CHAPTER ONE

My name is Evian. And this is the uncencored, unblurry chapter of events whith my time with the boyband hotties who all wanted me. One Direction, obviously incase u didn't get that already lol.

It all strted on tht faithful day when psymon cowwel was stayin in the sme hotel as me,

"helo" i said inocently, as he walked up the hallway. After all he is famous!

"I can't believe its really you!?" i squeaked in delight, !

"you better believe it, baby girl" he said in his familiar bitirish voice, just like Austin powres. Then he grabbed my ciltorius, and my vagina flaps. I gasped, with a inward groan. It felt kinda good, yeh, but im not admitting that.

"let go ov me, you old perveofile!" i creamed, crying. Hoping someone would hear my please of desperation.

"no one, can hear you sicko. This place is soundproof." He smirked, like a pirvofile does.

I gasped, and heaved, how could i ever escape this madman. He licked his lips and smirked again. I resigned to the idea that i just have deal wiv it i suppose. He is famous, he has power. So dominatnt. So beautiful. TOO BAD HE'S SO FUKIN UGLI1! Get him awak, i though.

"Help! Somebofy! Anybody!? Help" i whispered ~ sad Lion king music~

"put that hand back where it cme from or so help me!" i low, slow and swexual voice whispered screamily. As they slapped away simons old criusty, hairy hands from my genetils. "or i'll set luois walsh,, on u!" the new, dark, curly, mysterious stranger threatened, sexily. Psymon ran away like dog scared of vaccum.

"You saved me!" I gasped, voice full of emotion and gratitude.

"Um, yeh. Sorry bout dat, he's always getting up to no good lol" he shrugged "gotto keep an eye on that one. Ok. But plz put dat vagina away. It's distractin & entrancing lol!" he giggled. I giggled.

We both laughed as i pulled my, thrilly, sexy yet practical panties up.

"why, u seen sumfin you like!? Lol, jk. No but really u r hot" i wanked. ;-]

"whats ur name?" it was as if a garnier commercial had started, he swifted his beautifully sculpted curli locks out his eyes and fluttered them. They were so blue and big . . like something else i was noticing in his nethern regions. . HIS NEW OPHONE 5! (dnt sew me apple K)

"we should swape numbers, my names harry" the suddenly no longer stranger replied. I funbled with my phone, desperate to not let this oppportnity escape me. But i still remembered to be cool.

"whats your name, buttermuffin" i gasped, he had a nickname 4 me already. We were totlly fucking soon.

"It's evian.." I said, shyly. "You wouldn't by chance be, the Haryy . STyLES!?"

"well, evion. But if u prefere u can still be my buttermuffin.. i am the one, the only harry styles. One fifth of English-Irish boy pop boy band One Direction. Based in London. Consisting of Myself, Niall Horan, Zayn Malik and two other hotties. ;-] we have have sold over 14 million singles and 8 million albums worldwide!"

"oh wow" i floated, impressively. "That's impressive"

"I know." He said, arrogantly. " HEY! How abaout as an apology Simons RUDE behaviour.." Psymon wiggled his eyebrows in the far end of the corridor, but harry just shook his delicate head at him in dissagrement " YOU CAN COME . . ON TOUR WITH ME!? What'dya say? You seem like the ty[pe of porson i want to get to knw." He smiled dazzling at me.

Breathlessly i agreed. "if this is all bcoz i had my vajayjay on show, i will find out and whip you something awful! hahaha"

Harry just laughed with me, but look slightly nervous. Cheeky boy.

I was definitely getting a taste of teh 1D soon!

~**END OF CHAPTER**~~