The night sky has grown quiet after so many hours of partying, although the whispers of giggling elves, gnomes, and brownies lingers. Although the hour is late, Elfhelm is a seldom quiet domain. Lying under a tree is Magnifico and Puck, who has been recently renamed to "puke" by his siblings, on account of an accident happening hours prior. The mysterious stowaway night with an uncanny resemblance to Azan slumbers deeply under a table, along with two gnomes he had recently been partying with. And atop a tree lies Pukes' monkey, Isidro, laying closely to a blue haired figure. Although there are more than a few brownies sleeping between them.
Off to the distance of the main party, Guts, Serpico and Roderick continue drinking, bearing their scars to one another as they increasingly drown in alcohol. "You'd be amazed by what I had to do to get my ship", slurred Roderick, clearly the most intoxicated of the group. "You'd be surprised what I've done for 3 silver coins" retorted guts, reminiscing on his past as a mercenary. Looking up at the stars, he begun to realize just how much time had passed. "Well", Roderick continued, "let's just say that I've yet to finish my payments for the ship". "There are things I'm not proud of... favours I've had to do... to be able to live the kind of life I want to live". Guts smiled slightly, remembering an old priest he met during his days slaying apostles. "To live doing what you want... no matter what" He said aloud, as if his inner monolog sprung outward. "I bet your ship brought you happiness". Roderick raised his glass, as if to cheer. Then suddenly dropped it and collapsed. Serpico, sluggish from drink, clumsily placed his hand upon Roderick's neck, just to verify he was still alive. Upon deducing he was fine, Serpico then turned to Guts. "Gut's..." he said in a calm voice, "you're a good friend". The two men locked their gazes upon each other, recognizing a familiar feeling both yearned for: Companionship. Although he voiced it like a banal truism, the words carried great weight, striking Guts like his own dragon slayer. "I... appreciate your company too" Guts said, almost forgetting the feeling of vulnerability.
Sometime later, a sudden crashing sound is heard. Off in the distance, some elves come rushing in, one carrying a pair of binoculars. "something's coming!" the first elf hectically cries, as if he just stepped out of the jaws of death itself. The second one curled up in a ball, too terrified to produce even a shriek. Guts knew immediately what the commotion was about. "Griffith" he thought to himself, instinctively placing his hand on the handle of his sheathed dragon slayer. Just then, a massive crash is heard, and a shockwave jets out, nearly knocking Guts off his feet. Before him stands a familiar sight - Nosferatu Zodd in his apostle form, his wings completely open in full glory. "I've been waiting for our rematch, Guts", he howls, with a voice so commanding the denizens of Elfhelm cower in fear. Guts begins to brandish his blade, disinterested in small talk. Zodd, locking eyes with him, adopts a defensive stance, as if ready to retaliate to anything Guts throws at him. At that moment, all of Elfhelm becomes silent. Zodd continues to utter taunts in his familiar, guttural voice. "Nothing to say before I tear you limb from limb?" Just then, a drunken satyr stumbles by, carrying a stein filled to the brim with smooth yet crisp looking beer. Zodd, beside himself with rage, screams "How dare you interfere with our combat!". Before Guts can even bat an eyelid, the satyr's human half is forcibly separated from the goat half, leaving a fountain and train of warm, fresh blood across the floor and atop a nearby table.
Just then, Nosferatu Zodd's eye moves towards the Satyr's stein. The crispness of the beer becomes salient to him, and for a moment, bloodshed and violence are absent from the monsters mind. "In 300 years of fighting in the battlefield, I have never seen such a delectable drink" Zodd murmured, surprising even the battle hardened Guts. Just then, his massive arm moves violently, as if to swipe at guts, but ultimately to grab the stein. As if by the design of causality, the stein did not spill, leaving its contents filled to the brim. In hand, his lips are locked to the edge of the cup, and in one swift gulp, he downs the entirety of its contents. "Graaaa" howls Zodd, so loudly that only Roderick remains asleep. "This is the best beverage I have ever consumed in my entire 300 years walking across battlefields! I demand mooooore!" The denizens of Elfhelm cheer, and soon, the party continues as if nothing happened, the corpse of the satyr being brushed to the side by 2 brownies.
Once again, all manner of glorious fantastical creatures continue to party, now invigorated to party to honor the death of one of their own. And once again, off to the corner, Guts and Serpico continue to drink, engaging in light banter and now joined by a severely intoxicated Zodd. "In my 300 years of traversing battlefields I have never engaged in a conversation that lasted more than 20 seconds!" he howls loudly, due to his still being in his apostle form. "Come to think of it, I have never been very open about my feelings these past 300 years!" "So... what did you sacrifice to become an apostle" Guts asks, giving Zodd a re-assuring gesture. "I don't remember!" Zodd forcefully beckons, without a shred of regret in his voice. Guts nods affirmatively, stating "well... we could never get anywhere if we were too afraid to step on ants". Zodd and Guts share a laugh, while Serpico looks mildly intimidated. "So..." Zodd asks, in a voice surprisingly human in terms raw loudness, "is it true that Farnese chick is your sister?" Guts looks stunned. "And you were planning to tell the rest of us... when exactly?" he asks, in an uncharacteristically satirical voice. "I don't talk about it much because it's associated with a bad memory" Serpico utters, in his usual, pain ridden voice. "Well, she made me burn this witch to prove that she wasn't my mom" Serpico utters. "Wait a second... but she was really was your mom, wasn't she?" Zodd asks. Serpico nods, with a tear in his eye. "That's tough brah" Zodd says affirmingly, with his tough, thunderous voice. "That chick is hot though. I'd totally bang her. Ten outta ten" he proudly screams, roaring like a lion in heat, producing such a strong shockwave that it knocks the passed out Roderick back a few inches.
Just then, as if in response to the howl of Zodd, a cold wind passes by, and an ominous feeling lingers in the air around them. Although it's source isn't seen at first, it's nonetheless a very familiar one. One that almost feels as if it belongs in elfhelm. One which is... almost like that of an elf. Guts springs up and looks behind him, Serpico and Zodd following suit. Behind them lies the familiar yet always eerie Skull Knight, atop his majestic stallion, gallantly walking forward. "Greetings once again, struggler" he says, in his familiar, monotone and nearly metallic voice. "You're highness!" Zodd thunderously roars, adopting an aggressive stance. "Immortal one, this is a strange place to meet thee" replies Skull Knight, completely unflinchingly. Just then, a great silence occurs, as Zodd and Skull Knight lock eyes. Skull Knight places his hand on his sheathed sword, pulling it out just enough for Guts to notice it's the sword of Actuation. Zodd brandishes his claws, and lets loose a devastating howl. Just then, an intoxicated centaur stumbles in between them, carrying a barrel of high quality, sour yet sweet white wine on his back. "How dare you interfere with our battle!" Zodd viscously cries, swiping at the centaur, and swiftly separating the horse half from the human. And once again, producing a wellspring of blood and guts, raining down upon them. The barrel of wine, however, remains completely unscratched, landing right side up right in front of Skull Knight. "The designs of causality can certainly be interesting" Skull Knight muses aloud, with Zodd nodding in approval. Just then, the two great beings lower their posture. Skull Knight steps off his steed, and begins to pour drinks into some nearby goblets. "A growing boy's gotta drink" Guts jests, receiving a drink from his new companions. "I mean look at you, you're just skin and bones". Zodd laughs hysterically, almost choking on his wine. Skull Knight remains completely unflinching, although he continues to pour wine for the others. In the background, two very traumatized looking satyrs drag the corpse of their falled comrade, placing it next to that of the satyr.
"So... I've always wanted to know about that freaky sword of yours". Serpico asks Skull Knight. "Well" Skull Knight responds. "It is called the sword of actuation, and it was forged inside my body using the fetishes of a distant time and abstract place that leads to the home of the master of the 5 angels, the one who directly controls the tides of causality from which we all -". "Booooring!" Yells Zodd, so intoxicated that he appears to have pissed himself. "I always wanted to know what you're such a sour sport" he asks, pushing Serpico aside. "I mean, in my entire 300 years on the battlefield, you never accepted any of my invitations to just fight casually. There always had to be a deeper reason for you to brandish your sword. Like, to go against the tides of causality or some shit. Why couldn't we just duke it out for shits, you dig brah?" Skull Knight remains quiet, apparently disinterested in the senseless violence Zodd appears to have dedicated himself to. Turning to respond to Serpico, he states "In order to struggle against the forces of causality, I have taken it upon myself to -". Guts then interjects, drunkenly and bluntly stating "just say it in once sentence!". "It's made of Behelits" Skull Knight reluctantly states. "There, where's the fun in that. Just saying it like a pleb. I thought you guys liked it when I talked all ominously and shit. I mean, wasn't it cool?".
Suddenly, Guts had a realization. "Behelits" He thinks to himself. Just then, he has a flashback to a time in his past. He remembers himself as a young boy, still in Gambino's mercenary company. He's running through the streets of a market town when, all of a sudden, he happens across a stand run by an apparently elderly fortune teller. Guts stops in front of it, looking into his glowing red eyes. The fortune teller ominously tells him "Fellow Stuggler, by the design of causality, I happen to possess a fetish from the deepest depths of the astral world. A fetish which can produce a -" "boring, Guts states, running off. "Wait!" The fortune teller yells. The tent bursts, revealing himself to be riding a lavish black horse with glowing red eyes. "It is by the design of causality that you-" "boooring" the young guts retorts back, continuing to try to avoid the creepy stalker. The fortune teller pulls off his garb, revealling himself to be a metalic skeleton with a word made of behelits. Suddenly, Guts' mind returns to the present.
"All those years ago... it was you that was the fortune teller" Guts says in complete shock. "Yes, my fellow strugger" Skull Knight responds. "And you have yet to recieve the fetish that by the laws of causaluty-" "boring" Guts once again states. "Just take the god damn behelit!" Skull Knight uncharacteristically yells, throwing a dark blue behelit into Gut's non-damaged eye. "I've been following your dumb ass for 24 years, trying to give you this stupid rock. And you just keep bitching about how boring you find my explanations. Well fuck yall Imma going home!" Just then, Skull Knight uses the sword of actuation to create a portal in space and time and leaves giving two middle fingers. "Fuck yall!" He yells, leaping through the portal.
Guts looks down, admiring the behelit he now has in his possession. It's like his other behelit, but it feels different. It feels... like his. Just then, Farnese, shireke, and Casca walk into the scene, alongside the Fairy Queen. "Everyone" She states, "the mental operation was a great success. Casca is better!" "Yay" everyone says, clapping loudly. Just then, Guts knows what he must do. "I sacrifice all of you" Guts says, and soon, his behelit opens its eyes and does that trippy dimensional scream thing and everyone gets eaten by demons and guts turns into that badass dark beast dog thing except his apostle form also has a huge dick. Also, his behelit was the special "anti-crimson navy blue behelit", so he was able to teleport in his new apostle form to Flaconia in the middle of the night and easily one punch Griffith like he did in their last encounter. He then pulls his pants down and begins spanking him repeatedly as Griffith yells "No!". Void and the rest of the Godhand watch, satisfied as the design of causality was carried out and when Guts dies, his sword joins his comrades atop the hill of swords. Also, Silat, Rickert, Erika, and that freaky yogi dude all crashed on their way to the Bakiraka's headquarters so they all died before any of this even happened.
The end.