A/N: Hi. *Kits waves* Uh basically this is the product of a mini dare on a list were on. It is possibly one of the worst Mary Sues on the web, except ours is bad on purpose. We admit it. *both hang heads*

You can try and sue us if you want but technically we're both minors writing under assumed names so uh Good luck. And why are you picking on us anyway? Have you not seen some of the rubbish that is in circulation out there? Sheesh! At least we admit ours is bad *Bianca smiles infuriatingly*

Pre warning: This Story will probably not make sense. It is full of inside jokes and idiosyncrasies. DO NOT READ IT IF YOU WANT GOOD LITERATURE. You've been warned.

The Even More Story

Col. Hogan stood at the door to his office and observed the scene in front of him. Kits and Bianca, the two ring-in's from the future, were sitting at the main table playing cards with his 'first' team. Ever since they'd found a time travel transporter program through the Internet and some 'smart group' they were members of, they'd been frequent visitors at all hours of the morning when the rest of their world slept. He frowned.

"I thought I'd ordered you two back to your own time and bed." He glanced at his watch "It's 3 am! You shouldn't still be up!"

Kits looked up and grinned. "First of all, technically we're not in the military, so we don't have to obey you. Secondly we haven't been born yet so you can't make us do anything and thirdly you're a fictional character... " Kits broke noticing at Hogan's darkening look.

"….and we were about to step through the portal but Newkirk upped the betting and because we're millionaires due to economic inflation we thought we'd stay!" she finished in a hurry.

Hogan gave Newkirk a *look*.

"But, sir!" he protested. "At least if they're here we can keep an eye on them. Do you really want them," Newkirk looked pointedly at Bianca, "floating around in the '70's?"

"What was wrong with the 70's!?" Bianca spoke up indignantly.

Kinch snorted and made a Star Trek sign. "Beam me up Scotty!...You tell me."

"Hey! Watch who you're knocking!" shouted Kits, her love for Star Trek

making her forget caution.

Carter clamped a hand over her mouth as everyone looked to the door. After a minute, it became evident that no guards were going to come crashing through. Carter removed his hand, and all of the men glared at Kits.

Kits grinned sheepishly. "Oops... sorry?" she said.

Just then there was a noise from the tunnels. Hogan glanced at Kinch, confused.

"Are we expecting any- ?" he started to ask, but trailed off as he noticed the frenzied 'let's get outta here!' looks that Newkirk and Bianca were giving Kits.

Kits obviously wasn't catching on. Hogan, however, was a bit brighter. He blanched and asked them, "You were about to step through the portal when you decided to stay?"

Bianca bit her bottom lip. "Uh-huh."

"So the Portal was open?"

Bianca looked at Newkirk "Uh....yes Sir." He answered for them.

Kits finally caught on "Ruh-oh" she said.

And with that, the bunk bed opened and Kathy M. stuck her head into the barracks.

"Hey, Kathy!" Bianca waved. Kathy M. looked up.

"Oh, hey, Bianca!" Kathy waved back. "Where... are... we?" she began to ask, when she caught sight of Hogan and his men glaring at her. "Oh my gosh..." She suddenly squealed. "OH MY GOSH!"

Kits groaned, and Bianca quickly tried to stop Kathy M. as she stormed across the barracks "Whoa, mate!"

Hogan, noticing the woman running towards him, had hurriedly stepped back and was pinned against the wall. LeBeau snickered at the man, who straightened and fixed his cap. Meanwhile, another head popped out from the bunk.

"Pauline!" Bianca cried.

"I hope no one else comes," Kits sighed. Suddenly, someone began rapping the bunk again. Pauline glanced at Kits.

"I'm a jinx..." she muttered. Bianca agreed readily, smiling broadly. An argument began, and the original Heroes were distracted with trying to get them to be quiet; Hogan was dodging Kathy M., who was comparing her jacket to his. "I knew it was Brown!" she was crying.

Kinch was attempting to block anyone else from entering by sitting on the bunk.

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP!" Carter suddenly yelled. Everyone froze in place, and stared at the normally dormant young man. Newkirk regained his senses, however, and did the most sensible thing - pulled Carter's hat over his eyes.

Kinch suddenly realized that more than one person was pushing the bunk,

and quickly stood.

"OW!" a suspiciously familiar voice cried.

"Are you ok?" another asked. Kinch looked exceedingly worried, and everyone waited, barely breathing, to see who would emerge.

"Hello-" Patti started.

"Guys!" Marg finished. They looked at each other and grinned. Hogan and LeBeau - who was, in a way, protecting the Colonel - exchanged glances.

Bianca voiced everyone's thoughts when she piped up,

"Oh, boy... " but ruined the moment by adding "I need a smoke."

Newkirk's face brightened. "Smoke!" he repeated "What 'ave ya got?"

Colonel Hogan's face grew thunderous "How old are you!" he demanded

Bianca indignantly drew herself up to her full 5 feet 2 inches and replied "20! Where I come from, I'm legal!"

"How do you figure that?" LeBeau asked

"Oh that's easy" Pauline answered helpfully "You think of the number you first thought of, add 10, then subtract 4, then add a day, think of a different week....."

Kinch groaned "Another Crittendon" he mumbled.

"Well they killed the last one!" Kits spoke up pointing at Patti and Marg.

"But it was her idea!" Marg protested pointing back at Kits whilst Patti nodded in agreement before looking at Colonel Hogan and adding "According to Kits you're in the middle of a Nervous Breakdown!"

Hogan raised an eyebrow and turned to Kits. "Is that so?" he asked

"Uh…weren't you guys going for a smoke?" she asked looking at Newkirk and Bianca desperately.

Before they could answer Diane popped her head up the tunnel. "Did I miss the chat?" she asked

"Who're you?" Carter asked back.

"ColreHogan." Diane replied

"No you're not, I am!" Colonel Hogan protested

"No! I've always been colrehogan! Get your own sign on name!"

"What's a 'sign on' name? 'Col R.E Hogan' is my real name!"

Kathy spoke up "Uh Diane, he really is Col. Hogan!"

Diane still didn't pick up on it "Kathy! You're still here!" she exclaimed surprised to see the forum leader.

"Yes! And you can see me" Kathy elucidated. {Bianca played with the thesaurus to get that word *beams proudly*}

"Oh" said Diane, then as it became clearer "Ohhhhh!"

"Colrehogan, meet Col R.E. Hogan" Pauline introduced being the ever diplomatic personality.

Whilst this little exchange was going on Kits, Bianca and Newkirk were inching towards the door hoping to make a getaway.

Just as they were about to open it and as if there wasn't enough confusion going on already the door burst open and Shultz walked in.

A/N Hi *waves* us again. Do you want more?  'Cause it's written! Who's next? Is it Carol, or Laurel or Candy or.….the flying monkey's we've heard so much about? Can it get any worse than this? Probably not, but we'll try anyway!