Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter… ::sobs hysterically::
Just so you know I like reviews! This is my first attempt at comedy so if its so lame you want to cry tell me! Even better tell me how to fix it or if its so abysmally pathetic its unsalvageable tell me!!!! Any way on with the story XD
phoooaaargh factor
chapter1
There was a loud thump as I collided with another person, a tall, dark, and handsome someone. Some one who goes by the name of… oh crap, Sirius-friggin-Black.
I am a gagganourmous knobnose… oh crap I'm still staring at him… I look like a total noob… still staring… wait… his apologizing? And giving me my books… WHY AM I STILL STARING?!?!?! SAY SOMETHING… ANYTHING!!!!
Uh… thank… you??? I have to see to a… think… think… cheese…cake?
Why did I say cheesecake?!? Why!
Wait a minute, where is he? He walked away! What kind of person walks away from a person who's thanking them! Rude!
Hey loser! What's that on your robes? You can't seriously be getting any?!
Is that… oh god it is!.. Are those studs?! Yes… yes they are… ok hmmm maybe I should give it back? Maybe not. That would be very awkward, I can see it now.
"Uh hi Sirius you remember me? Yeah I'm that retard that bumped into you this morning, so any way your studded condom sort of slipped out of wherever you hold them into my dis-proportionate cleavage, so here you go have fun shagging all the people who tease me."
I don't plan on having that conversation any time soon.
Ok I'm walking back to the ravenclaw common room to get taunted into further insanity. Is it my fault that I accidentally set the fifth year girls dormitory on fire? Candles smell good! Ok… and its not my fault that all the essays were flammable! They should make parchment out of something other than paper! Like… I don't know, something not flammable!
As for losing us the quiddich cup... I still say its not my fault! It's because that stupid robert henderton decided that groping me in potions was a good idea. Slapping him was a reflex! It's not my fault that rebecca decided to walk behind him with a huge bottle of chlorophorm at that moment! And I ask you is it my rfault that he just so happened to be the teams seeker! NO, NO IT IS NOT.
any way I'm in the common room now dodging glares. you'd think I went nutso and killed like fifty billion people, from the way they're looking at me. Geez. Any way off to the bathroom. I'm looking in the mirror, I'm wearing polka dot pajamas and I don't look horrible…I'd say average. My long dark hair swept into a messy bun with a side fringe, I'm kinda tall and gangly with boobs and big brown eyes. So basically I'm an olive skinned broom with a bun and boobs. Oh yeah… attractive. As if Sirius would notice me. Maybe if I returned his… no that's not the kind of noticing I want.
::sigh::
My phoooaaargh factor is like negative 104767890987654323468652585214825 where as Sirius… well his factor wouldn't fit on this page.
If you like where this is going review!!! Please! If you don't I don't care! Just say something even if it's the nastiest burn in the world I implore you to please just leave a message it doesn't take long. Oh and if you do like it I promise that chapters will be loads upon loads longer this was just a tester! So don't forget REVIEW!!!!!!