a possibility for me," Vincent said.

"Huh? How come?" Eventually Fair managed to process this. "Oh! Uh, you did that…That's cool." He awkwardly scratched the back of his head, bumping his arm against hilt of the Buster Sword on his back. "I just thought with all you've been trying to do for him, that maybe there was something more going on"

It was only a meager payment for how much he'd failed Lucrecia's child. A child fed with poison and lies, and told that they were good and nourishing. A child now grown to manhood without anyone to guard him against the dark.

"It's kind a shame for Sepiroth though…"

So many sins.

"…I bet you'd be a good source of hair care tips."

Above him, the sky rumbled, dark and ominous, and the first frigid drops of rain stung his skin. Soon it became a torrent, plastering his thick raven mane flush against his face. Heaven's tears.

He would protect Lucrecia's child—

"Hey, you should adopt him!"

The ex-Turk whipped his head around and stared at the SOLDIER.

Fair had an entirely innocent expression on his face. "You've already go the over-protective, stalkerish dad-thing down pat."

Vincent forced himself to resume his previous stance, focusing intently on the ground just before the mansion's entrance.

He would protect Lucrecia's—

"You'd be a better dad than Hojo."

That much, Vincent supposed, they could agree on.

He would protect Lucrecia's child as best he could. But more than that? No.

He was too twisted. Too much of a failure. He would be too much of a burden to Sephiroth. Never would he be foolish enough to try to be could be anything more to the man…

Vincent couldn't shake the feeling that Zack Fair was grinning at him.