I'm sorry for taking so incredibly long with this one, I've just been totally out of ideas for it. And it is a spin-off/sequel to Instant Everything. It's not absolutely necessary to have read that one, but there's a bit of background in it, that might explain more about the characters.
Hope you like it :)
It all falls down
Chapter one: tell me it isn't true
'Jess' gone'
'What do you mean she's gone?' Danny asked with a sigh.
'What do you think I mean? She's gone, like vanished, disappeared, gone' I almost yelled at him, letting all my frustration shine through.
'Hey, calm down' Frankie said and placed a hand on my shoulder. 'She's probably only taking some time away from everything'
As much as I wanted to believe her, I couldn't. Despite everything we had been through, I knew she wouldn't just pack up and leave like that, not without telling anyone.
'She's not and I know it. She won't answer her phone and I've been to her apartment, no one's there either' I muttered and recklessly flung myself of the couch, causing my wrist to end up underneath me. 'Fuck, fuck, this days just keeps getting better and better'
'Doug!' Frankie said sternly. 'You have to get over this, she doesn't want to talk to you, you have to leave her alone'
'Just tell me one thing Frankie' I began slowly. 'Have you talked to her the last couple of days?'
She cleared her throat before answering. 'No, not really, but that doesn't mean…'
'Yes it does. You don't know her like I do' I yelled. 'She wouldn't just leave like that'
'Doug, calm down' Danny added. 'Maybe you should just take this as a sign to let her go. She broke up with you dude; there's nothing you can do about it. And I don't mean to be harsh, but seriously, you can't go around moping over her anymore, it's starting to affect you way to much. It's not healthy'
'But…'
'No buts Dougie. You have to let her go'
I looked at both of the before returning my eyes to the spot on the floor I had been looking at for the past minutes. I slowly shook my head and took a deep breath; I had to get out of here, no one believer me anyway. Not even my best friends. I knew the only meant well, but they don't know Jessica like I do. No one does.
'Fine' I sighed and got up from the couch. 'I'm going home'
'Are you sure you're going to be ok?' I heard Frankie call after me but I didn't respond. I just waved my hand at them and closed the door behind me.
After getting back to my own apartment I looked the door and turned off all the lights until I could barely see my hand in front of me. I made my way to the bedroom, stumbling over things scattered across the floor, but it didn't bother me, nothing did anymore. When I reached it, I sat down on the edge of the bed and reached out for the photograph standing on the bed-side table. It was a picture of me and Jessica, smiling and laughing together. Just like it had always been in our relationship, and everything about the picture told the same story. The story of two people so deeply in love that nothing could get to them, the happiness that shone from their eyes could never be wiped away.
At least that's what I thought. But obviously I was wrong.
I lay back in bed, still clutching the photo in my hands, and closed my eyes letting the memories wash over me once again.
'Snoop Dougie Dog?'
'What's the shizzle my fizzle?'
'Ehm…Yo?'
'That was the weakest so far' I clutched my stomach from laughing so hard. 'Haha, yo…'
'Well excuse me for not being as good as you are' she said with a frown and scrunched her nose a bit. I couldn't help but smile at how adorable she looked when she was pretending to be mad.
'You are so cute right now' I said as I wrapped my arms around her waist.
'I'm still mad at you'
'No you're not' I smiled down at her. 'You can never stay mad at me'
'Fine' she sighed. 'I'm not mad at you, ok. Besides, you are way to cute to be mad at'
'I know, it's a burden I have to bear every day'
'Stop being so full of yourself' she added and playfully slapped me on the arm. 'That, is not cute'
'Sorry, I couldn't help myself' I chuckled.
'Damn me and always falling for that laugh' she said and stood on her toes to give me a kiss on the cheek. 'You sure have a way with me, don't you?'
'I sure do' I replied lifting her up from the ground so that her eyes were at level with mine. I gave her a soft kiss on the lips before whispering in her ear.
'I love you, you know that don't you?'
'Yup'
'Yup?' I asked confused. 'I tell you I love you and you say yup?'
'Yup' she giggled. 'I love you too, silly, don't worry'
'I won't'
'Come on now Doug-man, let's go. I don't want to be late'
'Only if I can drive, I'd like to make it through today alive thank you very much'
'Hey, not fair, I'm a good driver'
I raised my eyebrows and looked at her. 'Ehm, yeah right. You are so not driving'
'Fine' she finished with a pout. 'But, one day mister, one day'
'We'll see about that' I answered and lifted her up from the floor again and proceeded to carry her out of the house.
'I can walk you know'
'I just felt like doing it like this, do you mind?'
'Not really, I've got new shoes on and they kind of hurt, this is nice'
'Girls' I muttered as I carried her laughing self to the car.
I was roughly awoken by my phone ringing from somewhere beside me. Shooting up from the bed I almost fell of it in my search for it but when I looked at the screen my heart sank. 'Tom'.
I sighed loudly before answering it. 'Hello?'
'Hey, it's me'
'Yeah, I know'
'Danny told me what happened before' he continued.
'Oh, did he?'
'I believe you Doug'
'Well I don't care what you think. You don't know her as well as…What did you say?'
'I said that I believe you. And so does Dani'
'But why?' I asked quietly.
'They usually talk every Monday night, same time every week, and this week they haven't. Dani told me about it this morning, she doesn't believe that Jessica would just take off like that without telling anybody'
'That's what I said' I answered, happy that someone actually felt like me.
'But, you know, people just don't disappear like that'
'I know'
'It is still more likely that she just needed some space, maybe from all of us' he said quietly, knowing how I'd probably react to it.
'I've tried to tell myself that so many times, but I just can't believe it. Something is wrong with her'
'So, what do you want to do about it?'
'I have to find her' I said determinedly. 'If only to have her say it to my face'
'Ok, let me know if there's anything I can do to help'
'I will. And thanks, for believing me'
'No problem mate. I'll talk to you tomorrow'
'Ok, bye' I finished and hung up the phone. I lay back on the bed and replayed our conversation in my head. They actually believed me but somehow that fact didn't make me feel better, now it was official, Jess was really gone.
I fell back into a restless sleep, filled with dreams about Jessica and me, happy dreams, but the all ended the same way, with her disappearing. She told me that she didn't love me anymore and then she ran out on me, while I just stood there.
'I don't love you anymore'
'I don't believe you'
'I'm sorry' she said quietly before turning around and running out of the house. I stood there, unable to move, trying to fight the pain that was searing through my heart. I couldn't breathe anymore, let alone run after her, I just stood there.
I woke up the next morning in a flood of sweat. Last nights dreams were still playing in my mind, and hearing those words again brought everything back to me. I turned my head and focused my eyes on the picture of us again. She looked so beautiful in it, her eyes glistening as she laughed at something I said.
Suddenly I couldn't take it anymore; I reached out my hand and knocked it over. I watched it fall to the floor before I realised what I'd done and bent down to pick it up again.
'I'm not giving up on you' I said quietly putting the picture back in its original spot.
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'Why are you talking like this?' he asked as I looked down on my hands.
'Don't be like this, Doug. Its not you and you know it' I sighed.
'How can you say that? I thought that you loved me!' he yelled at me.
'I…' I began trying to find the words. 'I just can't do this anymore'
'Do what?' he said angrily.
'This, us' I answered quietly trying to avoid looking at him. The hurt in his eyes was so evident and I hated being the one to do this to him but I didn't have a choice. Taking a deep breath I finally looked up and found myself, once again, lost in his eyes. His beautiful eyes that I loved so much.
I felt a single tear fall down my cheek and as I uttered those final words, I could actually see his heart break in front of me.
'I don't love you anymore' I breathed. 'I'm sorry Doug'
To this he said nothing; he just stood there staring at me, trying to understand.
'I don't believe you' he said finally.
'I…' I tried but I couldn't form any words. Instead I turned around and ran out of the house, away from the guy that I loved with all of my heart. When I reached the street my vision was so blurred by tears that I could hardly see and I had to stop because I was sobbing so hard I hard trouble breathing. I turned towards the house and took one last look at it before entering the car that was waiting for me.
'Doug' I whispered quietly as tears began to fall once again.
